[SUBMITTED] When the hail comes crashing down

[Tishanda]

Renamed to "When the hail comes crashing down".
Hello,
This is the first issue idea I have posted on this part of the forum, so please be nice, thanks!
I am definitely willing to take ANY suggestions people have. One of my problems on this one is I tried to pick stats for all of the options as best as I could, but I don't know if they fit well or not. I also don't know if their is another issue already like this one as I have never heard of one or seen one.
Most recent draft below. Draft #7

Title: When the hail comes crashing down

Description: As you may or may not know, an unusual storm system hit the southern areas of @@NAME@@ late last night. Which involved extremely large hail that caused heavy damage to the infrastructure, not to mention reports are showing the death toll could already be in the hundreds. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

Validity: Valid for all nations

Options:
[option]"It's something you think could never happen to you," says @@RANDOMNAME@@. "One day I'm just minding my own business and all of a sudden this grapefruit sized piece of hail falls right down in front of me! Like everyone else around here, my house was destroyed! We really could use as much money and donations as possible; this truly is an emergency. Of course I may have never invested in insurance, but who cares? Do it for the well-being of @@NAME@@!"
[effect]the government helps when they want to in times of need
[stats]compassion increases, niceness increases, political apathy decreases, rudeness decreases, death rate decreases

[option]"Listen, I know we need to help," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your long time assistants. "But we simply don't have the means of providing what is needed. My idea is we just let them clean the mess up on their own, that way all citizens get to know what it's like to do backbreaking work for once in their life. It would totally be a good thing for them, right? Wait a second, I can't remember if I got insurance on that house or not, uh oh!"
[effect]the government could care less about their citizens during times of need
[stats]apathy increases significantly, death rate increases, rudeness increases, health decreases, youth rebelliousness decreases

[option]"We should just send donations over a extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew. "I'm all for conserving money, but I just simply can't bear watching these people suffer right now. The government should send donations possibly a few times every other week, this way we are still contributing without putting too much of a burden on @@NAME@@ or the taxes."
[effect]the government replaced it's most important positions with 5-year old know it all's
[stats]apathy increases, niceness increases slightly, corruption increases, tourism decreases

[Leppikania]

Mention how the relief money would call for a tax rise.

but I just simply can't bare watching these people suffer right now.

Should be "bear" here.

donations as possible, this truly is a emergency."

Use a semicolon here; it makes it easier to read. And it should be "an" instead of "a".

[Tishanda]

Mention how the relief money would call for a tax rise.

but I just simply can't bare watching these people suffer right now.

Should be "bear" here.

donations as possible, this truly is a emergency."

Use a semicolon here; it makes it easier to read. And it should be "an" instead of "a".

Will do! Thanks.

[Tishanda]

Draft #2

Title: When the waves come crashing in

Description: As you should already know, a large part of Mount @@NAME@@ crashed into the sea late last night. This caused a massive tsunami wave that flattened many villages and has killed a unknown amount of people. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

Validity: Valid for all nations

Options:
[option]"It's something you think could never happen to you," says @@RANDOMNAME@@. "One day I'm just minding my own business and all the sudden I hear high pitched screams and what seems like a stampede of people running up to higher ground. Like everyone else around here, I lost everything! We really could use as much money and donations as possible; this truly is an emergency. Who cares if it raises the taxes that much, it's for @@NAME@@!"
[effect]the government helps when they want to in times of need
[stats]compassion increases, niceness increases, political apathy decreases, rudeness decreases, death rate decreases

[option]"Listen, I know we need to help," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your long time assistants. "But we simply don't have the means of providing what is needed. My idea is we just let them clean the mess up on their own, that way all citizens get to know what it's like to do backbreaking work for once in their life. It would totally be a good thing for them, right?"
[effect]the government could care less about their citizens during times of need
[stats]apathy increases significantly, death rate increases, rudeness increases, health decreases, youth rebelliousness decreases

[option]"Sigh, we should just send donations over a extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew. "I'm all for conserving money, but I just simply can't bear watching these people suffer right now. The government should send donations possibly a few times every other week, this way we are still contributing without putting too much of a burden on @@NAME@@ or the taxes."
[effect]the government focuses on family members views over anybody else
[stats]apathy increases, niceness increases slightly, corruption increases, intelligence decreases significantly, tourism decreases

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Welcome! Glad to see some good writing here, and proper attention to the recommended format. This is always a strong start.

Let's start with your premise:

Description: As you should already know, a large part of Mount @@NAME@@ crashed into the sea late last night.

"As you should already know," is an interesting narrative approach that has never been used before. I like it!

This caused a massive tsunami wave that flattened many villages and has killed a unknown amount of people. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

A tsunami is a wave caused by seismic activity. This would just be a "splash wave". However, the physics here is off: you're not going to get tsunami sized waves from something falling into the sea.

A better set up might be an underwater volcanic eruption.

A broader problem, however, is the idea of basing the issue around a natural disaster that remains a source of trauma for a lot of players world-wide. Having a tsunami-issue at this time might be viewed as insensitive. However, others have disagreed with me before on this point, and it shouldn't be taken as an absolute view of the editing team, just my own musing.

[Tishanda]

Welcome! Glad to see some good writing here, and proper attention to the recommended format. This is always a strong start.

Let's start with your premise:

Description: As you should already know, a large part of Mount @@NAME@@ crashed into the sea late last night.

"As you should already know," is an interesting narrative approach that has never been used before. I like it!

This caused a massive tsunami wave that flattened many villages and has killed a unknown amount of people. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

A tsunami is a wave caused by seismic activity. This would just be a "splash wave". However, the physics here is off: you're not going to get tsunami sized waves from something falling into the sea.

A better set up might be an underwater volcanic eruption.

A broader problem, however, is the idea of basing the issue around a natural disaster that remains a source of trauma for a lot of players world-wide. Having a tsunami-issue at this time might be viewed as insensitive. However, others have disagreed with me before on this point, and it shouldn't be taken as an absolute view of the editing team, just my own musing.

Thanks Candle.
I'll get working on a new draft.

[Tishanda]

Draft #3

Title: When the waves come crashing in

Description: As you should already know, a massive underwater volcanic eruption hit @@NAME@@ late last night. This caused a massive wave that flattened many villages and has killed a unknown amount of people. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

Validity: Valid for all nations

Options:
[option]"It's something you think could never happen to you," says @@RANDOMNAME@@. "One day I'm just minding my own business and all the sudden I hear high pitched screams and what seems like a stampede of people running up to higher ground. Like everyone else around here, I lost everything! We really could use as much money and donations as possible; this truly is an emergency. Who cares if it raises the taxes that much, it's for @@NAME@@!"
[effect]the government helps when they want to in times of need
[stats]compassion increases, niceness increases, political apathy decreases, rudeness decreases, death rate decreases

[option]"Listen, I know we need to help," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your long time assistants. "But we simply don't have the means of providing what is needed. My idea is we just let them clean the mess up on their own, that way all citizens get to know what it's like to do backbreaking work for once in their life. It would totally be a good thing for them, right?"
[effect]the government could care less about their citizens during times of need
[stats]apathy increases significantly, death rate increases, rudeness increases, health decreases, youth rebelliousness decreases

[option]"Sigh, we should just send donations over an extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew. "I'm all for conserving money, but I just simply can't bear watching these people suffer right now. The government should send donations possibly a few times every other week, this way we are still contributing without putting too much of a burden on @@NAME@@ or the taxes."
[effect]the government focuses on family members views over anybody else
[stats]apathy increases, niceness increases slightly, corruption increases, intelligence decreases significantly, tourism decreases

[The Immortal Elysium]

"Sigh, we should just send donations over a extended period of time,"

"an" should be here instead of "a".

[Tishanda]

"Sigh, we should just send donations over a extended period of time,"

"an" should be here instead of "a".

Fixed! Thanks!

[The Immortal Elysium]

"Sigh, we should just send donations over a extended period of time,"

"an" should be here instead of "a".

Fixed! Thanks!

No problem.

[Lychgate]

"Sigh, we should just send donations over a extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew.

This should be: ...time," sighs @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew.
I've never heard of someone saying "Sigh" out loud.

and all the sudden I hear high pitched screams and what seems like a stampede of people running up to higher ground.

This should be: and all of a sudden, I heard high-pitched screams and what seemed like a stampede of people running up to higher ground.

...late last night. This caused a massive wave that flattened many villages and has killed a unknown amount of people. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

This should be: late last night, causing a massive wave, which flattened many villages and killed an unknown number of people. Your citizens are looking to you during the tragic aftermath of this disaster.

the government focuses on family members views over anybody else

This one isn't very strong. Maybe try something like: "The government has replaced its chief advisor with @@LEADER@@'s 3-year-old niece", more along those lines.

-The second option really doesn't apply to nations with A) low tax rates, and/or B) high gov't spending on Int'l Aid and/or Welfare. Maybe adjust validity to compensate?
-Not sure why intelligence decreases on the third option. To me, it seems like a sensible approach that wouldn't have that consequence, but that's just me.
-There's some more things too, but I think you need to fix these first. You're off to a very strong start, which is good, but you still have work.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

I'll come to the rest later, but I'm a strong believer in getting the description right before going any further.

Description: As you should already know, a massive underwater volcanic eruption hit @@NAME@@ late last night. This caused a massive wave that flattened many villages and has killed a unknown amount of people. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

You've used "massive" twice there in a short space of time. And now we're looking at an underwater volcano, we can actually call it a tsunami.

Now, much as I like "as you should already know," I wonder if its a bit clumsy here.

I'm also thinking that "villages" being the main victims suggests a low population nation, and that there ought to at least be an estimate of casualty numbers.

Can I suggest something like:

Description: A massive underwater volcanic eruption last night has caused a tsunami that has devastated the east coast of @@NAME@@, causing untold property damage and with early estimates of casualties already in the thousands. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

That'd be tighter writing.

However, while that would work in writing terms, the core question still remains: Is a tragedy of this nature a suitable issue for NS?

We've been having a similar conversation backstage, with an exemplem issue draft I assembled on Boko Haram and the treatment of the kidnap victims since their release, and that issue was one with good questions to ask and an engaging narrative. However, it was also one with no humour possible in it without being tasteless, and the broad consensus (which I agree with) is that NS should be humorous, or satirical. It can ask serious questions, but should do so with some humour. Any question where humour would be tasteless is probably best avoided.

My feeling remains that the tsunami tragedies that continue to be major causes of suffering and loss of human life (with 280,000 killed only 12 years ago, let's not forget) and thus may not be the best topic for a light hearted and humorous game.

[Tishanda]

I'll come to the rest later, but I'm a strong believer in getting the description right before going any further.

Description: As you should already know, a massive underwater volcanic eruption hit @@NAME@@ late last night. This caused a massive wave that flattened many villages and has killed a unknown amount of people. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

You've used "massive" twice there in a short space of time. And now we're looking at an underwater volcano, we can actually call it a tsunami.

Now, much as I like "as you should already know," I wonder if its a bit clumsy here.

I'm also thinking that "villages" being the main victims suggests a low population nation, and that there ought to at least be an estimate of casualty numbers.

Can I suggest something like:

Description: A massive underwater volcanic eruption last night has caused a tsunami that has devastated the east coast of @@NAME@@, causing untold property damage and with early estimates of casualties already in the thousands. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

That'd be tighter writing.

However, while that would work in writing terms, the core question still remains: Is a tragedy of this nature a suitable issue for NS?

We've been having a similar conversation backstage, with an exemplem issue draft I assembled on Boko Haram and the treatment of the kidnap victims since their release, and that issue was one with good questions to ask and an engaging narrative. However, it was also one with no humour possible in it without being tasteless, and the broad consensus (which I agree with) is that NS should be humorous, or satirical. It can ask serious questions, but should do so with some humour. Any question where humour would be tasteless is probably best avoided.

My feeling remains that the tsunami tragedies that continue to be major causes of suffering and loss of human life (with 280,000 killed only 12 years ago, let's not forget) and thus may not be the best topic for a light hearted and humorous game.

Yeah I agree, I do kind of feel odd using the tsunami part of this and that's why I liked the underwater volcano idea you came up with. I'll do my best to edit so it works better. Thanks for your input.

[Tishanda]

Draft #4

Title: When the waves come crashing in

Description: As you should already know, a massive underwater volcanic eruption hit coastal sections of @@NAME@@ late last night. This caused a very large wave that caused heavy damage to the infrastructure and reports are showing the death toll could already be in the thousands. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

Validity: Not valid for nations with low tax rates

Options:
[option]"It's something you think could never happen to you," says @@RANDOMNAME@@. "One day I'm just minding my own business and all of a sudden I hear high pitched screams and what seems like a stampede of people running up to higher ground. Like everyone else around here, I lost everything! We really could use as much money and donations as possible; this truly is an emergency. Who cares if it raises the taxes that much, it's for @@NAME@@!"
[effect]the government helps when they want to in times of need
[stats]compassion increases, niceness increases, political apathy decreases, rudeness decreases, death rate decreases

[option]"Listen, I know we need to help," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your long time assistants. "But we simply don't have the means of providing what is needed. My idea is we just let them clean the mess up on their own, that way all citizens get to know what it's like to do backbreaking work for once in their life. It would totally be a good thing for them, right?"
[effect]the government could care less about their citizens during times of need
[stats]apathy increases significantly, death rate increases, rudeness increases, health decreases, youth rebelliousness decreases

[option]"We should just send donations over a extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew. "I'm all for conserving money, but I just simply can't bear watching these people suffer right now. The government should send donations possibly a few times every other week, this way we are still contributing without putting too much of a burden on @@NAME@@ or the taxes."
[effect]the government replaced it's most important positions with 5-year old know it all's
[stats]apathy increases, niceness increases slightly, corruption increases, tourism decreases

I'm gonna keep working to add a little humor into this as possible. For now I think I'm gonna stick with the disaster being a wave caused by the underwater volcanic eruption instead of just being a tsunami, the last thing I wanna do is upset people who have gone through something like that. I'm trying my best to keep it as light hearted as possible but if it doesn't work then I am fine with just not submitting it.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Ah, what I mean to say is that a wave caused by an underwater volcanic eruption IS a tsunami. You can't make it not so by avoiding the word.

Perhaps you could change the natural disaster entirely, to make it something more easily humorous? Something like hail-storms wracking the coast? That also gives lots of humour potential with lines like "balls the size of oranges" and "how would you like it if you got smacked in both eyes at once by a pair of balls...? Er, ice balls, I mean."

[Trotterdam]

We already have issues about natural disasters, so a simple "send relief / don't" issue doesn't feel like it adds anything new if it doesn't address the particular peculiarities of this type of natural disaster.

(I am not, however, in the camp of people who believe that we shouldn't acknowledge the existance of unpleasant topics because it's "insensitive".)

"As you should already know," is an interesting narrative approach that has never been used before. I like it!

#257

There, there was a good narrative reason why this is something you should already know.

A tsunami is a wave caused by seismic activity. This would just be a "splash wave". However, the physics here is off: you're not going to get tsunami sized waves from something falling into the sea.

Most tsunamis are caused by undersea earthquakes, but it is possible (albeit rare) for a tsunami to be caused by a large landslide or meteor impact. (We're talking about dinosaur-killer scale meteor impacts, here.)

A volcanic eruption (or dry earthquake) on an already-unstable mountain could conceivably cause the required amount of rock to fall into the ocean. Cumbre Vieja is famously alleged to be on the verge of causing such an event, though it's the kind of alarmist doomsaying that you shouldn't hold your breath for. See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Megatsunami#List_of_megatsunamis for past examples.

Although possible, these are, at any rate, rare events.

Perhaps you could change the natural disaster entirely, to make it something more easily humorous?

I do not like your sense of humor.

[Tishanda]

I could always change the disaster, yes. Something along the lines of hail wrecking the coast could be kind of funny to some people.

[Tishanda]

Ah, what I mean to say is that a wave caused by an underwater volcanic eruption IS a tsunami. You can't make it not so by avoiding the word.

Perhaps you could change the natural disaster entirely, to make it something more easily humorous? Something like hail-storms wracking the coast? That also gives lots of humour potential with lines like "balls the size of oranges" and "how would you like it if you got smacked in both eyes at once by a pair of balls...? Er, ice balls, I mean."

That second part made me laugh way too much. Lol

[Candlewhisper Archive]

I do not like your sense of humor.

Aware of that, mate, but at least I have one.

(mic drop)

[Drasnia]

I do not like your sense of humor.

Aware of that, mate, but at least I have one.

(mic drop)

OOOHHH!

[Tishanda]

Draft #5

Title: When the hail comes crashing down

Description: As you should already know, an unusual storm system hit coastal areas of @@NAME@@ late last night. This caused extremely large hail that caused heavy damage to the infrastructure, not to mention reports are showing the death toll could already be in the hundreds. Your citizens are looking to you during this time of tragedy.

Validity: Not valid for nations with low tax rates

Options:
[option]"It's something you think could never happen to you," says @@RANDOMNAME@@. "One day I'm just minding my own business and all of a sudden this grapefruit sized piece of hail falls right down in front of me! Like everyone else around here, my house was destroyed! We really could use as much money and donations as possible; this truly is an emergency. Who cares if it raises the taxes that much, it's for @@NAME@@!"
[effect]the government helps when they want to in times of need
[stats]compassion increases, niceness increases, political apathy decreases, rudeness decreases, death rate decreases

[option]"Listen, I know we need to help," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your long time assistants. "But we simply don't have the means of providing what is needed. My idea is we just let them clean the mess up on their own, that way all citizens get to know what it's like to do backbreaking work for once in their life. It would totally be a good thing for them, right?"
[effect]the government could care less about their citizens during times of need
[stats]apathy increases significantly, death rate increases, rudeness increases, health decreases, youth rebelliousness decreases

[option]"We should just send donations over a extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew. "I'm all for conserving money, but I just simply can't bear watching these people suffer right now. The government should send donations possibly a few times every other week, this way we are still contributing without putting too much of a burden on @@NAME@@ or the taxes."
[effect]the government replaced it's most important positions with 5-year old know it all's
[stats]apathy increases, niceness increases slightly, corruption increases, tourism decreases

[Australian rePublic]

Welcome to Got Issues!


1. Description- "As you should already know" it's not an issue if you know about the problem
2. Description- Change "This has caused" to "which involved"
3. Description- "Hit coastal areas" this sounds it hit the whole coast line. This isn't likely. For example, if you look at Greece, Thessaloniki and Kalamata are both coastal, but don't even have the same climate, much less the same weather. Becomes even more complicated when dealing with massive nations, such as the United States or Canada
4. I don't see why this needs to have low taxes. Even in nations with high taxes, the government won't necessarily help citizens in disasters. Taxes are high to pay for other expenses
5. Where are the insurance companies. This should take one of three paths. Insurance companies refuse to pay claims, insurance companies pay claims but increase premiums, people without insurance didn't make the investment and are now expecting help from the government.

Options:
[option]"It's something you think could never happen to you," says @@RANDOMNAME@@. "One day I'm just minding my own business and all of a sudden this grapefruit sized piece of hail falls right down in front of me! Like everyone else around here, my house was destroyed! We really could use as much money and donations as possible; this truly is an emergency. Who cares if it raises the taxes that much, it's for @@NAME@@!"
[effect]the government helps when they want to in times of need
[stats]compassion increases, niceness increases, political apathy decreases, rudeness decreases, death rate decreases

[option]"Listen, I know we need to help," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your long time assistants. "But we simply don't have the means of providing what is needed. My idea is we just let them clean the mess up on their own, that way all citizens get to know what it's like to do backbreaking work for once in their life. It would totally be a good thing for them, right?"
[effect]the government could care less about their citizens during times of need
[stats]apathy increases significantly, death rate increases, rudeness increases, health decreases, youth rebelliousness decreases

[option]"We should just send donations over a extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew. "I'm all for conserving money, but I just simply can't bear watching these people suffer right now. The government should send donations possibly a few times every other week, this way we are still contributing without putting too much of a burden on @@NAME@@ or the taxes."
[effect]the government replaced it's most important positions with 5-year old know it all's
[stats]apathy increases, niceness increases slightly, corruption increases, tourism decreases[/quote][/quote]

[Tishanda]

Welcome to Got Issues!


1. Description- "As you should already know" it's not an issue if you know about the problem
2. Description- Change "This has caused" to "which involved"
3. Description- "Hit coastal areas" this sounds it hit the whole coast line. This isn't likely. For example, if you look at Greece, Thessaloniki and Kalamata are both coastal, but don't even have the same climate, much less the same weather. Becomes even more complicated when dealing with massive nations, such as the United States or Canada
4. I don't see why this needs to have low taxes. Even in nations with high taxes, the government won't necessarily help citizens in disasters. Taxes are high to pay for other expenses
5. Where are the insurance companies. This should take one of three paths. Insurance companies refuse to pay claims, insurance companies pay claims but increase premiums, people without insurance didn't make the investment and are now expecting help from the government.

Options:
[option]"It's something you think could never happen to you," says @@RANDOMNAME@@. "One day I'm just minding my own business and all of a sudden this grapefruit sized piece of hail falls right down in front of me! Like everyone else around here, my house was destroyed! We really could use as much money and donations as possible; this truly is an emergency. Who cares if it raises the taxes that much, it's for @@NAME@@!"
[effect]the government helps when they want to in times of need
[stats]compassion increases, niceness increases, political apathy decreases, rudeness decreases, death rate decreases

[option]"Listen, I know we need to help," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your long time assistants. "But we simply don't have the means of providing what is needed. My idea is we just let them clean the mess up on their own, that way all citizens get to know what it's like to do backbreaking work for once in their life. It would totally be a good thing for them, right?"
[effect]the government could care less about their citizens during times of need
[stats]apathy increases significantly, death rate increases, rudeness increases, health decreases, youth rebelliousness decreases

[option]"We should just send donations over a extended period of time," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your nephew. "I'm all for conserving money, but I just simply can't bear watching these people suffer right now. The government should send donations possibly a few times every other week, this way we are still contributing without putting too much of a burden on @@NAME@@ or the taxes."
[effect]the government replaced it's most important positions with 5-year old know it all's
[stats]apathy increases, niceness increases slightly, corruption increases, tourism decreases

Thanks for your input! I'll get to work on the draft again.

[Tishanda]

Updated the draft on the top post. I changed the validity to "Not valid for nations with good weather", seeing as nations with bad weather would be the ones to receive this issue. Now I'm not sure If I should keep this or not, or if I should consider adding anything else to it.

Also by the way thanks to everybody for being so helpful on this topic! I should post here more often.

[Australian rePublic]

Updated the draft on the top post. I changed the validity to "Not valid for nations with good weather", seeing as nations with bad weather would be the ones to receive this issue. Now I'm not sure If I should keep this or not, or if I should consider adding anything else to it.

Also by the way thanks to everybody for being so helpful on this topic! I should post here more often.

Not necasserily. "Good weather" is subjective. To a ski resort, good weather means plenty of snow, which could potentially mean blizzards. But let's assume that a tropical climate is your definition for "good weather", for 6 months they have the dry season which brings good weather, the other six months is the wet season, when cyclones, hurricanes and typhoons happen. These things only happen in the tropics and nowhere else. Also, storms are more likely to happen in warmer places than colder ones. The exception would be a rain forest, which has something like 320 days of rain, evenly distributed throughout the year