NATION

PASSWORD

Published: Stop training, says the coach

A place to spoil daily issues for those who haven't had them yet, snigger at typos, and discuss ideas for new ones.
User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Published: Stop training, says the coach

Postby Australian rePublic » Tue May 31, 2016 5:17 am

Current Draft:

Title: Stop Training And Start Coaching
Description: A feasibility study into railway lines in the Boondocks, the most remote part of @@NAME@@, has discovered that they are economically unsustainable, with some lines running 6-carriage trains with as few as 3 passengers. The feasibility study has suggested that these railway lines be shut down and replaced with coach services.
Validity: (Co-authored by Jutsa and Australian Republic) Nation must have: reasonable public transport spending; trains and automobiles(or at least coaches and trucks, but I imagine automobiles would be easier to code).

Option: "Whilst I understand that this is an unfortunate situation, we cannot maintain every single line," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, chief of the rail budget. "While coaches may offer somewhat slower travel, they are more well-suited for small towns with small populations, as they're smaller and can run directly into town, when rail lines may lay a few kilometers out. Even better is the fact that they're cheap and require far less maintenance. And when it comes to imports, trucks will, too, be more efficient than freight trains. Come on, @@LEADER@@; it's the only logical solution."
[effect]miles of abandoned and rusty rail networks can almost be made out from the windows of overcrowded coaches

Option: "Stupid, bloody townies!" screams a disgruntled, long-term resident of the Boondocks. "We live so far from everything that we need good and sturdy transport to get anywhere safely and comfortably, as well as import supplies we need and export enough to give us a profit. The government should build, maintain, and pay for rail connections to every place that has someone living in it. Darn the expenses, @@LEADER@@; do it for my children!"
[effect]the nation's longest railway line only serves two individuals who didn't even want it

Option: "Why should I have to pay for the travel of hermits who only want to interact with the outside world whenever it suits them?" protests @@RANDOMNAME@@, a disgruntled city taxpayer. "I don't see why rural people need public transport at all. If they choose to live isolated, then by all means they'll get what they're asking for. It's not like in the city, where we need public transport in order to get anywhere - even if we are closer to everything. Cut any and all government spending on public transport to rural communities, and let those people find their own way around."
[effect]rural communities are so isolated that they're rediscovered every couple of years



Title:
Stop Training, Says the Coach

Description:
As a cost-cutting method, the national government wishes to shut down a railway line in the Boondocks, the most remote and underpopulated part of @@NAME@@. The railway in question is one of the longest railway lines in the nation, and only serves 1500 people. The government wishes to replace it with a coach, (or luxury, long distance bus) service. This proposal has been met with controversy from locals, who wish to retain their railway line

Validity:
Must have state-owned enterprise, Must have public transport and roads, not valid for those who selected option 2 of issue 526

Options:
[option]"Whilst I understand that this is an unfortunate situation, our transport budget cannot afford to maintain every single railway line” says the national treasurer of transport, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Coaches may not be as comfortable as a train, and not to mention the lack of food, but we could enhance them. Additional leg room, on-board toilets, and you get my point"
[effect]3/4 of @@NAME@@’s railways are scheduled for demolition

[option]”Stupid bloody townies!” screams a disgruntled long-term resident of the Boondocks, from a town along the route in question “I wish one of you would spend a week in the country, so that you can actually know what you’re doing before making your dumb decisions. We live so far from everything that we need good transport to get-well-anywhere! We are so far from everything that comfort is our number one problem with transport. I wish that you city-slickers would understand what life is like for people in the country before going ahead and making stupid, harebrained decisions"
[effect]@@NAME@@’s longest railway line only serves two individuals

[option]"Why should I have to pay for the travel of hermits who only want to interact with the outside world whenever it suits them?” yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, a disgruntled city taxpayer, who is too stubborn to travel to the country. “The government should only pay for the travels of people who live in areas where there are enough tax payers to fund it. As for people who live in the middle of nowhere, that’s their own problem. Nobody is forcing them to live out in the Boondocks!”
[effect]According to most @@DENONYMPLURAL@@, rural roads are strange phenomena known only to those who travel to the most exotic parts of @@REGION@@

[option]”There is a way to fix everything” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the CEO of a well-know urban-planning firm. “We could build small villages along existing, popular rail corridors, and move people from the various parts of the Boondocks to them. These villages could have railway stations and a population cap. Trains which are serving more popular routes could stop along these new villages with very little extra cost. That way the rural residents could have their railways, and we wouldn’t pay through the nose for them. It would cost to initially set them up, but in the long run, there will be nothing but savings! I'm not even going to mention how much money my employees and shareholders, who are your potential voters, will receive from this project. Oh yea, and the fact that there will be more employment in the construction industry...”
[effect] The government is evicting more than 30% of @@DENONMPLURAL@@ out of their homes, against their will, in order to ensure trains are overcrowded

Title:
Stop Training, Says the Coach

Description:
As a cost-cutting method, the national government wishes to shut down a railway line, in the Boondocks, the most remote and underpopulated part of @@NAME@@. The railway in question is one of the longest railway lines in the nation, and only serves 1500 people. The government wishes to replace it with a coach, (or luxury, long distance bus) service. This proposal has been met with controversy from locals, who wish to retain their railway line

Validity:
Must have state-owned enterprise, Must have public transport and roads

Options:
[option]"Whilst I understand that this is an unfortunate situation, our transport budget cannot afford to maintain every single railway line” says the national treasurer of transport, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Coaches may not be as comfortable as a train, and not to mention the lack of food, but we could enhance them. Additional leg room, on-board toilets, and you get my point"
[effect]3/4 of @@NAME@@’s railways are scheduled for demolition

[option]”Stupid bloody townies!” screams a disgruntled long-term Boondocks resident, from a town along the route “I wish one of you would spend a week in the country, so that you can actually know what you’re doing before your making your dumb decisions. We live so far from everything that we need good transport to get-well, anywhere! We are so far from everything that comfort is our number problem with transport. I wish that you city-slickers would understand what life is like for people in the country before going ahead and making stupid, quick-fix decisions"
[effect]@@NAME@@’s longest railway line only serves two individuals

[option]"Why should I have to pay for the travel of hermits who only want to interact with the outside world whenever it suits them?” yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, a disgruntled city taxpayer, who is to stubborn to travel to the country. “The government should only pay for the travels of people who live in areas where there are enough tax payers to fund it. As for people who live in the middle of nowhere, that’s their own problem. Nobody is forcing them to live out in the Boondocks!”
[effect]According to most @@DENONYMPLURAL@@, rural roads are strange phenomena known only to those who travel to the most exotic parts of @@REGION@@


Title:
Stop Training, Says the Coach

Description:
As a cost-cutting method, the national government wishes to shut down a railway line, in the most remote and underpopulated part of @@NAME@@. The railway in question is one of the longest railway lines in the nation, and only serves 1500 people. The government wishes to replace it with a coach, (or luxury, long distance bus) service. This proposal has been met with controversy from locals, who wish to retain their railway line

Validity:
Must have state-owned enterprise, Must have public transport and roads

Options:
[option]"Whilst I understand that this is an unfortunate situation, our transport budget cannot afford to maintain every single railway line” says the national treasurer of transport, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Coaches may not be as comfortable as a train, and not to mention the lack of food, but we could enhance them. Additional leg room, on-board toilets, and you get my point"
[effect]3/4 of @@NAME@@’s railways are scheduled for demolition

[option]”Stupid bloody townies!” screams a disgruntled long-term resident of a town along the route “I wish one of you would spend a week in the country, so that you can actually know what you’re doing before making decisions. We live so far from everything that we need good transport to get-well, anywhere! We are so far from everything that comfort is our number problem with transport. I wish that you townies would understand what life is like for people in the country before going ahead and making stupid decisions without asking us
[effect]@@NAME@@’s longest railway line serves two individuals

[option]"Why should I have to pay for the travels of hermits who live in the middle of nowhere!” yells a stubborn, disgruntled tax payer, @@RANDOMNAME@@, who has never travelled outside of @@CAPITAL@@. I say cut all transport until there are enough tax payers in one area to pay for it themselves, and use the transport money for people who pay for it. If they want to live out in Boondocks, and only to interact with outside world when it suits them, that's their problem. Not ours”
[effect]According to most @@DENONYMPLURAL@@, rural roads are strange phenomena known only to those who travel to the most exotic parts of @@REGION@@

Title:
Stop Training, Says the Coach

Description:
As a cost-cutting method, the national government wishes to shut down a railway line, in the most remote and underpopulated part of @@NAME@@. The railway in question is one of the longest railway lines in the nation, and only serves 1500 people. The government wishes to replace it with a coach, (or luxury, long distance bus) service. This proposal has been met with controversy from locals, who wish to retain their railway line

Validity:
Must have state-owned enterprise, Must have public transport and roads

Options:
[option]"Our transport budget cannot afford to maintain every single railway line” says the national treasurer of transport, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Coaches may not be as comfortable as a train, and not to mention the lack of food, but we could enhance them. Extra leg room, on-board toilets, and you get my point"
[effect]3/4 of @@NAME@@’s railways are scheduled for demolition

[option]"Don’t take our trains away” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a long term resident of a town along the route which is scheduled for demolition “Trains are the most comfortable way for us to travel-well-anywhere, and a coach service cannot meet the standards of a train. I wish that you townies would understand that we are so far from everything that comfort is our biggest problem. There is nothing more comfortable than a train. We need to maintain our regional railways"
[effect]@@NAME@@’s longest railway line serves two individuals

[option]"If you want to live out in the middle of nowhere, why should we pay for you to travel anywhere?” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a disgruntled tax payer from @@NAME@@’s largest city. If you wish to live in the middle of nowhere and act like a hermit, why should the government have to pay for your travels? I say cut the train and the coach service, and stop wasting the rest of our money”
[effect]According to most @@DENONYMPLURAL@@, rural roads are strange phenomena known only to those who travel to the most exotic parts of @@REGION@@

Title:
Stop Training, Says the Coach

Description:
In a cost-cutting method, the national government wishes to shut down a railway line in the @@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials, the most remote part of @@NAME@@, which is one of the longest railway lines in @@NAME@@, and only serves 1500 people, and replace it with a coach service. This has proposal has met with controversy from locals, who wish to retain their railway line

Validity:
Must have state-owned enterprise

Options:
[option]"We can’t afford to maintain all of our rural railways” says the national transport treasurer @@RANDOMNAME@@, and if we were to keep within our transport budget, no matter how unfortunate, we have to shut down our rural railway lines and replace them with coach services”
[effect]3/4 of @@NAME@@’s railways are schedualed for demolition

[option]"With all due respect, @@LEADER@@, we can’t have some townie making decisions for us” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a long term resident of the @@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials “Trains are the most comfortable way for us to travel-well anywhere, and a coach service cannot meet the standards of a train. Don’t we deserve good transport?”
[effect]@@NAME@@’s longest railway line serves two persons

[option]"If you want to live out in @@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials, why should we pay for you to travel anywhere?” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a disgruntled tax payer from the city “If you wish to live in the middle of nowhere and act like a hermit, why should the government have to pay for your travels? I say cut the train and the coach service, and stop wasting the rest of our money”
[effect]According to most @@DENONYMPLURAL@@, rural roads are strange phenomena known only to those who travel to the most exotic parts of @@REGION@@
Last edited by Australian rePublic on Sat Feb 10, 2018 3:39 am, edited 40 times in total.
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Trotterdam
Powerbroker
 
Posts: 9169
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Tue May 31, 2016 12:55 pm

What is a "coach", and what are its advantages and disadvantages? Why is it easier than a rail line?

The last time I recall seeing the word "coach" as a means of transportation, it was referring to horse-drawn carriages (which, granted, would be perfectly appropiate in my nation). Nowadays we have trains, busses, taxis, and so on, but I don't remember anything called a "coach". Maybe this is a dialectal difference.

Also, "@@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials" (I assume you mean "@@NAMEINITIALS@@isials", since that isn't a listed macro) is very easily going to produce nonsensical results as a place name. Think "ARisials", what kind of place name starts with multiple capital letters and then has a generic suffix like that? Even for single-word nations, depending on the letter, it could produce questionably-pronouncable stuff.

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Tue May 31, 2016 4:10 pm

Trotterdam wrote:What is a "coach", and what are its advantages and disadvantages? Why is it easier than a rail line?

The last time I recall seeing the word "coach" as a means of transportation, it was referring to horse-drawn carriages (which, granted, would be perfectly appropiate in my nation). Nowadays we have trains, busses, taxis, and so on, but I don't remember anything called a "coach". Maybe this is a dialectal difference.

A coach is a luxury bus especially built for long distance. In almost all English speaking nations, they are called coaches, and not buses. More luxurious than a bus, sometimes (but not always) they have on board toilets. No where near as luxuriousas, or comfortable, as a train

Image
Image

Also, "@@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials" (I assume you mean "@@NAMEINITIALS@@isials", since that isn't a listed macro) is very easily going to produce nonsensical results as a place name. Think "ARisials", what kind of place name starts with multiple capital letters and then has a generic suffix like that? Even for single-word nations, depending on the letter, it could produce questionably-pronouncable stuff.

Suggestions?
Last edited by Australian rePublic on Tue May 31, 2016 4:15 pm, edited 3 times in total.
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Wed Jun 01, 2016 3:43 am

Where's an issue nitpicker when you need one
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Thu Jun 02, 2016 6:57 pm

bump
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Katalaysia
Envoy
 
Posts: 232
Founded: Sep 18, 2015
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Katalaysia » Fri Jun 03, 2016 5:15 am

Australian Republic wrote:First Draft:
Title:
Stop Training, Says the Coach

Description:
As a cost-cutting method, the national government wishes to shut down a railway line in the @@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials, the most remote part of @@NAME@@, which is one of the longest railway lines in @@NAME@@ and only serves 1500 people, instead replacing it with a coach service. This proposal has been met with controversy from locals, who wish to retain their railway line

Validity:
Must have state-owned enterprise, Must have public transport and roads

Options:
[option]"We can’t afford to maintain all of our rural railways” says the national transport treasurer @@RANDOMNAME@@, and if we are to keep within our transport budget, no matter how unfortunate, we have to shut down our rural railway lines and replace them with coach services” Maybe include an accidental mention of a larger disadvantage?
[effect]3/4 of @@NAME@@’s railways are scheduled for demolition

[option]"With all due respect, @@LEADER@@, we can’t have some townie making decisions for us” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a long term resident of the @@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials “Trains are the most comfortable way for us to travel-well anywhere, and a coach service cannot meet the standards of a train. Don’t we deserve good transport?”
[effect]@@NAME@@’s longest railway line serves two people

[option]"If you want to live out in @@NATIONALINITIAL@@isials, why should we pay for you to travel anywhere?” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a disgruntled tax payer from the city “If you wish to live in the middle of nowhere and act like a hermit, why should the government have to pay for your travels? I say cut the train and the coach service, and stop wasting the rest of our money”
[effect]According to most @@DENONYMPLURAL@@, rural roads are strange phenomena known only to those who travel to the most exotic parts of @@REGION@@


It might be good to have more varying speech patterns between the three different people, as they seem to all be talking rather similarly at the moment. Also, you may want to add what they're doing whilst making these points, just to add flavour to the issue and make them seem less identical to each other. You could also do with replacing the @@INITIAL@@ism with something more generic, like the rural borders of @@NAME@@
Last edited by Katalaysia on Fri Jun 03, 2016 5:16 am, edited 1 time in total.
Uses Nationstates Stats, except for population. Assume around 100,000-120,000 people.
Slight PMT. Uses forcefields and slightly more advanced robots, but otherwise MT.
Please inform me if I make any mistakes! I'm quite new to this, and don't really follow politics otherwise, so any help is appreciated!
Author of "Shh, Spoilers!" and "Plug In and Play"

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Fri Jun 03, 2016 6:02 pm

Fixed
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Great Feng
Senator
 
Posts: 4319
Founded: Dec 08, 2015
Ex-Nation

Postby Great Feng » Fri Jun 03, 2016 6:05 pm

clever pun.

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Fri Jun 03, 2016 6:06 pm

Great Feng wrote:clever pun.

Thanks!
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Sun Jun 05, 2016 5:09 am

Seeing how this issue has not been replied to whilst others have, should I assume that it's ready for submission? (Especially with the number of views it's had). Please reply with an answer
Last edited by Australian rePublic on Sun Jun 05, 2016 5:15 am, edited 2 times in total.
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Katalaysia
Envoy
 
Posts: 232
Founded: Sep 18, 2015
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Katalaysia » Sun Jun 05, 2016 7:08 am

There's punctuation missing inside the speech tags, so you'll need to add that.

Also, like I previously mentioned, it still feels like the people from each option don't really have a distinctive voice, and you've not really said what they're doing whilst making their points. It's just extra detail, but it would make the issue more interesting.
Uses Nationstates Stats, except for population. Assume around 100,000-120,000 people.
Slight PMT. Uses forcefields and slightly more advanced robots, but otherwise MT.
Please inform me if I make any mistakes! I'm quite new to this, and don't really follow politics otherwise, so any help is appreciated!
Author of "Shh, Spoilers!" and "Plug In and Play"

User avatar
Candlewhisper Archive
Senior Issues Editor
 
Posts: 22284
Founded: Aug 28, 2015
Anarchy

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Mon Jun 06, 2016 9:56 am

Trotterdam wrote:The last time I recall seeing the word "coach" as a means of transportation, it was referring to horse-drawn carriages (which, granted, would be perfectly appropiate in my nation). Nowadays we have trains, busses, taxis, and so on, but I don't remember anything called a "coach". Maybe this is a dialectal difference.


Just at a tangent, where you from? Curious to know which country/region doesn't use this word, for my own education.
editors like linguistic ambiguity more than most people

User avatar
Trotterdam
Powerbroker
 
Posts: 9169
Founded: Jan 12, 2012
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Trotterdam » Mon Jun 06, 2016 12:43 pm

It may be more that I live in the city and so am not familiar with how people get around out in the boondocks :)

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Mon Jun 06, 2016 4:14 pm

Trotterdam wrote:It may be more that I live in the city and so am not familiar with how people get around out in the boondocks :)

You have never travelled regionally?
I come from the city and ride coaches all the time. Both in the city, and in the country
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Mon Jun 06, 2016 4:16 pm

Katalaysia wrote:There's punctuation missing inside the speech tags, so you'll need to add that.

Also, like I previously mentioned, it still feels like the people from each option don't really have a distinctive voice, and you've not really said what they're doing whilst making their points. It's just extra detail, but it would make the issue more interesting.

I tried to vary the speech pattern. I will re-evaluate it and fix everything
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Gnejs
Issues Editor
 
Posts: 2707
Founded: May 11, 2006
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Gnejs » Mon Jun 06, 2016 10:30 pm

Trotterdam wrote:boondocks :)

Now there's a funny word. You - the author - should use that in your draft.

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Mon Jun 06, 2016 10:52 pm

Gnejs wrote:
Trotterdam wrote:boondocks :)

Now there's a funny word. You - the author - should use that in your draft.

Right. Back to the structure of my first draft :)
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
G-Max
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 121
Founded: Aug 03, 2006
Ex-Nation

Postby G-Max » Mon Jun 06, 2016 11:27 pm

- Is this area called "Boondocks" or "Boomdocks"? You spelled it both ways.
- You need an option for "privatize the rail". Something where the free market, rather than government, decides the success or failure of the rail.
- Resettling the Boomdockians to a more convenient location should be an option

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Mon Jun 06, 2016 11:32 pm

G-Max wrote:- Is this area called "Boondocks" or "Boomdocks"? You spelled it both ways.
- You need an option for "privatize the rail". Something where the free market, rather than government, decides the success or failure of the rail.
- Resettling the Boomdockians to a more convenient location should be an option

Yea, I'll fix the Boomdocks part. It goes without saying that the private sector doesn't want them, because they are not profitable. I also tried to imply that they should move themselves, but I suppose I could add something about the government resetteling them. Thanks for that!
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Tue Jun 07, 2016 12:02 am

G-Max wrote:- Is this area called "Boondocks" or "Boomdocks"? You spelled it both ways.
- You need an option for "privatize the rail". Something where the free market, rather than government, decides the success or failure of the rail.
- Resettling the Boomdockians to a more convenient location should be an option

Done
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Tue Jun 07, 2016 12:18 am

If someone can help me make the effect for option 4 more concise, it would be much appreciated
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Katalaysia
Envoy
 
Posts: 232
Founded: Sep 18, 2015
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Katalaysia » Tue Jun 07, 2016 10:13 am

"comfort is our number one problem"

"who is too stubborn to travel to the country"

Just a couple of nitpicks.
Uses Nationstates Stats, except for population. Assume around 100,000-120,000 people.
Slight PMT. Uses forcefields and slightly more advanced robots, but otherwise MT.
Please inform me if I make any mistakes! I'm quite new to this, and don't really follow politics otherwise, so any help is appreciated!
Author of "Shh, Spoilers!" and "Plug In and Play"

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Tue Jun 07, 2016 4:48 pm

Katalaysia wrote:"comfort is our number one problem"

"who is too stubborn to travel to the country"

Just a couple of nitpicks.

Fixed. Thank You!
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 21768
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Australian rePublic » Wed Jun 08, 2016 4:03 am

Is it suitable for submission?
RE: Potential Cancellation of Tokyo Olympics. The only reason why countries bid to host the Olympics is for tourism. This is why countries are planning on boycotting the Beijing winter Olympics. By cancelling the 2020/21 Olympics, Japan is defacto recieving the same punishment as China, Japan did nothing wrong since World War II
Until if and when the Spanish language evolves to allow for gender-neutrality to not be totally, utterly and completely impossible, (which will take at least centuries), the concept of "LatinX" is completely ridiculous
From Greek Ansestry Orthodox Christian
18 Published Issues and 1 WA Resolution List of NPC Nations
In-Character posts made by this fictious account do not reflect the actions of any real world government

User avatar
Candlewhisper Archive
Senior Issues Editor
 
Posts: 22284
Founded: Aug 28, 2015
Anarchy

Postby Candlewhisper Archive » Wed Jun 08, 2016 5:31 am

Boondocks is indeed a funny word, but I think you should make sure you get the usage right. Generally its "the boondocks" rather than "Boondocks".

My other worry here is that I am currently in the process of editing an issue about connections to remote rural areas. That could make your issue redundant. Please sit tight for a little bit till its published, then you can see if you need to adjust your issue.
editors like linguistic ambiguity more than most people

Next

Advertisement

Remove ads

Return to Got Issues?

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users

Advertisement

Remove ads