[SUBMITTED] - Doomsday: Fact or Fraud?

[Nation of Quebec]

This is an idea I've had for a while given the 2012 hype. As always I appreciate your suggestions and constructive criticism.

Title: Aprofitcalypse Now?

Description: The world is set to end in exactly one year from today, according to popular tabloid magazines, who have been backing up their claims with ancient texts from the cryptic Maxan civilization. Companies are already flocking to sell doomsday shelters to believers. However, skeptics are convinced that these companies are little more than corporate fraudsters.

Validity: Valid for nations with a population of more than one billion

[options]"The Maxans have made correct predictions before like the discovery of electricity," notes @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of Continuity Corporation, the company made famous for selling 'zombie survival kits' during times of war. "The world will end in exactly one year from now and our underground shelters are the best way to ensure that @@NAME@@ will survive the apocalypse. At least those with big enough wallets. I urge the government to help out with construction and funding. We'd be more than willing to have a shelter with your name on it, @@LEADER@@."
[effect]@@LEADER@@ has reportedly spent millions of @@CURRENCY@@s on underground doomsday shelters to ensure the government's survival in the event of an apocalypse
[stats]economy falls, taxes increase slightly, spending on infrastructure increases significantly, quality of the environment increases slightly, corruption increases, apathy decreases, healthiest ranking decreases

[option]"I can't believe you're actually considering this nonsense!" exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, @@NAME@@'s most notorious lawyer from the law firm of Kirk and Khan. "Come on, are you really going to listen to these crooks and internet conspiracy nuts over proven scientific facts? What happens if everything continues as normal a year from now? Will Continuity's customers get their money back? I think not. These companies are only existing to profit off people's fear and gullibility! I strongly urge you to get tough on fraud to protect innocent people from being swindled by these con artists."
[effect]a record number of CEOs and executives have been charged with fraud for attempting to profit off a supposed apocalypse
[stats]corruption decreases, funding for law and order increases slightly, crime decreases slightly, economic freedoms decrease, economy decreases slightly

[option]"Dammit! How do these conspiracy nuts continue to discover our plans?" whispers a shady sunglasses-wearing individual standing in a dimly lit area of your office. "First they discovered our plans for Project Alpha along with the fake lunar landing videos and now this! These people are beginning to represent a huge security risk the more they find out and expose government secrets. I think its high time we start monitoring the internet in order to gather intel on what these hippies and anarchists are up to! If they have any secrets they threaten to expose, we'll launch a smear campaign against them. If that doesn't work then I will see to it personally that these people...disappear."
[effect]there has been a positive correlation between the number of missing persons cases and the number of unmarked black vans appearing in otherwise cheerful neighborhoods
[stats]political freedoms decrease significantly, civil rights decrease significantly, corruption increases significantly, deaths due to disappearances increase, spending for law and order increases, safest ranking decreases slightly, information technology industry increases slightly

[option]"Repent! The hour of the Rapture is nigh!" shouts fundamentalist Violetist leader @@RANDOMNAME@@, seen wearing nothing but a long white robe and a mitre with some very disturbing imagry. "We have studied our scripture carefully and end times will come next Monday! The almighty Violet will shake @@REGION@@ with a massive quake that will flood the world! The only way to save @@NAME@@ is for its government and people to repent for their sins! We must return to the ways of Violet if @@NAME@@ is to be spared from the Apocalypse! Repent, I say!"
[effect]@@NAME@@'s police forces are overlooking the recent spike in ritual @@ANIMAL@@ sacrifices in the hopes of preventing an apocalypse
[stats]civil rights decrease, most godforsaken ranking decreases significantly, spending on religion and spirituality increase significantly, corruption increases slightly

[Nuew]

It's good. Real good. However, you need to add million after @@pop.

[Aescentia]

I agree, this is an excellently written issue.

Upon re-reading (the copyediting side of me), I can only find one issue. The ellipsis in number five, there should be a space after it and before the next word.

[Nation of Quebec]

Thanks for the compliments.

@Nuew. I'm not quite sure what you're getting at.

@Awscentia. Change made. Thanks for pointing that out.

[Aescentia]

Niew means that there should be a modifier after your @@POPULATION@@ variable.

Unfortunately, he's wrong. The way it is is correct. (god, that syntax gives me an aneurysm)

"The population of Aescentia is @@POPULATION@@" is this:

"The population of Aescentia is 3 billion" (or whatever it is )

[Free Irish Lands]

You got a short version of it?

[Phonencia]

I didn't know my Ex-Delegate wrote issues!
good job, this looks pretty good, cept for one thing. the last option doesn't seem to have hardly ANY good effects. it seems a lil unbalanced.

[Mostly armless]

I like it but you've got 'an' instead of 'a' on the effect line of the 2nd choice. Also 'its' should be 'it's' in the last option.

[Aescentia]

I like it but you've got 'an' instead of 'a' on the effect line of the 2nd choice. Also 'its' should be 'it's' in the last option.

Good catch, but the spelling/grammar doesn't matter so badly in the effect line.

[Nation of Quebec]

@Aescentia. You're right about the population field.

@Irish Lands. This is no longer than other new issues. Issues with more options do tend to be a little more complex and have more meat in them so to speak.

@Phonencia. I've been drafting issues for a while now and this is what I dedicate most of my time on NS towards since I stepped down. I would also like to add a few positive stat changes and I welcome any suggestions anybody has.

@Armless. Good catch. Mistake corrected.

[Nation of Quebec]

I hate to have to bump this thread, but I've added a new option and would appreciate any feedback others may have.

[Aescentia]

Sounds good, but it should be 'return TO the ways...' rather than what's there.

[Nation of Quebec]

Sounds good, but it should be 'return TO the ways...' rather than what's there.

Good catch. I can't believe I missed something as simple as that.

[Aescentia]

Also (I didn't see this earlier) this: "...Violetist leader @@RANDOMNAME@@, seen wearing nothing..." There needs to be a comma.

[Nation of Quebec]

Thanks again for pointing out a mistake I missed. Pending any other mistakes, I'm also ready to submit this issue.

[Zwangzug]

Just curious but why the validity cutoff? Is it so the overpopulation thing makes sense? Or so that new players don't get freaked out about the end of the world?

[Nation of Quebec]

Just curious but why the validity cutoff? Is it so the overpopulation thing makes sense? Or so that new players don't get freaked out about the end of the world?

Both, actually. I wanted this issue to touch upon overpopulation, which is something I've always wanted to tackle as an issue, and decided to incorporate it with this one. I figured that nations with a population of over 1 billion would have more legitimate reasons to be concerned with overpopulation than a new nation with whatever the starter population is.

Newer users would be more likely to be freaked out by an issue about an apocalypse and might think it means that they somehow lose their nation.

This is mainly based on the 2012 phenomenon and partly on the May 21st Rapture that never happened.

[Zwangzug]

Fair enough. I feel like the options sort of migrate away from apocalypse stuff and begin to overlap with issues 68 and 256, but all in all it's still a decent issue.

[Nation of Quebec]

Good point. I've actually decided to remove those two options so the issue is now more focused on apocalypse stuff. Hopefully I can work those other options into a potential new issue.

[Zwangzug]

Cool, I think it's a better issue now (and I wouldn't mind seeing the other options in another issue, either).

"a lawyer so notorious that he once sued a fast food chain because he thought two onion rings fused together bore an uncanny resemblance to their rival's logo" seems unnecessarily long, not to mention gender-specifying is kind of risky in this game. I think "a notorious lawyer" would be fine. Unless it's an allusion to something specific...? Anyway, you could also go with something like "from the law firm of Dewey, Cheatham, and Howe."

Title could also be something like "Apocalypse Now?"

[Nation of Quebec]

Made some changes including the title. You know, finding a good title is the hardest thing about writing issues. Sometimes I try and have them reference pop culture, make them witty, or just clearly state what the issue is about. Let me know if you like this new one.

[Zwangzug]

Doesn't exactly roll off the tongue, but it's cool. Coming up with titles is in general very difficult for me (not just issues) so I know what you mean.

[Aescentia]

Yeah, this is a bit of a hard one for which to come up with a title.

Nice job, though.

[Panageadom]

Right, it's been a while since I tried this; but...

This is an idea I've had for a while given the 2012 hype. As always I appreciate your suggestions and constructive criticism.

Title: Aprofitcalypse Now? I can't stop giggling...

Description: The world is coming to an end according to the ancient Maxian civilization and several tabloid magazines tabloids =/= newspapers across @@NAME@@ For some reason, the reported speech sounds slightly odd, probably because of the conjuction. I *might* reccomend changing this to something like The world is coming to an end, according to leading tabloid newspapers, who have been backing up their claims with occult evidence garnered from the ruins of the Maxian civilisation. . Companies are flocking to sell shelters to convinced believers quaking in their boots while skeptics are convinced that these companies are little more than shady con artists I know I'm a hypocrite, but this sentence seems a little long. I'd break it into two: "However, skeptics are...".

Validity: Valid for nations with a population of more than one billion Any reason? Or just elitism?

[options]"The Maxans have never been wrong about predictions before like that asteroid that hit Northern @@NAME@@ a few years ago Um. I'd convert this into a humourous statement about some over-interpreted prophecy that pretty much had to come true (e.g. astrology, Nostradamus' prophecies), but can't think of one myself. ," notes @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of Continuity Corporation Although it is quite obvious, remember that you haven't yet told us what Continuity does. . "The world will end in exactly one year from now and our underground shelters are the best way to ensure that @@NAME@@ will survive the Apocalypse Might be a New World thing, but apocalypse doesn't need a capital. . At least those with big enough wallets. I urge the government to help out with construction and funding. We'd be more than willing to make sure that there's a shelter with your name on it, @@LEADER@@. Besides, if people are gullible Doesn't stand well with the rest of the argument: by all means add the "it's your money" argument, but don't say it's because people are stupid, given that the assertion has been that they're smart enough to buy the bunkers in the face of apocalypse. enough to buy things like volcano insurance then what business is it of the government to tell them what they can spend their hard-earned @@CURRENCY@@s on?"
[effect]@@LEADER@@ has reportedly spent millions of @@CURRENCY@@s on underground doomsday shelters to ensure the government's survival in the event of an apocalypse
[stats]economy falls, taxes increase slightly, spending on infrastructure increases significantly, quality of the environment increases slightly Maybe , corruption increases, apathy decreases, healthiest ranking decreases

[option]"I can't believe you're actually considering this nonsense!" exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, @@NAME@@'s most notorious lawyer from the law firm of Kirk and Khan Reference - don't get it. . "There is no scientific basis for the world coming to an end ( - and, hey, I'm a lawyer, I should know!) I don't reccomend that you put it in, but it leaps out at me that this guy really doesn't have much of a backing to claim that the world isn't going to end (beyond common sense) . Are you really going to listen to these crooks and internet conspiracy nuts over proven scientific facts? What happens if everything continues as normal a year from now? Will Continuity's customers get their money back? I think not. These companies are only existing to profit off people's fear and gullibility! I strongly urge you to get tough on fraud to protect innocent people from being swindled by these con artists."
[effect]a record number of CEOs and executives have been charged with fraud for attempting to profit off a supposed apocalypse
[stats]corruption decreases, funding for law and order increases slightly, crime decreases slightly Arguably, no crime took place, but you've forced the market underground, thus creating crime. But I'm playing devil's advocate. , economic freedoms decrease, economy decreases slightly A utilitarian at work here, I see...Jolly good show. Mill would be proud.

[option]"Dammit! How do these conspiracy nuts continue to discover our plans?" whispers a shady sunglasses-wearing individual standing in a dimly lit area of your office. "First they found out about that secret military base in Southern @@NAME@@ and now this Good idea, not great writing. "secret military base in Southern @@NAME@@" doesn't really roll off the tongue. Either make it a more popular reference (e.g. something to do with Roswell, some recent popular/cult sci-fi film, something) or something to clearly ridiculous it would have to be a secret military project (Operation Blue Rogue Pastry!/the psychoanalytical terrier tests) ! These people are beginning to represent a huge security risk the more they find out and expose government secrets. I think it's high time we start monitoring the internet in order to gather intel on what these hippies and anarchists are up to! If they have any secrets they threaten to expose, we'll launch a smear campaign against them. If that doesn't work then I will see to it personally that these people...disappear."
[effect]there has been a positive correlation between the number of missing persons cases and the number of unmarked black vans appearing in otherwise cheerful neighborhoods
[stats]political freedoms decrease significantly, civil rights decrease significantly, corruption increases significantly, deaths due to disappearances increase, spending for law and order increases, safest ranking decreases slightly, information technology industry increases slightly Presumably it would decrease from all the bloggers getting hauled off, if anything? , Any good news?

[option]"Repent! The hour of the Rapture is nigh!" shouts fundamentalist Violetist leader @@RANDOMNAME@@, seen wearing nothing but a long white robe and a funny hat (It's called a mitre, you know. ) . "We have studied our scripture carefully and end times will come within the next few weeks "will end...next Wednesday!" . The almighty Violet will shake @@REGION@@ with a massive quake that will flood the world! The only way to save @@NAME@@ is for its government and people to repent for their sins! We must return to the ways of Violet if @@NAME@@ is to be spared from the Apocalypse! Repent, I say!"
[effect]the government has adopted several Violetist-friendly policies in the hopes of avoiding the rapture More comic potential here, methinks. Something to do with animal sacrifices seems in order.
[stats]civil rights decrease, most godforsaken ranking decreases significantly, spending on religion and spirituality increase significantly, corruption increases slightly

[Nation of Quebec]

I've made some appropriate changes based on your suggestions. Hopefully it reads better now. This isn't one of my stronger issues, but it's one I've had fun with especially given the recent failed prediction of the Rapture on Saturday.