Goodbye NationStates

[Cormactopia Prime]

Be well, Xor. You'll always be missed and I'm sorry this happened to you.

[Southern Bellz]

Thank you for being brave and sharing your story here. I am sorry for all the pain and suffering that you had to go through.

[Queen Yuno]

I knew some of the story and it's been stressful about these types of harassment, it's insane. And you got one of the worst of it. You're one of my best mentors, friend, and the saddest thing about it is that I know (not exactly but exactly) what youre talking about, can relate to it, and often avoid bringing NS up due to bad OOC experiences. I wonder if the game can ever be changed when harassers get the boot.

[Destructive Government Economic System]

Please stay safe and good luck at whatever holds you in real-life.

[Vuori Kunin-Grrs]

Good luck out there. Stay strong, and pursue your goals!

[Consular]

[The Blaatschapen]

Take care

[Lugus Triune]

Take care, Xor. You really helped me out in the past, and if you ever want to chat, my door is open

[Zaolat]

I still miss our Skype shenanigans. Also, I'm still upset over Catholic. >_>

[Giovenith]

We don't know each other, but I am so sorry this happened to you, it's inexcusable. Shame on this man whoever he is.

You are clearly a bright, kind person who knows how to take care of themselves. Do whatever you need to do to heal from this. I'm sorry that you feel driven from this game, but your safety and well-being come first.

[Jar Wattinree]

Take care, wherever you go.

[RiderSyl]

I brought back this nation just to say goodbye

I <3 ya Ocelot mom

[Penguin Dictators]

Xoriet,

You may not know me well, and likewise...while I've certainly seen you around, I never got the chance to get to know you.

Nonetheless, I'm absolutely horrified that you had to go through such an ordeal. Nobody should ever have to suffer that much from a person, online or off. It disgusts me when people can be such a way to someone, and I can only imagine the effect that it has had on you.

I'm very glad that you're able to get some help so that you can take back control of your life and get some comfort in realizing that everything will eventually be alright again.

You're going to be missed here, but I will wish you only the best in your future. I truly hope that you can get back to the point where you can be truly happy...and to where that experience will be merely be a bad memory that makes you a stronger person because of it.

Stay safe, strong, and awesome.

[Aurum Raider]

Farewell, Xoriet, I wish a brighter future, and a long wonderful life for you!

[North East Somerset]

This isn't the kind of story I wanted to hear right now. It's immensely frustrating what you went through, and that you felt unable to seek support throughout these tribulations.

I hope others learn the hard lessons from your experiences though, because at the end of the day, there's nothing that we can do about the past now - we can only affect the future.

The hard lessons are the ones no wants to hear, perhaps they will be missed in this message, or drowned out in the background noise of sympathy, empathy, and even fear - of confronting these hard truths.

But you've said it now, so let me repeat it once more, so it isn't lost;

When you meet someone who tries to treat you this way.... Don’t do what I did, and stay quiet.... you don't deserve it. Take care of yourself.

That's the message people need to take from this, because if they don't, your suffering and the time you spent to write this is all a waste.

You will be of course be missed, and you have my best wishes for the future.

[Franceburg]

Farewell, Xoriet. Best wishes to you!

[McMasterdonia]

I echo what has been said by NES and others.

Very sad to hear what you went through Xoriet. Be well.

[Kalaron]

Hey Xor. We never talked -which kinda makes sense, I never post in NS Forums anyway and I'm not a raider or defender- but I'm really sorry to hear about what happened to you. As someone who has personally dealt with maybe more than my fair-share of trolls and manipulative arseholes (even down to someone who somehow got a hold of my last name IRL and made it into a nation) and with overwhelming feelings of guilt and unhappiness, I can empathize with feeling unsafe and unhappy because of something seemingly small breaching into your real life.

I'm sorry to hear that you're going away from NS, it seems from what the others are saying that you're a pretty swood-dood. I hope you find some happiness offline, I know that the road to being "OK" again can be a pretty long and winding one but I think that you can definitely get there, buddy. If you ever want to talk, and I mean ever I'm pretty much always going to be here on NS.

[The Iron Rebel]

Bye former questing buddy

[Aillyria]

Hey, I don't know you and I never post here, but my heart goes out to you. You learned the same hard reality I did as well, don't hang on to those that hurt you. People like that only care about themselves, you're only a possession to them not a living breathing person....just a thing for their pleasure.

I personally don't think you should leave NS, you have your friend here, your RP buddies, your NS family. But if you do ultimately leave, follow what you feel. Always trust your gut instincts.

I'll be praying for you tonight, I know all too well what you've been through. May Allah (swt) guide you and protect you on your path to recovery, take care sister.

[Ambrella]

Xor, we're going to do our level best to make sure no one else has to go through what you went through. Be well, and thank you for sharing.

[Trinnien]

Best wishes to you, Xor, I'm sad that I never really got to know you when I was active in foreign affairs, as Raven and Mouse always spoke very well of you.

[Harmoneia]

I'm sorry to hear this, Xoriet. I wish more could have been done. Take good care and I hope you heal from this sooner rather than later. You'll be missed.

[Guy]

I'm really sorry that any of this happened. You're doing an admirable thing by talking about it. I really hope that RL is going to fucking rock for you.

As others said, you have been (and will be) sorely missed. You were a fantastic player, but also just a great person.

Unfortunately, a sizeable portion of our conversations had to do with the topics of harassment and abuse on NS. Despite being subject to some horrific abuse yourself, you always approached those matters with an incredible amount of foresight, compassion and strength, always being concerned about making NS a safer place. Your efforts made a real difference.

[Cerillium]

Take good care of yourself, Xor. The positive ripples created during your NS tenure will continue to touch people long after you've walked away. Thank you for that. You carried a burden you did not deserve nor ask for. I'm sorry you had to live with it for so long.

Your experience is one we should all take to heart. It's a message that players hear routinely: Don't remain silent when harassed; reach out to peers when it happens, tell someone; don't give out personal information; trust your instinct; report it via GHR if it's happening on site. That's all well and good for keeping the trolls at bay. The manipulative, controlling bastards circumvent this by gaining your trust. This is how they're able to break you down. It happened to Xor. It's happened to others on NS. It will continue to happen until the community - regardless of the subforum we each haunt - ceases to tolerate manipulative and harassing behaviors. How many more Xors will we lose before we put aside our bullshit and unify on this matter? Considering how many have left, and the reasons behind it, perhaps it's time for us to earnestly and openly discuss what's going on (without finger-pointing) in order to explore options for curtailing it.

edit: forgot I was on my main. -Raz