The Roman Empire

[Kanglia]

Barbarian viciously assaults the Emperor after being shown that his family's murder was just a joke, except they're still dead

Fucking dead Great report guys, & good raiding too

[Revall]

yep Plog'd has become a thing in the TRE discord was wondering when it would show up in a raid report.

[Vincent Drake]

Just wanted to give TRE a shoutout for a very active week with blazing fast moves, full update stamina, and high production quality reports. Happy Thanksgiving guys!

[Plagentine]

"We came with our knives
Stabbed you in the back
Forever now you sleep
Even though you were the people's savior
Now the Republic is in danger
All Patricians want to rule over Rome

It's my own Empire
I'll take it by force
Help me to decide
Help me make the most of legions and of treasure
Nothing ever lasts forever
All Patricians want to rule over Rome

There's no room where their might won't find you
Throwing rocks until your walls come tumbling down
When they do, I'll be right behind you
Your hands, you won't need them
To the Rostra we'll just nail them
All Patricians want to rule over Rome

Caesar has made his decision
Working out the great vision
All Patricians want to rule over Rome

Say that you'll never, never, never, need it
One Empire, why seize it?
All Patricians want to rule over Rome

All my legions and my treasure
Nothing ever lasts forever
All Patricians want to rule over Rome"

Everybody:
Emperor Plagentine
Signifier Hired Contractor II
Legionary The supreme lord pageko

49 Worlds Ruled:
the assembly of the people
unitedempirecoalition
Evermore
the war room
United sovereign states of Orion
the alliance of true christians
right wing love squads
The Alliance of Gas Stations
NATO Not Another Trump Organisation
calusahatchi
swm alliance
the alliance of corporate super powers
Bates Motel
stumpt region
neon
the marxist leninist union
the confederation of creek nations
litnation
lions of liberty
malcolm in the middle
realm of inoffensiveness
Carlingford
Free Nations of Mobocracy
shadow nations
southern bavaria
the communist union of scandia
Tickle My Pickle
Assyria
new worlds
canceria
the grand community of nations
the city state of singapore
salonia
summer isles
The Central Empires
azerupt
Cuisine Region
kiwi confederacy
the region of nations
islands of solitude
dosai
allah
sumerian coalition
the imperial union of nations
freedom and liberty
the united states of alternative america
New Starland
Starfish Nation
Autonomous Independent Democratic States

Ave Roma!

[Plagentine]

Just wanted to give TRE a shoutout for a very active week with blazing fast moves, full update stamina, and high production quality reports. Happy Thanksgiving guys!

Thanks! You guys were pretty fast too and managed to jump in on some tighter triggers I thought weren't going to get intercepted. Enjoy the holiday

[Vulturret]

I'd love to echo what's been said lately. What TRE's doing is very impressive. Started with a fantastic base, and grew their region with an incredible speed. I just want to give them their well-earned props for hitting so many regions with few people and duuring the holiday week, no less. Again, what they're doing is super amazing, and it's something I wish I could replicate a little better with my own region... In due time, I guess. Anyways, props to TRE, and I hope everyone enjoyed the holiday.

[Plagentine]

One of the many propaganda images frequently displayed on the streets of Rome

The Romebot 9001 is a specialized combination of both newly created hardware and software, running purely on coffee and oatmeal which is deposited through the main hole on the face. This hole can also, on very rare occasions, be used for communicating with humans through articulation of sounds, but this feature has been heavily outdated due to lack of necessity.

The Romebot 9001 has also been gifted with a very unique form of artificial intelligence which has been programmed with the purpose of repeating a small pattern of short sword stabs and shield swipes over a period of forty to sixty minutes, while also being very accepting of the unbiased factual information provided to it by its owners(the state). The actual body of the robot is made of highly advanced Romeium,
a metal which has yet to be damaged by the weapons barbarians use, and is essentially a series of complex mechanisms and circuits linked together and directly connected to the super-processor located in its "head".


Declassified blueprints for the Romebot 9001

The bot is also extremely efficient at taking down barbarian "walls" and pillaging settlements, while using its algorithms to choose the best candidates for slavery. Since version 1.03 the robot also comes equipped with algorithms meant for building sewers, roads, and other Roman necessities, as well as the built-in tools required for the job. The most recent version, which is version 1.09, comes with a mean spaghetti maker, which is guaranteed to make the most delicious and spicy spaghetti you've eaten.

Though the Romebot 9001 is a very impressive piece of technology and is currently the backbone of the Roman military, there are plans to upgrade the next version with a senatorial and roleplaying chip which would increase the overall raid capacity that it has. Rumors from Microme are also saying that a possible ideological memory disk is going to be integrated within the processor of the Romebot 9001, but we still remain short of hard evidence to support those claims.

Robots:
Emperor Plagentine
Signifier Hired Contractor II
Signifier Byroms
Legionary The supreme lord pageko

38 Testing Facilities:
the united nations of ech
earthlings
authoritarian north
prodigyist
The Costelan Atlantic
coalition of independent united states
nuclear democracy
truly anarchy
acadian union
free lands of banana
the aulan nations
south east asia
Everything
great lakes
swishahouse
terra martialis
video gamers
a world
international confederation of nations
HOGOR
sili
circular quay
crazytown
Gionre Looc
kosovo
horizon islands
global markets
european economic union
Akharan Islands
redcarsealand
boingfing
concert of europe
eozarhia
imperial commission
rogue
snjduxhsbs
aynrandia goes it alone
god glory and conservatism

Ave Roma!

[Escade]

fun reports and ya'll are fast bois

[Mostly Benevolent Tyranny]

Where does one buy a Romebot 9001? I've been feeling the need for a new chef.

[Plagentine]

Where does one buy a Romebot 9001? I've been feeling the need for a new chef.

We deliver them to the customer's home in sets of entire legions, for the very very low price of your national independence and a sizable portion of the population.

[Mostly Benevolent Tyranny]

Where does one buy a Romebot 9001? I've been feeling the need for a new chef.

We deliver them to the customer's home in sets of entire legions, for the very very low price of your national independence and a sizable portion of the population.

Sounds like a lovely deal.

[Festavo the Enigma]

(Signifier Hired Contractor seducing a new and frightened Munifex to try the art of raiding.)

Oh don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on HC
I said you're holding back
He said shut up and raid with me
This region is my destiny
He said oh oh oh
Shut up and raid with me
We were victims of the night
The chemical, regional, kryptonite
Helpless to the update and the fading light
Oh we were bound to jump together
Bound to raid together
HC took my arm
I don't know how it happened
We took the floor and he said
Oh don't you dare look back
Just keep your eyes on me
I said you're holding back
He said shut up and raid with me
This region is my destiny
She said oh oh oh
Shut up and raid with me

A catchy tune and a disco ball made its way into Rome today and the weak peasants just couldn't resist. They hit the dance floor when they thought Emperor wasn't looking and got their freaky on. Turns out the Emperor is always watching because he has nothing else to do and he wasn't pleased by this blatant deviation from the pure and respectful culture of Rome so he sentenced 21 of the dancing peasants to death.

The Executioners:
Signifier Hired Contractor II
Signifier Asturias and Leon
Legionary The supreme lord pageko
With help from Cicero the Creative from The Galactic Order

The Deviant Dancers:
orkla
loxodonius
heck
swagtarctica
earth_sovereign_colonies
the_united_regions_of_southern_straya
conspiracy
the_kingdom_of_sahrailia
ulfhedweld
united_commonwealth_of_realms
nazi_syrup
new_fascist_regions
the_elysian_vale
right_wing_confederation
caringbah
followers_of_tachanka
aileron_apostasy
ebreon
shipley_school
the_liberal_and_academic_alliance
horikoshi

[Kanglia]

Dammit you've ruined another song for me ! Good update, great report again guys

[Scott VerinGuard]

Good job TRE!

[Revall]

dat report doe

[Escade]

lol shut up and dance and aww hope the emperor doesn't execute them, dancing teaches people to like update better

[Revall]

lol shut up and dance and aww hope the emperor doesn't execute them, dancing teaches people to like update better

Footloose themed raid report incoming

[Plagentine]

Dammit you've ruined another song for me ! Good update, great report again guys

If we don't make people think of the Emperor whenever they listen to their favorite band then society falls apart, so it's really a good thing

[Mostly Benevolent Tyranny]

Best musical choice yet! Now I've got it stuck in my head tho...

[Plagentine]

Hired Contractor going to fix the natives' aqueducts, by conquering them and building them from scratch

Roman Riders
Can we raid it?
Roman Riders
Yes, we can!

Plog, Fest and HC, and Revall too
Tali and Bunny just raided you
Thorn and the legion make the gauls run
Working together, they chased off the huns

Roman Riders
Can we raid it?
Roman Riders
Yes, we can!

Chelvo, Page and Leo marching through mud
Stabbing everywhere and spilling Spanish blood

Roman Riders
Can we raid it?
Roman Riders
Yes, we can!

Hey!
Time to get busy, such a lot to do
Building the baths, and sewers too
Conquering Britannia, it's so much fun
200,000 celts, of them survived none

Can we raid it? Yeah!
Can we tag it? Yeah!

Roman Riders
Can we raid it?
Roman Riders
Yes, we can

Builders:
Emperor Plagentine
Signifier Hired Contractor II

51 regions fixed:
Motherland Memes117
pandas
copelandian continental archipelago
our cozy asylum
communist land69
the lands of the east
Islands of the Moon States
the white islands
vegtibleland
sodor island
the union of commuria and alleghany
the third hegemony launch point
ridda
middle weastern council
mikagura
free nations that will not be controlled
United Confederacy
stumpt region
Aetheres Nivis
the new western union
Euernithe
the omens of lembar
Japanese pan asian co prosperity sphere
united nations of world domination
Novus Licentia Terra
spaojegrin empire
gey
societa di commercio occidentale
Western World
the american invaders
dominion of the phylakitai
Zombies
The Natanless Region
futurama
just bored
the federation of independent nations
me and ashton
nepots
robo hungarian states
newbia
allstars
Freedom industrial states of america
the inkwell lobby
Allah
William oats and andy price
the imperial consortium of nations
egalian econosphere
the glorious capitalist union
national dominoes
the gray wardens
New Exodus

Ave Roma!

Additionally, the following were promoted for their hard work:

Name: Pageko
Previous rank: Legionary
New rank: Signifier

Hail Signifier Pageko!!!

Name: Hired Contractor
Previous rank: Signifier
New rank: Decurion

Hail Decurion Hired Contractor!!!

[Solmarne]

Additionally, the following were promoted for their hard work:

Name: Pageko
Previous rank: Legionary
New rank: Signifier

Hail Signifier Pageko!!!

Name: Hired Contractor
Previous rank: Signifier
New rank: Decurion

Hail Decurion Hired Contractor!!![/quote]
Ah, the proud roman colors of...

The Ghana flag? Pretty colored ranks may have seemed like a great idea, but at the very least try and make them have something to do with Rome.

[Plagentine]

Additionally, the following were promoted for their hard work:

Name: Pageko
Previous rank: Legionary
New rank: Signifier

Hail Signifier Pageko!!!

Name: Hired Contractor
Previous rank: Signifier
New rank: Decurion

Hail Decurion Hired Contractor!!!

Ah, the proud roman colors of...

The Ghana flag? Pretty colored ranks may have seemed like a great idea, but at the very least try and make them have something to do with Rome.

Not sure what that means, especially considering ancient Rome was a very colorful place with various decorations on their buildings and streets. Would you have us make all of the ranks red and purple, or maybe add a marble gradient to the font

[Solmarne]

Ah, the proud roman colors of...

The Ghana flag? Pretty colored ranks may have seemed like a great idea, but at the very least try and make them have something to do with Rome.

Not sure what that means, especially considering ancient Rome was a very colorful place with various decorations on their buildings and streets. Would you have us make all of the ranks red and purple, or maybe add a marble gradient to the font

...
Actually, yeah, that seems pretty great

[Plagentine]

Hired Contractor yells at a long dead update

Glory! Triumph! Our most wise and merciful Emperor returns from being fucked in an exam and yet he still manages to write a beautiful report with exquisite details which speak directly to the reader's soul and paint magnificent images of epic battles and victory! Our brave legionaries have not only made a completely stunning show of force by capturing 21 cities which were previously thought unbreakable, but they've attended the rough and broken update for and estimated 30 minutes before dispersing due to both RL duties and being bored of waiting for targets to update longer than the Turks waited for Candia to fall. This beautiful report will continue for another two paragraphs, and will be filled with both meaning and substance. However, you are encouraged to not read the rest of the report, and instead just take my word for it.


...


No, really. You don't have to keep reading.


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There's definitely more to the report below, trust me. You don't have to read it.


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Troops involved:
Emperor Plagentine
Decurion Hired Contractor II
Signifier The supreme lord pageko

Regions civilized:
the regiontakers
kingdom of ireland
girbabylon
Petrov
the retirement home for bored ns players
the world united internationale
the new grand conservative alliance
azerupt
the confederation of liberation
the god fearing society
Chaeon
The Unified Nations of NUCA
amermercera
windham
galaea
time for britain 2 leave the eu
northwestern global alliance
the democratic union region
grand mitbro protectorate
rygach edd taeilain
central blessed trinity

Ave Roma!

[Roavin]

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