WELCOME TO THE NS WINTER OLYMPICS!Olympic ThemeAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND we're back after yet another wall of commercials! We have exciting results to report from tonight's figure skating events! TBH's short program ended in disaster as they fell in one jump after another. Unfortunately, they only had enough stamina to land one jump in the free tag, not nearly enough to skate by and make the podium. Many technical points were left on the table in a disappointing performance that wasn't even worth following by the second commercial break. It was a good training run, however, and we expect to see Team TBH back on the ice in 7 hours.
Nakari is not impressed... Then, TGW, SPSF, and TITO went 1-2-3 in the ski jump. Every athlete successfully got airborne for 13s and landed a huge jump. The sensation in the press box could only be described as "liberating" as one human after another shed their worldly limitations to take flight.
Next, we have the spectacular show in long track speed skating! In a truly grueling, nearly 50 minute set of races, TGW, SPSF, DKA, and TRE all qualified for the final with swift moves and motivated skaters, skaters who cross-endorsed each other to show unity. TRE racked up wins in the early races, but were chased furiously by experienced and skilled TGW skaters (with one lone SPSF qualifier straggling in the rear of the pack). Both TGW and TRE skaters picked up wins in the middle races. However, TRE stamina started to wear out in the final, with TGW across the line and TRE nowhere in sight.
Skatespawn wiping out after mis-timing their moves. Finally, complacent Athletes From Equilism, dominant for some 259 days, were knocked off the podium by TGW and SPSF in curling! TGW and SPSF's slow and careful approach swept away the entire field. Having failed to send an active team in the past year, Equilism only had inexperienced individuals competing, individuals who stood no chance in defending their title (again).
RIP WZEU. In other news, W&S made his triumphant return to the olympic stage after a long absence and immediately led in the first skate. Pyrosky also returned to competition, an athlete so elite that he could afford to lose track of his numbers. Switz was set to make an olympic debut for Team TGW, but unfortunately had to scratch right before the opening ceremony.
And now, we must leave you with yet another block of lame car commercials where the entire thing is computer-generated, commercials for drugs where the listing of side effects takes more than half of the commercial's run time, and whoever else is desperate enough to pay overinflated advertising rates that admittedly help pay my cousin's NBC salary, and he's becoming the face of the channel, so I put up with the ads, but ulgh. Did you know that you could save 15% or more on defense by switching to TGW?
Note to scary mods: I can spoiler tag the images if it's a problem. But, it's almost 5 AM and that's effort.