Declaration In Regard To Hippopotami
Category: Declaration | Type: Declare
The World Assembly,
Aware that the sizes of animal species do not differ considerably from each other in terms of the universal scale,
Also aware that the size of an animal in reality can be quite different depending on an individual's perception,
And believing that some nations' governments might be rendered senselessly flabbergasted by the assertion of certain species' sizes by an international legislative body despite said governments already having legislation regarding said species regardless of whether they reside in said nations' territories,
Hereby,
1. Reminds this organization's member-states that although Security Council Resolution #361, also called the "Declaration On Hippopotamuses", exists at the time of this resolution's passing, there is still room for more extant WA legislation regarding hippopotamuses (herein also referred to as "hippos" or "hippopotami");
2. Affirms that no true hippo is larger than life, especially that of the Pygmy Hippopotamus, and in fact is quite small in comparison to most things in life, such as mountains, planets, the universe, most battleships, or political egos;
3. Notes that hippos may be very friendly, particularly when they are young, a point in which they are consequently small even by most individuals' standards;
4. Informs all of this organization's member nations that, with a known minimum length of less than 5 feet, and a minimum weight of under 440.0 pounds, Hippos are not necessarily very large.
I only wrote this to see what happens. I couldn't find anything that technically makes this illegal (though I may be proven wrong),
and in theory this won't even cause complications if #361 miraculously were to get repealed on day. Feel free to roast this as hard as you can in the meantime.