[PASSED] Industrial Pollution Control Act

[Sakash]

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly;

AWARE that industrial growth may be essential for economic development, and one of the main sources of employment in many Member Nations,

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution may negatively impact a nation's environment and population,

WORRIED that unregulated pollution from industries disproportionately affect the poorest segments of society causing social injustice.

CONVINCED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution may have a detrimental effect on environmental health and public safety resulting in extreme hazard to the population of the nation.

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health,

ENCOURAGING Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly industry.

1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe for population or unable to sustain natural flora and fauna",

2. DEFINES "pollution" as chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in the environment or the health of a population,

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP) with the following duties:
i. To collect and publish annual reports on industrial pollution in Member Nations,
ii. To work with Member Nations to assess thresholds of environmental quality for their environments,
iii. To help Member Nations assess total economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution,
iv. To work with Member Nations to estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations' thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction,
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the Member Nations,
vi. To promote and encourage research and development to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, and improve pollution monitoring,

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP,
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor and ensure compliance with these policies,
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness about pollution control measures and technologies, and to encourage research and development efforts in reduction of pollution,
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with enforcement suitable to the Member Nation,
v. To establish policies that aim to prevent pollution from the nation's industries from causing harm in other nations,

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote energy conservation, carbon neutrality and landscaping efforts in and around industries where possible,

6. CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

Approvals: 64 (The United Workers Federation, Parti Ouvrier, Manchovia, Republic of Slovsko, Vandelstein, Raurosia, Gradyana, Marinar, Capisaria, Shaw State, Mikeswill, Applebania, Hess-Castle, Jingdood, Ivangard, Danitoria, Webus, ALMF, The Lorians, Saint Gorski, The Islands of Guacamole, Hicdarr, Kecoughtan Tribe, Empty Paradise, Great Zavi, Albrook, The Sons, Liberty Christians, MirrorGate, Prozo, Atlantica, Puerto Tyranus, The Derrak Quadrant, Felandos, Tel Mora, Penguino, Talorin, Segennea, Tasty Water, Tanou, Zandalari, Astibus, Trektopolis, Ventei, Awesomeness YoloSwag, Bunnvonberg, Conoga, Emberakkium, Nava Siam, Carenina, MDRunie, Le Cruise, Libraria and Ausitoria, Bad-Assistan, Astro-Tech corporation, The Recon Empire, Retired WerePenguins, New-Netherealm, The Ancient Republic of the Thunder, Galpamacrosse, KaiserAdolf, Emerald Cit-ay, Cyrenia, New Themyscira)

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly:

AWARE that industrial growth is essential for economic development and one of the main sources of employment in most member nations.

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution negatively impacts national populations.

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution has detrimental effect on public health and food safety resulting in net economic harm to the nation through hidden costs associated with environmental mismanagement.

CONVINCED that unregulated pollution from industries disproportionately affect the poorest segments of society causing social injustice.

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health.


1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" (for the purposes of this act) as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe for human use and/or unable to sustain natural wildlife."

2. ENCOURAGES Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly Industry.

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP) with the following duties:
i. To collect & publish annual WA-wide reports on nation wise statistics of industrial pollution.
ii. To work with member nations to assess thresholds of environmental quality for the environments of each member state.
iii. To help member nations assess economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution, this includes but not limited to health and environment mismanagement costs.
iv. To work with member nations and estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction in member states.
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the member nation.
vi. To promote and encourage R&D efforts to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, improve pollution monitoring and control.

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP.
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor & ensure compliance of Industry with these policies.
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness in Industry about pollution control measures & technologies. Also encourage R&D efforts in this direction.
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with punishments of adequate fines and/or incarceration.
v. To establish policies that ensure that pollution from nations industries does not cause harm in other nations.

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote landscaping & tree plantation efforts in and around Industries.

6. CLARIFIES that pollution includes chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in environment and / or health of population.

7. FURTHER CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

Note: This is Replacement Draft of earlier Pollution Control Act based on all the feedback received during the voting. Welcome all the comments & suggestions.

Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly:

AWARE that Industrial growth is essential for economic development and one of the main sources of employment in Member Nations.

CONCERNED that Common People are adversely affected by Pollution; and Industrial pollution is international issue with significant climate implications.

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, Industrial pollution is affecting common people’s health, clean water sources, food contamination & loss of income in some cases due to some irresponsible industries.

CONVINCED that unregulated pollution from Industries is causing social injustice by offering profits to Industry at the cost of more suffering of common people and environment.

DETERMINED to ensure that Industries are more environment friendly within the jurisdiction of Member Nations;

1. DEFINES "Pollution" (for the purposes of this Act) as: "Any Industrial waste, emissions & effluents which has potential to significantly damage environment and/or cause health problems for people living nearby resulting in economic loss to the nation"

2. DEFINES "Pollution Control" (for the purposes of this Act) as: "Creating & Maintaining proper facilities for emission monitoring, waste processing, effluent treatment & safe disposal to minimize pollution to safe limits"

3. REQUIRES that Member Nations monitor and publish national statistics on industrial pollution every year.

4. PROHIBITS Specific Industries/companies which do not have technology to reduce Pollution to safe limits.

5. ENCOURAGES Member Nations to promote Environment friendly Industry.

6. MANDATES

A. Creation of International Pollution Monitoring Commission (IPMC) with following responsibilities
i. To monitor & publish Industrial pollution levels of various Industry categories nation wise every Year.
ii. To establish safe pollution limits for Industry to prevent hazard to environment & common people living around such industry.
iii. To create awareness on better pollution monitoring and pollution control technologies among member nations.
iv. To promote and encourage R&D efforts to reduce Industrial pollution, safe disposal & recycling of such waste where possible.

B. Member Nations to establish National Pollution Control Authority with powers & funds to implement the following tasks.
i. To adapt IPMC safe pollution limits as far as possible and prescribe national safe pollution limits as required.
ii. To monitor & ensure compliance of Industry with safe pollution limits.
iii. To promote better pollution control & creating awareness in Industry about pollution control measures & technologies.
iv. To establish safe common waste disposal facilities where Industry cannot afford it.
v. To prescribe fines and enforce them on industries found in violation of this law.

7. CLARIFIES that this Act is applicable only to polluting Industries.

[Elke and Elba]

Let me be pedantic

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly:

AWARE that industrial growth is essential for economic development and one of the main sources of employment in most member nations.

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution negatively impacts national populations.

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution has detrimental effect on public health and food safety resulting in net economic harm to the nation through hidden costs associated with environmental mismanagement.

CONVINCED that unregulated pollution from industries disproportionately affect the poorest segments of society causing social injustice.

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health.


1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" (for the purposes of this act) as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe for human use and/or unable to sustain natural wildlife." Question: whichever is lesser, or whichever is more? Since the addition of and/or could make interpretation go either way.

2. ENCOURAGES Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly Industry. Not quite sure what an "environmentally-friendly Industry" means actually; given that you've asserted that this reso is to increase environment's quality at the expense of industry too :/ Are there such things as enivronmentally-friendly industries?

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP)(I'm not sure if there's such a program; if it hasn't been declared in past reso I think you need to dictate that WASP be created before tasking them with stuff) with the following duties:
i. To collect & publish annual WA-wide reports on nation wise statistics of industrial pollution.
ii. To work with member nations to assess thresholds (isn't it defined as above - I don't think there's any room of manipulation of the thresholds, seriously.) of environmental quality for the environments of each member state.
iii. To help member nations assess economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution, this includes but not limited to health and environment mismanagement costs.
iv. To work with member nations and estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction in member states.
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the member nation. (I'm not getting this - so you mean environment can take a back-seat when the country is in recession?)
vi. To promote and encourage R&D efforts to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, improve pollution monitoring and control. (It would probably be neater and easier to add a definition to "industrial pollution" and remove all the "etc." random stuff here)

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP. (Wow, here's the real bomb. Well then, what the use of using "encourage" in the previous paragraph then?)
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor & ensure compliance of Industry with these policies.
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness in Industry about pollution control measures & technologies. Also encourage R&D efforts in this direction.
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with punishments of adequate fines and/or incarceration. (Businesses could pay it off easily, just saying. Potential loophole.)
v. To establish policies that ensure that pollution from nations industries does not cause harm in other nations. (If any nation could ensure it... Then I see no reason why everyone is in the WA. You are signalling we are some deity-like figures who can ensure things don't fly across borders.)

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote landscaping (Well I'm not sure if this is enivronmentally-friendly or harmful...) & tree plantation efforts in and around Industries. (!!!! - WARNING - TREE GROWING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE IRONWORKS!!! )

6. CLARIFIES that pollution includes chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in environment and / or health of population. (That's why you need a definition for pollution, as mentioned above.)

7. FURTHER CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

Note: This is Replacement Draft of earlier Pollution Control Act based on all the feedback received during the voting. Welcome all the comments & suggestions.

Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly:

AWARE that Industrial growth is essential for economic development and one of the main sources of employment in Member Nations.

CONCERNED that Common People are adversely affected by Pollution; and Industrial pollution is international issue with significant climate implications.

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, Industrial pollution is affecting common people’s health, clean water sources, food contamination & loss of income in some cases due to some irresponsible industries.

CONVINCED that unregulated pollution from Industries is causing social injustice by offering profits to Industry at the cost of more suffering of common people and environment.

DETERMINED to ensure that Industries are more environment friendly within the jurisdiction of Member Nations;

1. DEFINES "Pollution" (for the purposes of this Act) as: "Any Industrial waste, emissions & effluents which has potential to significantly damage environment and/or cause health problems for people living nearby resulting in economic loss to the nation"

2. DEFINES "Pollution Control" (for the purposes of this Act) as: "Creating & Maintaining proper facilities for emission monitoring, waste processing, effluent treatment & safe disposal to minimize pollution to safe limits"

3. REQUIRES that Member Nations monitor and publish national statistics on industrial pollution every year.

4. PROHIBITS Specific Industries/companies which do not have technology to reduce Pollution to safe limits.

5. ENCOURAGES Member Nations to promote Environment friendly Industry.

6. MANDATES

A. Creation of International Pollution Monitoring Commission (IPMC) with following responsibilities
i. To monitor & publish Industrial pollution levels of various Industry categories nation wise every Year.
ii. To establish safe pollution limits for Industry to prevent hazard to environment & common people living around such industry.
iii. To create awareness on better pollution monitoring and pollution control technologies among member nations.
iv. To promote and encourage R&D efforts to reduce Industrial pollution, safe disposal & recycling of such waste where possible.

B. Member Nations to establish National Pollution Control Authority with powers & funds to implement the following tasks.
i. To adapt IPMC safe pollution limits as far as possible and prescribe national safe pollution limits as required.
ii. To monitor & ensure compliance of Industry with safe pollution limits.
iii. To promote better pollution control & creating awareness in Industry about pollution control measures & technologies.
iv. To establish safe common waste disposal facilities where Industry cannot afford it.
v. To prescribe fines and enforce them on industries found in violation of this law.

7. CLARIFIES that this Act is applicable only to polluting Industries.

[Rotwood]

It does look pretty good, Elke and Elba does raise some points though.

Elke and Elba: WASP seems to be an established WA agency that has been referenced in a number of resolutions and proposals

[Elke and Elba]

It does look pretty good, Elke and Elba does raise some points though.

Elke and Elba: WASP seems to be an established WA agency that has been referenced in a number of resolutions and proposals

Which is why I said "I had to check back on the other reso". Seems like it's fine, but for the proposal, it seems it can be articulated better :/

[Araraukar]

Seems like it's fine, but for the proposal, it seems it can be articulated better :/

Actually, since it's an existing committee, just naming it and giving it stuff to do is fine.

Sakash, I'll have a closer look at this soon, hopefully later today, but I need to run out of the door soon.

[Schalkania]

It is regrettable that the current pollution proposal will lose, we are sad. We will support the drafting of a new one. The world needs this to survive!

[Eireann Fae]

"We regret being unavailable to aid you in your previous effort, only having the time to make our comments and suggestions after your proposal had come to a vote. It is our intention now to rectify that by helping iron out the problems we have with this effort, in the hopes that we can get a solid resolution on the books in this matter. As I indicated earlier, the Community of Eireann Fae is dedicated to protecting the environment, and will do whatever we can to help produce a good resolution in this vein."

Rowan passes the Sakashi Ambassador a pair of documents, one with numerous editor's marks and the other a 'final draft' with the edits in place. "Our suggestions, Ambassador. We hope they serve you well."

Legend:
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Comments

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly:;
This is more a stylistic concern than a real problem with the legislation, but I prefer the 'run-on sentence' paradigm for drafting legislation. As such, I have changed the terminal punctuation here to a semi-colon, and replaced the periods at the end of subsequent clauses with commas. Feel free to ignore this recommendation; it is just a light suggestion.

AWARE that industrial growth is may be essential for economic development, and one of the main sources of employment in most many mMember nNations.,
Softer language really ought to be used here. Industrial growth is not a base necessity for economic development, and not even necessarily a primary source of employment in most nations. A good statement in general, but overreaches a bit for our taste.

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution may negatively impacts national populations a nation's environment and population.,
Pollution does, after all, effect more than the 'population' of a nation, and we feel it is important to stress the environmental effects of such pollution as well as its effect on people.

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution has may have a detrimental effect on public environmental health and food public safety resulting in net economic harm to the nation through hidden costs associated with environmental mismanagement.,
Again, softening the language a bit with that first edit. Also, again, bringing focus to harm on the environment and not just the people that live in it. We are also completely unconcerned with the financial drawbacks of pollution, and would rather see such practices reigned in for the sake of said environment and public health rather than to save a few dollars.

CONVINCED that unregulated pollution from industries disproportionately affect the poorest segments of society causing social injustice.
We are not so convinced. Pollution is a problem for everybody, not merely the poor and disenfranchised. This clause may be stricken entirely, in our opinion.

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health.,
Note that this is one of the very few instances where we do not mind the inclusion of financial concerns. Aside from the terminal punctuation, we would not wish to change this line at all.

ENCOURAGING Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly industry.
Note that we are simply moving a clause up a line, as we feel it works better in the preamble rather than in the active clause area. It is an encouragement, not a mandate, so there is no reason to not have it up here.

1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" (for the purposes of this act) as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe for human use and/or unable to sustain natural flora and faunawildlife.",
I would leave the term available for future legislation, rather than restricting it to 'this act'. Also, anthrocentricism is bad - try to avoid mentioning Humans in your proposals, as not all nations are populated with such creatures. Finally, to avoid ambiguity (that is, 'wildlife' may apply only to animals to some people), we would like the text to assure protection for plant and animal life.

2. DEFINES "pollution" as chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in the environment or the health of a population,
We believe this really should be a 'defines' clause, rather than a 'clarification' at the end of the proposal.

2. ENCOURAGES Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly Industry.

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP) with the following duties:
i. To collect & and publish annual WA-wide reports on nation wise statistics of industrial pollution in Member Nations., We prefer spelling out 'and' to using an ampersand, and believe the further edits to this clause clean it up nicely.
ii. To work with mMember nNations to assess thresholds of environmental quality for their environmentsof each member state., I know we mentioned superfluous capitalisation in your previous effort, but we believe 'Member Nations' ought to be capitalised. Also, we cleaned up the phrasing again.
iii. To help mMember nNations assess total economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution,this includes but not limited to health and environment mismanagement costs. If WASP is helping assess the total cost of pollution, there is no need to enumerate a specific example.
iv. To work with mMember nNations and to estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations' thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction in member states., Please do not neglect the apostrophe!
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the mMember nNations.,
vi. To promote and encourage R&D efforts research and development to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, and improve pollution monitoring and control.,

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP.,
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor & and ensure compliance of Industry with these policies.,
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness in Industry about pollution control measures & and technologies. Also, and to encourage R&D research and development efforts in reduction of pollutionthis direction.,
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with enforcement suitable to the Member Nationpunishments of adequate fines and/or incarceration., Eireann Fae, for one, practices neither levying of fines nor incarceration. Offenders within our society would be pariahs - which is bad enough in a close-knit community - or be banished from the Island altogether if their crime is severe enough.
v. To establish policies that ensure that pollution from the nation's industries does not cause harm in other nations., Do not forget the apostrophe! Also we are pleased that you use the language 'other nations' here, rather than 'neighbouring nations', preemptively securing a possible loophole. Well done on that account!

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote landscaping & tree plantation carbon neutrality efforts in and around Iindustries.,
To be honest, we are not completely satisfied with your wording or ours here, but perhaps there is room for some compromise. Others might bring up offshore oil platforms and the like, where it would be difficult to practice such efforts 'in and around' the industries (which need not be a capitalised proper noun here, by the way), so this line may need tweaking.

6. CLARIFIES that pollution includes chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in environment and / or health of population.

7. FURTHER6. CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly;

AWARE that industrial growth may be essential for economic development, and one of the main sources of employment in many Member Nations,

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution may negatively impact a nation's environment and population,

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution may have a detrimental effect on environmental health and public safety resulting in harm to the nation,

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health,

ENCOURAGING Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly industry,

1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe or unable to sustain natural flora and fauna,

2. DEFINES "pollution" as chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in the environment or the health of a population,

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP) with the following duties:
i. To collect and publish annual reports on industrial pollution in Member Nations,
ii. To work with Member Nations to assess thresholds of environmental quality for their environments,
iii. To help Member Nations assess total economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution,
iv. To work with Member Nations to estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations' thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction,
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the Member Nations,
vi. To promote and encourage research and development to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, and improve pollution monitoring and control,

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP,
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor and ensure compliance with these policies,
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness about pollution control measures and technologies, and to encourage research and development efforts in reduction of pollution,
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with enforcement suitable to the Member Nation,
v. To establish policies that ensure that pollution from the nation's industries do not cause harm in other nations,

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote carbon neutrality efforts in and around industries,

6. CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

[Point Breeze]

-snip -

I love it when the Faeries edit proposals, they come out looking so much better - contextually and aesthetically.

In all seriousness, I concur with all of the Eireann's suggestions, however their true nature as total grammar Nazis has been revealed.

I do want to note a concern raised by another nation earlier that has failed to be addressed. If we are to make a comprehensive effort to promote cleaner business practices, then I do not believe such efforts should ever be forgone due to economic conditions. If the businesses fail to adapt, so be it, they were doomed to fail.

What's more, I'm concerned by the potential for abuse. Suspension of regulations because the businesses refuse to change their practices is a giant loophole.

[Elke and Elba]

Seems like it's fine, but for the proposal, it seems it can be articulated better :/

Actually, since it's an existing committee, just naming it and giving it stuff to do is fine.

Just clarifying - you misunderstood my point. There's no problem with the mandating of what the committee should do as you pointed out (and made me look like an idiot in the midst ) I meant the rest of the whole draft can be reword and structured clearer. To me some portions look like garbled mess or slightly redundant. :/

[Eireann Fae]

In all seriousness, I concur with all of the Eireann's suggestions, however their true nature as total grammar Nazis has been revealed.

(OOC: I have no problem with this conclusion :-)

[Sakash]

"We regret being unavailable to aid you in your previous effort, only having the time to make our comments and suggestions after your proposal had come to a vote. It is our intention now to rectify that by helping iron out the problems we have with this effort, in the hopes that we can get a solid resolution on the books in this matter. As I indicated earlier, the Community of Eireann Fae is dedicated to protecting the environment, and will do whatever we can to help produce a good resolution in this vein."

Rowan passes the Sakashi Ambassador a pair of documents, one with numerous editor's marks and the other a 'final draft' with the edits in place. "Our suggestions, Ambassador. We hope they serve you well."

Legend:
Deleted text
Added text
Comments[/box]

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly:;
This is more a stylistic concern than a real problem with the legislation, but I prefer the 'run-on sentence' paradigm for drafting legislation. As such, I have changed the terminal punctuation here to a semi-colon, and replaced the periods at the end of subsequent clauses with commas. Feel free to ignore this recommendation; it is just a light suggestion.

AWARE that industrial growth is may be essential for economic development, and one of the main sources of employment in most many mMember nNations.,
Softer language really ought to be used here. Industrial growth is not a base necessity for economic development, and not even necessarily a primary source of employment in most nations. A good statement in general, but overreaches a bit for our taste.

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution may negatively impacts national populations a nation's environment and population.,
Pollution does, after all, effect more than the 'population' of a nation, and we feel it is important to stress the environmental effects of such pollution as well as its effect on people.

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution has may have a detrimental effect on public environmental health and food public safety resulting in net economic harm to the nation through hidden costs associated with environmental mismanagement.,
Again, softening the language a bit with that first edit. Also, again, bringing focus to harm on the environment and not just the people that live in it. We are also completely unconcerned with the financial drawbacks of pollution, and would rather see such practices reigned in for the sake of said environment and public health rather than to save a few dollars.

CONVINCED that unregulated pollution from industries disproportionately affect the poorest segments of society causing social injustice.
We are not so convinced. Pollution is a problem for everybody, not merely the poor and disenfranchised. This clause may be stricken entirely, in our opinion.

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health.,
Note that this is one of the very few instances where we do not mind the inclusion of financial concerns. Aside from the terminal punctuation, we would not wish to change this line at all.

ENCOURAGING Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly industry.
Note that we are simply moving a clause up a line, as we feel it works better in the preamble rather than in the active clause area. It is an encouragement, not a mandate, so there is no reason to not have it up here.

1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" (for the purposes of this act) as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe for human use and/or unable to sustain natural flora and faunawildlife.",
I would leave the term available for future legislation, rather than restricting it to 'this act'. Also, anthrocentricism is bad - try to avoid mentioning Humans in your proposals, as not all nations are populated with such creatures. Finally, to avoid ambiguity (that is, 'wildlife' may apply only to animals to some people), we would like the text to assure protection for plant and animal life.

2. DEFINES "pollution" as chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in the environment or the health of a population,
We believe this really should be a 'defines' clause, rather than a 'clarification' at the end of the proposal.

2. ENCOURAGES Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly Industry.

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP) with the following duties:
i. To collect & and publish annual WA-wide reports on nation wise statistics of industrial pollution in Member Nations., We prefer spelling out 'and' to using an ampersand, and believe the further edits to this clause clean it up nicely.
ii. To work with mMember nNations to assess thresholds of environmental quality for their environmentsof each member state., I know we mentioned superfluous capitalisation in your previous effort, but we believe 'Member Nations' ought to be capitalised. Also, we cleaned up the phrasing again.
iii. To help mMember nNations assess total economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution,this includes but not limited to health and environment mismanagement costs. If WASP is helping assess the total cost of pollution, there is no need to enumerate a specific example.
iv. To work with mMember nNations and to estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations' thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction in member states., Please do not neglect the apostrophe!
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the mMember nNations.,
vi. To promote and encourage R&D efforts research and development to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, and improve pollution monitoring and control.,

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP.,
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor & and ensure compliance of Industry with these policies.,
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness in Industry about pollution control measures & and technologies. Also, and to encourage R&D research and development efforts in reduction of pollutionthis direction.,
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with enforcement suitable to the Member Nationpunishments of adequate fines and/or incarceration., Eireann Fae, for one, practices neither levying of fines nor incarceration. Offenders within our society would be pariahs - which is bad enough in a close-knit community - or be banished from the Island altogether if their crime is severe enough.
v. To establish policies that ensure that pollution from the nation's industries does not cause harm in other nations., Do not forget the apostrophe! Also we are pleased that you use the language 'other nations' here, rather than 'neighbouring nations', preemptively securing a possible loophole. Well done on that account!

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote landscaping & tree plantation carbon neutrality efforts in and around Iindustries.,
To be honest, we are not completely satisfied with your wording or ours here, but perhaps there is room for some compromise. Others might bring up offshore oil platforms and the like, where it would be difficult to practice such efforts 'in and around' the industries (which need not be a capitalised proper noun here, by the way), so this line may need tweaking.

6. CLARIFIES that pollution includes chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in environment and / or health of population.

7. FURTHER6. CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

[spoiler=Draft version]

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly;

AWARE that industrial growth may be essential for economic development, and one of the main sources of employment in many Member Nations,

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution may negatively impact a nation's environment and population,

WORRIED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution may have a detrimental effect on environmental health and public safety resulting in harm to the nation,

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health,

ENCOURAGING Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly industry,

1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe or unable to sustain natural flora and fauna,

2. DEFINES "pollution" as chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in the environment or the health of a population,

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP) with the following duties:
i. To collect and publish annual reports on industrial pollution in Member Nations,
ii. To work with Member Nations to assess thresholds of environmental quality for their environments,
iii. To help Member Nations assess total economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution,
iv. To work with Member Nations to estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations' thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction,
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the Member Nations,
vi. To promote and encourage research and development to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, and improve pollution monitoring and control,

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP,
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor and ensure compliance with these policies,
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness about pollution control measures and technologies, and to encourage research and development efforts in reduction of pollution,
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with enforcement suitable to the Member Nation,
v. To establish policies that ensure that pollution from the nation's industries do not cause harm in other nations,

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote carbon neutrality efforts in and around industries,

6. CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

Ambassador of Sakash receives the documents from Rowan gratefully. Thanks your delegation for the wonderful work, suggestions and opinions you have put in a commendable job. The purpose of submitting the proposal was to get the attention of worthy people like you with whose guidance I am sure, this much needed legislation will be better more acceptable to the Member Nations.

I have accepted most of your valuable suggestions in revised draft. And made some more changes. Your suggestions on language are duly noted with thanks and will try to avoid such errors in future.

As regarding the social injustice clause, i would like to retain it as a worry instead of convince. You have rightly indicated that pollution does affect everybody. yet pollution does affect the poor more than rich. Rich can have air-conditioned offices, homes and travel, but the poor are more exposed. Rich benefit more from low cost of items produced in polluting industries where as poor cant even afford much of the produce. It is the poor whose health gets more affected by the pollution as they dont have money to change residence from polluted areas, and dont have access to the costly health care.

[Sakash]

I do want to note a concern raised by another nation earlier that has failed to be addressed. If we are to make a comprehensive effort to promote cleaner business practices, then I do not believe such efforts should ever be forgone due to economic conditions. If the businesses fail to adapt, so be it, they were doomed to fail.

What's more, I'm concerned by the potential for abuse. Suspension of regulations because the businesses refuse to change their practices is a giant loophole.

Many Member Nations have raised concern that economic condition of a nation needs to be considered when making such regulations. It would unwise to push such resolution on an imploded nation who is struggling for food to feed its population and make it loose whatever goods & income they get from industries they badly need. Once WASP sets a reasonable targets for pollution reduction, the business will have to accept them as it will be national policy. I dont see the loophole you suggest.

[Potted Plants United]

OOC: Argh, one of these days I'll learn to check what nation I'm on. Consider this an Araraukar post.

ENCOURAGING Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly industry.

IC: Actually, that's a perfectly legal mandate in the WA legalese, I'd leave it where it was before the fairies got their tiny hands on it.

Many Member Nations have raised concern that economic condition of a nation needs to be considered when making such regulations.

Actually this was something you completely misunderstood.

We were concerned with giving some WA committee the permission to prohibit entire industries within a nation, if it was unable to hit arbitrary targets. That clause alone could've halted the industrial development of a developing nation. (OOC: See Earth and industrial revolution.)

[Rio Cana]

Rio Cana diplomat to the GA -

Yes this is a good proposal. However, has in our Empire. there are still many developing nations that cannot afford a draconian proposal like this one. Do not misunderstand, most developing nations believe in curbing pollution. Many, has in our Empire, even have laws which address this problem. But when it comes to draconian anti-pollution laws, developing nations like our own cannot really afford them since they will greatly affect our growing economy. So developing nations should be exempt from this proposal.

[Araraukar]

So developing nations should be exempt from this proposal.

He can't do that, because making a proposal optional means making it illegal.

(OOC: Illegal means "against the proposal rules", which you can find here: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=159348 )

[Sakash]

Rio Cana diplomat to the GA -

Yes this is a good proposal. However, has in our Empire. there are still many developing nations that cannot afford a draconian proposal like this one. Do not misunderstand, most developing nations believe in curbing pollution. Many, has in our Empire, even have laws which address this problem. But when it comes to draconian anti-pollution laws, developing nations like our own cannot really afford them since they will greatly affect our growing economy. So developing nations should be exempt from this proposal.

I have considered this issue of developing nations by linking Industrial pollution control to nations economy. If the economy is imploded then pollution targets are according what the nation can do without hurting it much.

3 iv. To work with Member Nations to estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations' thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction,

[Sakash]

Let me be pedantic

1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" (for the purposes of this act) as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe for human use and/or unable to sustain natural wildlife." Question: whichever is lesser, or whichever is more? Since the addition of and/or could make interpretation go either way.

Taken care of in the redraft. thank you for indicating.

2. ENCOURAGES Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly Industry. Not quite sure what an "environmentally-friendly Industry" means actually; given that you've asserted that this reso is to increase environment's quality at the expense of industry too :/ Are there such things as enivronmentally-friendly industries?

Yes there are such things.

ii. To work with member nations to assess thresholds (isn't it defined as above - I don't think there's any room of manipulation of the thresholds, seriously.) of environmental quality for the environments of each member state.

Depending on kind of flora, fauna and environmental condition the pollution targets change. Even the kind of sentient being needs to be considered before setting pollution control targets.

v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the member nation. (I'm not getting this - so you mean environment can take a back-seat when the country is in recession?)

Yes. Food, shelter, law and order are more important priorities than pollution.

i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP. (Wow, here's the real bomb. Well then, what the use of using "encourage" in the previous paragraph then?)

To re-emphasize and for fun of it

iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with punishments of adequate fines and/or incarceration. (Businesses could pay it off easily, just saying. Potential loophole.)

Its as much a loophole as the absence of this clause. Its as much loophole as having any law a nation has including criminal penal codes.

v. To establish policies that ensure that pollution from nations industries does not cause harm in other nations. (If any nation could ensure it... Then I see no reason why everyone is in the WA. You are signalling we are some deity-like figures who can ensure things don't fly across borders.)

Thank you for comments. reworded it. hope this would be better.

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote landscaping (Well I'm not sure if this is enivronmentally-friendly or harmful...) & tree plantation efforts in and around Industries. (!!!! - WARNING - TREE GROWING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE IRONWORKS!!! )

Again good comment, reworded it. thanks.

[Sakash]

Sakash, I'll have a closer look at this soon, hopefully later today, but I need to run out of the door soon.

Thank you for your support and waiting for your opinion.

[Sakash]

planning on submitting the proposal if there are no more comments or objections.

[The Dark Star Republic]

OOC: Because I never received a response last time and have still not to date, I do plan on resubmitting my legal challenge to your proposal should you resubmit it, as I have received no indication not to.

And if it passes, I'll have one more to add to my NEF repeal!

[Sakash]

OOC: Because I never received a response last time and have still not to date, I do plan on resubmitting my legal challenge to your proposal should you resubmit it, as I have received no indication not to.

And if it passes, I'll have one more to add to my NEF repeal!

CONVINCED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution may have a detrimental effect on environmental health and public safety resulting in extreme hazard to the population of the nation.

I hope the modified clause satisfies your earlier objection.

[The Dark Star Republic]

OOC: Heh, well, I guess I was half hoping you wouldn't make that change! I won't quibble over it being in the preamble, not the operative section, as the mods don't generally distinguish in that regard - and yes, I do now believe your proposal is, at least in terms of contradiction with NEF, legal.

[Sakash]

OOC: Heh, well, I guess I was half hoping you wouldn't make that change! I won't quibble over it being in the preamble, not the operative section, as the mods don't generally distinguish in that regard - and yes, I do now believe your proposal is, at least in terms of contradiction with NEF, legal.

thank you. do you have any more suggestions or comments regarding the draft?

[Point Breeze]

Industrial Pollution Control Act
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.

Category: Environmental
Industry Affected: All Businesses
Proposed by: Sakash

Description: The World Assembly;

AWARE that industrial growth may be essential for economic development, and one of the main sources of employment in many Member Nations,

CONCERNED however, that industrial pollution may negatively impact a nation's environment and population,

WORRIED that unregulated pollution from industries disproportionately affect the poorest segments of society causing social injustice.
I'm sorry, I just don't agree. I feel that environmental pollution affect every citizen of every nation equally, since they share the same ecosystem. Further, this is an environmental proposal, while this clause would have more place in a Social Justice or Human Rights act.

CONVINCED that without proper safeguards, industrial pollution may have a detrimental effect on environmental health and public safety resulting in extreme hazard to the population of the nation.

DETERMINED to ensure that a proper balance is struck between economic development and environmental and public health,

ENCOURAGING Member Nations to promote environmentally friendly industry.

1. DEFINES "Threshold of environmental quality" as: "The level of environmental degradation beyond which an area is deemed unsafe for population or unable to sustain natural flora and fauna",

2. DEFINES "pollution" as chemical and energy contaminants that cause adverse change in the environment or the health of a population,
Do we need a definition of pollution? I think most of us with any sort of national scientific basis can understand what we're talking about

3. TASKS the World Assembly Science Program (WASP) with the following duties:
i. To collect and publish annual reports on industrial pollution in Member Nations,
ii. To work with Member Nations to assess thresholds of environmental quality for their environments,
iii. To help Member Nations assess total economic loss to the nations and their population due to industrial pollution,
Is this supposed to read "Environmental loss?" In the preamble, you're primarily concerned with the cost of human and environmental health, not with the effects pollution may have on businesses
iv. To work with Member Nations to estimate the economic viability of adapting the nations' thresholds of environmental quality and to produce suitable recommended targets for pollution reduction,
v. To revise these recommended targets with the changes in economic conditions of the Member Nations,
vi. To promote and encourage research and development to reduce industrial pollution, recycling waste where possible, and improve pollution monitoring,

4. MANDATES Member Nations to implement the following:
i. To adapt thresholds of environmental quality and implementation of pollution reduction targets recommended by WASP,
Forgive my ignorance, but how does one "adapt" a threshold of environmental quality? Maybe I'm misunderstanding, but I thought the thresholds were simply lines in the sand beyond which the environmental health of a nation is considered severely damaged. Do they come with policy recommendations or other such "adaptable" things? The WASP already creates policy recommendations elsewhere in this draft. I may be nitpicking, but I just don't understand.
ii. To establish policies aimed at reaching pollution reduction targets and monitor and ensure compliance with these policies,
iii. To promote pollution control by creating awareness about pollution control measures and technologies, and to encourage research and development efforts in reduction of pollution,
iv. Criminalize violations of this act, with enforcement suitable to the Member Nation, .
I think you can expand this to include any laws or regulations set in place as a result of this act, as the WA doesn't have the authority to regulate the actions of your citizens in the way criminal laws are concerned
v. To establish policies that aim to prevent pollution from the nation's industries from causing harm in other nations,

5. ENCOURAGES Nations to promote energy conservation, carbon neutrality and landscaping efforts in and around industries where possible,

6. CLARIFIES that nothing in this act prevents member nations from providing aid, financial, technical, or otherwise, to companies in order to meet the requirements of this act.

[Sakash]

WORRIED that unregulated pollution from industries disproportionately affect the poorest segments of society causing social injustice.
I'm sorry, I just don't agree. I feel that environmental pollution affect every citizen of every nation equally, since they share the same ecosystem. Further, this is an environmental proposal, while this clause would have more place in a Social Justice or Human Rights act.

Your concern is right. This is the reason it is in preamble. The point is actually to show that this affects not only environment but is also partly social justice issue. your assumption that pollution affects all citizens equally is not true. poor people cannot afford proper health care or prevent exposure by having A/c offices and transport. Rich people can and they are less prone to exposure to pollution than poor and they have enough money to afford better health care.

Is this supposed to read "Environmental loss?" In the preamble, you're primarily concerned with the cost of human and environmental health, not with the effects pollution may have on businesses

we are concerned about economic development of nation which only partly due to businesses. The cost of health care due to pollution is a cost to nation and its people. Businesses are also affected by those costs. If we can save nations expenditure by controlling pollution then it must be a welcome measure.