World Cup of Hockey 23 - Everything Thread

by **Gyatso-kai** » Sat Feb 08, 2014 7:51 pm

Ice Bisons SPREAD Eagles! Nassau-Hessen Down 5-3!

ONLINE EDITION

08 FEBRUARY 2014.1

TOURNAMENT - WORLD CUP OF HOCKEY

Comment (100243)

Share & Re-Post (96772)

Lianbook

RepTwitter

Print

After a draw and a 2-nil shutout, the Ice Bisons face the Nassau-Hessen Eagles for their first game on "home ice", only to take the Eagles down 5-3.

"It was a great game," spoke Ice Bisons Captain Hakoda Ishii after the game. "We played good, beat the Eagles, and showed the young team how an experienced unit performs."

The Hessian team, which in a pre-tournament interview had stated how they were "looking to use their little experience to their advantage against many other unranked teams", was taken aback by the speed of the Ice Bisons in the first period: With Hakoda Ishii winning the face off, it would take the centre just four seconds to make it to Hessian net, where he would pass the puck back to Ito. Ito would take the shot, which Jacob Anders would miraculously block the shot, but on the rebound, Ishii would take the puck up over the sprawling netminder and make a goal at just 8-seconds into the game.

"It was quite the goal," Ito stated during an interview at the first intermission. "I knew what the Captain wanted to do, and simply followed him up the ice. I guess years of experience outranks the fresh meat thrown to the sharks any day."

A rivalry perhaps?

Coming back into play, the Ice Bisons would keep a strong presence on the Eagles, keeping them to just eight shots in the first period. However, as with most things under pressure, eventually there is a leak. On a breakaway, Oscar Johnson would manage to get a shot off against Zhao Hotaka, who managed to rebound the shot into the right corner. A waiting Olaf Liedland would manage to collect the puck and fee it back to a waiting Johnson, who managed to out-manoeuvre Ito and Sato Sorua, sinking the puck into the net at 12:08.

Going into the second, the Ice Bisons were determined to show the Eagles their experience. In the ninth minute, with the action happening up ice in the Eagles' zone, Todd Harrison would trip-up an unsuspecting Kuruk Ikeda and send him down. Not wanting this young player to think he could just trip anyone, Ikeda would skate up and harass Harrison. Then the game got good when Harrison would take his stick and strike Ikeda on the back and rop his gloves. Poor young Harrison, facing off against a 95-kilo Mandalorian... The fight was one of the better ones we have seen on the multiverse stage, with Ikeda easily taking Harrison to school and landing several head hits before sending his Hessian opponent down to the ice. However, the cockiness of Ikeda would get him an Unsportsmanlike Conduct for the words he exchanged with Harrison after the boy got up from the ice.

Something about a father and a sheep with his sister...

In either case, soon after the fight --- which seemed to invigorate the Ice Bisons as they would score twice in the tenth minute: Ishii would land his second goal at 10:30 and Hei Hayate would get his second tournament goal at 10:48. Nassau-Hessen would not allow those goals to go unanswered; with thirteen shots on goal in the second period, their efforts would be rewarded with the Eagles' second goal of the game in the eighteenth minute.

At the start of the third period, the Ice Bisons would switch to a more defensive style of play, hoping to keep the game to 3-2. However, at 9:26, Johnson would strike again with the help of Liedland and Karl Willard. The Ice Bisons would not allow that goal to tie the game and give them another draw. With a flurry of action in the Bisons' zone, it would be Ito who would manage to steal the puck and make a breakway to Anders. Completely caught off guard, Anders would be found spread on the ice as Ito sniped the puck straight over his head with such force the ding on the back bar would be heard right before the explosion of the fans. At 4-3, the Eagles would attempt to shut down their zone, daring to stop the Ice Bisons, and the game almost ended at 4-3. The youth and inexperience of the Eagles would be their downfall as they called Anders back to the bench at 19:10 to get an extra attacker on the ice to try and draw the game. Thankfully for the Ice Bisons, the shooting skills of Kal Skirata --- son of the Head Coach and Golden Child of the Ice Bisons --- would manage to get the puck just past the Bisons' blue line and make a long-range shot to send the puck gliding effortlessly into the net as two Eagles defencemen failed at chasing the puck down.

Experience outranks everything... Hopefully the Eagles learn their lesson now.

Goal Summary

First Period
GKI --- H. Ishii [Ito P.] (00:08)
NHN --- O. Johnson [O. Liedland] (12:08)

Second Period
GKI --- H. Ishii [Sato S, W. Tay'haai] (10:21)
GKI --- Hei H. [Ko P., K. Skirata] (10:48)
NHN ---G. Melbourne [C. Nicholas, F. Heimer] (18:52)

Third Period
NHN --- O. Johnson [K. Willard, O. Liedland] (09:26)
GKI --- Ito P. [H. Ishii, A. Ishida] (09:38)
GKI --- K. Skirata [Kuang D., Hiteki K.] (19:30) *Empty Net*

Penalty Summary

First Period
01:42 --- NHN --- Elbowing, 2-min --- T. Harrison drawn by Sato S.
06:21 --- GKI --- Elbowing, 2-min --- K. Skirata drawn by F. Heimer
16:18 --- NHN --- Slashing, 2-min --- C. Nicholas drawn by Ito P.

Second Period
09:01 --- NHN --- Tripping, 2-min --- T. Harrison drawn by K. Ikeda
09:35 --- NHN --- Instigating, 2-min --- T. Harrison drawn by K. Ikeda
09:35 --- NHN --- Fighting, 5-min --- T. Harrison drawn by K. Ikeda
09:35 --- GKI --- Fighting, 5-min --- K. Ikeda drawn by T. Harrison
09:35 --- GKI --- Unsportsmanlike Conduct, 2-min --- K. Ikeda drawn by T. Harrison

Third Period
02:22 --- GKI --- Tripping, 2-min --- Sato S. drawn by L. Corey
14:50 --- GKI --- Hooking, 2-min --- K. Skirata drawn by F. Crow

Goaltending

Team	Name		SA	GA	Saves	SV%	TOI
GKI	Zhao H.		32	03	29	0.967	60:00
NHN	J. Anders	40	05	35	0.875	59:15

Shots on Goal Summary

TEAM	1st	2nd	3rd	OT	FINAL
GKI	12	16	12	XX	40
NHN	08	13	11	XX	32

Injury Summary

**No Injuries Reported**

Three Stars

First Star: Zhao Hotaka (32 Shots, 29 Saves)
Second Star: Hakoda Ishii (2G, 1A)
Third Star: Pakku Ito (1G, 1A)

Post Match comments

2-2, 2-nil, and NOW we finally get a good one. 5-3 at the final. Should have been 5-nil, but eh.

Can Yue-Lo --- Avatarian Sports Commentator, on ASPN's Can YUE-LO?!

After a 'rough start' by our standards, it is nice to see the team getting back to form.

Yin Junhong --- Avatarian Ice Hockey Expert, on ASPN's AHL Tonight

THAT'S MY BOYS!!! #icebisons #wcoh23!!!

Aima Yelim --- Avatarian AV Idol on RepTwitter

SCHEDULE

Group Four
Matchday 01, 06 February at ₃₂Neu Engollon --- DRAW 2-2
Matchday 02, 07 February at _NRSuper-Llamaland --- WIN 0-2
Matchday 03, 08 February vs ₇₄Nassau-Hessen --- WIN 5-3
Matchday 04, 09 February at _NRCrystal Empire
Matchday 05, 10 February vs ₁₂Falcus
Matchday 06, 11 February at ₇Mohawk Clans
Matchday 07, 12 February vs _NRMiddleton Valley
Matchday 08, 13 February at _NRTransalpine Republic
Matchday 09, 14 February vs ₃₇The Fair Republic

Group Four --- Matchday 3

Middleton Valley 2 – 0 Super-Llamaland
Transalpine Republic 0 – 1 Mohawk Clans
The Fair Republic 0 – 1 Falcus
Neu Engollon 5 – 3 Crystal Empire
Gyatso-Kai 5 – 3 Nassau-Hessen

Super-Llamabad has continued their downward spiral, taking a hard 2-nil loss to fellow unranked Middleton Valley. Falcus, the twelfth-ranked team in the world just barely edged out The Fair Republic 1-nil after yesterdays 3-all draw with Transalphine Republic. Neu Engollon, who yesterday made it by a lone against Nassau-Hessen, triumphantly put down Crystal Empire 5-3.

   Group 4                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
 1 Mohawk Clans                     3   3  0  0    4   0  +4    9
 2 Gyatso-Kai                       3   2  1  0    9   5  +4    7
 3 Neu Engollon                     3   2  1  0   10   7  +3    7
 4 Falcus                           3   1  2  0    5   4  +1    5
 5 Transalpine Republic             3   1  1  1    5   5   0    4
 6 Middleton Valley                 3   1  1  1    3   3   0    4
   The Fair Republic                3   1  1  1    3   3   0    4
 8 Crystal Empire                   3   0  1  2    6   9  −3    1
 9 Nassau-Hessen                    3   0  0  3    5   9  −4    0
10 Super-Llamaland                  3   0  0  3    0   5  −5    0

The Goalscorers for Gyatso-kai

Player	                Line	Caps	G	A	Pts
BEI FONG Lo		R	**	**	**	**
DENIGII Aukaneck	3	3	0	0	0
FONG Laobei		3	3	0	0	0
Jaster GILAMIJ		3	3	0	0	0
HEI Hayate		2	2	2	1	3
HITEKI Kia		2	2	0	2	2
HONG Makhu		R1	**	**	**	**
Kuruk IKEDA		R	**	**	**	**
Arnook ISHIDA		1	3	1	1	2
Hakoda ISHII 		1	3	3	2	5
Pakku ITO		1	3	1	2	3	
JIANG Tujing		3	3	0	0	0
KIMA Yagone		R	**	**	**	**
KO Piandao		1	3	0	1	1
KOBE Matsuda		R	**	**	**	**
KUANG Deniigi		2	3	0	1	1	
LEE Ning Xue		R	**	**	**	**
LUPIS Ulva		R	**	**	**	**
NGUYEN Tho		R	**	**	**	**
OTO Oyaji		R	**	**	**	**
PAK Dae Li		R	**	**	**	**
SATO Sorua		1	3	0	2	2
Kal SKIRATA		2	3	1	1	2
Wad'e TAY'HAAI		1	3	0	1	1
TORU Akiak		3	3	0	0	0
Walon VAU		2	3	0	0	0
ZHAO Hotaka		1	3	0	0	0

The Next Match

Preview: Matchday 4 at _NRCrystal Empire

Going up against the unranked Crystal Empire, the Ice Bisons hope to sink them even further down the standings. Already at 0-1-3, the neutral-style, neutral named team shouldn't be any threat to the Ice Bisons, sparing Margaret striking down our boys for no reason other than her own sick thrills.

Copyright 2014.1 Avatarian Sports Programming Network. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
URL: http://www.aspn.com.gk/articles/ahl/20882753
© 2014 Avatarian Sportts Programming Network[/spoiler]

by **Anditia** » Sat Feb 08, 2014 10:46 pm

Another loss following the hopeful win
James Minna--SAINTLAND

"Simple joy followed by a crushing defeat."

These were the words uttered by James Van Ryk following Anditia's loss to Estope by a score of 3-1 during the most recent game of group play. The "simple joy" Van Ryk was referring to is the joy of the Wolverines after they managed to leave of the doldrums they had entered during their first game of the WCoH with a dominant win (5-1) over Kinzar during their prior game. The Wolverines seem to be playing without any urgency- almost like they've decided whether they win or lose simply by sizing up the other team- and when the perennial sporting powerhouse of Estope is staring you in the eyes, most teams tend to be shaken up. Unfortunately for the Wolverines, they were more than shaken up allowing two early goals during the opening minutes of play. Despite this early setback, the Wolverines were able to claw their way back during the second, scoring on a power play to come within 1 with momentum leaning their way into the third. During the wining minutes of the game, Estope was able to gain puck possession and heave a long shot on an empty net- sealing the loss.

The Wolverines next face Sel Appa- a team with a 2-0-1 record despite a -1 goal differential... Almost the antithesis of Anditia... We'll see who comes out on top.

by **Qazox** » Sat Feb 08, 2014 11:17 pm

QOXSPORTS.com/Hockey

QZX 1-0-2--3
NNA 2-1-1--4

Qazox' third consecutive one-goal game saw them lose to newcomers, New North Aqmuland 4-3. Jack Rogers, who started the first 3 games for Qazox was benched for the remainder of the group stage, as Jason Park will assume goaltending duties for the next game with Brian Allen being the backup goalie.

The Maroon Lions, as New North Aqmuland's team is known by, jumped on Rogers early and often, sending 13 shots at him in the opening period. But surprisingly Qazox' Frank Fischer opened the scoring, just 3:18 into game, tipping home a rebound from a Victor Chalmette shot. Allen Evair tied the game at the 15:20 mark, putting home his own rebound past Rogers. Mayar Ghev scored with just 17 seconds left in the 1st, as Qazox was caught flatfooted on a 3-on-1, ending the period down a goal.

The second period saw the game get a bit chippy, as a total of 44 penalty minutes was whistled in the period, all of which where handed out to the double slugfest between Nasar Makli and Sean Halverson just before the midway point of the period (9:35). Both players were called for a mutual roughing penalties, and dropped the gloves on the way to the penalty box. The two would go at it again just seconds after they both left the box. The referees, for once on the ball, promptly whistled both for misconduct and tossed both out of the game. With 2:18 left, Ghev scored again on a wraparound as Rogers was twisted around the wrong way, leaving Ghev an open net to make it 3-1.

Just 78 seconds into the 3rd, it was 4-1 as Ghev completed his natural hat-trick, banging home a rebounded shot from Daniel Freghan. Rogers was pulled after Ghev's 3rd goal, as Park came on. Park did well stopping all 6 shots he faced; but seeing as the Maroon Lions were in a 'prevent defense', so to speak, it's hard to tell if he is the real deal in net. Qazox did manage to trim the lead, behind goals from Gary Duberville at the 14:18 mark and on a powerplay caused by Lane St. John tripping Mike Lupido. Lupido would score on the powerply (18:24); but alas, Qazox couldn't get off any shots in the final 47 seconds even with Park pulled for an extra skater.

by **Neu Engollon** » Sat Feb 08, 2014 11:32 pm

"Neu Engollon, once again I bring you good news. Magda Wertauer here on the NETV Sports 7 Update. The Ibex have done it again, taking down another opponent in a rough and tumble game on the ice in Progress Stadium in Saintland. This time, it was the Crystal Empire's turn to face the Ibex, and they were actually able to hold up well, scoring 3 goals to the Ibex 5. The fact that two of three were shot by their first line right winger was not lost on the Neu Engollon defense, who were sure to keep full coverage on him the rest of the game.

For his part, Primo Delmasso once again blazed down the ice to sink one early and get in the faces of the Crystal defense. He had one more goal towards the end of the 2nd period, with an assist from Ernst Volkzein. Sameaux got the second goal of the evening off a ricochet from one of the Crystal's defensemen. Previous to Delmasso's second goal, the De Gratzo was able to slap one from just over the center line from a crucial pass by Velper. The final goal of the evening was courtesy of Andre Manon, who got in close and in the faces of the defenders, learning some tricks from his bud, Primo.

While the Crystal Empire were able to tie the Fair Republic, they proved no match for the Ibex. Now, Neu Engollon is hunkering down to play 12th ranked Falcus. They are preparing by watching videos, studying most commonly run plays and coming up with counter strategies of their own, so says Coach Le Houne.
We continue to be their big fans here, and wish them the best of luck in Saintland.

Now, onto the rugby scores at the Cup..."

by **Equestrian States** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 12:18 am

The Pony Republic of Equestrian States
National Ice Hockey Team - World Cup of Hockey 23

All-Time Stats
World Ranking: 13th (00.00 pts.)
Style Modifier: +5.0
Record: 16-3-5 (2-0-1 at WCoH 23)
Achievments: Round of 16 (WCoH 21), Host Nation (WCoH 21)

Group 3
#13 -

Equestrian States (34.63 pts.)
#22 - Estope (00.00 pts.)
#26 - Saintland (00.00 pts.)
#33 - Ko-oren (00.00 pts.)
#57 - Sel Appa (00.00 pts.)
UR - Anditia (0.00 pts.)
UR - Florgania (0.00 pts.)
UR - Howdeellow (0.00 pts.)
UR - Kinzar (0.00 pts.)
UR - Westbridge (0.00 pts.)

Tournament Schedule

Group Play - Group 3
Group Stage Schedule TBD

Roster
Ice hockey isn't exactly the most popular sport in the Equestrian States. In fact, it's not even in the top ten for the largest attendance draws (falling even behind the perpetually pathetic Handball League). To assemble their national team roster, the EIHF again looked to the Equestrian Ice Hockey League for players. The EIHL includes some of the most non-equine players of any sport league in the Equestrian States, and the roster of the national team reflects this well.

Forwards
LW - #49 - Wrister (Earth Pony - Male) - 29 - Appleloosa Juggernauts
LW - #10 - Twist (Changeling - Female) - 31 - Everfree Fire
LW - #20 - Peter Diruch (Human - Male) - 21 - Trottingham Bulls
LW - #2 - C Slapshot (Pegasus - Female) - 25 - Everfree Fire
C - #13 - Harry Kinson (Human - Male) - 33 - Trottawa Parliament
C - #27 - Angela Epstein (Human - Female) - 22 - Fairflanks North Stars
C - #8 - Icefire (Unicorn - Male) - 27 - Canterlot Ice
C - #50 - Benjamin Everdeen (Human - Female) - 20 - Everfree Fire
C - #19 - A Crimson Sky (Griffon - Female) - 30 - Fairflanks North Stars
C - #11 - Thunderblaze (Pegasus - Male) - 23 - Canterlot Ice
RW - #1 - Brynne Alexander (Human - Female) - 22 - Stalliongrad Summits
RW - #24 - Iceflow (Earth Pony - Male) - 29 - Fairflanks North Stars
RW - #57 - Stephen Petrovich (Human - Male) - 28 - Fairflanks North Stars
RW - #4 - Hotshot (Pegasus - Female) - 22 - Canterlot Ice

Defenders
D - #38 - Terrorsky (Griffon - Female) - 34 - Everfree Fire
D - #12 - Alexander Kemp (Human - Male) - 32 - Appleloosa Juggernauts
D - #29 - Boarder (Earth Pony - Male) - 26 - Stalliongrad Summits
D - #16 - Grant Richardson (Human - Male) - 27 - Stalliongrad Peaks
D - #48 - A Natalya Summers (Human - Female) - 28 - Fairflanks North Stars
D - #32 - Bloodfire (Griffon - Male) - 22 - Ponyville Hot-Shots
D - #3 - Instastop (Manticore - Female) - 36 - Everfree Fire
D - #43 - Overture (Unicorn - Female) - 25 - Canterlot Ice

Goaltenders
G - #45 - William Young (Human - Male) - 29 - Fairflanks North Stars
G - #5 - Shotcrusher (Manticore - Male) - 28 - Trottawa Parliament
G - #91 - Brick Wall (Earth Pony - Male) - 24 - Canterlot Ice

C - Team Captain
A - Alternate Team Captain

Strategy & Lines
Teams in the EIHL generally are more focused on finesse and speed than others, but with several major exceptions. Thus, the Equestrian States national team will play a more attacking style than their competitors. The defense will look to pass the puck forward and keep it out of the Equestrian zone to minimize the chances opponents will get. Goaltending isn't exactly a strong suit for the Equestrian States, so keeping the shots against to a lower number is a definite priority.

First Line
Slapshot (LW, #2); Angela Epstein (C, #27); Stephen Petrovich (RW, #57)

Second Line
Peter Durich (LW, #20); Crimson Sky (C, #19); Brynne Alexander (RW, #1)

Third Line
Wrister (LW, #49); Thunderblaze (C, #11); Iceflow (RW, #24)

Fourth Line
Twist (LW, #10); Icefire (C, #8); Hotshot (RW, #4)

First Pair
Natalya Summers (D, #48); Overture (D, #43)

Second Pair
Alexander Kemp (D, #12); Bloodfire (D, #32)

Third Pair
Instastop (D, #3); Grant Richardson (D, #16)

Fourth Pair
Boarder (D, #29); Terrorsky (D, #38)

First Power Play
Slapshot (LW, #2); Crimson Sky (C, #19); Brynne Alexander (RW, #1); Natalya Summers (D, #48); Overture (D, #43)

Second Power Play
Peter Durich (LW, #20); Thunderblaze (C, #11); Hotshot (RW, #4); Alexander Kemp (D, #12); Grant Richardson (D, #16)

First Penalty Kill
Angela Epstein (C, #27); Icefire (C, #8); Bloodfire (D, #32); Overture (D, #43)

Second Penalty Kill
Iceflow (RW, #24); Crimson Sky (C, #19); Natalya Summers (D, #48); Grant Richardson (D, #16)

Team Staff
The Head Coach's job remains firmly in the hands of Nate Long, the first human to earn such a position on an Equestrian national team for any sport. Long earned his job through repeatedly dominating his rival (Bruiser) in "Coach of the Year" awards voting. But that's probably because the award is voted upon by the players, and Bruiser certainly has a personality to match his name, being an EIHL Hall of Fame defensepony.

Head Coach - Nate Long (Human - Male) - 50 - Fairflanks North Stars (Head Coach)
Assistant Coach - Bruiser (Earth Pony - Male) - 47 - Everfree Fire (Head Coach)
Assistant Coach - Laura Sisko (Human - Female) - 53 - Canterlot Ice (Head Coach)

Home Arena

Name: Canterlot Ice Arena
Location: Canterlot, Equestrian States
Capacity: 7,525
Short Description: One of the few purpose-built larger-capacity ice hockey arenas in the Equestrian States, the Canterlot Ice Arena is relatively new when compared to the older multi-purpose arenas in the nation. Canterlot Ice Arena is located on the outskirts of the Equestrian capital city, but is still easily accessible to visitors staying downtown Canterlot's higher-class hotels via the train. It's not ideal, perhaps, but it's the best the Equestrian States can offer right now.

RP Permissions

If my opponent RPs first, I give them the right to...
Choose My Scorers: Yes
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP Injuries to My Players: Yes - Only that the player was injured, not the type or severity
Godmod Injuries to My Players: Yes - See above for restrictions
RP Penalties for My Players: Yes - Generally, the Equestrians play a very clean game, so fewer penalties
RP Ejections for My Players: No - TG me if you really want to
Godmod Other Events: Yes - Just don't do anything stupid, ridiculously weird, or something that would likely irritate me (like portraying my team as being unintelligent non-sapient barnyard animals instead of sapient beings).

by **Ko-oren** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 3:53 am

Most scoring:
1. Sicoutimont (16), 2. Havl (15), 3. NSI/Perlasilangan (13)
Least condeding:
1. Royal Barangay/Mohawk Clans/
Gregoryisgodistan (0)
Record:
1. Havl 3-0-0 15-4 +11
4. Ko-oren 3-0-0 5-1 +4
60. Free Republics 0-0-3 1-8 -7

vs. Equestrian States (13th) 1-0 W
vs. Saintland (26th) 2-1 W
vs. Howdeellow (UR) 0-2 W
vs. Kinzar (UR)
vs. Estope (22)
vs. Westbridge (UR)
vs. Sel Appa (57)
vs. Anditia (UR)
vs. Florgania (UR)

Yttribia lost their status as team without any goal conceded against Maineiacs, and they immediately allowed 4. The Gregoryisgodistanis saw their first goals in general during the 3-0 win against the Free Republics, who now have the worst record of all 60 teams in the WCoH. They are tied with Nova Anglicana who had the title last match day (currently both on 0 points and -7 GD), but because the Free Republics scored less, they are currently last. Sicoutimont scored 6 against the poor Swibia defense and they are the most scoring team, overtaking Havl who have had 'only' three goals against Hicana. As far as the worst defenses are concerned, there are four teams with 11 goals conceded - two of which are not as low as you would think. Valanora is second and Qazox is third, all while conceding 11 goals more than, say, the Gregoryisgodistanis, who are 5th in their group. And then there is the cateogory of worst offenses: Super-Llamaland still have to score their first goal.

The Greenblues did an excellent job against Howdeellow, who had four points and no losses coming into this game. Ko-oren took over first place in the group with the 2-0 win, and the Equestrian States and Estope, who we first thought would lead the group by now, have found the way up now both are on two victories (and a loss). In fact, the former have finally released a press statement saying which players they intend to use throughout the tournament - My Little Pony ON ICE the musical.

The team scored its first non-powerplay goal today, with Vasiliev scoring the first goal mid-second period from Jaragun's faceoff. The second goal was at the end of the second period, when Howdeellow pulled their goaltender, and Biluthen, part of the not-so-strong second line, profited.

The next game features Kinzar, second-to-last with one point so far. Sel Appa plays Equestrian States and that means that at least one of our direct competitors is going to drop points.

Ko-orenite Sports Encyclopedia - 9th Winter Olympics edition
Baseball

The league
The national baseball league, or Ko-orenite Baseball League, or KBL, has not changed much since its first season. While the first two seasons have been mostly lost to the ages, the following 11 seasons have all been well-documented. Not that much changed at all: we have asked a few people who were around at the time of seasons 1 and 2, and all teams that we currently have in the league are all the teams that we had in season 1 and season 2. The KBL has a fairly standard two-conference, 108 game season, which is always followed by the playoffs. With ten teams per conference, we first have the 5-10 series, in which the fifth-placed teams play each other, the sixth-placed teams play each other, etcetera. The top four of each conference, eight teams in total, qualify for the playoffs. These are the teams in the top four places of both conferences in season 3: the Golden Generals, Sun’s Regents, Silver Admirals and Flying Dragons for the Northwest, and the Vintage Cowboys, Lava Bearers, Classy Farmers and Charging Hounds for the Southeast. These are the teams qualifying for the playoffs in season 13: the Golden Generals, Silver Admirals, Jeweled Challengers and the Sun’s Regents for the Northwest, and the Lava Bearers, Charging Hounds, Vintage Cowboys and the Premium Originals for the Southeast. If nothing stands out to you, read those names again. That’s right, in 10 seasons time, six out of eight are the same. Which brings us to parity: for such a big league (internationally: the KBL has ranked 1st out of all leagues numerous times) that attracts so many viewers, people who like the Moving Castles or the Machine Reds surely do not have much to be happy about. Secondly, with the same teams advancing every time, we see largely the same teams qualifying for the BCCC and building up momentum to do the same thing next year. Basically, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.

On top of that, the few initiatives for feeder leagues, or minor regional leagues, never really got off the ground. We have seen a season of minor leagues (up to season 13), but season 14 is not scheduled to feature regional leagues anymore. Of course, professional players already do not make much more than a living in Ko-oren, so it is not quite viable to have a professional minor league, or even a semi-professional one, but many people would love to see more local heroes involved in the popular sport.

For that reason, the Baseball League structure is going to be mixed up for Season 14. There will be six regional conferences with six teams each, with games taking place within the conference. This reduces costs for both fans and the team to travel to far places, and there will be national playoffs after the conference phases. Most teams that do not make the playoffs will not likely be professional teams anyway, so just the paid pros should be involved in the national finals. The conference phase will take roughly four to five months, with 100 games per team. In the national finals, which will also take about four to five months, the teams that are left over will play each other in strings of three: if the Golden Generals play at the Silver Admirals, the away team just stays near the home team’s city for three days, playing three games in three days. This will constitute to another 66 games, or more simply: each team plays each other team six times, three times at home and three times away.

The teams included here will be:

Northeast	Golden Generals	Jeweled Challengers	Lokomotiv Avka	Dynamo Tosk	Schwarzadler	Nandao Cuilü
Batavophone	Zilveren Admiraals	Blauwe Leeuwen	Vuurwagens	HV Sraltlur ‘60	Kolkath Piraten	Enkl Stedelingen
Anglophone	Mounted Knights	Senoren Blackhawks	Blue Rivers	Hillside Hitters	Ka Uin Quarry	Granovun Delta
Franco-Lusitanophone	Pays d’Egevea	Ours de Lave	Champs de Virarta	Branvun Penhascos	Os Faróis	Castundum
East	Sapphire Cavalry	Sepo Honmono	Asahi	Yuuyake Safurun	Changcheng Mosudi	Niislel Sishinoga
West & Southwest	Dragons	Charging Hounds	Lakeside Bards	Club Wui	Gnelseg Islanders	Tremtun Collection

The national team
The Greenblues are not the luckiest of all national teams. Once ranked 5th, they finished fourth in World Baseball Classic 26, after having no chance in both the semifinal and the third place playoff. Still, fourth place is still the best finish ever for a Ko-orenite national team at a large tournament (World Cup, World Bowl, World Baseball Classic, World Cup of Hockey, among others). We have come quite a while from this performance: after finishing fourth and being under huge pressure to keep doing well, the team imploded in Saintland and Maklohi Vai, losing against Strawbee in the playoffs (who, for some reason, went on to win the thing). Actually, Ko-oren made the second round with a 4-4 record! Every team in this group won four and lost four. So basically the Greenblues were the least suckiest of all sucky teams, all nicely collected in one group. Then we had WBC 28, which cut deep. Really deep. Deeper than anything before that. Despite having an active team, not very well ranked opponents, and some talented players, the Greenblues finished last in the World Corruption Classic. Eh, World Bribery Classic, to keep with the WBC abbreviation.

The team will probably continue to rely on Sayar and Abernethy for pitching, with the valuable input from some old-timers. The problem is that the team lacks an absolute star: the team, as it stands, is more than good enough to make the final 16 of the next WBC, but might lack something to make it past that point. Also, after falling so hard, the national baseball team might not end up with the public support it used to have.

by **Torisakia** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 4:54 am

**While I've lost hope for another playoff spot, I decided to at least post an updated roster**

Coach: Mark Bilbo(11th season) (Tokai Ice Birds)
STYLE MODIFIER: +5
NICKNAME: Ice Birds

Line #1
Ronald Dragarič/G/#5/AGE: 35 (ASFC Criminals)
*Cassidy McKenzie/LDM/#17/AGE: 21 (Postmeridian Firebolts)
Dimitri Roberazzi/RDM/#5/AGE: 26 (East Lake Jethawks)
*Jessica Holbrook/C/#11/AGE: 20 (Koradai Knightraiders)
*Kristen White/LWF/#0/AGE: 21 (Ciera Beauties)
*Patrick Kesteloo/RWF/#10/AGE: 27 (Tokai Ice Birds)

Line #2
Edward Stang/G/#16/AGE: 33 (Yasui Black Magic)
Doug Wade/LDM/#1/AGE: 29 (Port Tudor Konvicts)
Daren Rosales/RDM/#19/AGE: 36 (Blue Creek Bears)
*Lyndsey Reed/C/#25/AGE: 31 (Tokai United Knightraiders)
*Lucas Gerstan/RWF/#33/AGE: 33 (Andrea Silverbacks)

Line #3
Kevin Hautifi/G/#22/AGE: 25 (Fishmarket South Trojans)
*Daylon Orali/LDM/#2/AGE: 31 (Willis Valkyries)
Robbie Witter/RDM/#12/AGE: 35 (Suffolk Phantoms)
Jake Gaisdui/C/#7/AGE: 29 (Port Lavleo Sundevils)
Forrest Butler/LWF/#40/AGE: 37 (Addysl Rampage)
*Patrick Kesteloo/RWF/#35/AGE: 31 (Andrea Silverbacks)

President: Roger Collier
General Manager: Daniel Pedersen
Team Manager: Thomas Yandell
Marketing & Sales Director: Jonatan Danielsson
Head Coach: Mark Bilbo(11th season)
Assistant Coach: Erik Andersen(4th Season)

TBA

TEAM UNIFORMS

*Team will wear ALT on first matchday and ALT 2 on last matchday

RP INFO

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Y
Godmod scoring events: N
RP injuries to my players: Y, TG me first
Godmod injuries to my players: N
Hand out penalties to my players: Y
Godmod other events: Y (nothing too extreme)

*All players are willing to fight if provoked. The players with asterisks(*) next to them are the most brutal and most willing fighters.

by **Sicoutimont** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 5:12 am

The Edmundston Enquirer
Day 3 of World Cup of Hockey 23 Sees Sicoutimont Against Swibia

ST. PAULUS, SAINTLAND -- 1 day after Sicoutimont took a 7-4 victory over New North Aqmuland at the World Cup of Hockey, the unranked team took a big victory. They defeated the strong team from Qazox, in a tight 4-3 match. It was Sicoutimont later that day taking on another unranked team in Swibia at the Apostolic Arena. Of course, the question was asked to coach Michel Nilonier, do you ever think about upsets? "Personally, no. I believe that any team can win on any day if they play their best hockey, and that might be what happened today. We've just got to remember that we can't overlook anyone. The first game against Jeckland, we weren't playing our best off the start, we underestimated them, we got down 2-0. We can't let that happen if we want to go far in this tournament. And with those words, Team Sicoutimont entered game 3.

Not entering game 3, however, was Yves Lapierre. Still suffering from the flu bug, he was sent ahead to St. Ioannes with a team doctor to rest before the game with Torisakia. It is likely he will play for that game, and definite that he will play against Levivania. But the rest of the team was in St. Paulus, and Coach Nilonier had to choose a replacement for the steady defender. Leonard Rampart was chose once again to take this spot, after his heroic acts in the second game stopped a goal in the last seconds. Wearing their trademark blue and purple, Sicoutimont took to the ice. Just a few minutes later at the Apostolic Arena, the game began. Sicoutimont won the faceoff, and looked like they were winning the play early in the game. This culminated just 6 minutes and 22 seconds into the game. Seamus Sinclair's point shot was tipped down by Maurice Rolloton, and although the goalie stopped the tip, he could not stop Jean-Luc Desjardins on the doorstep. Almost in the crease, Desjardins had Sicoutimont's first goal of the game. Although Swibia killed off a penalty over the next minutes, Sicoutimont would strike once again. 12 minutes into the period, Lucien Beliveau stole the puck in the neutral zone, and began a 2-on-1. At the half-circle, a saucer pass across to Gaspard Richard, and a hard wrist shot from the latter gave Sicoutimont the 2-0 lead. Swibia, however, was not completely down after this.

Swibia's number 21 (A starting line-up was not made available) came in over the line, and with the 3rd line and 3rd defensive pair on, Swibia's snipers had a chance to score. The 3rd pairs killed the attack, and began to change. But just when they thought they were out of danger, they were pulled back in. Swibia quickly recovered, and a 4-on-2 ensued, with the 3 Sicoutian forwards chasing the play. Passing back and forth, they got the goal they were looking for with only 4 minutes left in the period from right in front of the net. It was 2-1, but the period was not over yet. Almost a few seconds off the face-off, Swibia lost composure, and took a penalty for hooking. Sicoutimont went to the power-play. About half a minute into the power-play, Jean-Luc Desjardins received an interception in the neutral zone. He rushed into the zone, and with the Swibia defence chasing him, buried the wrist shot from the hash marks. Ending the power-play, that goal also ended the scoring in the first period.

The second period didn't get much better for Swibia. Michel Nilonier's message for this second period was to, once again, take away Swibia's chances, frustrate them and take a lead large enough that the 3rd period come-back could not be found, as Swibia would be drained of energy from fighting in the second period. His team certainly conveyed his message. It was only 2 minutes into the period that they struck again. Setting up a play in the offensive zone, the goal came from the back end. Swibia tried to chip the puck out of the zone, but Seamus Sinclair blocked the chip and recovered the puck at the line. He passed to his D-partner Loic Lenouvre. Lenouvre wound up, but slap passed back to Sinclair. The next pass back to Lenouvre from Sinclair was hammered at the goal, but might have gone wide had it not hit the stick of a Swibian defender, which deflected it past the goalie into the bottom corner. The score was now 4-1. One more goal would come in that second period. When Julio Archambault received a penalty for slashing on defence, the penalty kill went to work. After killing the first 45 seconds of the power play, the 2nd Penalty Kill lines came on. The puck was dumped down the ice by Seamus Sinclair, but Guy Labaie skated in to receive the dump at the blue-line. He pressed over the zone, and faked out a defender, going around. The 3rd liner, usually a grinder, then buried a wrist shot to make the score 5-1. The assists on that goal came from Seamus Sinclair, his third of the game, and goalie Etienne Bouchard. That was the last scoring in that second period.

The second period was quiet for Sicoutimont, but nervous at first. The nervousness came from the fact that about 2 minutes into the period, Swibia narrowed the lead. It was definitely a goal Bouchard would like to take back, with the low shot easily stoppable. The puck, however, took a bounce under Bouchard's pad, giving Swibia a goal and making the score 5-2. Bouchard was able to laugh it off with his defence, and was ready on the next shot, but the fans at home might not have been so amused. Any thoughts, however, that Swibia would come back were crushed just 5 minutes after that first goal of the period. Jean-Luc Desjardins played a hard pass down the middle of the ice to Jean-Pierre Dandenault. Dandenault, now on a clean break, wound up and blew the slap-shot past the goalie. It was quite far out from the net when the shot was taken, and Dandenault had this to say later about the goal: "I don't know what I was thinking there, haha. I've been working on my slap-shot in practice, and I thought that it was a great opportunity to use what I'd learned. But I'd like to have that one back, honestly, I could've done something pretty rather than that, uh, thing." Still, it was a goal. Sicoutimont could leave the ice with a 3 game win streak at the World Cup of Hockey. Below is a chart made by our statistics department of goals scored in the game, and where they were shot from. It also lists the goaltender statistics.

The next game for Team Sicoutimont is against Torisakia. This strong hockey nation is ranked above us in the rankings, and it will be tough to get the 3 points. The team headed by train straight to St. Ioannes, and will practice at Progress Stadium tomorrow morning. A decision on Yves Lapierre will be made after practice. Lapierre, in St. Ioannes, said to our press that he was "Feeling better, you know, I'd like to play tomorrow, but it all depends on how I feel. Leonard's done a great job replacing me, and I hope I can get back in there and play just as good." It will be tough to take on Torisakia, and Nilonier is not sure Lapierre would get big minutes against the team. "If he's feeling good, he's playing. I won't start him with the 15 minute games he's used to playing back home, and Leonard might still get some time in the game." On the goaltending situation, he said "Etienne's a great goaltender. I'm sure he'd like to have that second goal back, but hey, we all have bad moments. He's our starting goalie, and he will be in the pipes against Torisakia." With the 6-2 win, Sicoutimont are the highest-scoring team in the tournament, 1 goal (16-15) ahead of 3-time champion Havl. A tough challenge is next in St. Ioannes from Torisakia. We'll have more from the 23rd World Cup of Hockey, in Saintland.

by **Lzherusskia** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 6:50 am

Home -> Hockey -> World Cup of Hockey

The Home Of Lzher Sports Since 2089

Goaltenders Duel For Sixty Intense Minutes
Akerman Shines As Quakmybush Stop Lzher Winning Streak At Two

A virtuoso performance from goaltender Roger Akerman was the difference maker in today's game, as Quakmybush rode their goaltender's hot hand to a victory that will only go down in history as an example of terrible finishing from both sides.

A kinder interpretation of the game might be to describe it as hockey's answer to the "pitcher's duel" in baseball, where both teams found themselves blanketing the opposing goaltender with shots to no avail and to whom victory would go to the team whose goalie made the least mistakes. Combining for just three goals in slightly under eighty shots, neither team's forwards covered themselves in glory today, and Andrej Reshetnikov was very vocal about the shoddy performance of the Lzherusskia defense as well, implying that changes would be made to the lineup for game four.

Surprisingly, in a change of fortunes from the previous two games it was Lzherusskia who struck first although, in a hint of things to come, the goal came as just as much of a surprise to it's scorer as it did to everybody else - Karl Myasnikovnik added to his team lead in goals scored with his fourth at the twelve-minute mark, uncorking a volcanic slapshot as he crossed the halfway line that sizzled past a stunned Akerman, but admitted later that he was actually only trying to dump the puck in to open up the opportunity for a line change.

That was to be the only goal of the game for our great nation, sadly, and after being perfect on the penalty kill through two games, it was penalties that killed any chance we may have had of taking something from the game. A rare offense from Sam Kasyanenko midway in the second - the winger was called for cross-checking on Doug Powers, a contentious call when replays indicated Powers was giving as good as he got - gave Quakmybush the chance for an equaliser that they leapt upon, Bobby Bjorkman pulling the trigger and firing past a sprawling August Pokrovski to knot the game up.

The first powerplay may have come in contentious circumstances, but the second was fully deserved. Alexander Trapeznikov had been his usual self and finally got a bite about halfway through the third period, riling defenseman Alen Fuchs to the point where Fuchs was given a game misconduct and ejected for a brutal elbow on Denis Vodypanov, but on his next shift, Trapeznikov was the flashpoint for a team-wide brawl that saw three more players ejected from the game and critically, Quakmybush issued a powerplay. With lead penalty killer Zino Nosov stuck in the box, Quakmybush exploited the weakness with brutal efficiency and Storm Novacek took less than thirty seconds to blast the game-winner home.

Despite the loss, other results going our way means that we maintain second place in the group. Hicana, who could have leapt to the top of the group with a win, were unsurprisingly defeated by Havl, who are 3-0 and have already put up fifteen goals - although, with that said, three titles on the trot means that anything other than a clean sweep of the group will probably be seen as disappointing by the Havl faithful. Reports indicate that the media in Hicana are going above and beyond simply supporting their team and are perpetuating the story that Hicana have won all three games thus far, scoring 36 goals in the process and shutting out Havl 5-0. Bless them for their optimism.

Quebec finally managed their first win by accomplishing the herculean task of defeating an unranked team, and let us be the first to congratulate them, last year's third-place finishers and the team ranked #10 in the world, for their truly astonishing accomplishments. Finally, their fans can look at the scoreboard and not feel humiliated that their team was outworked and outfought by a hungrier, keener and in the end, better opponent. Fortunes have not improved for Nova Anglicana, although only being defeated by one against #21 Svengarda is cause for celebration, and Maineiacs are still searching for their first win, held to a 4-4 tie by Yttribia.
BOX SCORE
1-0  LZK   12:33  Myasnikovnik (4)         Gelashviliev (2), Dolgorukov (1)
1-1  QKM   27:23  Bjorkman (1) [PP]        Tasker (1)   
1-2  QKM   51:17  Novacek (1) [PP]         Powers (1), Wruck (1)
THREE STARS
Third Star: Bobby Bjorkman, Quakmybush (1 goal, +2)
Second Star: August Pokrovski (L: 36/38, .947%)
First Star: Roger Akerman, Quakmybush (W: 38/39, .974%)
PENALTY SUMMARY
PEN  LZK   05:23  Yevdokimov, 2 mins - boarding
PEN  LZK   09:44  Veselovski, 2 mins - hooking
PEN  QKM   10:04  Lasse, 2 mins - cross-checking
PEN  QKM   11:19  Bonney, 5 mins - fighting
PEN  LZK   11:19  Veselovski, 5 mins - fighting
PEN  LZK   18:28  Karnaukhov, 2 mins - holding

PEN  LZK   21:36  Zavrazhinov, 2 mins - diving
PEN  QKM   21:50  Powers, 2 mins - high-sticking
PEN  LZK   26:18  Kasyanenko, 2 mins - cross-checking
PEN  QKM   33:34  Bjorkman, 2 mins - roughing
PEN  LZK   33:34  Veselovski, 2 mins - roughing
PEN  QKM   36:15  Hayley, 5 mins - fighting
PEN  LZK   36:15  Yevdokimov, 5 mins - fighting

PEN  LZK   42:06  Shcherbatiski, 2 mins - hooking
PEN  LZK   43:56  Zhelezkin, 2 mins - boarding
PEN  QKM   47:37  Fuchs, 10 mins - gross misconduct
PEN  LZK   50:51  Trapeznikov, 5 mins - fighting
PEN  QKM   50:51  Hayley, 17 mins - fighting, instigator + game misconduct
PEN  LZK   50:51  Yevdokimov, 15 mins - fighting + game misconduct
PEN  QKM   50:51  Bonney, 15 mins - fighting + game misconduct
PEN  LZK   50:51  Myasnikovnik, 5 mins - fighting
PEN  QKM   50:51  Lawrence, 5 mins - fighting
PEN  LZK   50:51  Pokrovski, 9 mins - fighting, instigator + goalie leaving crease
PEN  QKM   50:51  Slane, 5 mins - fighting

by **Northern Sunrise Islands** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 7:03 am

Sunrisian Overdrive : A SHL Manager save of the World Cup

MrGamebreaker
Sunrise Gamer S
Posts: 13,584
From: West Mardi, MD

Three Game Recap
by MrGamebreaker » July 29, 2020, 15:11
As you all probably have noticed it already, my game is magical. Either that or the Sunrise's hockey is damn predictable. So after that loss where only Else Samath scored against Soviet Canuckistan, exactly like real life; we continue at Saintland for the next match against Vettrera.

VETTRERA
Now, I usually wouldn't be worried with Vettrera for much, but being cocky already took me my invincibility away. Now, while I predicted they would pull a Qazox, but screw around earlier, which they didn't yet; I'm sure we can get those points back later. Oh, well, back to the game against Vettrera. I'm going to try and bring them to game, lure them to a trap and then take full advantage.

FITNESS
Team was 100%, until it was shown that Jean-Guinevere Levesque got... a broken nail and that wouldn't allow her to play for whatever reason. However, when it came to the game, Levesque was available, simple as that. Go figure. Also, why the hell a broken nail would be an issue anyway?

MORALE
Ironically, the one player that I get a bad morale from is not even in the squad. Yubei Nagatomo (seemingly a far-away cousin from football's Nagatomo) has been dissing the squad whenever he can, it seems, just like in Real Life. Twat.

SCORERS PRE-GAME
The United Regions 4–7 Northern Sunrise Islands
Sharp (3), Delgado, Motta, Blanc, Samath
Northern Sunrise Islands 1-2 Soviet Canuckistan
Samath

The Official Team of Misters of the Sunrise Gamer Board
Mr. Gamebreaker - Mr. Hueman - Mr. Gentleman

Tuiuti
Carnival Sim Champ
Posts: 798
From: Carnival do Oeste, CA

by Tuiuti» July 29, 2020, 15:12
Something about you and your games is really weird.
As long as you can help our national team survive the McConnery reign, I'm all for.
This reminds me, what Sioux said about being left behind?
OLHA A ESTAÇÃO PRIMEIRA DE TUIUTI, ARRASANDO O CARNAVAL DE CARNIVAL!
SGB's Carnival Champion of 2019

LaNuevaHija
SWF Corner Fan
Posts: 13,029
From: San Jose

by LaNuevaHija» July 29, 2020, 15:13
@Tuiuti
It's always like that with him, we all know how his save files end up with some alignment to real life. This season, he's going a bit overboard, though.
<3 Familia De La Muerte <3

Kicking
Sunrise Gamer B
Posts: 13,221
From: South Mars, AM

by Kicking» July 29, 2020, 15:14
Well, I still have to say that underestimating Soviet Cannuckistan was a huge mistake even before the match. They're not like Qazox, y'know, not really last-minute failures.
Association of Rough Social Enigmas
Created by Kicking
Members: Dela, Masticator, Ratadobem, Hootiehoo22

TheTsune
Moderator
Posts: 34,053
From: Caen, KDE

by TheTsune» July 29, 2020, 15:16
Pretty sure Sioux's pissed that the current Mortiise actually one-uped him on the way to the roster. And Mortiise has been sucking for a while now. Dunno why he made your cut, Game.
Oui, oui!

MrGamebreaker
Sunrise Gamer S
Posts: 13,584
From: West Mardi, MD

by MrGamebreaker» July 29, 2020, 15:18
@Tuiuti
I wished I had a clue on why my save files end up having some sort of connection with real life. It's actually kinda funny, I'm thinking about playing my games before and betting on them for some Islander Dollars later on. Or they could follow my suggestion of turning it in the Vaporeon Pound or something.

@TheTsune
I have hopes that Mortiise suddenly become a badass and literally take the whole game by surprise. Plus, something about McConnery and Sioux in a relationship just sounds like a clean, soundly no.

GAME
Vettrera 2 - 5 Northern Sunrise Islands
According to the game, Jersey and Jones scored. It maybe could just be the game generating random names, since Vettrera didn't reveal a roster before the start of the tournament, so I'm not going to make predictions of the names. On our side, however...
KUNOICHI SCORED THRICE! Second hat-trick of the tournament, with Rougeau and Montabeaux making their presence felt. Took me a while to figure out why the main line was screwing around so much, so I ended up changing it with the bench and poof!

The Official Team of Misters of the Sunrise Gamer Board
Mr. Gamebreaker - Mr. Hueman - Mr. Gentleman

Move to page... [1], [2] , [3] ... [10]

by **San Jose Guayabal** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 10:20 am

OOC: The things related in this series is only for funny purposes, in ICly concepts, this doesn't affect the live of the people involved in this, because this is only for satirical purposes.

Down with GregoryisNOTgodistan!

Episode 1: Coconut madness!

A few days ago in Gregoryisgodistan, a lunatic idiot enacted a law which prohibits say the word coco, just because the "Dear Leader" does not like coconuts, for the love of God, whom you will not like a coconut, had to be an idiot like him!

The chorus chant:

"What kind of idiot is this leader, as he might not like coconuts, perhaps coconuts torment, poor fool, it overflows the ego, an idiot, for the love of God, this guy is a fool."

"Why not try one" says a counselor.

"Shut up!, I not competent, or you run" Cry the leader.

"No, please do not execute me sir, I beg you please not" Shout desperately counselor throws a coconut while the leader.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!, A coconut, cast it away from me fast while execute this impostor" ordered the leader.

"We'll take it and execute it in the square?" says one Enemy Crusher.

"Excellent, do it now" says the "idiot leader"

An officer says in the main square "People, come here, we will execute this man for throwing a coconut to our dear leader"

Suddenly, starts the execution song.

"Murder, treason, driving drunk, being naked, using drugs
Smoking, bathing, coughing, sneezing, owning bikes and cars
If you’re bald or shave your head, pretty soon you will be dead
Drinking anything but prune juice gets you killed as well

Sing the anthem every hour, do not ever take a shower
Bow to Lord Almighty Gregory or else you will die
Eating on Creation Day means that you will really pay
Execution means that you can kiss your life good-bye!..............

"You betrayed me, you was one of the most loyal counselor, and you throw me a coconut" says the leader.

The execution chorus chant:

As may be, you betray the leader, you must die, go to hell, you're not worthy of being in the prescence of the leader, and go to hell

"Execute it now" cries the leader.

These scenes are not transmitted due to its bloody content, therefore will relate the incident and put the audio.

The leader gives the order, and put the head of the subject near the guillotine, then starts screaming: Die traitor.

The leader gives the order and the guillotine falls on the subject, snapping his head and then hand him the head and body into pieces and seasoned then hand him a sandwich with meat and brains of slain subject.

The leader revels in the "food" then says.

"Yummy my good chef, simply exquisite"

"Thank you for your compliment, my leader".

Suddenly, a plane heading from San Jose Guayabal to The Royal Kingdom of Quebec suffered mechanical problems, so he decided to shed 50% of the transported coconuts.

The leader felt a blow and said, "Who hit me"

A counselor warned saying "Rain of coconuts!"

"Shut up or I'll execute your family" said the foolish leader.

And the Chorus chant:

And that you do not like coconuts, idiot leader, now until you fall from the sky, consider yourself lucky and if not, consider yourself lucky bad because your nightmare is just beginning with coconuts, and is far from complete, idiot leader, silly leader , go to hell, fu**ing scum. "

And so ends the episode of our premiere comedy, we wait for the next edition of "Down with GregoryisNOTgodistan!"

by **Florgania** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 11:04 am

OOC: A little late, I do apologize.

Florgania Hockey Association

World Cup of Hockey 23 Official Roster

Head Coach: Bob Schueler, 51

Line 1:
RW: Paul Gardner, 24
C: George Gautreau, 24
LW: Tom Lee, 26

Line 2:
RW: Danny Hosey, 28
C: Tim Melton, 35
LW: Bobby Johnson, 26

Line 3:
RW: Dan Dygert, 29
C: Andy Robinson, 30
LW: Danny Eisenreich, 24

Defense 1:
RD: Mike Baldwin, 37
LD: Scott Murray, 33

Defense 2:
RD: Mike Turner, 30
LD: Jim Krieger, 26

Defense 3:
RD: Jack Bailey, 22
LD: Rick Walker, 25

Goalies:
G1: Italo Pirkl, 38
G1: Junior Kleven, 28

Home Arena: Porter Ice Arena (18,500)

by **HopNation** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 12:39 pm

Day | Oppenent (rank) 		| Their Record
MD1 | Valanora (3)		(1-2-0)
MD2 | Vilita & Turori (9)	(1-2-0)
MD3 | New Wolfopolis (UR)	(0-2-1)
MD4 | Aquitayne (46)		(1-2-0)
MD5 | Vaugania (23)		(0-2-1)
MD6 | New Koln (UR)		(0-1-2)
MD7 | Cassadaigua (29)		(1-2-0)
MD8 | Gallund (78)		(2-0-1)
MD9 | Caek of the Wolfen (UR)	(0-1-2)
Mashers Record (1-2-0)Won | Lost | Tied

Hockey Special by Ringwald Griffinsmith and Orpheus Diomedes
First Win
Well the Mashers come away with their first win of their international play. It was a decent game, not great but a battle of unranked sides proved to be at least entertaining. The Mashers scored the lone goal in this game to give New Wolfopolis their first loss. This win also keeps HopNation in good running with the other top teams in Group 1. As for the game, well at least there we no major incidents for either team. We think coach Davila got through with his threats of suspension for anyone fighting for New Wolfopolis. But the Wolfpack did have a couple minor penalties to go along with the Mashers three. Both teams had good penalty killing units as the Wolfpack went 0-3 on the power play and the Mashers went 0-2 with their power play unit. Both the first and second periods went scoreless with minimal shots on goal in each of those periods, combined 10 shots in the first and a combined 8 shots in the second. The third period is where things opened up a bit and the two goalies, Joshua Goodson for Wolfpack and Lucas Pierre Faucheux for Mashers, both faced twenty shots in the third with Goodson giving up one. It really wasn’t his fault as his defense made a poor pass across the middle that was easily picked off by Robert Knutsen and put away for the games only score. With the way the game picked up in the third we think both of these teams have plenty of endurance for the schedule ahead, we just hope they didn’t spend too much on each other for their upcoming games.

Goal scorers for the Wolfpack:
none
Goal scorers for the Mashers:
Robert Knutsen at 13:32 of the third

So, again a quick recap of the game and now onto the next set of Mashers.

Line Highlights - Black Line
#85 Robert Knutsen – Knutsen is a 22 year old from Zorg and will play center on this line. He is the team’s captian and really is a true leader. He has a great slap shot and wrist shot, his passing is great too. The only drawback for Knutsen as a center is his face offs, he is good at them but sometimes often gets bounced by the refs for being a little over zealous so someone else often faces off when he is in. Diomedes has him as the number one center while I have him as the number two.

#85 Filat Yaroslav Matveev – Matveev or Veev as he’s known is a 24 year old from Gawkasneer and will be this lines right wing. He’s a speedy one and can out pace almost any defender he is up against. His major drawback is his shooting as he tends to try and shoot high almost every time which results in the puck going over the net or into the goalies glove. Veev is a good passer and we expect him to set up Knutsen very often. We both have him as the number two right wing.

#98 Connell Berry Nathanson – Nathanson who typically goes by his middle name Berry is a 21 year old from Bayern and will be this lines left wing. He is a mediocre passer and shooter, but is very solid in positioning and defensive play. It almost makes us think he should have been a defenseman instead of a left wing. We both have him as the team’s fifth left wing.

Likely Defensive Pairing with the Black Line
#22 Leopold Valentin Moreau – Moreau a 27 year old from Chinook will be on the right side of this pairing. He is not a big hitter but rather relies on his stick ability to win the puck. He is also very good at defensive positioning and rarely gives up any goals while he is on the ice. Both of us have Moreau as the number three defender on the team.

#05 Christian Sergeant – Sergeant or Sarg as he’s known is a 25 year old also from Chinook and will be on the left for this pairing. He’s the hitter of the two and should be considered the teams’ enforcer. He is decent at passing and shooting, with him having a very hard slap shot though it’s not always on target. Diomedes lists him as the number nine defender while I have him as the number eight.

Howe’s Howl
Well we would have liked to score more but a win is a win and this puts us in a good spot. We have a decent opponent coming up but I think only two more ranked, maybe three, teams left to play and the rest are like us unranked. We’ll need a few more wins if we expect to make it into a playoff or even the next round. I think we can do it, it will just take everything we’ve got, every game going forward. The guys seem excited to be where we are after these first three games and they are looking forward to what lies in front of them. We are ready, now lets go.

Match Preview – Game 4 vs. Aquitayne (46)
This should be a great match, with the Mashers playing well so far they are ready for the number forty sixth ranked team to hit the ice. They will need to look out for the Aquitayne captain and left wing Geoffrey Seigler as he seems to be their best player. They also have Richard Olsen on defense that is no slouch. In order to be successful in this game the Mashers will need to put a shelling on whichever goalie is in, Badalamenti or Manseg. We feel that HopNation has a real chance in this game, but Aquitayne will be a good team and could spoil this game for the Mashers and it would keep them contention, pushing HopNation down in the group. We are excited for this game.

Score Prediction – 2-2 as both teams try to stay in a good position in the group.

Well that’s it for us today, wishing the Mashers best of luck in their second game. Brew on! Brew well Hoptonians!

by **Estope** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 1:24 pm

"Jake, do you think they forgot about us?"

"I don't know Cindy, I'm just the camera man."

"Well it's 3 a.m. Estope time and they still haven't shown us. I've called about ten times but no one will answer their phone. Should we just head back to the hotel."

"Sure, why not."

....

"Jake, my room key isn't working."

"Neither is mine. Let me go check with the front desk."

....

"Well they said that we were only booked for three nights and our reservations expired."

"GREAT!! JUST GREAT!!! This is a total disaster. How could they have completely forgotten about us here?"

"I guess we're camping out in the van tonight."

....

[Meanwhile back in Estope]

"Wow, what an exciting day of tennis it was. And that wraps up our comprehensive coverage of The Lzher-Jeckland Invitational and our show today. This is Bob wishing you a good night from all of us here as ESN 14, the fourteenth best channel to watch sports here in Estope."

"And that's a wrap. Great job Bob. Keep performing like that and you'll make it to ESN 13 in no time."

"Thanks Steve. I always love covering tennis. I do feel like we are forgetting something though."

"Probably not. This is a slow sports time right now. Basically all 14 of our network channels are covering tennis right now except for us. We get stuck with televising foreign broadcasts of our hockey matches."

"That's what we forgot! Oh well, that Samantha intern is probably happy to have the night off. Do you know if we won?"

"Let me see... Yeah 3–1 over Anditia. And it looks like it was at Royal Square Garden so she finally got to be indoors."

"Haha. She always looks so miserable over there. Next game against Florgania we will have to remember to give them a little extra time."

"We'll just play that by ear Bob. No one probably even noticed. If we give them extra time we will have to cut something that people care about and we don't want that now do we?"

by **Havl** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 2:14 pm

World Cup of Hockey XXIII - Havl 3, Hicana 2

St. Augustinus – The three-time defending World Cup of Hockey champions faced their first close match at Civitate Dei Arena Saturday night as unranked Hicana kept the game close until the closing stages. The game, which marked #1-ranked Havl's first indoor event of the tournament, saw the upstart Flyers score early to put pressure on Havl to keep their undefeated streak alive. Curiously, the arena was seemingly devoid of any Hicana supporters, perhaps explained by a personnel controversy that nearly forced the arena to be closed for security purposes.

"There's something strange going on with [Hicana]," said defenseman Brian Beierle. "I mean, you can expect even an unranked team to have some fans in the crowd." The controversy surrounding the match was just the latest in a series of events that have involved Hicana and their propaganda campaign to convince their populace that the Flyers remain undefeated. "It's really terrible," said Havl team captain Justin Donndelinger. "These people traveled here to see hockey; to forget about what's going on at home, maybe. It's a real shame they can't see some hockey, even if they don't win every game."

Brady Anderson's goal in the 1st sparked a momentum change.

Unlike the past two games, which saw Havl dominate by five goals, the match against Hicana proved to be a test of the champions' mettle. "They came at us hard," said Havl head coach Patricia Donofrio. "Clearly they studied us and put together lines on the fly to match our strengths. Again, it's another match against a new opponent, and they proved to be quite a surprise."

Hicana goaltender Ryan Reagan made 40 saves for an impressive 92.5% save percentage in the loss. The Firing Squad struggled early in the game, failing to score a point until Adam Fleer's game-winner in the third period. Brady Anderson scored his first our the tournament to get Havl on the scoreboard late in the first. Donofrio experimented by putting the second line on the ice against Hicana's top line, which netted the tying goal in the second. "We have to innovate," said Donofrio. "Everyone here has seen us play our best hockey. Innovation is key for us to go deep in this tournament."

With the win, Havl maintains the lead of the Group 6 standings over 96th-ranked Lzherusskia. Coverage of World Cup of Hockey XXIII continues on HTVM Sunday evening as Havl faces unranked Maineiacs from Royal Stadium.

Box Score
1st 2nd 3rd Final
Havl 1 1 1 3
Hicana 2 0 0 2

Team Leaders
Num	Name			G	A	Pts
17	Justin Donndelinger	2	5	7
11	Adam Fleer		3	3	6
19	Jason State		2	3	5
2	Brian Beierle		1	4	5
13	Andrei Petrov		2	2	4
15	Martin Klerx		1	3	4
6	Sergei Skrbinski	1	2	3
8	Andrey Pasternak	1	2	3
14	Brady Anderson		1	1	2
18	Juna Mossil		0	2	2
9	Brian Demerson		1	0	1
10	Joey Kaminski		0	1	1
3	Petr Zaradnik		0	1	1
16	Cooper Sullivan		0	1	1
36	Jay Marshall		0	0	0
12	Taro Tsujimoto		0	0	0
77	Tomas Holicek		0	0	0
7	Trevor Ventham		0	0	0 
Num	Name		GP	W	L	T	GA	SA	GAA	S%	SO
29	Davis Rich	3	3	0	0	4	61	1.33	93.4	0 
30	Ty McLaren	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0	0

Scores and Schedule
Thursday, February 6		₁Havl 6 @ ₄₄Nova Anglicana 1 [Progress Stadium]	
Friday, February 7		₃₆Quakmybush 1 @ ₁Havl 6 [Via Damascus Stadium]
Saturday, February 8		₁Havl 3 @ _URHicana 2 [Civitate Dei Arena]
Sunday, February 9		₁Havl @ _URMaineiacs [Royal Stadium]
Monday, February 10		₉₆Lzherusskia @ ₁Havl [Civitate Dei Arena]
Tuesday, February 11		₁Havl @ ₂₁Svengarda [Via Damascus Stadium]
Wednesday, February 12		_URSan Jose Guayabal @ ₁Havl [Progress Stadium]	
Thursday, February 13		₁Havl @ _URYttribia [Apostolic Arena]
Fridaym February 14		₁₀The Royal Kingdom of Quebec @ ₁Havl [Apostolic Arena]

by **Transalpine Republic** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 2:32 pm

Sanctii Authorities Discover Glitch, Refuse to Correct It

Sanctii authorities have been notified of and have refused to correct a glitch in their computer systems that run the World Cup of Hockey 23, citing that a fix would be unnecessary. The glitch incorrectly described Transalpine Republic as fourth in their group after the second matchday, when in reality they were tied for third with Neu Engollon. The glitch, discovered by a Transalpinian computer scientist, was apparently caused by malware in the Sanctii systems. No group has yet claimed responsibility for the malware, apparently downloaded as part of freeware.

A glitch in the tables that determine who makes it to the playoffs would be of paramount concern because only the top three advance to the playoffs, and fans who fervently hope that Transalpine Republic's good playing would earn it a spot in the playoffs would be truly disappointed. "It would crush my dreams," said fan Becky Glossner. "I have been waiting for this moment for a long time, and a glitch that denies us of our rightful chance would be utterly deplorable."

After the third matchday, Sanctii authorities issued a statement saying that the glitch was "irrelevant" and that officials would review the tables generated by the malfunctioning program only on the last day to make sure that the results were correct. The statement left some Transalpine officials concerned. Transalpinian hockey team coach Ivo Böttcher says that if Sanctii authorities are willing to overlook a glitch at this stage, they might be willing to overlook a glitch on that last matchday. "In the runup to the Olympics, we're worried about elitism in the world of sport here in Transalpine Republic," he says. "This incident does not present a good bill of faith that Sanctii authorities will be acting in everyone's best interests. It seems that rank might be the only qualification in this tournament."

Böttcher, despite this, is confident in his team's ability. "I'm sure we can go out there and show the world how good we are and that we aren't just a bunch of country hillbillies."

by **Valanora** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 3:00 pm

Laborious Hawk looked on as the game unfolded, taking a spare break in his routine to take in the Calcuttas match. He was dismayed at what he saw, even though the result eventually fell the way of the Calcuttas. It was like looking into a mirror and seeing all of what was wrong with the Marauders, yet on ice. While ice hockey was not a sport he was familiar with to a great extent, it seemed so erie to see the same ailments that had taken root with the football team with the ice hockey team. He had been informed that the Calcuttas to had numerous titles to their name, but the last one had been over a decade ago. It was a very eerie and all too familiar scenario, one that seemed to be playing out through all of Vanorian sports. Once mighty teams brought low and unable to cope with attacks with any certainty.

What was the answer to this riddle though, was it that Vanorians were simply no longer able to dominate their opposition, had they become less talented than they were in the past, or had the rest of the world simply caught up and surpassed them in all fields? It was not a new riddle and he had asked himself these questions many times over in the previous few years, as it become more and more a pressing issue. Was it that their confidence, their slight arrogance, what humans would call swagger, so demoralised after those string of upsets in the various sports that their psyche was simply not the same? Could the intimidation that once supported the Marauders, the Calcuttas, and domestic clubs like Raynor City United no longer be an effect, could no longer be there at all?

There had to be credit where credit was due, the Vanorian sportsmen and women were not simply keeling over and letting it happen, fighting to regain that dominance and stature at every turn. The Marauders might have done it, with another third place finish in the World Cup and moving up to the second position in the rankings, but the answer if they could build on it as they had in the past remained to be seen. The upcoming AOCAF and World Cup would provide those answers far greater than any one tournament could do, since the legacy of his squad was not just success but sustained success the likes of which had never been seen before. It could argued that it still had not been toppled, despite there now having been an impressive three-peat champion.

Where the Marauders had the likes of The Holy Empire, Audioslavia, and the Polarians to deal with, it seemed that the Calcuttas had their rivals and foes in the likes of Havl and to a lesser extent, at least in the past, Gyatso-Kai, if he read the records correctly. Could their players and management team find a way to provide the answers that unlocked the secrets to success? A turn of success and run of fortune for the Calcuttas could potentially turn into that same run of fortune for other areas in Vanorian sport, as history seemed to indicate when one branch of the Vanorian sector was successful, all became successful.

They would perhaps need a catalyst though, even more than tying those first two matches and getting off lucky against Gallund in the match he watched. Was there time though, time enough for that to happen? That AOCAF was set to begin very shortly and the national team expected him to be there in Kinitaria by weeks end. Yet would a stop by the dressing room and giving them a pep talk, give them the surprise of their lifetime and set about a good mood for the team? Well.. there was always the private jet...

by **Sangti** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 3:32 pm

KONSEHONG PAMPALAKASAN NG MAHARLIKANG BARANGAY
The Royal Barangay Sports Council

To the organizers of the World Cup of Hockey,

The Konsehong Pampalakasan ng Maharlikang Barangay, abbreviated as KPMB, is the highest sporting body of The Royal Barangay. The council governs the development of sport in the nation, focusing in the fields of football, basketball, baseball, handball, and rugby union among others. The council strives to aid on the development and excellence of Barangayans in the every sport that they enter. We acknowledged our intent to enter the World Cup of Hockey 23, hosted by Saintland. We are aware that the groupings have already been drawn, with us playing in Group B in various sporting venues.

We have received information that one of our group opponents, Perlasilangan, will play the entirety of their matches in just one venue; The Royal Stadium Rink 2, which poses a major unfair advantage, due to the fact that they will acclimate themselves to the rink game by game. This was the probable cause of their perfect start of the competition - three games and three wins in the bag. Additionally, there are nine, yes, nine games in the group stages, so all of these are possible scenarios. We will face them at matchday five of the competition, and we demand the organizers to shift the venue of our game to a venue not named Royal Stadium Rink 2.

Should or request not granted, we might stage a boycott of the competition by all means, including the pullout from the tournament.

We are hoping for your response regarding this matter.

SIgned,

Pedrito Mariano
Chairperson, KPMB

Noted,

Antonio Arias
Gran Supremo of the Royal Barangay
Chief of staff, Hukbong Sandatahan ng Maharlikang Barangay

by **Perlasilangan** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 4:03 pm

ANG BAGWIS
Opisyal na pahayagan ni Aguiluz
English Edition

HEAT RETENTION
Perlasilangani Hockey still perfect; will face Jeckland in Matchday Four
by Aguiluz

ST. PETRUS, SAINTLAND - If you haven't know it yet, be surprised.

The Perlasilangani Hockey Team are still unbeaten in the World Cup of Hockey 23, thanks to two possible reasons - three games in the same venue, and the RubberChick acquisitions from The Royal Barangay which is, ironically, one of our group opponents in the competition. After registering two 5-3 wins against Torisakia and Frusennia, they managed to eke a 3-2 victory against Levivania, to improve to 3-0-0 and 9 points, tied with group leaders Sicoutimont.

For our next match against Jeckland, two more rubber chickens courtesy of RubberChick of Super-Llamaland will be offered to the Goddess of Randomness, Margaret in Santos-Garcia. Although this action is prohibited in Saintland, the players will hope that the offering would give them boost to retain their form and hopefully qualify for the playoffs.

Another bizarre event is that the KPMB logded a formal protest on our home games. They are just plain bitter that they failed to beat their opponents - and failed to score too. So to the organizers, just ignore that petty request from TRB.

Visit my page @AguiluzPSL for more updates here.

by **Saintland** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 5:24 pm

Results for MD4

Group 1
New Koln 3–3 Vaugania
HopNation 3–3 Aquitayne
Cassadaigua 1–1 New Wolfopolis
Gallund 3–2 Vilita & Turori
Caek of the Wolfen 0–3 Valanora

   Group 1                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
 1 Gallund                          4   3  0  1    8   6  +2    9
 2 Valanora                         4   2  2  0   15  11  +4    8
 3 Aquitayne                        4   1  3  0    8   6  +2    6
 4 HopNation                        4   1  3  0    9   8  +1    6
 5 Cassadaigua                      4   1  3  0   10   9  +1    6
 6 Vilita & Turori                  4   1  2  1   10  10   0    5
 7 Vaugania                         4   0  3  1    8   9  −1    3
 8 New Wolfopolis                   4   0  3  1    6   7  −1    3
 9 New Koln                         4   0  2  2    6   9  −3    2
10 Caek of the Wolfen               4   0  1  3    2   7  −5    1

Group 2
Perlasilangan 0–1 Jeckland
New North Aqmuland 3–4 Frusennia
Swibia 0–1 Qazox
Torisakia 2–0 Sicoutimont
Levivania 2–1 The Royal Barangay

   Group 2                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
 1 Sicoutimont                      4   3  0  1   16  10  +6    9
 2 Perlasilangan                    4   3  0  1   13   9  +4    9
 3 Qazox                            4   3  0  1   13  11  +2    9
 4 Levivania                        4   2  1  1    7   5  +2    7
 5 Frusennia                        4   2  0  2   11  12  −1    6
 6 Torisakia                        4   1  2  1    5   5   0    5
 7 The Royal Barangay               4   1  2  1    2   2   0    5
 8 Jeckland                         4   1  0  3    7   9  −2    3
 9 New North Aqmuland               4   1  0  3   11  15  −4    3
10 Swibia                           4   0  1  3    3  10  −7    1

Group 3
Equestrian States 1–0 Sel Appa
Anditia 5–6 Westbridge
Florgania 2–3 Estope
Ko-oren 3–0 Kinzar
Saintland 4–4 Howdeellow

   Group 3                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
 1 Ko-oren                          4   4  0  0    8   1  +7   12
 2 Estope                           4   3  0  1   10   5  +5    9
 3 Equestrian States                4   3  0  1    5   1  +4    9
 4 Westbridge                       4   2  0  2   11  12  −1    6
 5 Sel Appa                         4   2  0  2    5   7  −2    6
 6 Florgania                        4   1  2  1    7   6  +1    5
 7 Howdeellow                       4   1  2  1    8   9  −1    5
 8 Anditia                          4   1  0  3   12  12   0    3
 9 Saintland                        4   0  1  3    6  11  −5    1
10 Kinzar                           4   0  1  3    1   9  −8    1

Group 4
Super-Llamaland 0–0 Nassau-Hessen
Crystal Empire 0–2 Gyatso-Kai
Falcus 1–2 Neu Engollon
Mohawk Clans 0–1 The Fair Republic
Middleton Valley 4–0 Transalpine Republic

   Group 4                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
 1 Gyatso-Kai                       4   3  1  0   11   5  +6   10
 2 Neu Engollon                     4   3  1  0   12   8  +4   10
 3 Mohawk Clans                     4   3  0  1    4   1  +3    9
 4 Middleton Valley                 4   2  1  1    7   3  +4    7
 5 The Fair Republic                4   2  1  1    4   3  +1    7
 6 Falcus                           4   1  2  1    6   6   0    5
 7 Transalpine Republic             4   1  1  2    5   9  −4    4
 8 Nassau-Hessen                    4   0  1  3    5   9  −4    1
 9 Super-Llamaland                  4   0  1  3    0   5  −5    1
10 Crystal Empire                   4   0  1  3    6  11  −5    1

Group 5
Gregoryisgodistan 0–0 Northern Sunrise Islands
Darmen 4–3 Vettrera
Oralana 0–1 Soviet Canuckistan
Arkiasis 2–2 The United Regions
Free Republics 0–1 Cosumar

   Group 5                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
 1 Soviet Canuckistan               4   3  1  0    6   3  +3   10
 2 Cosumar                          4   3  0  1    6   3  +3    9
 3 Northern Sunrise Islands         4   2  1  1   13   8  +5    7
 4 Gregoryisgodistan                4   1  3  0    3   0  +3    6
 5 Oralana                          4   2  0  2    6   4  +2    6
 6 Darmen                           4   2  0  2    9   9   0    6
 7 Arkiasis                         4   1  2  1    3   4  −1    5
 8 The United Regions               4   1  1  2    9  12  −3    4
 9 Vettrera                         4   0  2  2    6  10  −4    2
10 Free Republics                   4   0  0  4    1   9  −8    0

Group 6
Maineiacs 2–5 Havl
Lzherusskia 2–3 Hicana
Svengarda 2–0 Quakmybush
San Jose Guayabal 2–2 Nova Anglicana
Yttribia 4–4 The Royal Kingdom of Quebec

   Group 6                        Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
 1 Havl                             4   4  0  0   20   6 +14   12
 2 Hicana                           4   2  1  1    9   7  +2    7
 3 Svengarda                        4   2  1  1    4   3  +1    7
 4 Yttribia                         4   1  3  0   10   8  +2    6
 5 Lzherusskia                      4   2  0  2    9   9   0    6
 6 The Royal Kingdom of Quebec      4   1  2  1   11   9  +2    5
 7 Quakmybush                       4   1  1  2    5  11  −6    4
 8 San Jose Guayabal                4   0  3  1    8  11  −3    3
 9 Maineiacs                        4   0  2  2   10  15  −5    2
10 Nova Anglicana                   4   0  1  3    6  13  −7    1

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 6:15 pm

OOC: Real Husbands of Saintland is a reality TV show in Gregoryisgodistan. Like all reality TV programs, it is incredibly unrealistic.

Preview of Season 2 Premiere of Real Husbands of Saintland

Season 2 of Real Husbands of Saintland starts Monday night. If you're wondering what the episode is about, TVFun.com has the answers. We think it is quite a good episode and that anyone in Gregoryisgodistan will enjoy it.
WARNING: SPOILERS FOLLOW. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!!

It has now been two months since Petrus (no relation to the man who was then Prince of Saintland) legally killed his 15th wife of the 15 episode season. This wife was named Martha, and it was perfectly legal for Petrus to kill her because she walked outside without a head covering to pick up a package that was left on the doorstep while Petrus was at work. It turns out the employee of "Sanctii Parcel Services" was really a spy hired by Petrus to trick Martha into coming out of the house without a head covering. As you know by now, Petrus believes it is man's duty to subjugate women. If women refuse to be subjugated, they must die. That is what Petrus believes. After the spy informs Petrus of Martha's sins, and provides photographs, Petrus heads home from his job in the Church of Saintland's local offices in a fit of rage. He pulls out an ax and beheads her. That's where Season 1 ends, in case you forgot.

Season 2 starts out a couple months later, and Petrus is still looking for a new wife. Nobody wants to marry him after he killed 15 women in 15 weeks. Even though all the killings were legal, no woman wants to marry him. They all fear him greatly. Petrus is proud, yet lonely. Meanwhile, King Paulus XV has been killed by a Gregoryisgodistani death squad (OOC: propaganda) and been replaced by his son, now King Petrus XX. The fact that the new king has the same name as him feeds Petrus' ego even more. He consults with his friend Marco and decides he will invoke an ancient Sanctii law that has not yet been repealed. If a woman is in the pillory, any man who has the same name as the King may approach her and force her to marry him. This law was, according to Petrus, created by an obscure act in 1813, but was never noticed or repealed until just that moment when Petrus realizes it exists. Two days later, a woman named Iona Julius is sentenced to three days in the pillory for the crime of singing in the shower. Women are not allowed to sing in Saintland unless they are wearing appropriate attire. Iona was naked when she was showering, as you might expect. So this is not appropriate attire and she was sentenced to three days in the pillory without food or water. (Women are not allowed to be naked anywhere in Saintland. Technically, this would include showers, but no woman has ever been sentenced to the pillory for being naked in her own shower. However, Petrus did legally kill his ninth wife of Season 1, Josephina, for this "crime.") Six hours into her sentence, Petrus approaches Iona and invokes the King's Name Pillory Marriage Act of 1813. He then frees her from the pillory but forces her to marry him.

Iona resists and calls the Sanctii police, begging to be put back in the pillory rather than marry this man who is a serial wife legal killer. At first, the police do not believe this law exists, as it sounds rather ridiculous. However, Petrus takes the officers to the Hall of Public Records and shows the declaration filed away. So the officers are forced to let him go. Petrus then marries Iona against her will. She cries during the whole wedding, after which Petrus savagely beats her, leaving her with bruises all over her body and covered in blood, but still alive. This is legal in Saintland.

Then, the episode flashes back to shortly after Petrus XX became king. The commoner Petrus is seen writing a document on very old parchment. He then signs it with a flurry of a quill, after dipping it in ink. This should strike the viewer as strange, because Saintland currently has computers Petrus could use to type the document. Even if it had to be handwritten for whatever reason, Petrus could easily have used a pen. The Sanctii aren't that old-fashioned.

The camera then zooms in and reveals that Petrus has, in fact, forged the King's Name Pillory Marriage Act of 1813. There was no such obscure declaration by the King. It then shows Petrus handing the document to Marco, who works at the Hall of Public Records. Marco then goes into the Declarations Room and files it with the other declarations issued in 1813. Marco then heads back out to Petrus and reports that the deed has been done.

The screen then suddenly cuts to black as the episode ends. The viewer now has many other questions - how many other laws allowing Petrus to kill his numerous wives did Petrus forge by pretending to be former Kings and giving them to his friend Marco to file away? Perhaps all of them, perhaps none, perhaps only some. We don't know for sure. What we do know is that at least some of our questions will be answered next week on Real Husbands of Saintland.

by **Super-Llamaland** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 6:41 pm

Group 4
Super-Llamaland 0–0 Nassau-Hessen
Crystal Empire 0–2 Gyatso-Kai
Falcus 1–2 Neu Engollon
Mohawk Clans 0–1 The Fair Republic
Middleton Valley 4–0 Transalpine Republic

Group 4 Pld W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 Gyatso-Kai 4 3 1 0 11 5 +6 10
2 Neu Engollon 4 3 1 0 12 8 +4 10
3 Mohawk Clans 4 3 0 1 4 1 +3 9
4 Middleton Valley 4 2 1 1 7 3 +4 7
5 The Fair Republic 4 2 1 1 4 3 +1 7
6 Falcus 4 1 2 1 6 6 0 5
7 Transalpine Republic 4 1 1 2 5 9 −4 4
8 Nassau-Hessen 4 0 1 3 5 9 −4 1
9 Super-Llamaland 4 0 1 3 0 5 −5 1
10 Crystal Empire 4 0 1 3 6 11 −5 1

Todd: I think we'll be last
Jim: Still, BETTER THAN HAVL!
Dennis: Yeah, I'm starting to wish we'd do that
Jim: So, according to Hicana, they beat Lzherusskia 15-4 to keep first. They are in second though.
Dennis: Ridiculous.
Todd: (almost) BETTER THAN HAVL!
Jim: Rec'd for the lolsies
Carl: The rec features on forums really suck
Dennis: Double-click on the name, find their post on "recent posts", find that.
Carl: Srsly?
Dennis: I am lol
Jim: Dennis. You suck at acronym grammar
Dennis: I've rofl
Carl: Stop. please
Todd: Stop, Dennis.
Dennis: R u sirus
Dennis: LOLLING
Jim: Help, Forum Paramedics! Dennis is lolling!
Carl: Y so off topic
Dennis: Y Y Y
Carl: Such a boring game. At least we aren't last.

by **Nassau-Hessen** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 7:49 pm

Eagles Take Eye Off The Puck In Supposedly Easy Game

The Eagles, whom seemed to be in the clear after maintaining an acceptable pace after playing some of their divisions top teams, ended up tying the Llamaland Ice Tigers, a team whom sat in the cellar just as the Eagles. Many people know, however, that fine wine ferments within the cellar, waiting to reap the fruits of its' patience at any time.

The Eagles started out in a strong fashion, punishing the extremely defensive oriented Tigers with 16 shots in the first period. Backup goalie Lewis Carter was playing spectacular, making few mistakes and capitalizing on the shooters' errors. The Eagles had many chances shut down by him, and the Eagles came away in the first with a big fat bowl of nothing.

The Ice Tigers started to make some progress in the second successfully breaking up the Hessian defense in order to make a breakaway (the recipient of the opportunity was Carlos Fernandez), but the shot was expertly putted away by a timely placed poke check by Jacob Anders. The Eagles received a power play with six minutes left in the period, and punished Carter even further, putting up six shots in forty seconds. The real show began when the power play turned into a five on three. Twelve shots and two crossbars later, the Tigers survive unscathed and wrap up the period.

The aggravation of the Eagles was topping out. The Red and Purple played the most aggressive in the third. This got them a few trips to the sin bin. The ferocity of the Eagles continued despite that, and even through the Tigers did almost score within that drive, they let in a short handed breakaway from the one and only Gustav Hjalmerson, whom was rejected by a game changing save by Carter. The end result was good for one and even more frustrating for another. The positive is that both teams now have points.

The Eagles thirst for a victory will be evermore quenchable with a date against the Crystal Empire in Civitate Dei Arena. The Crystal Empire, with the exception of the Ice Tigers, are the sole team below the Eagles. The Hessians are prepared to go very long lengths in order to secure a victory.

(2/6) @ Fair Republic @ Progress Stadium L 0-1
(2/7) v. Neu Engollon @ Via Damascus Stadium L 2-3
(2/8) @ Gyatso Kai @ Civitate Dei Arena L 3-5
(2/9) @ Super Llama Land @ Royal Stadium Rink 2 T 0-0
(2/10) v. Crystal Empire @ Civitate Dei Arena
(2/11) @ Falcus @ Via Damascus Stadium
(2/12) v. Mohawk Clans @ Progress Stadium
(2/13) @ Middleton Valley @ Apostolic Arena
(2/14) v. Trans Alpine Republic @ Apostolic Arena

by **Estope** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 8:35 pm

"This is Bob Grater with the Daily Recap, highlighting all of Estope's sporting events from earlier today. It appears in yesterday's program we forgot to mention our hockey team who won their game against... umm.. someone. We will go to our on the ground reporter who is covering the Estope national team in Saintland. Samantha take it away."

"Bob. How long have we been doing this segment of the show?"

"Oh you're looking rough there Sam."

"I'm looking rough am I? Maybe because we slept in the van last night but I'll get to that later, just answer the question: How long have we been doing this segment together?"

"This is the fourth day. Why?"

"Because you should know by now that my name is Cindy, not Samantha. And actually this is the third day because you forgot about us yesterday. We waited and waited inside the arena to do our report. Then we were kicked out and so waited outside in the freezing temperature but still you never put us on air. There was no communication, we tried to call but to no answer. I am sick and tired of this *beep*ing *beep*. I work hard every *beep*ing day while you..."

"Cut the feed! Cut the feed! We'll be right back after this commercial break."

"Ok we're off the air now. What's the real problem?'

"Well maybe not booking us enough nights in the hotel is one, constantly referring to me by a different name after I constantly correct you, the list goes on and on."

"Ok, hold that thought. We'll get your your hotel rooms and work through the rest later. We're going back on air, just give the match report and then we'll go from there."

"In 3..2...1...and we're on"

"Welcome back folks. Sorry about that there were some technical difficulties but now we turn it over to Cindy in Saintland."

"Thanks Bob. Estope had a tough opponent today even though on paper it didn't seem as though it would be. Unranked Florgania gave Estope all they could handle at Royal Park before Estope eventually pulled away late to secure the win. Many found this to be a bit controversial but we'll get to the reasons why later on. Florgania came on strong early on and Paul Gardner scored for them just minutes into the game. This quick start was stunning to the team who had excepted to roll through this game. Estope was able to answer back on a power play goal by Elliott Tewari, although the penalty that gave us the power play was apparently pretty controversial. I'm not that well versed in the game to know what really happened but from what I could see it didn't look like much. Later on in the second period Alex Rookwood was able to score to give Estope the lead for the first time all day. It didn't last long though as Tim Melton was able to tie the game at 2 all just moments later. The two teams battled with neither team having an edge until late in the third period when the referee appeared to one of Florgania's defenders, Mike Baldwin, which allowed Brady Loynes to get the puck and have a uncontested game-winning goal. Bob Schueler, Florigania's coach, was absolutely furious but regardless the goal stood and Estope was able to walk away victorious. I was unable to identify who the referee was or from what country he resided so we will really never know what exactly happened or why. Estope nows sits second in the group and will face the group leader Ko-oren for the top spot in the group."

"Thanks Cindy. And we just received word from the producers that Estope's next game against group leader Ko-oren will not be televised here on ESN 14 but on ESN 10 instead. Hopefully this bump from Estope's fourteenth best channel to watch sports to Estope's tenth best channel to watch sports will allow more people to view this highly anticipated match up for first in the group. And since we ran over on this segment of the show I must regrettably inform you that we will not be able to show you the planned special on the rise of retirement home bingo but you can still view it online at our website. I can assure you that we will not waste this much time on hockey again so that we can instead report on the sports that you care about. Please stay tuned for more sports news after this break."

by **Qazox** » Sun Feb 09, 2014 8:50 pm

QOXSPORTS.com/Hockey

SWB 0-0-0--0
QZX 0-1-0--1

Jason Park's first start was a 38 save 1-0 shutout against Swibia, a win that moved Qazox into a 3-way points tie for first in the group. Park stopped 6 shots on net in the final minute, as Swibia had pulled their goalie giving them a 6-on-4 advantage, as Zach Marion was whistled for a delay of game with 1:19 left. Despite the advantage, Qazox held off the last ditch effort to get the win.

The first period was relatively sedate, as both sides managed a combined 15 shots. The excitement was a pair of topless women who attempted to run across the ice during a tv timeout. The women wiped out and were taken of the ice by security, to catcalls and cheers. Nathan Bradley, at 6:29 of the second period, scored the only goal of the game, after getting a pinpoint pass through a Swibian defender's legs from Peter Bauer.

World Cup of Hockey 23 - Everything Thread

Who is online