Baptism of Fire 53 - Everything Thread

by **Riojasia** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 3:12 pm

After the match, the team retired to their hotel. Once there, David Seaman invited the rest of the team to his room for a talk about tactics. He also called the concierge to see if a dry-wipeboard could be made available. "Now," he said, as they waited for the hotel to kick into action, "Tomorrow we are playing the New Lonopolian Empire. We played them before in the Aslan Cup but right now there is everything to play for. We won then and, if we perform hard and play well, we will win again. They are a good team so we need to do our utmost best." They were interrupted as two hotel members knocked on the door. Tom Devon opened the door and let them in, wheeling in a large wipeboard before leaving again silently. "Now the board is here, I'll pass you over to John," finished David.

"Ok guys, here's the deal. Last time we played the New Lonopolian Empire we won 1-0. This time we want a bigger win margin, anything to push us further up the table," started John. "There are 64 teams in this tournament, 63 have to lose. And as long as I'm in charge, I want that to be 63 teams that have to lose to us. I've reviewed the match report for the match against them in the Aslan Cup and there were too many holes. I want those filled in. Yorkie, you have to be more careful with your tackles. Last time you got yellow carded and gave away a penalty. Today you conceded a free kick. I like your energy but use it correctly. Seaman, you let in two today. If the New Lonopolian Empire has another strong defence, letting in two could have bigger consequences than today. I know you have it in you. Now..." he continued, getting out a set of markers for the board. "Let's get down to business..."

The team tactics lasted a good few hours, finishing a little after 6:30 that evening. However every player was ready and everybody wanted to win this tournament.

by **Southwick** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 3:25 pm

Why They Play: Part VI (Vicarius Duo)

"It is the sixty-third minute here in Deska and we are all tied up at 1-1." Following an early goal by Wobbly Clambanger, the Southwick team looked shaken. However, they pulled it together, and equalized just before half time on a shot from inside the box by Lucius Mesa.

"It has been a very entertaining match so far, to say the least," Ris added. The game had been full of near-misses, no calls, and even a short stoppage in play when a cast of falcons landed in the middle of the pitch.

"That it has been," said Grav. They watched as the Lymryker left back passed the ball back to the goalkeeper.

"Watts must be tearing his hair out about right now, though, after that near miss by Locklear," said Ris. Only moments earlier, a cross by Steve Groves found an open Locklear right in front of the goal. With the goalkeeper out of position, it was a gimme and Groves ran off to the side to start celebrating. But the ball glanced off of the top of Locklear's foot and hit the crossbar, bouncing out to a Lymryk defender.

Down below, Elias Watts was not, in fact, tearing his hair out, the reason being that he had a buzzcut so that was impossible. However, he was yelling at his players.

"Locklear, what the f**k are you doing out there?" he asked, raising his hands helplessly in the direction of the towering striker. "How the hell did you miss?"

"Paredes, clamp down on him, get him, F**K!" he said, as Anthony Bostick dribbled past the Southwick central midfielder.

"Bruce, why'd you tip that?" he yelled after Southwick's keeper hit a ball up over the bar rather than catch it. "Are you trying to give me a nervous breakdown?"

Elias sat down. The score was tied, but his team was being outplayed. "What the hell is wrong with them," he grumbled. "If only I was out there, I would be running all over these guys."

But he wasn't out there. He couldn't be out there. Elias' leg was missing.

20 years earlier

Now in the second year of his enlistment, Elias had gotten through the war without so much as a scratch.

Well, he had a little more than that, but nothing that needed treatment. Their opponents were mostly disorganized, failing to launch meaningful strikes in almost any capacity. Most analysts predicted that the war would be over within weeks. Elias figured that he just had to wait it out and then go back to playing footy.

"Men, we are going to be going on a raid today," said a tall man at the front of the briefing room. Major Jack Shapiro was a fierce nationalist who willingly volunteered his unit for the most dangerous missions. Most of the time, they were not granted as the unit was not highly specialized, but this time, it appears he had gotten his wish. Elias groaned.

"We will be venturing through the jungle here and ambushing a weapons convoy. This convoy is carrying a lot of ammunition to give to our opponents on the East Bank of the Maneo River. Without these bullets, that unit will be practically forced to surrender. Or, as has been this case with most of those idiots, fight to the death."

"The convoy should be lightly guarded," said the Major. "This will be a milk run."

A soldier raised his hand. "Will we be receiving specialized guns?" he asked. Most of the time, special ops soldiers were given access to weaponry that was more powerful, albeit more expensive.

"Well, since this will be an easy job, command has seen no need to give us any supplemental weapons."

"How about armor?" asked another one.

The Major chuckled. "There won't be any need for that," he said confidently.

11 hours later, Elias was crawling through a shrub. Prickers stung his face and hands as he propelled himself slowly, staying low to the ground. He was only about 10 feet away from the ditch where they would wait.

"Wait here," said Johnnie. He pushed himself forwards a few feet. "Looks all clear."

By luck, Elias and Johnnie had been assigned to the same unit. Living together, they had grown close through battles, injuries, stories, and long nights awake in the woods, patrolling for snipers.

"Finally made it," Elias said, pulling himself into the ditch. Slowly, the rest of the squad materialized in the pitch-black air. Elias and Johnnie were together in one hole, while the rest of the soldiers split off in pairs to wait for the convoy to arrive.

"Should be about 20 minutes from now," Major Shapiro said. He slunk across the ground towards the end of the line.

Elias sat back to wait. It was hard to stay awake in the quiet night and his eyelids started to drift together, before finally closing.

"Screech." Elias awoke with a start. He glanced up and noticed Johnnie pointing at something. Looking up, Elias saw a giant wheel about 20 feet away. The convoy was here.

"Whoosh." Elias' eyes jumped to a flare shot high in the sky. "Strange," he thought. "I don't remember that being part of the plan."

"Boom!" The flare exploded like a firework, illuminating the ground in front of them. Elias stared with horror as he saw the true size of the convoy. The train of vehicles looked like a moving fortress, complete with machine guns and grenade launchers.

"Shapiro!" he cursed, as tracer bullets lit up the sky. "What the f**k?" Elias pulled out his rifle and cocked it, starting to fire indiscriminately in the direction of the convoy. Grenades exploded around him and bullets whizzed past his ears, skimming his hair.

Elias tossed down his magazine and loaded another one. In this ditch they were mostly safe from bullets, so long as they kept their heads down.

"Elias, look out!" yelled Johnnie. Elias turned to see a shadowy figure running toward them. By the light of tracer bullets, he saw it was an enemy soldier.

"Elias!" Elias looked closer. The soldier had something in his teeth. He reared his arm back and threw it. The object landed in the ditch with a thud.

Johnnie sprang to dive on it. As Elias looked, he realized what it was. He ducked in the trench, scrambling to get out of the way.

Then, everything went black.

by **Alkoul** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 3:25 pm

ABN Soccer Review

______________________________International Play______________________________

The Alkoul National Football squad has started in it's first international play yesterday with a hard fought two-one win over Leintalun. Coach Mugs believes that with our play in the first CCAF Cup which was held in Alkoul, helped get the squad better pre-pared for international play. The match started off slow, as many people would have suspected after all it is the Baptism of Fire where in these new teams come from all over to get their first try in the big leagues. It wasn't till the after the first fifteen minutes when the heat started to turn up, Lather Simon of Leintalun ran down field past the only Alkoul defender to score a trick shot form nine yards out to score the matches first goal.

Alkoul fans were not very pleased as they swear that the Leintalan player had touched the ball with his hands, but after watching the score on the re-play there conceded. Though many people should know Alkoulians by nature are always suspicious of those who they don't know so well, so don't worry if any Alkoulian players accuse you of cheating. Then again if you are shame!

But that goal was the only of the first half, Coach Mugs made sure he told his players what he thought during the half. Because come second half it was like we were watching a whole different team, Forward Ceasar Fik, assisted by Mark Stumbles scored Alkouls first goal in the thirty-ninth minute. In the sixty-eight minute Jamie Per'loan scores only after the goalie slipped giving Jamie a great opportunity in which he took the advantage of. The rest of the match, both teams were trying to hit the goals but simply couldn't get the ball in, some of the kicks were close but well didn't go in. At the end the score was Alkoul 2, Leintalun 1.

Stats(Alkoul)
Kicks on Goal: 8
Scorers:
[39:28] Ceasar Fik, (Assist: Mark Stumbles)
[68:37] Jamie Per'loan
Yellow Card(s): 2
Red Card(s): 0

Stats(Leintalun)
Kicks on Goal: 11
Scorers:
[17:45] Lather Simon
Yellow Card(s): 1
Red Card(s): 0

_____________________________Domestic Leagues_____________________________
So here we are folks the first seven matches into the 2013 season, and guess what no surprises have happened. The top clubs are dominating, while the bottom dwellers are well doing as we had thought.

Alkoul City is ranked number one, they have the best offense, the best defense however all they're right now the best team and the one to beat come playoffs. Now when it comes down to the best conference everyone agrees hands down it's the North Conference. If the playoffs were to start tomorrow, three of Norths teams would be in, while only Cella United of the South would make it.

First lets talks about the North and their continued dominance. Well when we mean the North we're talking about Alkoul City, Pirre la Rivera and Ivy League, their three records combined right now are 12-3-6. That is stunning, these clubs have been for the past seven to eight years been the top dogs and the ones to beat and its no wonder why.

In 2009 alone Alkoul City spent an estimated A27.6 million in signing just three players; Pete Lorzen, Donald Asthro and Jaal Ashman and they have since signing accounted for 67 of the 137 goals that Alkoul City has scored over that time. In the 2009 APFL Cup Alkoul City faced off against cross town rival Alkoul City United and they were too much to handle for United, slamming them 9-1 in the second largest margin of victory in the Cups history. The largest came in 1996 when Pirre la Rivera defeated Cella United 12-3. Pete, Don and Jaal have since become known to all as the Big Three leading ACU to three titles in four years and it appears that it wont end any time soon. ACU is expected to win its fourth title in five years after this season, unless some other team steps up to the plate. 2013 prediction: 14-3-4

The team many believe that will is Pirre la Rivera, who since 2006 has been rebuilding after the Fe'leon sold the club to the Enbridge family for a lump sum of A178.4 million. In 2007 Pirre la Rivera suffered their worst season since 1966 when they ended 3-4-14 and were -26 in goal difference. However since that year the Enbridges have been investing big bucks into making Pirre la Rivera back into a winning club, and they did so in 2008 defeating Cella United 3-0 while having their best season since the 1999 season finishing with a 20-1-2 record. In PLR fans saw this as their time to shine for years to come, however since that '08 title the only title they saw was in 2011 when they defeated ACU 1-0. 2013 prediction: 14-2-5

Another team looking for a few high hopes would be Ivy League, they are the oldest club in the league that has never been sold or been moved into a new stadium. If you're looking for a club with a rich history and knows class Ivy League is the one for you. If you're looking for a room full of shiny trophies, then well you're out of luck. Despite not having won a league title in 46 years, the fan base is loyal and show their pride at every chance. Ivy has been in good shape for the past few years, so why not talk about them winning a title, well did you read the above? Look Ivy will continue to do good but I suggest that their owners do a bit more recruiting and invest more money. 2013 prediction: 9-5-7

Sigh. Sudd City, I don't know really where to start, the city wanted a team soo bad, they built the stadium, lowered the taxes and made massive improvements in their transportation systems the only thing they didn't do is get a few good players. Since the Chastone Razors moved to Sudd City two years ago they have compiled an over all record of 5-11-47. The owners, Mega Corp, one of two non-family owned teams has invested only A3.2 million overall. They are trying to do what Ivy League has been doing, only Ivy League spends over five million a year, not a million a year. Some one needs to find it in their heart to buy the club or else Sudd City will lose their team faster than it took to raise the funds to buy it. City Field which has a capacity of 29,800 so far this year its largest attendance has been 5,481. Look Mega Corp is losing money big time, and many do speculate that is what they want, they want to declare bankruptcy so they can profit from their and the cities loss. 2013 prediction: 1-3-18

by **Callumackbar** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 3:59 pm

Callumackbar win their opening game in the Baptism of Fire!

By Diana Allen

The victory was, in many people's eyes, a very one-sided match. Callumackbar dominating almost all of the game and Carialus not forging any real chances of their own. Callumackbar kicked the game off and, with barely two minutes on the clock, took the lead. A good pass on the right from Samuel Richards released Aleksei Olsson who tried to pick out Jesus Salazar but the cross was deflected away when it took a touch off Carialusian defender Barry De Brissa. The deflected cross fell to the edge of the area where it was flicked on with a header by Striker Mohammed Sakoura who headed it to his left to the arriving Jack Price, who magnificently volleyed the ball into the net. Callumackbar doubled their lead just five minutes later, Colin McGee finding Alexander Olsson on the left with a lobbed pass. Olsson took a touch then fired a low cross into the area, Salazar nipping ahead of his marker Kirstian Schafer to side-foot the ball past 'keeper Culpepper. With Callumackbar in such a dominant position at this stage of the game and Carialus only playing with two defenders, many fans seemed to be predicting a cricket score. However there was not to be another game during the half, as Carialus' players defended resiliently and held off the Callumackbar onslaught. Callumackbar came close to finding a third just before half time, Samuel Richards arrowing a shot wide from long range. Half Time: Carialus 0-2 Callumackbar.

The Second Half started much slower, Callumackbar not playing at as high a tempo and Carialus using their five-man midfield to close down Callumackbar's attacks efficiently, though the Admirals were still able to forge out a handful of chances. The first was from Lukas Shore, his curling shot being tipped around the post impressively by Culpepper. The resulting corner was curled in by Price, Hicks bursting into the box and heading against the bar. The rebounded ball pinged around the box before falling to McGee who shot straight at the Goalkeeper in what must be seen as a wasted chance. Any other way and it would have certainly gone in. Sakoura had a chance to get himself on the scoresheet along with his fellow striker Salazar when his strike partner played a good ball ahead of him which the young striker could only drag wide. The scoring was completed in the 81st minute, Salazar adding his second. Javik Adnyamathanha's Goal Kick somehow eluded everybody, allowing the striker to pop up and slip into a one-on-one chance, beautifully chipping the ball over the onrushing Culpepper. Full Time: Carialus 0-3 Callumackbar

Goalscorers
Callumackbar
Price - 2'
Salazar - 7', 81'
Carialus
N/A

Yellow Cards
Callumackbar
Weaver - 41'
Carialus
Fuller - 16'
Leleck - 67'
Baca - 73'

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 5:36 pm

Coach Slave CAUD87147 addressed the Gregoryisgodistan team after the game: "We had our chances today, and were it not for the call by that idiotic ref, we might have tied or even won. That should have been a clear shot on goal, not a foul on Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Joseph Hauu. I know you, you'd have probably made it. I'd say 95% chance. If that happens, it's 3-3. And we probably don't give up that fourth goal if we're not down to 10 men and desperately trying to score. It was a horrible call. You didn't touch him - he was faking? Right?"

"Yes, sir." Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Joseph Hauu replied. The replays shown all over Gregoryisgodistan TV seemed to make his case. To give him the benefit of the doubt, it's entirely possible the defender just got cramps, since he wasn't screaming at the ref to award a foul. But regardless, the ref blew the call.

After the game, the referee refused to comment on whether he still thought his call was correct. "Jut get out of here and leave me alone," Roy Cloen of Qazox told the international press after the game. When asked what he felt about Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Joseph Hauu shoving him to the ground, Cloen replied "That was a totally [censored] move. He should be banned for the game for life."

Meanwhile, the Foot Slaves were looking forward to their next game against Szkvara. Not much is known about this team, as they failed to send in a roster to be published in the media guide distributed to all the press from every country. Additionally, since they have never played a competitive match before, they are a major unknown.

Furthermore, the league office announced that Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Joseph Hauu would be suspended for the remainder of the group stage for shoving Roy Cloen, but would be permitted to return in the knockout stage should Gregoryisgodistan advance. Cloen called the ruling "far too lenient, like sentencing an ax murderer to 12 hours of community service."

by **Crystal Ponies** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 5:57 pm

The Crystal Courier
The Official Supporters' Newsletter of the Crystal Knights

FINALLY! THE CRYSTAL EMPIRE CLAIMS ITS FIRST VICTORY!

Crystal Empire - 1
Sapphire Rose '51 (Amber Waves)

Picts - 0
None

YUNGOITIO, ASTOGRATH - It may have taken them a few tries, but the Crystal Empire national hoofball team has finally done it. In front of a packed Gartzen Treko Stadium, the Crystal Knights defeated the mysterious team from Picts to claim their first win in nine international matches.

After the two blowout losses to the 22nd-ranked Ponies of the Equestrian States, many of us were distraught. How could our beloved players rebound from such crushing defeats? Evidently, all it took was a level playing field. Against one of the best teams in the multiverse, we stood our ground but were still totally overwhelmed. Against Colombian Britannia we were limited by their very hostile home-field advantage. But on neutral grounds, against a fellow unranked team, we finally were even.

The first half of the match was characteristically devoid of much action, as the Crystal Knights played conservatively and cracked down on the opportunities of their opponents. Amberlocks was brilliant in goal, stopping everything that managed to get by the superb defense of Arctic Lily. Without a doubt, the Crystal Knights showed their future opponents that their defensive prowess would not go unnoticed. So many of the team's best-known and most talented athletes come from the back half of the pitch, and they all were playing at an elite level yesterday.

But shortly after the match resumed for the second half, it happened, the moment our fans will never forget even if the Empire disappears for another 1000 years. Amber Waves stripped the ball from a Picts midfielder and launched it deep downfield. Sapphire Rose took control of the ball, having overpowered her mark, and drove into the box. One fake-out later, there was nothing in front of her but net. The ball flew straight as an arrow, giving the Crystal Empire just its third goal in the nine matches played by the team. But it was all the Knights' would need, and 40 minutes later, when the final whistle sounded, the party began.

While the Crystal Empire still has four matches left to play, the victory last night was an important step in the direction of a long-term successful team. Our team (and its fans) cannot afford to rest now however, as one win is nowhere near enough to claim a place in the next round, a fact which many of our opponents seem to be forgetting. We must continue to play as though the next match might be our last, for if we don't, it likely will be come the conclusion of the group stage.

by **Alitaba** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 5:59 pm

OPENING LOSS
Manggugubat suffers loss against Rabbitomia; vows to win remaining matches

The Manggugubat did not want to start this way - losing games.

The Alitaban National Team lost its first match against a spirited Rabbitomia side, 1-0 here in the Ituraitz Sporting Ground here in Astograth, that kept them rooted at the bottom of Group B. They will next face Furellum, who defeated Above Your Pay Grade 3-2, at the Silanes Park.

YihJiaw Doong scored the only goal for Rabbitomia, who is now in joint first in the group with Furellum. In the first half, there were many opportunities Manggugubat had courtesy of Donaldo Hinagpis and Renato Abad Santos. However, in the thirtyfifth minute, Doong ran past his defenders and shot a roller that went past Marcelo Katigbak for a 1-0 scoreline.

The Manggugubat tried their might to find an equaliser in the second half, bombarding the opponents with shots on goal, but Ozur Sorkvirson was on the task, preventing any goal from leaking in. Doong almost sealed the match in the 78th, but his shot deflected off the bar.

In the end, Alitaba failed to make its chances as they stumble to their first defeat of the competition.

The team was on the bus on the way to Silanes Park in Echegoyan. They needed to cheer up after a loss to Rabbitomia. Serafino stood up and rallied his players.

"Team. Are you just sulk there and not be optimistic? We only have one game done. We can win the other four and still advance."

"Against Furellum? they might be a strong side!"

"They might be, but upsets do happen. Wait. We have experience here. After all, we were in the Copa Rushmori and Market Cup. Isn't that experience to you?"

"Serafino, they also participated in the AOCAF. Lemesee, Three games, three losses, no goals scored."

"OK. Guys, we can do it. Trust me."

Although there were some that still sulked, the majority of the team cheered up in the bus, singing different chants on their way to the match against Furellum.

by **Vaugania** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 6:08 pm

VauganiaSportsToday

Meet the Players

Vaugania: 6 (Farnerud 17' 35' 68', Baltzersen 25', Vorotaev 45+2', Althusser 72')
Hardwinter: 2 (Unknown 29', Unknown 82')

On the first matchday of the 53rd Baptism of Fire, a total of 14 Vauganians took to the pitch against Hardwinter in the international debut for both teams. In the end the Golden Eagles walked away with a dominant 6-2 win and began to establish themselves as the highest octane offense in Group E. We'll give you a look at the 4 men who put up goals during the game and evaluate their performance.

Name: Joshua Farnerud
Position: Left Striker
Age: 21
Club: Blizzards FC
Bio: 3 years ago, Blizzards FC made a shock announcement that they would be signing a player from Tollefsen University who had just finished his freshman year. Generally, players don't get their big break until they have at least completed their junior year and players from Tollefsen even later, considering that they aren't considered to be a football powerhouse. Nevertheless, Blizzards FC took interest into this player who was clearly the best at the university and despite his youth, signed him on. It was big gamble put Blizzards is now reaping the rewards. Joshua Farnerud has become one of the most prolific scorers in team history. Often called "The Most Electrifying Man on the Pitch", it is rumored that there is a picture of him next to "athlete" in the dictionary.
Performance:The gamble made by Blizzards FC also worked out brilliantly for the national team on Matchday 1. He gave a great performance in Gordonopia City and put 3 goals on the board for a hat trick. He kicked things off in the 17th minute by swiping a pass from Hardwinter's center back and moved in on the goalie all alone. All it took was a quick chip and the score was 1-0. In the 35th minute, a long cross came in from Morten Karlan and Farnerud met it with his head. It slipped in just to the right of the left post and Hardwinter's goalie just couldn't get over in time. He completed the trick in the 68th minute by while under duress from Hardwinter's defenders. All passing lanes were cut off so once he found an opening, he fired the ball towards goal from just outside the box. Hardwinter's goalie was able to get a touch on it, but not enough to stop it from going in.

Name: Lars Baltzersen
Position: Right Striker
Age: 23
Club: Camp Kysten Athletic
Bio: When he was 20, Lars Baltzersen had just completed his 3rd season at Agri A&M. CKA liked what they saw and signed him to a fairly standard deal. It turns out the CKA got a steal when they acquired Baltzersen following his junior year. Baltzersen is a gritty striker and isn't much into fancy stuff. He works hard in the opposing goal box and is quick to snap up any rebounds. Whever a goalie isn't able to clear or catch a shot, Baltzersen makes it a point to be right there when it happens. CKA is going through som etough times, but they believe that Lars can be the foundation for their team for a long time.
Performance: Lars also had a pretty good game against Hardwinter. He managed a goal in the 25th minute to go up 2-0. Morten Karlan made a hard strike from the top corner of the goalie box and it deflected off of the post. Hardwinter's goalie bit on it just enough to get out position. Baltzersen took this opportunity to knock the loose ball into the open net. Though he didn't score on any of them, he also was very effective at putting the ball on goal during corner kicks throughout the day.

Name: Thorsten Althusser
Position: Center Attacking Midfielder
Age: 25
Club: Lindsborough United
Bio: Althusser is a born entertainer and the fans of Lindsborough United eat it up. His is the master of finesse and seemingly dances around his opponents. He doesn't have a hard, driving shot like Miloslav Vorotaev or Joshua Farnerud, but good luck trying to beat him in accuracy. Thorsten is also an excellent and just as accurate passer. Player polls say that out of any of the players in the Vaugania Premier Football League, the person players trust most with the ball is none other than Thorsten Althusser. You can be sure that the football is safe when it's at his feet.
Performance: Althusser was the 4th and final Vauganian to score during the match. In the 72nd minute, Hardwinter deflected a corner kick out of their goal box and to the feet of Thorsten Althusser. Althusser took the ball and weaved in and out to avoid defenders. After burning a third defender, he curled a picture perfect shot into the top corner. For the other parts of the game, he kept the Vauganian offense moving by containing the ball wrangling in the ball whenever Hardwinter attempted to clear it.

Name: Miloslav Vorotaev
Position: Left-Center Midfielder
Age: 22
Club: Datsya AC
Bio: Growing up in the Datsya metropolitan area, Datsya AC was his favorite club growing up. It was his dream to play for them and when he was 20, he turned down a big money deal from St. John's FC and took a more humble one with his favorite club. At Datsya, he has proved to be an excellent midfielder. Of all of the players at AC, he is probably the most offensive minded and least technical. Generally, the management at Datsya likes balance between offense and defense as well as high levels of technicality, but Vorotaev does neither. He muscles his way down the field and likes to hit big booming shots on goal rather than softer, high accuracy ones.
Performance: Vorotaev showed his colors when he scored a goal in the 2nd minute of extra time in the first half. Dennis Schmidt negated a last ditch effort from Hardwinter to get a 2nd goal before halftime. He moved the ball up field and played it ahead to Vorotaev. After one bounce, Miloslav fired a volley towards the goal and the keeper didn't have a chance. His game was much like this as he kept up the pressure and got Hardwinter's defense to crack.

by **Astograth** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 6:10 pm

Oh no here it comes

RP CUTOFF FOR MATCHDAY 2

I will also take the opportunity to make some brief comments and toss around some ideas based on the RPs I've graded today; focussing on making sure everything was correctly set up made me forget to do so last night. Remember this is all constructive criticism and definitely not a requirement for your RPing.

-There's nothing wrong with match reports, and if you're committed to truly making yours stand out perhaps you could put a unique twist on them. Who are they being written by, for example; is it a faceless journalist or an enraged blogger or even the president's personal diary?

-What happens before and after each match? Does the environment affect your players, maybe the pressure of tens of thousands spectating and millions more watching on TV? How do they get on with their teammates; are there club rivalries splitting them apart, or maybe they all remember each other from a youth squad?

MATCHDAY 2 SCORES - ASTOGRATH

Group A
San Jose Guayabal 0–2 Crystal Empire
Marcos Dynamite 1–0 Picts
Tatras 3–3 Myeeria

Group A                       Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Crystal Empire                2   2  0  0    3   0  +3    6
2 Marcos Dynamite               2   1  1  0    2   1  +1    4
3 San Jose Guayabal             2   1  0  1    2   3  −1    3
4 Myeeria                       2   0  2  0    4   4   0    2
5 Tatras                        2   0  1  1    4   5  −1    1
6 Picts                         2   0  0  2    0   2  −2    0

Group B
Alitaba 0–0 Furellum
Kavamkao 3–2 Above Your Pay Grade
Rabbitomia 1–0 Olastor

Group B                       Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Rabbitomia                    2   2  0  0    2   0  +2    6
2 Furellum                      2   1  1  0    3   2  +1    4
  Kavamkao                      2   1  1  0    6   5  +1    4
4 Alitaba                       2   0  1  1    0   1  −1    1
  Olastor                       2   0  1  1    3   4  −1    1
6 Above Your Pay Grade          2   0  0  2    4   6  −2    0

Group C
New Matawan 3–2 Leintalun
Welsh Cowboy 4–1 Alkoul
Ellesmerus 2–1 Estado Livre

Group C                       Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Welsh Cowboy                  2   2  0  0    8   2  +6    6
2 New Matawan                   2   2  0  0    4   2  +2    6
3 Ellesmerus                    2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
4 Alkoul                        2   1  0  1    3   5  −2    3
5 Leintalun                     2   0  0  2    3   5  −2    0
6 Estado Livre                  2   0  0  2    2   6  −4    0

Group D
Evisceratomatoes 0–2 Callumackbar
Åsløtten-Bëðerbørg så Česky 4–1 Carialus
Haute Savoie 0–1 Britanno

Group D                       Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts 
1 Callumackbar                  2   2  0  0    5   0  +5    6
2 Åsløtten-Bëðerbørg så Česky   2   2  0  0    6   2  +4    6
3 Britanno                      2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
4 Haute Savoie                  2   1  0  1    1   1   0    3
5 Evisceratomatoes              2   0  0  2    0   3  −3    0
6 Carialus                      2   0  0  2    1   7  −6    0

by **Southwick** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 6:17 pm

Why They Play: Part VII (Memoria Duo)

"Tweet. Tweet. Tweet."

The referee's final whistle blew, ending the game as a 2-2 draw.

"And that is a wrap here at Deska. A seventy-fourth minute goal by Flappy licks quid nowan... I don't know." Ris stopped, perplexed by the Lymryker name. "A seventy-fourth minute goal by Flappy put the Lymryk Isles up 2-1, but a late equalizer on a brilliant effort by Steve Groves drew the game level to where it ends now. Thoughts on the game Grav?"

"Well, it was a poor effort from Southwick really. If it wasn't for Groves' goal, Southwick could have been in real trouble in this group. They were lucky to escape with a point."

"And here is the replay of Groves' goal now. As you can see, he deked left, performed a turn, dribbled past Squinty, and ripped a shot to the low left corner, on the keeper's far side. Beautiful play by a player who will surely brighten Southwick's chances at this tournament."

"Yes, it is a beautiful goal indeed. We are down at field-level now with Mr. Groves. Andy?"

"Hello, yes, this is Andy Karelitz here for Sport, with me is Steve Groves. Steve, how do you think the game went for the squad today?"

"Well, it is definitely something to build on," said Steve. "But I would say we were fortunate to escape with a point."

"Now that individual effort was beautiful," continued Andy. "Do you think you might move up front later in the tournament."

"No, I do not anticipate that," said Steve, perplexed. "I am a midfielder, at least last time I checked."

"Well, very good game today, and good luck in the next match," said Andy, wrapping up the interview. "Back to you Ris..."

Back in the clubhouse, Nathaniel sat at his locker. Taking out his wallet, he looked at a 4x6 picture. It showed him and his brother, out at the park after a short game of football. Andres was never one for sports, but sometimes, Nathaniel was able to convince him to come along.

"Nat."

Nathaniel looked up. It was Stewart Goodwin, the assistant coach.

"Watts wants to see you in his office."

"Alright." Nathaniel put the picture back in his wallet and trudged down to the manager's office. This probably wasn't a good sign.

Nathaniel knocked on the door. "Come in," said a voice.

Nathaniel opened the door and walked in. Across from him, separated by a desk, sat Elias Watts.

"Sit down," said Watts. Nathaniel pulled up a chair.

"Look Nat, I don't know what you were doing out there today. You looked lost. I mean, you had a great first fifty minutes, and after that, it just collapsed."

Nathaniel nodded, not saying anything.

"Did something happen out there? An injury maybe?"

Nathaniel thought for a moment, his thoughts trailing back to the pitch...

He'd seen it in the forty-seventh minute. A pass to Groves, an errant slide tackle, and Groves was on the ground. Nothing out of the ordinary about that. But when Groves had gotten up, he'd seen, just for a second, a glint of gold. The glint of a gold cross.

As the game went on, his thoughts ran amuck. Could it be? He knew that Groves had a brother who had been in the military. He reassured himself that it was nothing, that there were many gold necklaces with crosses on them. But that had had no soothing effect.

How could he play with someone who's brother had murdered his own? Andy had been like a father to him.

"It can't be the same," thought Nathaniel. "The odds are impossible."

"No, sir," he said, finally responding to the manager's question.

"Alright. Then I expect better play in the next game, otherwise, Slaton will be in your spot. I took a big leap in selecting you for the starting eleven. Prove me right."

"Yes, sir," said Nathaniel. Then, he got up and walked back to his locker, his mind full of worries again.

by **Riojasia** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 6:47 pm

RTC (Royal Televisual Corporation) 1 - 0820 (8 O'clock Morning News)

"And now we head to Frankie Delano for the Sports this morning," finished the main anchor.

"Thanks, our top news in the Riojasian realm of sports this morning is yesterday's first match victory against Gregoryisgodisatan. The Janners defeated the Foot Slaves in an exciting 4-2 victory. Gregoryisgodistan took the initial lead with a goal at the 14th minute but only four minutes later, the Janners equalised with a goal from Ray Spingo," announced Frankie.

A video replay showed each of the goals along with a variety of different angles.

"And the Janners continued the match with Gregoryisgodistan playing some very offensive football. An offside shot resulted in a disallowed goal for Gregoryisgodistan," continued Frankie as the camera replied the offside footage, "Until our Janners struck back with a powerful offensive taking them into the lead with a goal from Dan Trooper, resulting in a 2-1 score."

The video footage changed again, showing the goal from Trooper from a number of angles, including one showing the ball just inches above the Gregoryisgodistan goalkeeper's hands.

"The second half resulted in a powerful offensive straight away with the Janners shooting before 50 minutes were on the clock, but a good save stopped the result being 3-1. The team from Gregoryisgodistan launched their own counterattack, equalising at the 60th minute," said Frankie as the video replays did their thing. "The Janners came back strongly, with their own offensive making the score 3-2 with a goal from Mutley at the 69th minute as the end result of a corner from Peters." A video replay showed the whole corner and the final goal.

"Play continued on until one of the Gregoryisgodistan players received a red card for a foul on Roger Lancaster and arguing with the referee," continued Freddy and a number of video replays showed the foul, including a number of angles notably absent from the footage in Gregoryisgodistan that showed Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Joseph Hauu clearly elbowing Lancaster out of the way as well as his argument with the referee. "Play continued as a fast offensive from the free kick awarded resulted in a second goal from Spingo, sending the Janners a result of 4-2. Another fast offensive tried to provide a result of 5-2 but the Gregoryisgodistan keeper saved it, snatching it out of the air. Play continued before providing a final score of Riojasia 4, Gregoryisgodistan 2. Here is the current league table along with yesterday's results for Group F."

Group F

New Lowerlands 0–2 New Lonopolian Empire
Bypass814 1–1 Szkvara
Gregoryisgodistan 2–4 Riojasia

Rank                              Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 New Lonopolian Empire             1   1  0  0    2   0  +2    3
  Riojasia                          1   1  0  0    4   2  +2    3
3 Bypass814                         1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
  Szkvara                           1   0  1  0    1   1   0    1
5 Gregoryisgodistan                 1   0  0  1    2   4  −2    0
  New Lowerlands                    1   0  0  1    0   2  −2    0

"And now we head to Ollie Williams for the Blackuweather report. What's it like out there today Ollie?" finished Frankie.

"It's gonna rain!" came the reply as the feed cut to the weather board.

by **Kitsuneshima** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 7:55 pm

Live Chat : Kitsunes to break their duck against Costa Luna?
Inauspicious, losing start leaves Mihashi's team needing to win to keep their hopes of progressing alive

Komiya Kyousuke, Sports Editor

KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Anon0025

ridiculous

most ludicrous

Anon6546

Mihashi's an idiot who isn't qualified in the slightest to lead a top drawer national team, that's for sure.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Sakura-chan

Yup, the people in charge of football over in the Scattered Isles should manage to do just fine with a crackpot manager, imbeciles for players, and simply bloody absurd tactics! /sarcasm
Anon1468

@Sakura-chan You know, I have a feeling we just might become excellent friends.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

@Sakura-chan While your sarcasm was ... scathing to say the least, let's just say that you have most of the office's tacit support in your stand. We all feel the same, even though I personally would like to see a great run for the Kitsunes. Unfortunately they'll have to step their game up several notches if they're going to even manage progression from the group stages.
Saint_1995

Several notches is an understatement; up the height of the Arcadia Millenium Spire would be more appropriate, I think. Last I checked it was 830 metres tall, including the spire on the top.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

@Saint_1995 ... let's not diss the Kitsunes any further. They have the ability to play well, they just aren't showing their true potential at the moment. It's up to Mihashi to rectify those mistakes and cracks in her team and mould them into a fluid unit, and we'll get the chance to see her at work during the upcoming match against the Kingdom of Costa Luna. Well, not that I'm holding out much hope, given that Mihashi is as controversial a coach as I've ever seen during all my living days. We can only pray ...
Saint_1995

Waitwaitwait ... I've just noticed a bit of a discrepancy here. If I recall correctly, didn't Akechi receive two yellow cards in the previous match but didn't get sent off? I remember that several people on here made a lot of fuss over her non-dismissal ... but it seems that you mentioned that she's gonna be absent for the next match. Has retrospective action been taken against her?
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Anon4565

That ref was a complete mess during the game, but I can't pin the blame entirely on him. He did have to contend with a pretty serious outburst of emotions which could easily have lead to further tension and perhaps even violence on the pitch; if he was preoccupied with calming down the brewing storm before it started to wreak havoc, he's done the right thing, and it's just a slight mistake on his part that Akechi didn't get sent off.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Pretty much. I've been reliably informed that him even allowing play to continue while he was off the field for treatment constituted a breach of the universal rules and regulations for football. The ref's non dismissal of Akechi is yet another serious blot in his copybook, and if I'm not sadly mistaken, he won't be officiating any further matches in this Baptism of Fire.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Okay, we've just received info from a source in the Kitsunian FA, and it appears that the team that will be playing against Costa Luna today is already set in stone! Please hold while we transfer the relevant information here ...
BlazeAura

Wonder how Mihashi'll set up her stall this time? I badly want the Kitsunes to win as well ... let's just hope that Mihashi doesn't cook up any more shitty decisions in her selection.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Trust me, I'm entirely with you on that. Enigmatic as she may be, Mihashi certainly cannot afford to cook up any more stinkers if she really wants her team to advance past the group stages. She'll just have to rein in her rebellious instincts in regards to team selection and tactical decisions if she really does have designs on the coveted title of BoF champions, and of course her team's best interests at heart.
RadiantMelody

Komiya, do you have the starting lineups for both teams handy at the moment?
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Whoa there, hold your horses for just a sec. It just so happens that we've already received word of the team Mihashi's going to field tonight, and our technicians and graphic geeks are working at full pace to convert the info into the form of a graphic ... I anticipate it being completed in a few minutes, at the absolute most.
Anon9354

Even though they've only played a single official match, I have a feeling I won't be a Kitsunes supporter for much longer if they continue acting up like they have in their debut on the international stage.
BlazingAura

@Anon9354 Not a fan of the Kitsunes myself, but I can appreciate your sentiments. No self respecting football fan could find it in their hearts to support a team that shows them up so cruelly like the Kitsunes did.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

The lineups are here!

Kitsuneshima

Costa Luna

versus
at the Northern Field (Reinheim), Deska, United Gordonopia
1600 hours MST (+9)

KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Sigh ... so Mihashi has done it again, hasn't she.
Flying kites on a saturday mornin'

Indeed she has; no doubt about that.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

For those who aren't familiar with Kitsunian football, a quick primer on the Kitsunes' players for today - Tsukade Minami, one of the Kitsunes' most talented young players, takes the place of the missing Akechi, while Sugihara Takara has been called up from the reserves at the expense of captain Moriguchi Takashi, who was hopelessly outclassed by the pacy Snackers offence last matchday. Tezuka Ruriko, as expected, comes in for Maruyama Natsu at goalkeeper, while the vastly experienced Shiina Rintaro will be given the captaincy and a spot in the heart of the midfield along with Jinnai Minatsu.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Youngster Gasai Tsumiki is also slated to earn her first start for the Kitsunes, having been drafted in from the reserves to replace Fujioka Misako, while Sakurada is shunted further upfield to play as an out-and-out striker, it would seem. The bench remains mostly the same, not many major changes; Fukazawa Taki will deputise for Tezuka, while the exciting talent Higashikuni and Fujioka Misako are to occupy spots on the bench. Rounding up the seven are - Shikitei Yoshifumi, left winger; Serizawa Sumio, striker; Enomoto Takumi, right back; and Kikugawa Mariko, right winger.
Loloz

still

KKomiya@sekaishinbun

It would appear so. Although she's been shunted further upfield, I highly doubt that Sakurada has the composure and the finishing technique to be able to fulfil her role to perfection. In addition, another puzzling selection in the defence - a right back, Enomoto Takumi, does not make the final cut for the starting XI, while a left back, Tsukade Minami, will take Akechi's place at right back.
Anon1491

That's not as controversial a selection as deciding to play Shokuhou as a keeper, I must say.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

True, but there might be some innate logic in playing Tsukade, a highly attacking wingback on the right; this could mean that Mihashi has identified the Costa Lunian left flank as a weak link in the entire team and deployed Tsukade there to take advantage of the defensive weakness there. This move has the potential to backfire badly though, as Tsukade is prone to leaving her flank wide open after rampaging forward on one of her lung-busting attacking runs.
KKomiya@sekaishinbun

Okay, I'm gonna take a short break, and my colleague will be covering for me for the time being. I'll see y'all later when the match kicks off!

by **Kitsuneshima** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 9:32 pm

Kitsunes Overrun by Fiendish Snackers!
Kitsuneshima off to a flyer - off their high perch that is - by crashing to unexpected opening defeat

Terauchi Kanami

Bone, kicking off, delivered the ball over the stationary Kitsunes, who were still haggling over the pairings for the bridge, and slipped the ball to teammate Pumper Nickle, who gleefully pounced on the chance to make it 2-1 to the Fiendish Snackers, as well as doubling his money with two simple goals.

This time, the Kitsunes didn't even bother to protest, as they just swept all their cards back into their packets and returned them to their rightful owners when the match official returned on the pitch and ordered play to continue. The Kitsunes had evidently assumed that play hadn't resumed as the referee wasn't back from the treatment room and the Snackers were just booting the ball about for fun. However, the ref didn't do himself any further favours with the Kitsunian faithful as he signalled for a goal.

A quick review of the football rules would tell you that play indeed cannot resume if the match official is not present on the pitch. However, there is an exception. For cases where the referee has appointed one of his assistants as the temporary match official, the game can proceed without further delay. The bone of contention in this case is that the referee did not verbally hand over control of the match to his assistants as he retired to the treatment room. He insisted that clear directions were issued before the game to his assistants to assume control if he was in any way incapacitated and unable to continue refereeing. However, the Kitsunian players asserted that the referee did not officially hand over control to his assistants as there was not any form of verbal communication signalling his intention to do so, and as such the goal scored during his absence was invalid.

A pitch invasion almost commenced, as several livid fans began to make their way onto the pitch, only barely being restrained by the stewards. The Kitsunes did not take this foul decision lying down either, as the entire team of players, including those on the bench, rushed onto the pitch to confront the ref. However, the ref was unmoved, and waved for play to continue. A Kitsunian player, Toyota Kaori, maintains that the ref verbally abused the Kitsunes and even threatened to abandon the game if they didn't resume play immediately, knowing full well that Kitsuneshima would forfeit the match if such an event were to transpire.

"The ref simply didn't give us any chance to make our case, and he knows full well that he is in the wrong. I cannot believe that such an incompetent official would be assigned to officiate a match in a prestigious tournament such as the Baptism of Fire."

Play resumed with a furious intensity as the Kitsunes gradually began to find their rhythm, having been spurred on by the referee's unjust decision and determined to make amends for their earlier mistake.

On the stroke of the hour, the Kitsunes pulled a goal back through their attacking maestro (pretentious indeed), Sakurada Sachiko. Toyota was released down the left flank by an excellent through ball from the defence, and she deftly manoeuvred her way past several lumbering Snackers before cutting in and releasing a venomous shot towards the top right corner of the goal with her right foot. The power of the shot was such that the Snackers goalkeeper Mann was unable to deflect the ball out despite getting his palm to the ball as it rocketed into goal.

With the score finely poised at 2-2, the game looked set to be heading for a draw. However, there was a cruel twist in the tale that had yet to make its appearance.

With the clock ticking down the seconds to full time, Snackers striker Cristo was able to rob the bumbling Fujioka deep in Kitsunian territory, and he proceeded to waltz past Shimura before again showing off his full range of skills by executing a magnificent rabona cross that got the better of Akechi. The ball curled into the middle of the box, where a defensive mix up by Jinnai and Sakanoue led to the two of them smashing into each other, and Nickle was left to apply a simple finishing touch for his hat trick and consign the Kitsunians to a richly deserved defeat in their inaugural match.

Following the match, Kitsunians manager Mihashi Chiyo refused to carry out her press duties, and her assistant Kinoshita Chiho was delegated to face the full glare of the media. When questioned as to the legitimacy of the second Snackers goal, Kinoshita responded vehemently, leaving no one in any doubt about the Kitsunians' stance on the matter.

Kinoshita Chiho, Kitsuneshima assistant manager, on the legitimacy of Fiendish Snackers' second goal

I think it's an absolute disgrace that the ref's allowed such a goal to stand; it is clearly written down in the rulebook that play cannot proceed until the referee's made his way back or handed over control of the match to his assistants. There was clearly no such verbal transfer of control, and as such I'm standing by my opinion that the goal was wrongly allowed. Come on, the whistle wasn't even sounded; how can the match resume? As such, we will be making an official appeal to the authorities, and I believe that they will be able to right the wrongs that have been committed in today's match. We fully deserved three points, at least one; we were robbed of them by the referee's outlandish decisions that do not conform to the official rulebook.

The Kitsunians are obviously and understandably outraged at what they perceive to be a perversion of justice in the beautiful game; however, they cannot overlook the fact that it was their own defensive mistakes and slip ups that contributed to the other two goals for the Snackers. Indeed, if they had managed to stay firm in defence, they would now be celebrating a 2-1 victory over their opponents. As it is, they will be forced to entirely rethink and revamp their approach to defending and also their overall team strategy if they are to progress beyond the group stages of the Baptism of Fire.

They will have to reevaluate their priorities and get the team's chemistry sorted out before the next matchday rolls around, or they will find themselves in grave danger of a second successive defeat to unheralded opponents, this time the Kingdom of Costa Luna. Indeed, Mihashi will have to appreciate the fact that the Baptism of Fire is not her local Sunday League; she cannot hope to make absurd tactical decisions like she did today if the Kitsunes are to have any chance of winning their matches. Thus, Mihashi has to solve a conundrum - does she continue to indulge in her idealistic fantasies of playing whoever she likes in whatever position she fancies, or to conform to the harsh reality and carry out her duties as manager with a healthy dose of common sense.

If the Kitsunians continue playing in this vein, I think it is safe to say that they will be knocked out of the tournament sooner rather than later.

Pages12

by **Marcos Dynamite** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 10:06 pm

Welcome to Dino-Me-Tay Daily! I'm your host Carla Dram. The Firecrackers earned a thrilling 1-0 victory over Pects, setting up a showdown against 2-0 Crystal Ponies later this week.

But first off, the Picts match. For just over two-thirds of the match, Picts dominated time of possession, trading possession and ball control for offensive pressure. At one point, Picts had a stunning 83% possession rate. But as the match wore on, the Pictian passes became sloppier, and the balls stayed more in the middle of the field.

In the 64th minute, Inez took advantage of one sloppy pass, starting a 3-on-1 break, which ended with a high shot from Kelly K. But the dam had broke and for the next 26 minutes, the Firecrackers had 74% possession, as Picts scrambled defensively. In the 78th minute, Kelly K slapped home the lone goal, after a skidding cross pass from Denise.

As stated earlier, Crystal Ponies are next, and they are 2-0, after an impressive 2-0 win over San Jose Guayabal. It should be a tight match, as both teams use the 4-4-2, and CP s a team of actual ponies.
_________________________________________
BACK IN MARCOS DYNAMITE-

Operative 751, status update of Phase 2?

56% complete sir. Multiple vectors have been plotted and we are just awaiting the transmission injectors.

Good, estimated completion time?

22 hours and 46 minutes, sir. Though if we cut one vector, it will be completed within 18 hours.

No. Mission will continue as planned.

by **Aslotten-Behtherborg sa Cesky** » Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:26 pm

Självbiografi av Edvin Astøberg, Del 2

The warm feeling I had with my parents wasn't like that with the rest of the family, though. My father's parents, Gunnar and Hana, are both very cold, distant people who don't especially like to be around anyone or anything annoying. They avoid drama successfully, but they also end up avoiding things like fresh air, people, and the news. My father is their only child. We saw them on holidays, but that was about all the effort we made to get up to their home in Veksunda. The only connection I still have to them is my middle name, Gunnar, which is my grandfather's name as per tradition.

My mother's side of the family is almost a polar opposite to that. She grew up with 4 siblings and a very politically active household. Her father, Mikkel, was mayor of Calmö for three terms, but never won an election into a national seat. Her parents are very colorful people in general, both artistically talented and highly motivated to succeed. Her mother, my Nana Ursula, worked as a freelance artist for her entire life, and was good enough to make a living off of it. However, despite all their wonderful character traits, my mother's parents weren't especially good child rearers. They were typically far too focused on their work to spend time with their children, and as such my mother and all of her siblings grew into very independent people with vibrant individual personalities. My mother doesn't really maintain much contact with her parents anymore, besides the occasional discussion about William and me or getting together on the holidays.

Those holiday dinners were the bane of my existence growing up. Consisting of my normal family, both sets of grandparents, and all of my mother's siblings and their families, it turned into an affair nearly reaching 30 people. Mikkel and Ursula were always too vibrant and engaging for anyone else's good, especially Gunnar and Hana, who positively despised them and their energy. Yet year after year, the family got together for more terse statements from Gunnar and pursed lips from Hana in response to lengthy, detailed questions from an inevitably injured Ursula. My family was just stuck there in the crossfire, my father too kind to intervene and my mother too apathetic to care if her parents' feelings were hurt. I particularly remember an instance from when I was 10 or 11:

Mikkel: "Ursula, why don't you tell them about our vacation?"
Ursula: "Oh, yes, that's a great idea! Well, we went out to North Moravia, starting with Dagstad. It's right at the mountains and just absolutely lovely. We went to an outdoor art festival there with a lot of lovely pieces. There is a great future for this country in contemporary art, wouldn't you say?"
Mikkel: "Mmhmm, absolutely."
Ursula: "Anyways, after the festival and about 3 nights in Dagstad, we headed south to Olomouč. It's a fairly boring city, but we saw some friends of ours who just moved there from Ostrava and they were just wonderful. We went out to see that new movie Hexagonal Toads of the Turquoise Dimension, I think it was called, a lovely art house film by Sven Karlßon Jr. Have you folks seen it?"
Gunnar: *glares*
Ursula: "I guess not then, well anyways Olomouč was done after 3 more days, and then we went east to Vartöby where my cousins are, so we saw them there. Say, Hana, how's your sister doing? She lives out there, right?"
Hana: *nod*
Ursula: "Ok then. Well it was just absolutely lovely, lots of greenery and trees and some wonderful parks. They've really done a good job with that city after the violence of '97, oh how horrible that was. Do you remember that, dear?"
Mikkel: "Oh, absolutely. Horrible things."
Ursula: "Yes, not lovely at all. Anyways, that was the end of the trip. Di you folks go anywhere recently?"
Gunnar: *glares*
Ursula: "Nowhere at all? Not even a play or the park?"
Gunnar: "No travel."
Ursula: "Oh well that's a shame. Don't you folks get bored?"
Gunnar: "Better to be thought a bore and stay silent than talk about your life and confirm it."
Ursula: "Well that's not called for, we're just trying to share our travels."
Gunnar: *glares*

So those were not a whole lot of fun, as you can tell. But no matter, as those days are over now. Gunnar died last year from a heart attack, and Hana passed away five or so years ago due to old age. I don't really miss either of them.

ˇˇˇˇˇˇˇˇˇˇˇˇ

My football career, as I said earlier, started with a private team at age 6. At that point, according to my father, I was already an entire level above the other children my age. I attribute it to my time around the pros with a little bit of good genes, seeing as my father played briefly in the Svenska Division before retiring due to a chronic back injury. Regardless of how I got there, it was pretty clear that I had to move on after that. I was placed on the Calmö AIF pre-development team the day I turned 8, and even before the time a year was up, I was already practically a member of the South Bohemia regional team for 9-10 year olds. I joined the Calmö Level 1 team right away as well, and my first year round exposure to competitive football begin at age 9. I remember it being a whirlwind at first, traveling to all the tournaments and spending all those nights practicing with my father. It wasn't an easy adjustment from the competition I had faced earlier, either. With the regional team I was already beginning to see the country's best players, and some of them frightened me with their raw skill. I knew from an early age that I wasn't the type who could coast on natural instinct alone; I knew I had to work for it.

Åsløtten-Bëðerbørg så Česky 4–1 Carialus
by Bez Tváře Novinář (OOC: Please put into Google Translate for purposes to be revealed once you get there)

Astøberg 14' (0-1 ABC). Assister: Anderßon.
Astøberg 26' (0-2 ABC). Assister: Rasmußen.
Dvakošek 37' (0-3 ABC). Assister: Anderßon.
Fuller 50' (1-3 ABC). Assister: Baca.
Beneš 62' (1-4 ABC). Assister: Äsmundsen.

Please apologies to be had for mistake in English, I do not have skillful with this speaking manner. Today I write article describing victory of national team in Baptism of Tournament Fire. Score to be had occurring 4-1 for national team. Swedish player Astøberg scoring twice at 14 and 26 minutes, Czech amazing superstar Zlatan Dvakošek scoring 37 minutes. Game flow to be had was fast for national team, counterattacking strategies seen frequently from Coach Olsen. Midfielders work hard in box and to pass to forwards for shots. There were to be had 9 shots on goal in first half by self. Calarius opened second half with great charge; much energy was deployed. Forward man Fuller scored at 50 minutes, assisted by midfield player. But charge back to be had by national team. Corner kick at 62 minutes make result of goal by Isak Beneš, great Czech player with good defense and head, which was to be had for goalscoring purpose. This is where scoring ended, 4-1 national team win over Calarius. Team now with two victories, high position in group. Until next writing, Bez.

by **Monozygotia** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 12:10 am


Scrutinisation Office
Encrypted Report (Decrypted)

From: 	Agents Ghanix & Tsasix
	Gordonopia City

To:	Supervisors Chim & Chal
	SO-16, Umturtannysser

Signature:

	-1.3946164680e+0	 1.4514852950e+0  
	 1.4517997860e+0	 4.6857787210e-3  
	 1.2090807130e+0	 2.0830315920e-1  
	 1.2610305220e+0  	-3.4213813060e-1  
	 1.3955658510e+0   	 1.6820807850e+0  
	 2.6560770020e+0  	-6.7504032660e-1 
	-7.1327096820e-1   	 7.1959862060e-1  
	 8.7640168170e-1   	 6.0165433640e-1

Operation Strange Priority (Baptism of Fire Foreign Tour)
Update 0.7749413379-01

READS:

Greetings Honourable Supervisors.

Update One will be short, forgive us, we have much to do to establish a buffer zone and secure quarantine for our glorious Monozygotes, as per orders.

The football team has arrived safely in Gordonopia City and we have established a private zone on the eighth floor of the Grüßehotel. (We had been reserved the ninth floor despite our instructions on booking. Tsasix suggests this was a problem with the internet and LateRooms.mz.com which is notoriously frail, especially when booking abroad. Ghanix is suspicious the hotel may have ulterior motives and could be compromised by Odd propagandists. We initiated protocol -1.5880146160e+5 from the security manual and complained bitterly until we were relocated to floor 8. We remain on high alert for infiltration from hotel management).

Inevitably the facility is full of Odd people as is common in foreign countries, we have managed to clear the floor and posted teams of SO-4 Heavy Operatives at each stairwell and lift. No one gets in or out without permission. The SO-4 team, led by Commanders Kachal & Kacham, report no difficulties in arriving in the city under cover as Monozygotic football supporters. They have secured the nearby safehouse, a pension called Glücklichehaus where off-duty SO-4s will reside.

The three goalkeepers Tzim, Etzil & Namilin have been accommodated at the Glücklichehaus under the supervision of the Office for Cross-Referencing the Odds. We have not established communication lines with the OXO Officers, Tzaj & Tzak, who travelled under separate arrangements with the three Odds and several other OXO guardians to ensure separation from the main squad. Whilst we see this as necessary for the morale of the team not to have mix with the dirty singletons, according to the wishes of the team managers and coaches, nevertheless we reiterate our concerns this increases the security exposure.

That said, Commanders Kachal & Kacham inform us that Glücklichehaus is fully secured and the twin owners enthusiastic students of twinculture.

Operational briefing of the first match will come under separate cover shortly, suffice to say here a successful operation in which the team got in and out with minimal fuss, and of course defeated the opposition. Although, from an entirely off-duty supporter point of view, a 2-1 win over some Partially Blind Odds seems a poor return. But then, we are humble SO-16 Agents, not football coaches. What do we know of the subtleties of this peculiar game?

Humble Attestations to Our Supervisors
All Hail The Double Government
Uphold The Glory & Purity of Twinculture for Evermore!

Ghanix & Tsasix
Agents SO-16

by **United Gordonopia** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 12:22 am

Remember, the following are merely observations, and not requirements:

-I noticed some great work setting up drama and contention within squads, which will hopefully play out over the tournament. If you end up getting knocked out earlier than hoped, remember that there is always World Cup Qualifying to continue a story arc.

-I liked a lot of the 'fan commentary' shown in several ways through some of the RPs, both positive and negative. One thing I did observe, though, was that many of the fans seemed to have fairly homogenous reactions to their respective teams. Perhaps add some flair by mixing in some dissenting voices.

Group E

Monozygotia 1–0 Patistan
Hardwinter 0–1 Kidlantis
Partially Blind People 2–2 Vaugania

Rank                              Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Monozygotia                       2   2  0  0    3   1  +2    6
2 Vaugania                          2   1  1  0    8   4  +4    4
3 Patistan                          2   1  0  1    2   1  +1    3
4 Kidlantis                         2   1  0  1    1   2  −1    3
5 Partially Blind People            2   0  1  1    3   4  −1    1
6 Hardwinter                        2   0  0  2    2   7  −5    0

Group F

New Lonopolian Empire 1–0 Riojasia
Szkvara 0–0 Gregoryisgodistan
New Lowerlands 1–3 Bypass814

Rank                              Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 New Lonopolian Empire             2   2  0  0    3   0  +3    6
2 Bypass814                         2   1  1  0    4   2  +2    4
3 Riojasia                          2   1  0  1    4   3  +1    3
4 Szkvara                           2   0  2  0    1   1   0    2
5 Gregoryisgodistan                 2   0  1  1    2   4  −2    1
6 New Lowerlands                    2   0  0  2    1   5  −4    0

Group G

Colombian Britannia 2–4 The Paradystopi Lymryk Isles
Fiendish Snackers 3–3 Southwick
Kingdom of Costa Luna 3–3 Kitsuneshima

Rank                              Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 The Paradystopi Lymryk Isles      2   1  1  0    6   4  +2    4
2 Fiendish Snackers                 2   1  1  0    6   5  +1    4
3 Colombian Britannia               2   1  0  1    8   5  +3    3
4 Southwick                         2   0  2  0    5   5   0    2
5 Kitsuneshima                      2   0  1  1    5   6  −1    1
6 Kingdom of Costa Luna             2   0  1  1    4   9  −5    1/pre]


Group H

Taijan 1–0 Theaoie
Safaari 0–1 Polkopia
Felinetopia 1–0 Tarrigan

[pre]Rank                              Pld   W  D  L   GF  GA  GD  Pts
1 Polkopia                          2   2  0  0    5   0  +5    6
2 Felinetopia                       2   2  0  0    4   0  +4    6
3 Tarrigan                          2   1  0  1    2   2   0    3
4 Taijan                            2   1  0  1    1   3  −2    3
5 Safaari                           2   0  0  2    1   3  −2    0
6 Theaoie                           2   0  0  2    0   5  −5    0

by **Patistan** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 3:07 am

no WHY why did i just leave that goal these thought were going throught shaheers mind through the subway ride why.if only one more minute it would ne a draw why its all right saud nasser the coach.its okay we will get them another time i dont think they will be another time says shaheer i think we are not going to pass the group stage now.We are said fraz the striker we are

by **Kitsuneshima** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 3:55 am

Act Two - Breaking Storm

"Well, that wasn't what we were hoping for, was it?"

I squeak in surprise and fear, letting out a few whimpers as Coach Mihashi swoops down upon us like an eagle right as we troop into our dressing room.

" ... no, Coach." I whip my head around to see who had the guts to speak, only to realise that it was the most experienced member of the squad, our captain for the day, Shiina Rintaro.

"You lot suck so hard that I can't even come up with harsh enough words for you from my mind. That was absolutely rubbish, and I'll have you know that I won't tolerate any sort of this nonsense from you lot in the upcoming three group matches. If we fail to secure maximum points, we'll have to hope that results elsewhere go our way, and that's not where we want to be. Period."

"If you're gonna play that way throughout this Baptism, we might as well get packed and book a flight back to Kizuna right now. You looked tepid, boring, fucking pathetic; can't even play a bloody match of football well to save your lives, can you?"

I glance around the room and observe the expressions on my teammates' faces out of curiosity and some sort of sadistic desire to see how they were responding to the mental duress that they were being subjected to through Coach's no-holds-barred verbal assault.

Shiina-san looked pretty calm; he just kept his eyes on Coach throughout her rant and occasionally nodded, apparently accepting all her criticism and trying to figure out the best way to adjust for the next matches. He's got one thing running for him - he once played at the same club as Coach for a couple of seasons during his nomadic career. I guess they've figured each other out and of course, the best way to deal with each other under all circumstances. I'll tell you one thing; he's a true professional that takes his job as a footballer pretty damn seriously.

A few of the other younger members of the squad seemed to me to be somewhat disgruntled at Coach's harsh words - I could see a few frowns on their faces and some whispered rumbles of discontent - that is only to be expected, since they don't have the experience of dealing with Coach Mihashi, unlike Shiina-san; nor the mental fortitude and professionalism to really take Coach's words to heart and find some way of bettering themselves for the next match.

"I'm telling you this straight - whoever finds themselves on my wrong side when it comes to performance will be packing their bags and flying straight home, regardless of whether we're still in the tournament or not. And if you do find yourself on an economy-class flight back to Kizuna without the rest of your teammates, you can be sure that you won't add to your caps for the rest of your career. Not while I'm still the manager of Kitsuneshima."

Coach Mihashi pauses for a while, distractedly running a hand through her jet-black hair, clearly exerting great effort to rein in her emotions. I can see that it's paining her very much to rebuke us like this, since she was herself forced to retire from Mizuyuki's national team because of a well-publicised spat and subsequent fall out with the manager at that time.

Even though Coach Mihashi hasn't confided in us about that event, nor has she mentioned it even once during all the time she's been with us, I know rather a lot about her and her background as a professional player because I took the time to do some research on my future manager when I was called up to the national squad a few months previously. Simply surfing the internet and browsing through the local library's archives gave me a veritable treasure trove of info about Mihashi Chiyo.

I discovered that she had been a prolific striker by anyone's standards, the golden girl of the Mizuyukian national team. That was only five years ago. Then twenty two years of age and at the peak of her powers, she was tipped by many to continue spearheading Mizuyuki's attack for years to come. Her crowning moment of glory came when she scored several crucial goals for the national team throughout the course of a major regional tournament, singlehandedly getting them past several difficult opponents and firing the team to the title, which cemented the nation's place as a major footballing power in the region. She was the darling of the public, the flavour of the month; in short, she could do no wrong in the adoring public's eyes.

However, Coach Mihashi was rather ... flashy as a player, if you know what I mean. She had a tendency to showboat and over complicate simple moves, but her fancy skills tended to get the ball past her opponents and into the net, unlike many other footballing ballerinas.

The manager apparently didn't much fancy players in Coach's mould.

When the manager decided that a change of strategy and tactics was in order, he took the liberty of dropping Coach to the bench in favour of another, far less talented player that he thought was better suited to his new strategy during yet another regional tournament. Without a single word of explanation, nor a promise to give Coach a chance to adapt to his strategy.

Understandably furious at her uncalled for and unreasonable omission from the tournament squad, Coach marched straight to the manager's office along with a few of her old friends in the team, who similarly felt that she had been mishandled and mistreated by the bungling manager.

I couldn't find any reports of what transpired behind the closed doors of the manager's office, but it was clear as crystal that Coach had been wronged by that bloody fool of a manager.

The real blow to her career with the national team came two days after Coach's confrontation with the manager.

The Mizuyuki FA released a press statement. In it, the manager claimed that he was never going to pick Coach for the team, along with the friends that had stood by her during her interview with the manager. I quote verbatim : "I wouldn't select her for the national team even if I had to play a bellicose, rabid German Shepherd as the striker. The same goes for Otsuka, Shirai, Genda and Kawatake."

And you know what was the reason that he had the nerve to give?

"Mihashi didn't want to conform to my tactics; she thought that she was better than the rest of the team, a severely mistaken notion that was only further reinforced by the praise heaped upon her by the press and the public, not to mention her own teammates in the national team. She then tried to undermine my authority as manager and instigate a rebellion within the squad by secretly fabricating lies about me and spreading these untruths among the squad members. Thus, I felt it my responsibility to step in and clear matters up - once I did that, the rest of the team told me that they simply couldn't play with Mihashi anymore."

Of course, this completely false press statement sounded the death knell of Coach Mihashi's career with the national team.

The media absolutely crucified her without even going after the manager; one can only think that the FA had some despicable machinations in place that prevented or restricted the media from digging into the incident and revealing the whole truth.

In the end, Coach was left with her credibility as a pro footballer in tatters; her contract with her domestic club was terminated, and no other club was willing to take on a player who was perceived to think herself as bigger than the team. That was also the end for her club career - she finally decided to hang up her boots after getting emotionally exhausted by the accusing media and having to explain the truth to every single doubter or critic of hers, who would nevertheless continue to diss her despite her trying her best to correct their impression towards her.

Coach surveyed us with a critical eye before sighing and continuing to address us.

"Now. Get yourself changed and get your arses back to the training complex pronto. I'll go through the video footage of the entire game with you, and I'll bloody well make sure that no further farces like that happen during my tenure. Get moving, this instant."

by **Polkopia** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 4:46 am

Polkopian National News brought to you by Mr. Boris Valafeev

Original Translation

Polkopia Remains At Top After 1-0 Win

The Polkopian Team ended their second game in a 1-0 win over Safaari, leaving Polkopia at the top of their group after match day 2. The team is expected to play Felinetopia tomorrow, and expectations are high for the Polkopian team, who has yet to lose , or have a single goal scored against them.

The first and only goal was scored by Artur Yeminov, who came on for Rostislav Kantrisov to start the second half. A free kick was awarded to Polkopia after a harsh tackle by a player from Safaari left a golden opportunity for a goal just outside the penalty box, where a perfectly struck ball by Yeminov guided the ball into the upper 90. Several attempts were made by the Polkopians shortly after, but nothing managed to leave the ball in the back of the net, despite valiant efforts from midfielder Aleksandr Krenkov. On the other side of the pitch, defenders Sergei Ulansov and Lance Smith managed to stop several attacks made by Safaari, most of which showed high potential of scoring for Safaari. The two are expected to start against Felinetopia.

Coach Stenin highlighted efforts made by Krenkov in his effort to guide Polkopia into the lead with his tactical plays, which he set up perfectly. Unfortunately for the team, the plays could not be executed the way they were planned, thus, cutting off the Polkopian attack. Defender Alexander T'voni is expected to start, leaving Andrei Yakostovo on the bench, and midfielder Semyon Benisov is to start in Boris Polgov's place.

Leave A Comment Below

Morosa342: Way to go, Polkopia!!!! Vivia che Polkopiya! <333

Yasoo39: Don't know why Stenin doesn't start Bilan for Kantrisov. Bilan is 100x better! Moron!!!!

SlotMaster (In reply to Yasoo39): You're forgetting the fact that Bilan is 34 and Kantrisov is 21. Why waste all that young talent? Who's the moron now?

YamEater: good efforts by polkpoia! #respect!

VW_Driver: FINALLY! I love seeing Benisov play! It's a shame he was injured two months ago. That's the only reason why he isn't starting now. He deserves to start! He is amazing!

PS_4U: Is it me, or is Polkopia starting to slow down? Maybe they're just not cut out for large scale tournaments, idk, but they're not as strong as they usually are. The first two games were lucky. They're gonna have to work for a win now.

Shaaram31: FUQ POOPOLKIA! LAND OF RACISTS!

Mr_Smiley (In reply to Shaaram31): Yeah, like 20 years ago. Get with the times, you low-life troll!

by **The Paradystopi Lymryk Isles** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 6:03 am

Flappy sat uncomfortably upon a chair. He had come to the conclusion that there were two types of humans that designed chairs. Those that accommodated peoples with tails and those that did not. The person who had furnished the hotel room room in which he now sat was one of the latter and he squirmed in an effort to discover the most comfortable method of balancing himself. He was attempting to write a journal of some sort but the initial excitement had now given way to frustration. Lymryker Paradystopian was his least favourite topic at school after discovering mellifluous prose didn't write itself.

What rhymes with Southwick? Quick? Slick? Dick ... Dammit ... No respectable journal should have the word 'dick' in the second sentence.

Nevermind, let's skip forward and come back to that.

Colombian Brittania ... Oh, for fuck's sake ... Penumbrian tannier? That's makes no sense ... you can't just make up words ... or can you? Hmmm ...

He punched his tail as he felt his weight slipping off towards the left. All this damn chair needed was a hole in the back.

Damn this feggle of Human construvention
My vure flipper, wrought namblier than one can mention
An escapol required
No longer I'll be exstryed
And compose prose of such discomboblosention

Flappy re-read his short poem with a smile on his squat, furry face, then grimaced. He thought of his old teacher, Skimmer Whiskerface and what the archaic Pteronurian would think of this aberration. Skimmer spoke better Paradystopi than many of the country's natives and adored the language with a merciless zeal. That waddling thesaurus would despair at such a 'discomboblosention' of what he loved so much. Flappy once even received a clip around the ear and a short lecture after class on the 'beautiful eccentricity of the silent 'k'' for misspelling 'knife'

As I took to the field against Southwick.
Through my veins my blood did race so quick.
My first international melay (sic)
Ninety minutes to play
...
This stilted poem makes me sound like a prick.

He tore the paper with a furious scribbling of what he had just written. He was due at the brief ahead of the match against Fiendish Snackers in thirty minutes. It was a big one. A win could put the Lymrykers at the top of the group with a point margin with only two games left to play.

He doodled a fish, trying to compose himself for one final poetic push but nothing came.

If only he had scored that goal, that would have inspired him. Five minutes left against Colombian Brittania, they were already winning four-two and their opponents looked deflated. Stinkypaws had just exposed a hole in their defense. Flappy had run onto the lofted through-ball weighted beautifully from Hooktooth's tail. What had possessed him to try a 'frying pan'? The 'frying pan', the Pteronurian equivalent of a human's overhead kick. The otter leaps, performs a forward roll and smashes the ball with their tail in a way akin to a smash in any racquet sport. Flappy was outside the area, such a move was idiocy. The ball was caught early and arched neatly into the waiting keeper's hands. Hooktooth's look of disappointment was expected. Flappy knew he should have controlled the ball and passed in on but in that moment, youthful exuberance prevailed.

I was a fool.

There was little point composing a poem around that line, it would only trivialise the sentiment.

Flappy jumped down from the chair and stretched his tail. Good grief, that felt good! Anyway, on to business. He made towards the door but stopped and returned to his journal, drew one short line and two words upon the page and scampered out.

I was a fool.
Past tense.

'Learn from your mistakes and move forward.' Maybe Skimmer Whiskerface wasn't such an old fool after all.

by **Gregoryisgodistan** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 6:59 am

Coach Slave CAUD87147 was very disappointed in his team following a 0-0 draw against Szkvara. Although it is Gregoryisgodistan's first competitive point, the Foot Slaves controlled a better part of the action, getting 23 shots including 13 on goal, but could not score. Meanwhile, the stellar back line limited Szkvara to 4 shots, and only 1 on goal. It was a great game played by the defense.

Gregoryisgodistan's first chance came in the 3rd minute, when Death Row Inmate On Parole Until His Team Loses Inmate Number 91488 took a free kick just outside the penalty area. He sent the shot over the crossbar, however, and it was still 0-0.

In the 7th minute, Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Robert Possibe had only the keeper to beat, but it bounced off his fingterips and away. Soccer Jester FunnyMan294 followed it up with a shot that hit the post, before Death Row Inmate On Parole Until His Team Loses Inmate Number 91488 hit a shot that the goalkeeper, who was still on the ground, managed to reach up and grab. If the shot had been almost anywhere else on goal, it would have been 1-0. Most unfortunate.

Gregoryisgodistan had many more opportunities, but the biggest one came in the 53rd minute when they were awarded a penalty kick. As Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Robert Possibe ran up to take it, the keeper slipped on the wet grass. So pretty much all Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Robert Possibe had to do was put it on goal and it would be 1-0. His eyes went wide as he saw the keeper fall, but he sent it over the crossbar. Still 0-0.

In the 87th minute, substitute Prune Farmer R56OMJ took a corner, and kicked it into the box, where Loyal Friend of Lord Almighty Gregory Henry Itted headed it just wide of the right post, with the goalkeeper hopelessly confused, having attempted to catch the corner kick. The right side was was wide open.

That was the last chance the Foot Slaves had.

Gregoryisgodistan has managed just 1 point in its first two matches. Their next game is against New Lowerlands, tomorrow. New Lowerlands, like Szkvara, is too incompetent to even publish a roster, so it should be an easy win for the Foot Slaves. Then again, Szkvara wasn't a pushover, so anything can happen. That's why they play the game.

Head of the Gregoryisgodistan Soccer Federation, Sports Minister Jack Allen, said that Coach Slave CAUD87147's job could be in danger if the Foot Slaves do not manage at least one win, and preferably more, in this tournament. "We have significantly underperformed expectations so far. There is still time to turn things around - we have three more games. If he wins one, his job is probably safe, if he wins two it's definitely safe, if he wins all three, he's just earned himself a contract extension."

Additionally, Gregoryisgodistanis are taking note of the fact that no matter how bad they are doing, Costa Luna is worse. The Foot Slaves are 5th in their group, but Costa Luna is last. The Gregoryisgodistan media generally portrays Costa Lunians as utter idiots in propaganda disguised as news. Additionally, the hit TV show "Costa Lunians Say the Darndest Things" portrays Costa Lunians as even stupider than their "real" counterparts. It stars Actor 81248D8J as Doybert, an incredibly stupid Costa Lunian who does things like fish for people in swimming pools, thinking they are fish in a lake, and try to visit a llama colony that he thinks lives in trees under the sea.

by **Taijan** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:14 am

Introduction
Taijan is a land steeped in history and doused in culture, a veritable potpourri of indigenous and imported traditions, foods, and celebrations. The island's original inhabitants were a mysterious, egalitarian society who lived in small villages along the coasts and hunted the abundant game of the interior, living close to the heart of the green island. Little is known about pre-contact Taijani culture, but archeological evidence suggests that they lived a semi-nomadic lifestyle, moving with the game, the fish, and the monsoons much like today's backpackers.

The first foreigners to settle on Taijan were pirates and escaped slaves, each seeking asylum from those who pursued them. These groups freely intermingled with the native Taijanis, beginning the multiracialism that today defines Taijani identity. The name "Taijan", meaning "green" in the native language, was first used in this period to describe the island, when the reformed pirate Jermaine Laurent was hanged by Dutch authorities for refusing to give up the location. He reportedly gave a lengthy final speech, but only the last word, "taijan" was transcribed. When his last words reached the island, they took up the word as their name.

Geographically, Taijan can be approximately divided into three regions; the South Coast, the Interior, and the North Coast. The South Coast is the commercial hub of Taijan and includes the Coco Bay metro as well as St. Ignatius and New Zion. South Coasters tend to be more laid-back than their neighbors to the north, and this area is the most traveler-friendly of all Taijan. The Interior is defined as any area not in proximity to the coast, and so encompasses a wide variety of terrain, from fertile valleys to mountains to dense forests. The interior is overwhelmingly rural, with Montem Virid as its only major conurbation, but the natural beauty is unmatched. Finally, the North Coast is Taijan's industrial hub, including the cities of St. Christopher, Nova Algiers, and Nova Tunis.

by **Furellum** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 7:55 am

A draw. Nothing to be ashamed of, although Furellum would need to do better than that in the next few games if they wanted to advance. The game had been a wash-out really. Both teams had been locked in a midfield battle with few chances for goals. The game dragged on, and despite the building frustrations on both sides the impasse remained. Fyodor could not help be reminded of another impasse, long ago.

Constable Iosef pulled his dark cloak up around his ears, trying to keep off the chill from the wind that swirled around the rooftops. It had been almost a week since he'd been shot, and since then Captain Kohut had doubled the number of patrols around the city. What's more, he'd placed watchmen on the rooftops, concealed under dark cloaks and hiding in the shadows. Kohut was convinced something was going to go down, and he wasn't taken any chances. So far though, the watch had heard nothing and seen nothing, and no progress had been made on finding the assassin who fired on both Fyodor and Wally Vasile. Whoever he was, and whoever he worked for, they were keeping a low profile.

Fyodor wondered how long the Captain would keep this up. He'd known Kohut long enough to know his doggedness in pursuing things, but the double patrols and rooftop stake-outs was taking its toll on morale. Not to mention the budget. The Duke would not be happy, thought Fyodor, but then he had the luxury of living in another country. He was not under threat, unlike the Grand Bishop. He'd doubled the guard around his palace, and enlisted the watch in ensuring his safety. So now Fyodor was sitting on a roof overlooking the palace, crammed between two chimney stacks, on the off-chance that an assassin would take a shot at the Grand Bishop. Fyodor silently prayed he wouldn't. He had no wish to meet the assassin again on such familiar grounds. The watchman was only alive because the bolt had missed his exposed face. Next time he might not be so lucky.

That night seemed to drag on forever. The Grand Bishop slept safely, the watchmen below patrolled and Fyodor sat and watched, for hour after hour, until the dawn sun came rising up over the Grossmarc. With it, Fyodor arose, and made his way back to the Mournlight Watch House. As soon as he entered, he was aware something was wrong. The place was almost empty, whereas it should have been a hive of activity at this time of day, with watchmen coming and going as the patrols changed. An inquiry of the constable manning the desk confirmed his fears. "Murder sir. Over at the Guldisall. The Captain wants all incoming officers over there."
Fyodor sighed and rubbed a hoof over his blurry eyes. It had been a long night, and it looked like his morning was about to get longer.

The Guldisall was Other Altsby's university of magical studies. The ancient school had been churning out the nation's wizards for centuries. It was said to be guarded by strong magic. Breaking into such a place was feat on its own, and Fyodor was amazed it had been accomplished. But there was no doubt that it had, as he beheld the scene of carnage before him. Glass lay shattered across the floor of the Great Library, and books had been pulled from there shelves and flung across the room. But the worst was the blood, splattered across the walls and shelves. Under a sheet in the corner of the room, where the watch had laid them, were six bodies. Each had been brutally butchered with what the forensic team was certain was an axe. One was the head librarian, another the night porter. The rest were students, the youngest just sixteen. Fyodor felt his emotions rise. He'd been to murder scenes before, but this one was affecting him badly. He needed to be objective here, but it was difficult when their were four children lying under the sheet, their bodies hacked to pieces.

He was not the only one horrified though. The faces of his fellow watchmen were grim, and the Guldisall's Dean had tears rolling freely down his face as he talked with Captain Kohut. The captain saw Fyodor approach and acknowledged him with a brief nod. "Excuse me Dean." the Captain said, then turned to Fyodor. "Constable. A terrible business. I need you to find out how they got in. The Dean tells me that the place has barrier wards around the perimeter. They were still up when the bodies were discovered, so whoever did this either found another way in, or was powerful enough to get through the wards without being detected."
"You think it might have been a wizard?"
"If what the Dean was telling me is true, he would have had to be one hell of a wizard to get through these wards. Which begs the question of why he'd then use an axe to kill his victims. I think we can rule that angle out for the time being. Which leaves us with something of a mystery as to how the killer got in."
"Why these victims? What's the connection between them?"
"From what we can gather, it was a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. All of them were in the library when the killer got in, and well, you can guess the rest."
"In too much detail. I'll find how he got in, and I promise we'll nail the bastard. I swear."

Fyodor blinked back tears. The memory still haunted him to this day. He'd been thinking of that time a lot lately. Even on the pitch, it had never been far from his mind. Why now? he wondered. Why this moment? He'd succeeded in locking it away, forgetting about it...or so he'd thought.

by **Welsh Cowboy** » Sun Sep 01, 2013 2:47 pm

OOC: This takes place before the Alkoul match

The Journey I've Been On
The Story of Alec Vordeau: Part II

Alec Vordeau had never been amazed by something like today. Here in Arexa, Astograth, he was visiting the site of what archaeologists thought were ancient temples; he wasn't sure how old they were, but the structures, obviously eroded through the epochs, were incredible. He even saw what looked to be writings on what looked to be a pillar. The only thing he wasn't enjoying was the underground atmosphere, but some lights had been set up, and so he didn't feel too claustrophobic.

He felt a tap on his shoulder, and he turned to see a short man, with a well-manicured mustache, who was staring at him and smiling.

'Kaixo," the man said.

"Kaixo," Alec replied, knowing this was the word for hello in Astograthian.

Then the man began speaking a torrent of words that Alec hopelessly tried to understand, and predictably failed. He had hardly read the phrase book the manager had given him, so he knew very little Astograthian. After a few seconds, the man stopped talking.

"Zure herrialdeko barregarria da," said Alec, desperately trying to communicate with the Astograthian man, who wore a kind expression on his face; he'd picked this phrase out of the three or four he knew.

The man's expression changed, though, as soon as he heard those words. His eyes grew dark, and his mouth began to move quickly, leaving Alec unsure of exactly what he was saying, although he was sure he wasn't trying to discuss the weather with him.

He madly flipped through the Astograthian phrasebook he carried with him. He found a page and stuck his finger down and said the word he saw.

'Iturributa?' he said hesitantly.

The man let out a yell and began to move forward toward Alec. His fists were readied for a fight it appeared. And Alec had no doubt that whatever he'd said had been deeply insulting to the man. But how could he get out of this situation without fighting?

He was still thinking this over when a hand pulled him back, knocking him to the ground. He heard the figure say several incomprehensible words, and then saw the Astograthian man storm away, obviously unhappy, but appeased.

The figure turned, and he saw it was James. He shook his head.

"What did that guy want?'

James chuckled. "When you're in a foreign country, please try not to call their country ridiculous, nor should you utter the name of their mortal enemies when you've already enraged them."

"Thanks, I'll remember that, next time I'm in Astograth."

"The reason I'm here is that Guval told me you'd be here. I need another installment of your life story."

"Sure, although obviously I play tomorrow night. How about tomorrow early morning? But I'd rather not do it next to thousands of years of stone and altars."

Thinking about the situation that night, Alec remembered another situation when he'd been amazed, and it was very relevant to the Baptism of Fire.

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Alec wasn't supposed to be out this late, and he was sure that his parents would give him a stern lecture when he finally did go home. But he'd heard such yelling and screaming coming from this vacant lot that he couldn't stay away.

He rounded the corner of the alley and turned to his right and saw dozens of people lining the sides of the lot, watching something in the middle intently. And then he saw a goal, and he immediately knew what was going on. They were playing football. He didn't know why this intrigued him so (hadn't he played football dozens of times on the farm, with his uncle or dad serving as goalkeeper?), but he couldn't bring himself to walk away.

He found his way to the edge of the crowd, and since he had only just turned ten, he couldn't see over the three or four deep mass of people. He managed to wriggle between a fat, rotund man, and crawled between the legs of a woman, before he had reached the rope that evidently separated the crowd from the players, and as he discovered, also served as the touchline.

The ball was currently in the far left corner, with a tall defender in white and a chunky attacker in yellow fighting over the ball. The attacker came out on top, and dribbled to the edge of the box, where the already sparse grass completely disappeared. The goalie, wearing a purple T-shirt that was too big for him, rushed out to try to stop him, but he couldn't quite make it before the attacker knocked a ball into the middle, where another yellow was waiting to blast into the goal.

Alec must have been on the white team's side, for the people around him groaned, and across the lot, he could see people jumping up and down in jubilation. Taking his focus away from the game for a moment, he began to pick up snippets of conversation from the fellow fans around him.

"I don't think we can come back from 2-0 now," said an elderly gentleman with a cane.

"These Lions are too good for us," said a lanky man dressed in a suitcoat.

"This year's Warriors just aren't good enough," said the woman he'd crawled under.

"Let's hope our U12s are decent. Then maybe in 8 years, we will have some good players."

It was this last comment that intrigued Alec the most. Could it be that around here, in New Swansea, they had teams for 10-year olds like him. In leagues? Where they might have jerseys, or at least a coach?

He turned to the woman, who was now intently focused on the field, where the yellows had earned themselves another corner.

"Ma'am?"

She looked down. "What do you want?"

"Well I was just wondering what was going on here? Who's playing?"

"Why the Lions vs. the Warriors, of course. It's the first week of the Southern New Swansea season."

He must have had as blank a stare on his face as he felt in his mind, because the woman lightened up a bit.

"You must be new around here. So you know football, right? So anyway, here in southern New Swansea, after all, that's where we are, there's 6-8 teams every season that play games against each other for a title. Then the champion plays the champions of the North, East, and West New Swansea leagues, so they can go on to national tournaments and things."

"Thank you. And did someone say there's teams for kids like me?"

'Why yes! Do you play football?"

He nodded, even though it wasn't really true.

"You should come back out here in a week, there will be tryouts."

And so, just one week later, his rear end still smarting from the spanking his father had given him for getting home past 10 o'clock at night, Alec Vordeau walked onto a football field for the first time in his life.

------------

"Hey, look, James, I have to get to the stadium. I'll have to finish this later."

He almost forgot his coffee, but he reached back and grabbed it, before leaving the restaurant and a bemused James behind.

The Sports Register

Another 4-1 Victory for the Roaring Dragons

Welsh Cowboy won again at the 53rd Baptism of Fire, defeating Alkoul 4-1 at Goyaingenura Stadium in Arexa, Astograth. The win leaves Welsh Cowboy on top of Group C.

As in their first match, the Roaring Dragons opened the scoring early. This time the first tally came in the 11th minute. After earning a free kick from around 25 yards out on the right side of the box, Thomas Kramer chipped a ball into the box. Matthew Guval out jumped the Alkoul defender assigned to him, giving him his second goal of the tournament and Welsh Cowboy's third headed goal of the BoF.

Alkoul would not go away easily, though, as midfielder Seth Louis stole a pass deep in his own half and was off to the races. He made Dragons back Geoff Bagen look silly as he easily rounded him, leaving him one-on-one with goalie William Jackson, who had no chance as Louis cut around him and tapped the ball into the open net.

Welsh Cowboy dominated possession in the first half, but the scoresheet did not reflect the 65-35 possession breakdown at the break. Alkoul managed to keep the Dragons from scoring again in the first 45 minutes, although an Alec Vordeau strike from the edge of the box that hit the underside of the goalpost, but didn't go in, seemed to be divinely kept out.

The Dragons took the lead again, in the 50th minute, when left midfielder Sergio Calabana played Guval through on goal. Although Guval could have attempted a shot, he cut the ball back, found a streaking Vordeau, and Vordeau was only too happy to put the ball in the bottom right corner, giving the WC captain his first goal of the game.

Up 2-1, the Dragons continued to seek another goal, combining in the midfield and attacking third to open up more chances on goal. Alkoul keeper Jeff Fisher parried a volley from 8 yards away by Lucas Burns, as well as a leaping header off a corner by Guval. However, he couldn't keep the score at 2, for in the 71st minute, Thomas Kramer worked the ball down the sideline, before turning and crossing a high floater to the massed Dragons in the box. The chance fell to right back Jean Bapun, who placed a dart into the upper left corner, giving WC a lead of 2.

The scoring was not quite over, as in the 84th minute, 19-year old phenom Patrick Teller, who had come on in relief of Lucas Burns, received a pass on the left side of the box. He proceeded to roll the ball through the defender's legs, avoid a sliding tackle from another back, and then perfectly place a shot past the keeper. His teammates immediately mobbed him, and the Welsh Cowboy contingent of fans began chanting "Patrick! Patrick!" The teenager smiled broadly.

After the game, manager George Pingrell seemed to be relaxed and satisfied, although, he did have one criticism: "We can't let people run clean through on William. That just won't work, especially when we get to the World Cup."

Through two games, Welsh Cowboy is top of Group C with 6 points and a +6 goal differential.

Match Summary:
11': GOAL M. Guval (Welsh Cowboy) (1-0 WC)
26': GOAL S. Louis (Alkoul) (1-1)
50': GOAL A. Vordeau (Welsh Cowboy) (2-1 WC)
71': GOAL J. Bapun (Welsh Cowboy) (3-1 WC)
80': YC A. Kleppner (Welsh Cowboy)
84': GOAL P. Teller (Welsh Cowboy) (4-1 WC)
88': YC S. Louis (Alkoul)

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