What's in your office?

[Linux and the X]

Since I have lots of pictures and don't want to turn this into picspam, linky.
What'd'you have?

[Quintessence of Dust]

OOC: Not sure if this is what you're angling at, but this brings back memories of this thread.

[Linux and the X]

OOC: Not sure if this is what you're angling at, but this brings back memories of this thread.

Indeed. I hope no one minds me replicating a now-unusable thread.

[The Eternal Kawaii]

We haven't remodeled ours much, but since we've had a change in government we need to update our description.

The NSUN WA Nunciate of the Holy Otaku Diaspora Church of the Eternal Kawaii is, of course, a model of HOCEK Kawaiian design and taste. Which is to say, very cute. The Nunciate is located unfortunately on the 9th floor across the hall from the Embassy of Omigodtheykilledkenny, the HOCEK's mortal enemies these days somewhere in the WA building. We're not sure where the gnomes put us in relation to the Kennyites; but knowing their sense of humor, it wouldn't surprise us to find out we're neighbors again. A series of tastefully decorated wards demarcates the line (both physical and spiritual) between Kennyite heathen diplomatic territory and that belonging to the HOCEK Diaspora Church.

Through the ornate hand-carved and pastel polychromed doorway of the Nunciate lies a labyrinth of offices, decorated with pictures of cute animals, flowers, and assorted picturesque scenes from the HOCEK lands of the Eternal Kawaii before the coming of Lord Gojira. The outer offices are mainly devoted to the Nunciate Happiness Police detachment, where the sailor-suit clad young ladies are commonly found inspecting arrivals to ensure that nothing ecchi is permitted within the sacrosanct precincts further in.

Once past the HP guardpost, a vistor will find the entire office interior has been remodeled according to the Concave of Beauty's Kawaiians' best feng shui theoreticians to provide the optimal level of spiritual harmony. Beside the main offices for the Nuncio Nuncia and his subordinates her nekomusume staff within the Conclave of Friendship ambassadorial staff, there are separate wings for the representatives from the Conclave of Beauty and Conclave of Peace Council of Elders and various Kawaiian tribal representatives. Each wing has rings of outer and inner offices, depending on the rank of otaku it services the inner offices currently being used for top-security intelligence work, including the (no longer oprational) Exodus Device.

The Nuncio and his deputy Nuncia and her First Secretary occupy separate offices in the innermost ring, just outside of the Shrine of the Cute-One-As-Protector-Of-The-Faithful-Amongst-The-Heathen. This enormous edifice, basically a room with an oversized statue of the Cute One in Its usual beneficent pose, is placed in such a fashion as to provide direct line-of-sight (at least on a map, walls being what they are) of the Shrine of the Manifestation found in the UN WA Strangers' Bar. This permits junior otaku embassy personnel who ordinarily would be forbidden to set foot in the bar (due to the overwhelming presense of heathen foreigners) to perform the necessary prayers for the Manifestation without fear of foreign contact.

In addition to providing proper spiritual harmony, the design and layout of the Nunciate is such as to enable the otaku nekomusume and other staff to recognize the correct direction (towards Mount Sanrio in their homeland) to face during the Seven Daily Prayers. These, btw, are dispersed throughout the day from dawn til dusk, and the sound of the call-to-prayer is regularly heard booming throughout the 9th floor where the Kawaiian Nunciate is located, over the sounds of the degenerate Kennyite music anyone unfortunate enough to have an office next door.

[Glen-Rhodes]

Unofficially? Numerous types of torture devices.

[Bears Armed]

Apart from the various refrigerators and mini-bars that some of our staff have "salvaged" from the offices of various departing missions? Good question, I'll have to check...

[Enistopia]

Office Stuff? O_o

[Cobdenia]

Sir Cyril's Office is fairly well appointed, with a parquet floor, wood pannelled walls, and a traditional Cobdenian rug or two. Along one side (facing you as you enter) is a book case and a sideboard containing family photos and trinkets, the other side a grandfather clock (next to a leather backed door to the outer office) and a well covered hatstand, to the left is a large portrait of HM King George V, and smaller paintings HE Sir Gonville Cunniwarren and Sir Cyril himself flanking it, over the top of a fairly ornate fireplace that is usually kept roaring. Facing the fireplace are a leather three peice suite and wooden coffee table. To the right is a 19th century desk and associated chairs, on top of which is a dial telephone, blotting paper and pen set, and a large and full in tray and a near empty out tray. Underneath the desk is a military idiot armed with a Lee-Enfield

[Omigodtheykilledkenny]

Office Stuff? O_o

OOC: That's great. Why don't we save this thread for posts that are actually worth reading, like Cob's or TEK's posts? Take the mindless banter to General.

[Enistopia]

Thank You, someone who agrees with me!

[Ainocra]

A cache of advanced weaponry and a suitcase sized nuclear device.

[Omigodtheykilledkenny]

If this entire thread is going to be spam posts, it should probably be locked.

[The Palentine]

The Palentine's office is located on the third floor, thanks to some bribes....err....gifts to the Staff of the WA Building Management. The Suite has offices, a shower, shooting range, and a well stocked bar. There is also a aquarium tank large enough for a couple of Dolphins, at the entryway. thanks to a portal located in the tank, it is staffed by a revolving staff of Palentine Naval Dolphins. These foul mouthed scourges of the southern seas act as greeters to the various guests wishing to do business with the Palentine delgation. Guests that run the gauntlet will find various staff members busy at work or downloading porn from the internet. Some of the male members of the delegation will also be ogling Senator Sulla's very buxom secretary, Velma Wong. What you ask? Because she once was a very popular burlesque star. Guests be warned.....ogling is fine, touching is not allowed, and will be punished by a damn fine right cross from Ms. Wong. Finally we enter the nest of depravity known as Senator Sulla's Office, which could probally be best described as something from either the very bowels of hell, or President Manuelo Fernanda's bedroom. It depends on how you look at such matters.

[A mean old man]

Well, I've racked up at least four or five printers stolen from the offices of retired ambassadors...

[Enn]

... You guys actually have offices? I've been making do with a filing cabinet next to the door of the Strangers' Bar, and with resigning from the Delegacy, I may not even have that!

[Khorata]

I have the WA General Chamber as my unofficial office. When I ever enter the WA, I will still use it as my office and renovate it to be a office, just a 25 pound desk, a 2,000 dollar computer, a 25 pound chair and a 1,000 dollar printer, but right now, it looks like this.



Yes, when that is renovating and for the forseeable future, I would personally move the entire WA chamber to A mean old man's office, and he will have to share it with the rest of the WA.

[A mean old man]

Yes, when that is renovating and for the forseeable future, I would personally move the entire WA chamber to A mean old man's office, and he will have to share it with the rest of the WA.

*rubs hands together*

So many printers...

[Khorata]

Actually, Mr. Mean Ol' Man, it would be the new WA chamber. Eh?

[A mean old man]

Oh... that doesn't include everyone else's offices? Screw it, then.

EDIT: Though the WA chamber probably has one damn big printer for those flag-sized print-outs of proposals and resolutions we're always marking up in here.

[Unibotian WASC Mission]

Pascal S. Wager is the current vice ambassador for Unibot and is the only consistent member of the higher representatives of the Unibotian delegation (Eduard Heir, the official ambassador, has been unstuck from time and just seems to wonder around the place, drinking and stinking of gin.)

Wager has two offices, he conducts most of his affairs on the Monorail in between the World Assembly Headquarters, and the Security Council Headquarters, its a bumpy quarters that beeps and quakes, and is crammed with ambassadors, drunks and tourists on either the departure or arrival trip depending on if the WA resolution at to vote is a Security Council or General Assembly proposal. Wager also notes the lack of a working printer on the Monorail, however enjoys the view of Lake Security Council that its windows boast.

Wager's other office, which was given to him recently by the Lanos delegation is his official Security Council office. Its a windowless janitorial closet in the basement, that Wager managed to squeeze a desk into. The broken printer was stolen by A Mean Old Man, and the fishbowl is full of fish that Wager took with him after he was adjudicated against for bribing delegates. The fish are now dead, poisoned by Pascal in a controlled experiment. Across the room, one can find a eight-ball named "Tori" to which all questions regarding Unibotian diplomatic policies should be directed to first, before bothering the vice ambassador. The legend is that Eduard Heir's spirit lives on in the eight-ball, the truth is that Tori was the name of Pascal Wager's unrequited love, who was now off in the far amazons of Unibot in an archeological dig -- leaving Wager to be a lazy politician that drank too much (However, Eduard use to say "A politician can never drink too much!").

[Omigodtheykilledkenny]

The layout of the Kennyite offices at the WA HQ has changed in recent months, ever since the government (to its chagrin) discovered that the WA was actually a reality program and that it had been duped into joining. Whereas before our facilities were meant to suit the individual office needs of delegation members, their primary purpose now seems to be annoying the hell out of as many people as possible.

Kennyite offices are located on the third floor, adjacent to the Palentine's. The reception area also shares a wall with The Palentine's entry area, and instead of a wall, visitors have a direct view into the Palentine's dolphin tank. This way the dolphins can shock and appall guests to both office suites. Meanwhile, our frat-boy WA intern Ryan (was that his name?) still sits behind the reception desk, earbuds in all the time so as better to ignore anyone who might actually need his help, conducting "research" on his computer that must be related to human sexuality...or something, and shouting "WHOO!! Kenny rules" at the mere mention of our national mascot's name. (Ryan should have graduated from college years ago, we assume, but he appears to be operating on a six- or eight-year scholarship of some kind...)

Toward the back of the reception area is a hallway leading to other rooms of the office suite. At the other end of the suite are a small training area/topless bar where our Commandos can perfect their "combat" skills, and private chambers reserved for President Fernanda when he visits. The interior walls to both these chambers are soundproofed so as not to disturb anyone else in the Kennyite office suite -- but not the outer perimeter. This is so that the nation on the other side of the walls can still enjoy the loud music (and any other random noises) emanating from within. We don't know for sure, but we think that the lucky nation (once again) is The Eternal Kawaii! (Yes, Nuncia, the gnomes do a have a great sense of humor!)

Meanwhile, the center area of the suite, has been converted into a state-of-the-art holding cell for our sometime ambassador, Susa Batko-Yovino. He had been previously confined in a military prison on Tiki Taki, but he complained that breaking out of that jail and having to travel all the way here to raise hell was just not logistically sound, and we agreed, so he's been transferred here -- over the objections of locals who'd rather not live so close to a suspected terrorist. It is rumored that this cell includes a private entryway to Manuelo Fernanda's suite, so that the ambassador and Cdr. Chiang can make good use of it when the president's not around, further annoying-- er, "entertaining" our Kawaiian neighbors.

Finally, the mini-suite formerly housing our deputy ambassador's office has been converted into a luxurious green room, so that visiting diplomats and dignitaries can safely view their favorite reality show without fear of being chucked out the window, hit in the face with pastries, or blown up by our ambassador.

[Sionis Prioratus]

Unofficially? Numerous types of torture devices.

Oh my Goddess! This is perverted beyond belief.

Yours in utter shock and disgust,

[Sionis Prioratus]

We could repeal World Assembly Headquarters and replace it with guidelines for more extravagant offices and meeting chambers. Of course we would need to submit both at the same time.

Why? We find the WA office of our Delegation to be quite adequate, thank you:



Yours,

[Mediterreania]

Our ambassador has build a complex tunnel system out of discarded wrappers, empty cans and rotting food. This tunnel system, nicknamed "Satan's Bathroom" by other delegates, is located near Stanger's Bar and guarded by a cadre of unstable, trigger-happy and/or intoxicated ISA agents.

[Linux and the X]

Oh... that doesn't include everyone else's offices? Screw it, then.

EDIT: Though the WA chamber probably has one damn big printer for those flag-sized print-outs of proposals and resolutions we're always marking up in here.

I stole that months ago. No one's complained because I've been nice enough to print shit for them.