Stoklomolvi Central News Agency

[Stoklomolvi]

For more information, visit the Stoklomolvi Central News Agency page at Wikistates.

The Stoklomolvi Central News Agency (Russian: Стокломолвское центральное информационное агентство, Stoklomolvskoe central'noe informacionnoe agentstvo, simplified Chinese: 斯脱克中央通讯社; traditional Chinese: 斯脫克中央通訊社; pinyin: Sītuōkè Zhōngyāng Tōngxùnshè), commonly abbreviated as the SCNA, is the state media apparatus of the Stoklomolvi Communist Federation. Beneath the SCNA was the Stoklomolvi Wire Service, which went defunct by 1946 in favour of the SCNA. The SCNA runs all television networks, Internet sites, radio networks, and newspapers that concern reporting of distribution of information and news. It is the only legal and the only known existing news agency in Stoklomolvi, as private news is outlawed. The SCNA is an institution of the State Council of Stoklomolvi, and is controlled by the Media Commissariat, and is one of the primary distributors that use the SCFNet domestic internet system.

The SCNA employs around 122,000 personnel total and maintains 89 bureaus in Stoklomolvi; there is one bureau in each administrative capital and three other bureaus that report on the military, the CPS, and the state intelligence service. Abroad, the SCNA maintains 531 bureaus to collect information about foreign countries and dispense any important information about Stoklomolvi. Official SCNA publications are printed in _ languages: Chinese, Russian, French, German, Portuguese, Italian, Romanian, Spanish, English, Arabic, Hindi, Korean, Japanese, Dutch, Danish, Norwegian, Swedish, Bulgarian, wat, wat, and wat.

Vladistov provides full funding to the SCNA, and its budget is managed by the Finance Commissariat. As the SCNA is a non-profit, government-owned corporation, it does not use advertising nor any form of promotion; it is a strictly news reporting agency, and does not deviate from this objective.

Stoklomolvi Wire Service [defunct]: viewtopic.php?f=23&t=8360

[News from the Stoklomolvi Communist Federation may be found here. Do not post any OOC without an IC accompaniment or a response to another IC in this thread. In other words, only post comments, and responses to comments. One-liners and separate conversations not welcome.

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[Stoklomolvi]

 
 
Domestic News - War on Fascism

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Anti-fascism in Stoklomolvi prevails as last fascist stronghold crumbles
Vigilantism and citizen guards aided PLA in strikes

Following several incidents involving fascist uprisings amongst the increasingly militant Russian population of Stoklomolvi, the government acted and cracked down on numerous groups, annihilating some through violence and successfully dissuading others. Upon the cornering of the fascists to the mountain ranges to the west, out of desperation the fascists abducted innumerable children and impressionable people and taught them about the failings of the Stoklomolvi system. The children, who were returned home after the PLA raids released them to their guardians, were supposedly "puzzled" by the boisterous tirades.

Fascism falls forever

A rapid poll conducted via SCFNet revealed that 3,951,402,333 out of 3,951,402,359 who responded approved of the government's actions; the remainder either did not care or proclaimed that the government was not harsh enough. Interestingly enough, the final strong-point held by the fascists was in the largely socialist majority city of Moskva, where almost no fascists were found in a poll conducted two months prior to the Communist Party incident. An observer from the People's Security Service had infiltrated a classroom where fascism was being touted as "the only way people can achieve enlightenment," the tag-line of the failed state in GWO that is being torn apart by foreign fascists themselves. Disgust was visible on the faces of many in the classroom, and after the fascist agitator finished his lecture half the room started throwing the pamphlets and books that the fascists distributed at the man. Once other fascists in other classrooms took note of this incident, they entered the classroom and pointed their guns at the civilians.

As the observer had access to the SCFNet at the time, he managed to post a notification to the local People's Security Service bureau, which in turn notified the PLA. The ensuing strike, which entered through the roof of the building, forced all of the fascists to evacuate the structure before they were mowed down in the streets by a PLA patrol en route to the uprising zone. With the last act of violence committed, fascism was no more, and the government unbanned the fascist ideology from discussion.

"Nobody gives a damn any more"

To the apparent dismay of the general public, the Stoklomolvi government decision to unban the ideology was a step to reversing the previous ban on the ideology earlier this year. In short, as given by a representative of the Stoklomolvi government at an SCNA interview, "Fascism is an ideology that is hated by virtually everyone who is not oppressed by the fascist boot itself. In Stoklomolvi, it is regarded with the same importance as a farmer regards the number of plastic bottles consumed per capita in Oseato. Nobody gives a damn any more." The response to the statement was overwhelming approval, which baffled the government.

Copyright 2009 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
URL: http://www.scna.gov.scf/articles/214398570/
© 2009 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency

[Stoklomolvi]

 
 
Domestic News - Ethnic Cleansing

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Stoklomolvi announces intention to perform ethnic cleansing
Population pleased with the decision, according to rapid poll

With the Christmas spirit floating around across the world, the government of Stoklomolvi sought to make its contribution through an ethnic cleansing plan that would affect generations to come. Across the country, volunteers arose to aid in the ethnic cleansing program, praising the virtues of such a generous agenda and the subsequent benefits that it would bring. Over seven million tonnes of soap and sanitation equipment have already been distributed, with a planned fifty million tonnes total by 2020 to be delivered to all of the underdeveloped areas in Stoklomolvi.

The Commissar of Stoklomolvi, Vladimir Mikhailovich Stuyonovich, fully endorsed the plan pushed forward by the Stoklomolvi Internal Affairs Commissariat, and personally congratulated the Commissar of the SIAC for his ingenuity.

Copyright 2009 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
URL: http://www.scna.gov.scf/articles/215340978/
© 2009 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency

[Stoklomolvi]

 
 
International News - Tyrrhenia

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Government of GWO hanging by a thread
Leader of GWO "Griffith-II" makes delusional rant to mark new year

Article from the desk of Commissar of Stoklomolvi Vladimir Stuyonovich, 14 January 2010

The so-called "Fascist Federation of GWO," a small fascist country with a holding in Tyrrhenia, has once again bested our highest expectations of psychological failures and has shown its face, the face that nobody actually wishes to see but is shown anyway for the sensationalist reaction that would be expected from such a debacle. Such is the GWO; nobody in the world wants it to exist, and GWO does not want anyone else to exist except itself. One must wonder why GWO even seeks to involve itself in the affairs of the world, considering how it narcissistically considers itself above all else and does not actually seem to want any contact. Within its own bubble of tyranny and despair, GWO rests alone, constantly trying to appease itself with its fantasies of "eliminating the world of socialists" and "spreading the Enlightened ideology across the world," completely ignorant of the fact that socialism will always exist and the "Enlightened ideology" refers to Buddhism, not fascism.

Maintenance of the supposed "prosperity and power" of the failed fascist fools in GWO is the "first and foremost goal"; this statement within itself shows that GWO is insane. It is impossible to maintain something that does not exist in the first place, and as GWO uses fascism in its operations this goal would be impossible to achieve anyway. A country cannot be prosperous and powerful when there are uprisings constantly and troops drilling about to keep order without which the government would collapse like a stack of poorly refrigerated Zimbabwean raw chicken eggs. And on the notion of an "End War," which to virtually everyone in the world except apparently GWO means nothing, the fear that was supposed to be instilled by such words ended up being mockery and contempt. What "End War"? Does this refer to that failure of a capitalist pigdog video game by Tom Clancy? Or does this refer to a war that ends GWO? If the latter, then we rejoice, for there is nothing better than the ceased existence of GWO.

This speech from GRIFFITH-II, instead of being the rousing speech it was intended to be, will likely bring the world to laugh and jeer at the GWO, which to date does nothing but rant and rave and kill its own population before failing in a war abroad. We fail to see the "power" of fascism, and we have no scruples that the rest of the sane world sees the same.

And then I release a transcript from paragraph three, page fourteen of my speech that is to be released on the first day of the lunar new year. This paragraph will likely not be published, seeing as to how GWO clearly plagiarised from us.

"Comrades, we all know that soaps and oils are of vital importance to the skin of every man, woman, and child in Stoklomolvi. Our first and foremost goal, of course, is the maintenance of the Federation's cleanliness. Arguably, there is no higher goal of any country with functioning leadership. Our sanitation system is one of the best in the region, one of the few that distributes soaps and oils freely to its population, for as long as there are no threats to the continuing status of our sanitation system as glorious. Our power lies within the dedication and passion of millions of men and women serving the Stoklomolvi Sanitation Commissariat. They serve you all the time, ready to be deployed into an unclean hell-hole at a moment's notice, and very often summoned to fight the scourge. Thus, we announce our second and third goals: the spread of free sanitation and the curbing of the growth of the bacterial-viral menaces."

Copyright 2010 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
URL: http://www.scna.gov.scf/articles/243950178/
© 2010 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency

[Stoklomolvi]

The Liaoist Manifesto.

 
 
International News - World

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Stoklomolvi begins distributing the Liaoist Manifesto
Government freely distributes Liaoist Manifesto for first time in over a century

With the lack of any patriotic movements within Stoklomolvi due to the recent attempted coup that killed nearly the entire government, the new administration under Vladimir Stuyonovich decided to begin publishing once more its Liaoist doctrine for the world to see. Millions upon millions of pamphlets were freely distributed to the population of Stoklomolvi itself, which had been in SCNA polls clamouring for official Liaoist pamphlets for quite some time. To neighbouring nations, such as Soviet Republik and Kagetora, several hundred million pamphlets total were printed and distributed, with millions more to come.

On the Internet, the Stoklomolvi Technology Commissariat posted the Liaoist Manifesto on various discussion boards and forums under various usernames, with many coming from more veteran board members due to the monitoring of many sites by the Technology Commissariat. With the hopes that people would consider Liaoism to be a legitimate socialist ideology and one that pre-dated Maoism and even Marxism, the Stoklomolvi government has promoted constructive discussion about Liaoism in said forums. The response so far has been neutral.

Domestically, the distribution of the Liaoist Manifesto to Stoklomolvi people was a huge success. Counties across the country reported surges in nationalism and morale, sometimes to rather dangerous levels. The Stoklo-Siberian War slowed for three days after the distribution began, with both sides taking the time to read before going back to killing each other. As Liaoism had not been promoted for over a century, and had simply worked silently in the background, few knew of what the Liaoist Manifesto actually stated besides intelligentsia working in libraries and government offices.

Criticism emerges from rightist sectors

The capitalists and rightists in Stoklomolvi, mostly based out of Xianggang and Aomen, criticised the document for being "an affront to liberty, freedom, and all the rights that people should hold dear." Several protests were held in the streets of Xianggang by said critics of the Liaoist Manifesto, with counter-demonstrations held by supporters of the government. In response to the criticism, the Stoklomolvi government assured that "[the Liaoist Manifesto] has obviously changed in meaning and intent over the course of three hundred years, as there is no possible way people would still be thrown off cliffs in the year two thousand fifteen." A few fears were palliated, but the protests continue.

One protester in particular, a liberal economics professor named Richard Heyiakyk from Helsingfors in western Stoklomolvi, stated, "It is a great shame to see Stoklomolvi heading further down the path towards tyranny and oppression of basic human freedoms, such as the right to publish whatever the people wish to publish and the right to express speech however the people wish to express it. Unlike prosperous, free nations like Santheres and Praetonia, Stoklomolvi will forever remain in the dark ages in which persons cannot join together to form corporations and in which the right to smoke, drink alcohol, and consume caffeine are oppressed to the degree of non-existence. Liaoism is a bane on society, ironically enough, since it claims to support it."

In response, professors who believed Liaoism was beneficial to society banned Heyiakyk from their universities' research laboratories for "undermining the moral authority of the family." Professor Vladimir Angle from Moskva proclaimed, "Heyiakyk is a delusional man who does not understand the basic tenets of Liaoism. The national family, as Liao Jinshi put it in his enlightened work, is a very superb tool for keeping the nation together and for promoting equality and individual freedoms everywhere. Certainly, we must exchange some of our abilities to do certain things for security and stability, but what we receive is far greater than what we must sacrifice."

Copyright 2012 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
URL: http://www.scna.gov.scf/articles/475624012010/
© 2012 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency

[Stoklomolvi]

From A Rough in the Diamonds. Thread was retconned.
Government of Novaya Zemlya declares police action against Östland Stoklomolvi central government displeased by the initiative from autonomous Novaya Zemlya The government of Novaya Zemlya, an ethnic Mwavi state, recently published findings from its "All Across Africa" [AAA] ethnicity investigation. Many pieces of previously unknown data were discovered in the northern horn of Africa, and invaluable insight into the living habits and daily routines of the Mabagankondekua and Nǃxovimbusoguramharab peoples in southern Africa were revealed to the people of the world. However, one piece of information was reported by the Mwavi investigation prompted much outcry and public outrage amongst the people of Novaya Zemlya. The origin of this particular report was Östland, a Leistungi colonial possession directly to the west of Novaya Zemlya. "Brutal killings and oppression of our people" A rapid survey conducted of the population of Novaya Zemlya revealed that 98% of the surveyed people called for immediate diplomatic reprimands of Leistung's conduct in Lisosian Africa, and that Leistung would be required to apologise for the affront to Mwavi people across the world. 58% demanded economic sanctions and punishments against Leistung for the actions, and a 24% called for war against Leistung. The report itself simply included a two-page document on Leistungi racism and attempted genocides against the Mwavi people living in Östland. "They have committed brutal killings and oppression of our people," stated one irate ethnic Mwavi citizen living in western Novaya Zemlya. "They must be punished for their wrongdoings, and they must learn that they cannot impose their unjust will upon innocent civilians who seek no more than to live freely." Stoklomolvi government officials have urged for calm, stating that the report "probably did not include all information and left out some crucial details that may place the Leistungi actions under a different light." However, the government of Novaya Zemlya, acting under the guiding principles of the Nǃxovimbusoguramharab ethnic codes that call for all members of the Mwavi people to be protected equally, has pressed for diplomatic action. An unnamed government representative said at a press conference, "We of Novaya Zemlya are a peaceful people. We do not want war, but we want Leistung to issue a public apology for what it has done to our people and call for Leistung to open its gates to further investigation." Dogma of hate In the tropical rainforest that covers much of the country, random interviews conducted revealed a general sentiment of anger and resentment towards the Leistungis. When asked why, the most common response was pamphlets had told them about oppression of the Mwavi people in Östland. The central government in Stoklomolvi labelled the message conveyed in the pamphlets as a "dogma of hate," and urged the government of Novaya Zemlya to increase its anti-jingoism efforts. While much affirmation was granted, a lockdown of the local congress due to an impasse between anti-military and jingoist party lines destroyed all legislative movement. No change in the stance of the government was stated, as the official position of Novaya Zemlya towards Leistungi ethnic oppression was still one of "peace and cooperation." More information will be revealed as the situation develops.Copyright 2010 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. URL: http://www.scna.gov.scf/articles/27483109/ © 2010 Stoklomolvi Central News Agency