[SILLY] GA Joke Proposals Only

[Calladan]

Title:Universal "Don't Come Here" Symbol for Halloween
Area:Human Rights
Effect:Super Strong

Noting that not everyone likes Halloween,

also noting that not everyone appreciates trick or treating,

additionally pointing out that not everyone wants strangers knocking on their door when it is dark,

comments that while five year olds dressed up in sheets asking for lollipops might be cute, teenagers in a plastic masks asking for money is far less cute and actually kind of scary,

and additionally points out that "turn of your porch light" only works if you have a porch light, or (indeed) a porch,

The WA forcefully & immediately hereby :-

1) requires member nations to come up with a universal symbol that tells these little buggers that their presence is not wanted

2) allows homeowners/renters/visitors to pour boiling oil on the little buggers should this symbol be ignored

3) suggests trick or treating be renamed "demanding money with menaces" and treated appropriately by the local constabulary

4) generally condemns the practice of sending your children out to strangers houses to knock on their door and ask for sweets as something that is not all that good an idea, since every other day of the year you generally tell your offspring DON'T TAKE SWEETS FROM STRANGERS

5) wishes the member states a happy halloween.

--xx--

there is a chance that since I moved in to my own home and I have had to deal with the little s*s that live in my neighbourhood I have become somewhat soured on the whole notion of this "wonderful custom" we appear to have imported from across the pond

[Tinfect]

Title:Universal "Don't Come Here" Symbol for Halloween
Area:Human Rights
Effect:Super Strong

Noting that not everyone likes Halloween,

also noting that not everyone appreciates trick or treating,

additionally pointing out that not everyone wants strangers knocking on their door when it is dark,

comments that while five year olds dressed up in sheets asking for lollipops might be cute, teenagers in a plastic masks asking for money is far less cute and actually kind of scary,

and additionally points out that "turn of your porch light" only works if you have a porch light, or (indeed) a porch,

The WA forcefully & immediately hereby :-

1) requires member nations to come up with a universal symbol that tells these little buggers that their presence is not wanted

2) allows homeowners/renters/visitors to pour boiling oil on the little buggers should this symbol be ignored

3) suggests trick or treating be renamed "demanding money with menaces" and treated appropriately by the local constabulary

4) generally condemns the practice of sending your children out to strangers houses to knock on their door and ask for sweets as something that is not all that good an idea, since every other day of the year you generally tell your offspring DON'T TAKE SWEETS FROM STRANGERS

5) wishes the member states a happy halloween.

--xx--

there is a chance that since I moved in to my own home and I have had to deal with the little s*s that live in my neighbourhood I have become somewhat soured on the whole notion of this "wonderful custom" we appear to have imported from across the pond

[Leppikania]

Repeal "Child Protection Act"

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Category: Social Justice | Strength: Mild | Proposed By: Leppikania

---

Description: WA General Assembly Resolution #19: Child Protection Act (Category: Human Rights; Strength: Significant) shall be struck out and rendered null and void.

Argument: 이 결의안은 국가 주권을 침해하고 우리는 그것을 제거 할 필요가있다. 실제 생활에서, 핵은 금지, 나는 그것을 통과되기 전에이 폐지 될 필요가있는 그들을 금지 큐에 제안을 가지고있다. 우리는 모든 사람에게 인종이나 성별에 관계없이 투표 할 권리를 포기하지 않는 사람을 처벌하기 위해 세계 총회의 선출 위원으로위원회를 구성해야한다. 이 작업을 폐지하려고 누구는 즉시 안전 보장 이사회가 비난해야한다. Somenationia 글.

So, basically, this was my attempt at making the TRUE most illegal proposal.

This resolution is infringing on national sovereignity and we need to get rid of it. In real life, nukes are banned, and I have a proposal in the queue banning them which needs this to be repealed before it can be passed. We should make a committee of elected members of the World Assembly to punish anybody who does not give everybody a right to vote regardless of race or gender. Anybody who tries to repeal this should be immediately condemned by the Security Council. Written by Somenationia.

[Umeria]

Repeal "Child Protection Act"

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Category: Social Justice | Strength: Mild | Proposed By: Leppikania

---

Description: WA General Assembly Resolution #19: Child Protection Act (Category: Human Rights; Strength: Significant) shall be struck out and rendered null and void.

Argument: 이 결의안은 국가 주권을 침해하고 우리는 그것을 제거 할 필요가있다. 실제 생활에서, 핵은 금지, 나는 그것을 통과되기 전에이 폐지 될 필요가있는 그들을 금지 큐에 제안을 가지고있다. 우리는 모든 사람에게 인종이나 성별에 관계없이 투표 할 권리를 포기하지 않는 사람을 처벌하기 위해 세계 총회의 선출 위원으로위원회를 구성해야한다. 이 작업을 폐지하려고 누구는 즉시 안전 보장 이사회가 비난해야한다. Somenationia 글.

So, basically, this was my attempt at making the TRUE most illegal proposal.

This resolution is infringing on national sovereignity and we need to get rid of it. In real life, nukes are banned, and I have a proposal in the queue banning them which needs this to be repealed before it can be passed. We should make a committee of elected members of the World Assembly to punish anybody who does not give everybody a right to vote regardless of race or gender. Anybody who tries to repeal this should be immediately condemned by the Security Council. Written by Somenationia.

You forgot amendments.

[States of Glory WA Office]

I think that the 'let's break every proposal rule' joke has run its course. It's time to move on.

[Imperium Anglorum]

I think that the 'let's break every proposal rule' joke has run its course. It's time to move on.

Agreed.

[Umeria]

I think that the 'let's break every proposal rule' joke has run its course. It's time to move on.

Only Make Complete Rule-Breaking Proposal Acts Act

Acknowledging I have already made a resolution that unquestionably breaks every GA proposal rule;

Apparently people are still trying to break every rule even though it has already been done.

Why try to halt the inevitable tide;

Hereby mandates that all proposals posted in this thread must be complete rule-breaking attempts.

[Tinhampton]

Repeal "Only Make Complete Rule-Breaking Proposal Acts Act"

Category: Human Rights

Effect: Very strong!

Optionality: Even STRONGER!

---

DESCRIPTION: The World Assembly,
Noting that Tinhampton has recently been informed by the Secretariat's Council that the World Assembly must repeal the "Only Make Complete Rule-Breaking Proposal Acts Act",
Opining, in addition, that, if the proposal was not made, a raid would be carried out on the International NatSov Organisation headquarters in Hugetopia,
Thirdly pointing out that the "Only Make Complete Rule-Breaking Proposal Acts Act" can easily lead to removal of joke proposals on other pressing world issues, like bureaucracy and whether you should round the batting average of cricketers up or down, simply for not completely breaking the rules,
Observing that this is absolutely not a joke proposal, for if it were, this proposal would already be rejected amongst World Assembly Members, although your nation's delegation probably knew that already,
Terrified that the "Only Make Complete Rule-Breaking Proposal Acts Act" could lead to a substantial crackdown amongst innocent joke proposal writers who only flock to the discussion chamber concerning joke proposals to make joke proposals on a diverse range of issues, and
Recognising that you can easily sneak in illegal and subliminal political messages through the back door in the modern-day Assembly,
HEREBY:
Unites to repeal the Only Make Complete Rule-Breaking Proposal Acts Act,
Mandates that... I forgot what I was going to say!
Promptly encourages NatSovs to chillax after realising that their multiversal headquarters are safe.

Co-authored by The Always 100% Accurate and Trustworthy Except When You're Refusing To Share Your Cheese (Seriously, How Selfish Are You?) of Mousebumples (who pointed out the raid proposals on the INSO HQ) and The United Kingdom of [REDACTED FOR PURPOSES OF INTERNATIONAL SECURITY] (who encouraged a standard large-print version).

Votes For: 8,472 (51%)
Votes Against: 8,292 (49%)

Implemented: Fri Oct 28 2016.

[Tinfect]

On Rulebreaking

Category: Our Collective Sanity

Strength: Majorly Annoyed

---

The General Assembly,

Noting the sudden influx of proposals seeking to break every rule simultaneously,

Recognizing that it was funny once, maybe twice, but that this has really gotten very out of hand,

Hereby,

Prohibits Rule Breaking in Proposals,

Defenestrates all rule-breakers, as this is all clearly their fault, and, as such, they deserve it,

Gives a swift kick to all rules-lawyers for their part in all this nonsense,

Beats all delegations opposed to this measure with a stick,

Informs all punished to build a bridge and get over it so that we can all be done with this,

[Imperium Anglorum]

Category: Lifesaving
Strength: Further Beyond

The World Assembly hereby invades all non-World Assembly members to bring them under the control of World Assembly law. The World Assembly further declares that because all resolutions take place immediately, all nations are under its rightful control.

The World Assembly now hereby declares that all former non-World Assembly lands under occupation by World Assembly members will gain metajurisdictional status, meaning that World Assembly law does not apply for the fifteen years after the first declaration of metajurisdictional status upon that territory.

The World Assembly now hereby reforms itself as the International Government; repeals the ideological ban rules regarding proposals; and forces all nations to conform to liberal democratic norms.

Salutes the End of History.

[States of Glory WA Office]

World Assembly Nuclear Weapons Act
Category: International Security | Strength: Strong

The World Assembly,

APPLAUDING prior legislation that grants member states the right to own nuclear weapons,

CONCERNED that non-members outnumber members a googolplex to one,

WISHING to ensure that member states are more powerful than non-members,

DISMISSING concerns that the statistics used in this resolution are lies or damned lies,

HEREBY:

1) DECLARES that member states must spend 100% of their budget on nuclear weapons,

2) OBLIGES member states to launch nuclear attacks on those member states which violate this resolution,

3) GRANTS to member states the exclusive right to launch nuclear attacks on non-member states without hesitation, discretion or common sense.

[Adab]

Drain the Swamp
Category: Bookkeeping | Strength: Sweeping

The World Assembly,

Informing that His Imperial Majesty the Emperor Tizqar III has been graced a revelation from the God above that the World Assembly is built on a swamp, literally and figuratively,

Concerned that the current state of affairs will lead to the ruin of this hallowed institution,

Aware of reports concerning, among others, disappearing emails, alleged sexting by delegates, officers setting up fraudulent universities, small loans made using money stolen from this institution, associates of certain delegates and officers dying suddenly under mysterious circumstances, possible sexual assaults, mafia ties, officers neglecting to pay taxes for up to two decades, racist and sexist remarks openly made in these hallowed halls, and rigged elections for certain offices of this institution.

Recognizing the urgent need of reform, from a political, financial, and environmental standpoint,

Hereby mandates that:
1. The swamp located on and around the headquarters of the World Assembly be drained,
2. All mosquitoes found on the headquarters be destroyed,
3. A probe be opened into the activities of every delegate, of every nation, that currently serves in the World Assembly,
4. All computers and mobile devices be seized that are found within the headquarters of the World Assembly,
5. Every single piece of data found within said computers and mobile devices be checked for any evidence of irregularity and tampering with the rules and laws of this hallowed institution, with a particular emphasis on emails, text messages, and social media conversations,
6. And a wall be built around the headquarters of the World Assembly, to ensure safety and security within the headquarters.

[Frustrated Franciscans]

I would just want to make a minor point of order that the World Assembly is built, not upon a swamp but upon a snake pit (and a festering one at that).

[Imperium Anglorum]

I do hope that everyone can get behind the destruction of mosquitoes, however.

[Kaboomlandia]

Squashing Mosquitoes With Sledgehammers Act

The World Assembly,

Aware that mosquitoes are annoying, pesky and common,

Recognizing that one good swing with a sledgehammer will kill a mosquito,

1. Mandates that all nations provide free sledgehammers to their citizens to squash mosquitoes with,

2. Prohibits nations from undertaking any "efficient" methods to kill mosquitoes, like draining swamps, because that's no fun.

[Roosevetania]

Recognizing Cheese Act

The World Assembly,

Aware that cheese is a good food,

Shocked the World Assembly has not recognized cheese,

Defines cheese as "a certain delicious dairy food that comes from a cow,"

Officially Recognizes cheese as a good food,

Creates the World Assembly Cheese Administration (WACA) to supervise and help global cheeses and to promote cheese worldwide,

Mandates that members provide citizens with sufficient amounts of cheese,

Urges citizens of member nations to eat the cheese,

Prohibits the use of the term that is disrespectful to cheese, "cut the cheese."

[Amuaplye]

GA Proposal #: ℵ0
Repeal the "Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Inception Act."

NOTICES that there are to many dumb proposals that are becoming Resolutions,
PROPOSES That we change our name back to the United Nations, because to hell with copyright law,
and REPEALS the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Inception Act. (GA: 10000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000)

My first one. Let me know your opinions.

[The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp]

GA Proposal #: ℵ0
Repeal the "Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Inception Act."

NOTICES that there are to many dumb proposals that are becoming Resolutions,
PROPOSES That we change our name back to the United Nations, because to hell with copyright law,
and REPEALS the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Repeal the Inception Act. (GA: 10000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000)

My first one. Let me know your opinions.

Not bad.

[Tinhampton]

A Potato in Every Hand Act

Category: Human Rights

Effect: YUUUUUUGE

Proposed by: Tinhampton

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DESCRIPTION: The World Assembly,
Noting that the Crashed Spaceship of The Salaxians lost out on the position of World Assembly Secretary-General to the Rose Commune of Caelapes in April,
Amazed that the Salaxians' only plan as WA Secretary-General was to give each and every citizen in every WA nation one potato,
Shocked both that the Salaxians lost, and that this plan was too limiting, and
Rightfully angered that some nations refuse to use World Census stats for their population,

HEREBY:
Bestows one potato upon each and every hand in the World Assembly,
Notes that all beings have two hands, except where there is a legitimate claim by the claimant person to the contrary, or species-based findings show that there is a differing number of hands on said species,
Aims to deliver new potatoes every two weeks,
Pins any blame on the failure of this resolution, whether due to population growth or otherwise, on the WorldWide Population Creation Organisation (W2PCO), which creates millions of new citizens in every nation (WA or not) at a random point in every day,
Attempts to ram through commendations for The Salaxians and an undisclosed group of four Senior [REDACTED] [REDACTED]s, if this act passes, and
Will alternately attempt to ram through an act doing the same as this act, except for tacos replacing potatoes, if this act fails.

Co-authored by nobody, because nobody tells Tinhampton how to write resolutions. Except the Diplomatic Immunity of Bears Armed Mission, who published an excellent guide on writing them, but that wasn't specifically directed at Tinhampton. Tinhampton will now stop referring to Tinhampton in the third person.

TINHAMPTON SEZ: To go on vote right after the GA's seventeenth letter of the alphabet is cleared.
TINHAMPTON ALSO SEZ: I had to edit this proposal - the previous one was dinged for containing a four-letter word starting with G and ending with E.

[The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp]

International Hot Chocolate Day
An international day where we come together drink some awesome hot chocolate
Category: Silly | Area of Effect: Liquids | Proposed by: The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp

The Nations of the World Assembly,


KNOWING hot chocolate is great
AWARE OF that this could be really really yummy
HEREBY enact the following:

1. Every WA member citizen and non WA member gets a free yuuge hot chocolate
2. The free yuuge hot chocolate will have whipped cream, there choose of what extra flavor to add or not to add and, lots of mini marshmallows
3. Everyone will have a good time and enjoy free yuuge hot chocolate

[Araraukar]

International Hot Chocolate Day
An international day where we come together drink some awesome hot chocolate
Category: Silly | Area of Effect: Liquids | Proposed by: The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp

The Nations of the World Assembly,


KNOWING hot chocolate is great
AWARE OF that this could be really really yummy
HEREBY enact the following:

1. Every WA member citizen and non WA member gets a free yuuge hot chocolate
2. The free yuuge hot chocolate will have whipped cream, there choose of what extra flavor to add or not to add and, lots of mini marshmallows
3. Everyone will have a good time and enjoy free yuuge hot chocolate

Whipped cream and marshmallows should be optional. Not everyone likes them and some are allergic to milk products. Also, would alcohol count as "extra flavor"?

[The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp]

International Hot Chocolate Day
An international day where we come together drink some awesome hot chocolate
Category: Silly | Area of Effect: Liquids | Proposed by: The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp

The Nations of the World Assembly,


KNOWING hot chocolate is great
AWARE OF that this could be really really yummy
HEREBY enact the following:

1. Every WA member citizen and non WA member gets a free yuuge hot chocolate
2. The free yuuge hot chocolate will have whipped cream, there choose of what extra flavor to add or not to add and, lots of mini marshmallows
3. Everyone will have a good time and enjoy free yuuge hot chocolate

Whipped cream and marshmallows should be optional. Not everyone likes them and some are allergic to milk products. Also, would alcohol count as "extra flavor"?

Yes it would.

Amendments made:

International Hot Chocolate Day
An international day where we come together drink some awesome hot chocolate
Category: Silly | Area of Effect: Liquids | Proposed by: The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp

The Nations of the World Assembly,


KNOWING hot chocolate is great
AWARE OF that this could be really really yummy
HEREBY enact the following:

1. Every WA member citizen and non WA member gets a free yuuge hot chocolate
2. The free yuuge hot chocolate will have optional whipped cream, there choose of what extra flavor to add or not to add and, lots of mini marshmallows that are optional
3. Everyone will have a good time and enjoy free yuuge hot chocolate

[Sierra Lyricalia]

I'm afraid Clause 3 is an ideological ban on cantankerous curmudgeonism and is therefore illegal.

I would also support the addition of a clause complaining that it's too goddamn warm and sunny out for this time of year, and urging a return to seasonable weather to maximize the enjoyability of these delicious beverages.

[The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp]

I'm afraid Clause 3 is an ideological ban on cantankerous curmudgeonism and is therefore illegal.

I would also support the addition of a clause complaining that it's too goddamn warm and sunny out for this time of year, and urging a return to seasonable weather to maximize the enjoyability of these delicious beverages.

I object to that legally challenge on the basis that being a grumpy grump is a choice and can be changed.

I will add another amendment saying that the weather can be complained about.

International Hot Chocolate Day
An international day where we come together drink some awesome hot chocolate
Category: Silly | Area of Effect: Liquids | Proposed by: The Derpy Democratic Republic Of Herp

The Nations of the World Assembly,


KNOWING hot chocolate is great
AWARE OF that this could be really really yummy
HEREBY enact the following:

1. Every WA member citizen and non WA member gets a free yuuge hot chocolate
2. The free yuuge hot chocolate will have optional whipped cream, there choose of what extra flavor to add or not to add and, lots of mini marshmallows that are optional
3. Nations are free to complain that the weather may or may not be seasonable weather for yuuge hot chocolate
4. Everyone will have a good time and enjoy free yuuge hot chocolate unless they choose to be a yuuge grump and complain about it

[Tinhampton]

Repeal "International Hot Chocolate Day"

Category: Quite Serious, But Nothing To Be Scared Of

Effect: So good, it's NatSov!

Proposed by: Tinhampton

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DESCRIPTION: The World Assembly,
Praising various efforts to point out illegalities in the "International Hot Chocolate Day" act (including by designated jurisdictors);
Gobsmacked at the obviousness of these illegalities, such as:

• Consisting of various amendments, which are also prohibited;
• Enforcing itself onto non-WA members; and
• A contradiction which states that everybody will have a good time, unless they choose to complain;

Noting that each nation has a choice to decide whether or not to serve their denizens Hot Chocolate on a certain day of the year;
Amazed, to say the least, that national governments would be realistically expected to comment on the weather;
Concerned that the size of the hot chocolate is only given as "yuuge," with no specific details given;
Ergo, concerned that offering only two optional extras will not be considered good enough by many hot chocolate drinkers; and
Pointing out that the world is currently going through some exceptionally pressing issues which deserve more attention than hot chocolate, such as:

• Deadly rollercoaster malfunctions at Six Hundred Flags theme park;
• Violetist infiltration of schools occuring in countless areas of the globe;
• The "Official Residences for Leaders" campaign, which is making waves and has already seen countless successes;
• Social justice issues like poverty, starvation and equality;
• Exceptionally long queues for diplomats to travel to Daguo;
• Whether or not the Stylishly Evil Kingdom of Katganistan should be the latest nation go to war with Bigtopia over ongoing protests occuring around the world, after hundreds of separate police killings of Bigtopians abroad, and a military killing of a Bigtopian tourist after the violation of Katganistan Defense Regulations Volume 4, Bylaw 8-A, Chapter 23, Section G-17-5, Paragraph 4b; and
• A wide array of other problems which cannot be listed here in order to keep this proposal acceptable to the vast majority of people;

HEREBY REPEALS "International Hot Chocolate Day".

Co-authored by Sierra Lyricalia

D-A SMITH: I hate to be a killjoy, but an act like "International Hot Chocolate Day" that contains blatant mistakes like these should be repealed, to be frank. I co-authored Sierra Lyricalia due to their help in pointing out illegalities within IHCD. If you desperately want to find out about the lack of size details, I made a Freedom of Information request. In case you're wondering where I got all those issues, I read something on LeaksPedia called "Issues Dossier for Receipt of Leaders - TOP SEKRIT!" (OOC: the Issues SPOILER ALERT thread). If you're wondering where I got the war plans... well, I picked up a copy of a Katganistani newspaper dated November 18, 1993.