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Most Irresponsible Marketing Scheme in Motorcycling History

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Allanea
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Posts: 26052
Founded: Antiquity
Capitalist Paradise

Most Irresponsible Marketing Scheme in Motorcycling History

Postby Allanea » Mon Feb 15, 2010 11:08 pm

Image
Allanean Arms “Rebel”


Have you wanted a bike?

Have you wanted a motorbike since you were 14 and couldn't get one?

Well, Allanean Arms always believed that to get rich, you must do what the customers want. In capitalism, the only way to get rich is to improve your product – or make your product cheaper. And this time around, Allanean Arms does both.

The Allanean Arms “Rebel” is a cheap, affordable motorbike – priced at only $5,000 MSRP. Lacking many personal comforts and styling features that are common on regular bikes the “Rebel” packs an incredible 180 bhp, 1300-CC engine. Modern plastics are used in the construction of several non-load-bearing parts, establishing a weight of only 220 kilograms. One of the many things we saved money on was the speed limiter chip present on many foreign motorcycles – it is completely absent from the “Rebel”, enabling a maximum speed of three hundred and fifty kilometers per hour.

Though extremely fast, the “Rebel” is equipped with high-performance titanium brakes, enabling you to avoid or mitigate a variety of accidents. But above all, the consideration in constructing the Rebel has always been cost – the ability to bring one of the fastest mainstream production bikes in Allanea into the hands of the beginner consumer.

We at Allanean Arms have a vision – to bring a fast, furious, awesome motorcycle into the hands of every youngster out there eager to ride one. We have already been condemned for it by the sort of stuffy do-gooder that opposes anything that they think is dangerous – no matter how fun it may be. The Prestonian monthly “Moto” had derided the “Rebel” as “a well-made machine flying under the most irresponsible marketing scheme in motorcycling history”. The Bavinese Road Warriors has nicknamed our motorcycle “too good to be cheap. The Allaneans should double the price for decency's sake, if for nothing else.”

But we are Allanean Arms.

We laugh in these people's face – we will make the bike available for you at $5,000 and not a dime more. Because you deserve it. You deserve the freedom and exhilaration of the road. You deserve to feel the wind on your face and the speed in your blood. You deserve it – the very embodiment of Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness – your own motorcycle.

Because face it – when you're pursuing happiness, you want to be going fast.

NOW BANNED IN ONE NATION! BUY YOURS NOW WHILE YOU ARE STILL FREE TO!


Name: Rebel
Manufactured: Kurzweil Province, Allanea
Speed: 350 kph
Weight: 220 kilograms
Engine: 180 bhp/1300cc
Sales:

Nachmere: 4,500,000



OOC: This isn’t a regular storefront. Basically what you do here is just post however many of my cars are sold in your nation per year and I’ll note that in my stats. Note, the following (Van Luxembourg is due credit for this):

[quote=”Van Luxemburg”](OOC: About car sales: There were about 220,000 cars sold in The Netherlands last year. That's on a nation of 16 million people. in the US, 16.5 million cars were sold in 2006. That's for a nation of 300 million people. Just to give you an idea of the total car sales of a nation, so you can calculate your own.)[/quote]

Click here for additional Allanean vehicles.
Last edited by Allanea on Tue Dec 02, 2014 10:29 am, edited 7 times in total.
#HyperEarthBestEarth

Sometimes, there really is money on the sidewalk.

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Allanea
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Postby Allanea » Tue Feb 16, 2010 11:13 pm

Bumped.
#HyperEarthBestEarth

Sometimes, there really is money on the sidewalk.

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Allanea
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Postby Allanea » Mon May 24, 2010 4:16 am

Bumpity?
#HyperEarthBestEarth

Sometimes, there really is money on the sidewalk.

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Nachmere
Minister
 
Posts: 2967
Founded: Feb 18, 2009
Ex-Nation

Postby Nachmere » Mon May 24, 2010 4:51 am

Excerpt from “Motopower” Monthly Motorcycle Magazine

“Absolute Lunacy”- That’s the first response to the Allanean Arms “Rebel”. The words crossed my mind as I flew at a biblical 340 kilometres per hour along the 1E Highway. The top speed for the “Rebel” is actually 350, but I was already pissing my pants with a combination of fear and joy at 340....Completely uncomfortable, like riding a bag of rocks. Naked.....In short, this is the most fun you can have with 5,000 Dollars short of going into the red light district in Shurat. If you have some cash left we also suggest pre-paying for a coffin.


Sales at first week of availability- 1,500 bikes.
Predicted sales per year- 30,000 bikes.

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Radictistan
Minister
 
Posts: 3065
Founded: Nov 21, 2008
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Radictistan » Mon May 24, 2010 8:19 am

An excerpt from Radictistani Driver: The Official Magazine of the Royal Automobile Association
The "Rebel" has sold well among the young and relatively affluent, accounting for over sixteen hundred units in the first two months of sales. According to the Ministry of Transportation and Infrastructure, the "Rebel" has seen a death rate per kilometers driven 36% over the Radictistani norm for motorcycle use.


An excerpt from The Nuxenstat Word
It's official. After one thousand eight hundred and twenty-nine sales in Radictistan, the Allanean reign of terror is over. Emergency legislation passed by the Parliament in Nuxenstat has banned the importation of any two-wheeled motorized vehicle with a maximum ungoverned speed over two hundred kilometers an hour unless a secure speed-regulating device is installed. That statute would prohibit the sale of the controversial "Rebel" motorcycle. Some Fascist Democratic MPs warned that the bill was an overreaction based on popular fears rather than sound reasoning but they were unable to prevent the bill from passing with a wide margin. The law is expected to receive Royal Assent later today and be put into effect by the end of the week. This parliamentary action comes just four days after a video of Royal Air Force Academy cadets street racing on the Allanean motorcycles appeared on an internet video-sharing website. Third-Year Cadet Johann Sporkteller was killed in that incident. At least three other cadets have been recommended for separation from the Academy.

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Allanea
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Capitalist Paradise

Postby Allanea » Mon May 24, 2010 8:34 am

NOW BANNED IN ONE NATION! BUY YOURS NOW WHILE YOU ARE STILL FREE TO!
#HyperEarthBestEarth

Sometimes, there really is money on the sidewalk.

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Orussia
Minister
 
Posts: 2894
Founded: Jan 01, 2012
Ex-Nation

Postby Orussia » Sat Apr 20, 2013 12:53 pm

Image
Public Service Announcement from the Orussian Ministry of Transport




Due to the increasing numbers of Allanean Rebel motorcycles proliferating throughout the Empire, the Ministry of Transport undertook a safety study to certify the motorcycle for future import clearance.

The results of this test were quite shocking.

Not only was the bike excessively fast for average Orussian roads, the test found the bike unsafe to even accelerate, due to its propensity for climbing onto its rear wheel. The motorcycle also was highly unsafe in a crash, as the fuel tank was found to be too thin and brittle to survive a high-speed impact.

Due to these shortcomings, the Orussian Ministry of Transport has made the decision to ban further imports of Rebel motorcyles until these shortcomings can be rectified. All purchased motorcycles must be handed over to authorized personnel at your nearest Ministry of Transport hub, along with the purchase reciept, and all owners will be credited the purchase price plus 10%.

Failure to comply will result in fines and confiscation of the vehicle.


We apologize for any convenience this may cause, but the safety of our citizens is a priority!
Last edited by Orussia on Sat Apr 20, 2013 12:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Allanea
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Posts: 26052
Founded: Antiquity
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Allanea » Sat Apr 20, 2013 12:55 pm

NOW BANNED IN TWO NATIONS! BUY YOURS NOW WHILE YOU ARE STILL FREE TO!
#HyperEarthBestEarth

Sometimes, there really is money on the sidewalk.

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Allanea
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 26052
Founded: Antiquity
Capitalist Paradise

Postby Allanea » Tue Dec 02, 2014 10:29 am

Bumped due to increased sales in Nachmere.
#HyperEarthBestEarth

Sometimes, there really is money on the sidewalk.


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