Uldartre Academy (IC, Year 2 cont., signup first)

[Greater vakolicci haven]

Erima shook the girl's hand with what warmth can be shown by a girl in the midst of a crowd she personally thought abhorrent.
"It is good to meet you," she said. "Where in the world do you come from? I confess I do not recognise your accent. Welcome to Celeria, by the way."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“I come from Daristan.” announced Katyusha proudly, tactfully omitting the full title of the land from where she came from. No doubt that it would be criticised by these people who didn’t know of Comrade Leader and his achievements and boundless benevolence. Surely if these girls knew what the SGDPPR was truly like, they’d have tried to immigrate already, but it was probably already too late to educate them on what really was good and bad. “I do not recognise your accent either but I assume it is Celerian?” she inquired.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"I'm sorry," the girl said embarrassedly, her face displaying a rapidly-growing blush. "I don't know where Daristan is...is it large? I've honestly never heard of it. Oh...and it's Celari, by the way, not Celerian."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“Daristan is quite small. There’s only 37 million of us.” Katyusha explained, slightly glad that Erima did not know Daristan, lest she have been taught bad things about the place, although at the same time she was slightly surprised that someone hadn’t heard of the place, with it clearly being such a brilliant land. Making a mental note of the irregular noun (or adjective, dependent on context) Celari, she made an inquiry. “This is the bar, right? Where can I get a drink?”

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"Pretty small place then," Erima said with a smile. "iIt's not a proper bar really...it's a lot of drinks bottles and taps behind a counter that's perpetually unmanned. You've got to get your drinks yourself. Do you want me to get something for you? I've already been on barmaid duty once today so why not again..."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“Well, if you’re offering , I’ll take the strongest thing that’s there. It’d be nice to go for something other than vodka for once in my life.” she told Erima, smiling a little, genuinely. “How many people are there here in Celeria?” she questioned. Daristan didn’t feel small to her, although she had been taught that other places were quite literally hordes of promiscuous tribals.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"Would you like to rethink that request," Erima urged, smiling. "This is Celeria...you don't want to ask for the strongest option on the menu, incase you actually get it. You won't like it, whatever it is...I'll have to check the bottles for the strength of some of the weird things that people bring in. Oh...their's just over 600 million Celari, but we're part of the Greater Vakolicci haven which is nearly 20 billion people...we're by far the smallest province. We're the wealthiest though."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“Twenty billion? Are contraception and monogamy existent concepts in the Haven!? “ exclaimed Katyusha, unable to hold back. “Like does no-one wait until they’re married here or what ; how does it work?”

A stiff drink probably would be a good idea at this point. She hardly expected civilisation but damn, it was almost as if her government had sent her to the worst possible place in order to test her as best they could.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"Uhm...what?" Erima asked, a look of confusion entering her face. Was this girl stupid? It was almost as if she'd gone to Celeria, expecting to fit in without knowing the first thing about it, or the Haven in general. Ridiculous.
"The Haven's...one of the largest countries in the world," she explained. "Well I say country...it's more of a union of countries. You've got Celeria, which is 600 million people...so by far the strongest yet best, then Velstrania in Varathron with...about 2 and a half billion people living in it, then you've got the Vakolicci Haven, which is all around the world...it's actually in 3 regions and not contiguous at all...that's the largest province with about 10 billion people, Finium has 6 billion people...they only joined the Haven a few months ago, along with Hadea, and they don't keep stats so no one's really sure what they're populations are. But...to answer your question, waiting until marriage doesn't really exist here no...I know it does in some places, but you've not come to one of them I'm afraid. You know the exchange program only started a few days ago? One of the guides," she said the word as if it was funny, "Think of the word for a moment will you? These are guides...they've been given some responsibility. Surely they must be responsible then. Well...she's already in bed with an exchange student. And another...is in bed with another exchange student of the same gender. To look at them you'd think they'd been together for years."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“So how much food and land do you need to feed and house twenty billion people?” she asked, fascinated by this totally different culture and society. Yeah, it was backwards and immoral, but interesting - a whole union of barbarians was so brilliantly odd. Especially if the so-called guides were already corrupting exchange students…

Unsure as to where her drink was, she began to probe. “When you say that you’d think they’d have been together for years, is that in a positive or negative way?”

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"Posative," Erima said happily. "Both couples...just click, if you get what I mean...especially the gay couple. Maria, the other student guide is super controlling...as in disturbingly so. I heard she tracks her boyfriend via GPS, if you can believe that one. Elosqir...oh that's the student guide. He's from Velstrania. Learn it...Velsturmen have weird names. I'm not sure there's such a thing as a standard Velsturman name. They just put a load of letters together, and call their kid that...and then the kid grows to about 8 foot tall and becomes very religious or quite possibly evil or quite possibly both. So yeah...Elosqir's really protective of his boyfriend...but I guess that comes from living in a wartoarn country."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“Does Maria’s boyfriend consent to that though? Like you know some people are submissive and that they find assertive really attractive. My, um, ex-boyfriend was like that last year when we courted, but, well, I’m not exactly the commanding type.” she divulged, blushing in the knowledge that it wasn’t a topic she should have touched upon. “And you said 8 feet? As in after 6 and 7?” she enquired disbelievingly.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"I'm 5 ft 9," Erima said. "Then you get 6 foot tall people, which is normal. Then 7 foot tall people, who we call basketball players. Then 8 foot tall people, who we call either Velsturmen, or dead from the myriad of conditions you can get when you're stupidly tall. But yeah...Velsturmen can grow stupidly tall, do not ask me how, I don't know. As for the boyfriend...I've not met him myself...but he claims he's got nothing to hide, and that he doesn't have an issue with it whatsoever, so I guess we shouldn't criticise. Oh...by the way, do you own a gun?"

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“I have a gun.” confirmed Katyusha. Comrade Leader hadn’t let her venture out into such a place without some means of self defence, and it was provided in the form of a 7.62mm handgun that looked rugged yet trusty, mainly because it was older than the girl that wielded it. She also knew how to use it - it was standard training as part of the (completely mandatory) Revolutionary Army Cadets group.

[Camelone]

Frederick walked over to the student bar, in his uniform instead of his normal clothing, with his cane making a clicking noise. Upon arrival he went around the bar and grabbed a bottle of water, when he pulled his head back up he saw a new face and she didn't look like she was around here. "Hello my friend may I ask who you are?" He asked than he saw the gun and raised an eyebrow "Nice sidearm, how's the kick on it?" He asked another question which his stutter kept breaking up.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"I go to museums as well!" Erima said in mock excited voice, regarding the girl's gun...inside she was deeply groaning.
"However...I don't generally bring anything back with me when I go. Would you like to consider a gun from this century, or would you prefer to be an amusing yet easy target for any criminal who wants to attack you? Oh...and what the hell have you come as?" She turned to look at a boy wearing some form of military uniform tapping a walking cane on the floor.
"It's King Eliscan the second come back from the dead, I believe. Nice of you to show up."

[Camelone]

"I am Crown Prince Frederick Krieger of Camelone, veteran of the Camelonean War of Separation. Please do not use the word 'king' while talking to me because I wish for my father to live a long life, though the Thanes probably would accept me as their liege lord as I have already given much to the realm, like my ability to walk straight and my speaking ability." Frederick said trying to control his stutter while also keeping his temper under control from the lack of respect given to a deceased king.

[Woodstovia]

"I didn't I'm just copying what I've seen massagers do." Allen replied.

"A billion?" Scarlet asked breathlessly as if she couldn't even imagine how much that was. "I'd spend it on making a palace, it'd be perfect!" she said happily.

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

"This weapon gets the job done. It's more than enough to kill you, for instance." Katyusha countered harshly through gritted teeth. "I'd still consider a gun that you like." she added, repressing eagerness concerning finding out what sort of weaponry these people had on tap.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"Yeah it could," Erima admitted, drawing her own rifle. "This could kill you and all your friends though while you're still reloading. It also looks far more impressive...if people see that cute little thing at your side they'll laugh as they shoot you. Then they'll make a bit of money selling your gun to the historical re-enactment society, they're always looking for things that look like they're from the civil war. Talking of the civil war...Frederick or whatever your name is...have you ever considered war re-enactment as a hobby? Admitedly I don't think enspiring speeches are really going to be your strong point...but well, their are some roles entirely on a horse so you don't need to do a floor drum roll every time you walk. Or better still...go to the hospital and get whatever's wrong with you sorted out."

"A palace?" Lucas asked. He was beginning to understand why Scarlet's 'daddy' didn't want to give his daughter the keys to the royal treasury. "I've already got a palace. This is a good show of how cobbled together from little bitties Celeria actually is. My palace is actually bigger than the King's, because Alterno used to be an independent country."

"You're a good fraud," Alicia laughed. "I don't think I could coppy that. This is the first time I've actually been happy since you fainted."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“I can kill twelve people with twelve shots before I have to reload.” Katyusha argued, putting her gun away. “And it’s not as if I’d just stand here like a mong waiting to get shot in return.” she told Erima defensively, moving to get herself a drink because the whole offer of getting drink for her had clearly slipped Erima’s fragile mind. It was very foolish of her to not take Katyusha’s weapon seriously. There was absolutely nothing wrong with it.

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"Would you like to test our skills in the shooting range?" Erima asked, standing up, and smiling with the knowledge of her own weapons skills. "Oh...and what drink was it that you wanted? I'd not recommend the strongest drink, because it'll be truly horrible."

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“If you really do recommend not the absolute strongest, then how about something strong but still nice? What would you drink?” Katyusha said, harbouring a little suspicion as to whether Erima would really pick something with good intentions in mind. “I’ll show you how it’s done in the range.” she agreed, deciding at that moment that one drink would be it ; as to not impair her shooting skill. In Daristan, weapon handling was taught diligently to those who actually got to learn how to use firearms ; those who demonstrated loyalty to the state and would likely end up in the frankly huge (in relation to total population) armed forces. Her instructors and teachers did not tolerate inaccuracy or slow draw times or anything of the sort and it would be mighty impressive if Erima could even compete, she reckoned. Hell, Katyusha could probably win medals for weapon handling...

[Greater vakolicci haven]

"Ah," Erima said, taking a running jump over the bar. "What I drink's called Meldorna...it's a traditional spirit. It's not really sold outside of celeria, it's quite sweet and nice, but it's quite likely to get you drunk if you have a few. She poured too enormous measures of a golden liquid from one of the larger bottles stacked on the shelves of the bar, and handed one to Katyusha, taking a long gulp of her own and sighing contentedly.

[The SGDPPR of Daristan]

“Meldorna? I’ve never heard of it, but thanks.” Katyusha told Erima as she took the glass of stuff from her Celari friend, if she could be called that, Acquaintance would be more appropriate. “That is actually quite nice.” she mused, after taking a small sip to test the waters. “Where’s the nearest shooting range?” she explored, itching for the opportunity for a showdown, even if it were not the duel kind.