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by **Nationalist Eminral Republic** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 10:05 am

September 19, 2014

Michael Mendoza

ONLINE

Federation of Eminral Republic

President of Eminral

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Politics, Foreign Affairs, War on Terror

Is feeling: Energetic
I would like to thank the people of the Federation of Eminral Republic for electing me to the highest position in the land. With the super-majority status you have bestowed upon the Grand Alliance (Nationalist-Christian Democrats), we shall give you a stronger republic.

As the first order of business, the Grand Coalition plans to introduce the Lebanon Mandate Act of 2014 within my first 100 days into office. While we recognize the presence of influential Muslim figures that does not wish to persecute Christians, the threat of Islamic extremism is higher than the influence wielded by secularists. It is therefore in the interest of our brothers in the Middle East, and I believe the highest moral mission of our country, to establish a Christian mandate that will seek to respect Christians and their beliefs, regardless of their sect.

The Federation also throws its support to Asigna in its fight to defend South East Asia. However, we strongly encourage peaceful resolution in the region. As per the advise of the EAF High Command, the EAF suspends its operations in Burma until next week, to assess and prioritize the situation in the Middle East. We must note that attacks on Eminrallian Filipinos is unacceptable and will be dealt with the severity it deserves.

The government will also proceed with the postponed deal with the Ganosians over the secession of the Eminrallian Western Asia Territories, with Andaman and Nicobar Islands as exception. According to the agreement, Ganosian troops will be able to operate within the Andaman Region alongside Eminrallian Forces. We believe that this will further advance Eminrallian-Ganosian Relations.

Our government's full agenda, our proposed budget and other current issues we would like to take note shall be discussed on my speech to the opening session of the National Assembly. Please tune in to EBC News Channel for complete, full coverage of the speech.

1,907,293 Hits

by **Motokata** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 11:15 am

September 19, 2014

Motokatan Newswire

ONLINE

Motokata

NEWS

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: NEWS

MNW REPORT: A moderate 6.0 Earthquake hit the Motokatan Provence of Gingh Min, Early Wednesday Morning. Damage reports to buildings and roads with no major injuries or deaths. Situated 10 kilometers off shore, a Tsunami watch was issued by Motokatan Geological Survey and was retracted early Friday morning. No tsunami was reported along any of Motokata's coastlines.
More News at motokatanewswire.co.mt [/quote][/blocktext]

128,228,908 Hits

by **Central Asian Republics** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 11:23 am

Friday, 09/19/14

Kim_Jong_Un

OFFLINE

True Korea

Evil Dictator

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Political

Is feeling: Excited
Lol, I didn't know making real nukes were that hard. That's it! I'm buying some at the black market!
Translated by Punch Translator

9001 Hits

by **Riysa** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 12:28 pm

---------Friday, 09/19/2014--------

Marshal-General Mustafa Haddad (مصطفى حداد )

ONLINE

Riysa (جمهورية العربي ألفاشية الريسي)

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:Politics, Riysian-Axis Intervention

Flardanian delegation arrived, and the Cuscatlanis just did as well. Not looking forward to telling the Za'im that, instead of sending a proper diplomat or negotiator, they sent a teenage girl.

EDIT: I just told him, and now I hear intense typing coming from his office, which I'm presuming that it is a letter of complaint to the Flardanian government.

19302 Hits

by **Bolrieg** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 12:36 pm

Tuesday 15/09/14

Jalnatzic the Greatest

ONLINE

Bolrieg

Holy Crusaders

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: #EnemiesBeware

Mujihadeen Gangs, Mujihadeen Gangs you think you’re safe? Hahahahahahaha we will get you Mr Muji we will slaughter you, the Jalnatzic will do to your Islamic State Capitol what Starnalf IV did to Constantinople along with his Armenian Chums and loyal troops. You will die.

Communists, Communists you think you’re safe? Hahahahahahahaha we will get you Mr Red we will slaughter you, the Jalnatzic will do to your fields what Prazarg IV did to Kiev along with his Ukrainian Chums and loyal troops. You will die

Filipese Ustase, Filipese Ustase you think you’re safe? Hahahahahahahaha we will get you Mr Silly Nazi Wannabe we will slaughter you, the Jalnatzic will do unto the Punong what Beldred XI did to Dr Pavelic and his Ustase along with English Chums and loyal troops. You will die.

Or alternatively you lot can back off. We'll beat you with Tupac Rap Magic.

560000 Hits

by **Inyourfaceistan** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 12:58 pm

Sunday, 9/7/48

Let Freedom Rain!

ONLINE

In Your Face

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Politics and society, #2014UndisputedNavalChamps!

@Terten

Lol. Anyone can storm an embassy, but where did your carrier group go?
That's right Mo-Fo, Chuchara shares a sea border with Inyursta!
If any more ships go into Chuchara's southern water, they will go join 1/4th of Krjder's submarine force AT THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA!!!
No hostile ship gets within 400km of our coast bitches!

Thats, right! Inyursta wins the award for 2014 Undisputed Naval Champions! What! What!

199,456,187 Hits

Sunday, 9/7/48

by **Rodrania** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 1:52 pm

Friday 9/19/2014

YOLOMLG84

ONLINE

Rodrania

None

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:Politics

Is feeling: Angry
Those damn idiots who call themselves "Governmental police" just knocked down the door of my office and arrested my office mate! This needs to stop, I mean, seriously. That guy owed me $R 100 because I #REKT him in a noscope tournament on Call of Rodrania: Modern Battlefield 32 and now I won't get them back! They said he was a terrorist or some thing like that. When I told them to go to hell one of them punched me on the face and laughed at me because I was weak. It's not my fault to still live with my mother, okay? Now I can't go back to work until next month because they're "silencing" some people on the office. They also stole my video games

20,350 Hits

by **Vekalse** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 2:07 pm

---------Monday, 9/19/14--------

YASGURL246

ONLINE

China

Janitor

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: YOLO

Is feeling: Awesome
I can't believe I was dared to use this website, but, you know, YOLO!

13,826 Hits

by **Zanubiyala** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 2:11 pm

09.09.2025

EmirSayid

ONLINE

Zanubiyala

Emir of Zanubiyala

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:#TertenBusters, #AsignismisNazism

#BombAsigna!
@GreatTerten

Your men have low-morale and your army is fighting abroad and weak, your defeat is when you fight us the people of the Persian Gulf and the Arabian peninsula, we will defeat Filipino intruders.

It is rude to just blatantly call him an idiot, you must use well worded insults like “Dirty Pino”

7,190 Hits

by **Rhodevus** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 2:18 pm

---------WEEKDAY, 09/19/14--------

Angie Norra

ONLINE

Rhodevus

Game designer

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Gaming

Is feeling: Sad
@YOLOMLG84

So sorry man! I can't believe the government took your video games away from you. But, if anything it is just in time for the release of NollenSec Developers new game: World War Dead: Vampire Apocalypse. Let the fear and excitement of catching and killing vampires and their co-conspirators bring you to a new level of enjoyment. And, just for you, we will offer you this great new game for 50% off of its original price. I hope this helps you make it until your games are returned!

1,912,710 Hits

by **Yuzhou** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 2:22 pm

---------Friday, 09/19/89--------

Cap'n Shosomi

ONLINE

Yuzhou

YSF Tengri, Admiral

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Politics, Life

@Marshal-General Mustafa Haddad (مصطفى حداد ) What's wrong with a teenage diplomat out of curiosity.

I mean, I am confident my 7 year-old daughter can do a better job at foreign policy than most "Diplomats" I know.

#HonorsStudent

@Angie Norra Previews looked good, though Vampires are not my thing. The whole Yu navy awaits the next grand strategy game to come out your mitts though!

15,034 Hits

by **Hatay** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 3:46 pm

Friday 9/19/14

Lieutenant General Ali Umahad

ONLINE

The Republic of Hatay

2nd in Command of Hatayan Army

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Jihadist Hordes Attack!

Is feeling: Confident
Hatay will not tolerate jihadist movement against the Philippines, sanctions are at vote in Parliament. Hatay denounces this action of aggression and denounces the jihadist nation as a whole. God grant strength to the Filipino soldiers in the coming battles.

256 Hits

by **Aeyariss** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 4:05 pm

SATURDAY, 09/20/20XX

Raizen

ONLINE

AEYARISS

EMPEROR

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:FUN

Is feeling: expansionist~!
1st time here. Looks like lots of my fellow world leaders are converging here as well. Hello to all.

Not happy with what's going on in Chuchara and Burma. But I have absolute confidence with my fellow Axis leaders that we can conduct the pest control operations successfully. Perhaps I should bring my empire to intervene too? Expanding Aeyariss' borders to the East, into the Pacific might be a good idea. My country had become quite complacent lately, Aeyariss needs to wake up.

180 million Hits

by **Hatay** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 4:07 pm

Friday 9/19/14

Ali Golofad Hatay Pres

ONLINE

The Republic of Hatay

President of the Republic of Hatay

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: National Pride

Is feeling: Proud
Today, September 19. It is a great day in the hearts of Hatayans. Today our greatest monarch Abdul III. Was born. Given to us by God he performed great things. From Revolution against our colonizers. To rapid industrialization. Caping it off with fending off arrogant, greedy, selfish Italian fascist pigs and then Nazi monsters. Hitler's swastika was sent back to Berlin torn and ripped. By our brave soldiers guns and boots. Led by Abdul III we gained independence and fended off those who wanted to take it from us. He laid the foundations for Hatay's entrance into the Non-Alighnment Pact which we stayed in till 1971 after we saw genocide committed by Leonid Brezhnev in georgia joined NATO. R.I.P. Abdul Rafat. Greatest Ruler of our great nation. تحت راية الله!

2,567 Hits

by **Lolloh** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 4:18 pm

Friday, 9/19/14

PM Namurri

ONLINE

The Animal Federation of Lolloh

His Excellency, the Prime Minister of Lolloh

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Politics and Society

Is feeling: Resigned
Hm... being Prime Minister of a nation is hard when you're a hamster. And now I have to deal with all this fighting in Keldom and Ninnipar! You think a hamster like me shouldn't have to take, it but NO... Do you know how it is to deal with generals a hundred times your size, in an angry mood? I've nearly been killed more than a dozen times just talking to officials in my office, you know!
Anyways, I AM announcing some new measures to clear up the danger in Keldom, first of all: An additional Air Squadron will be sent to help defeat the Ponyist rebels, and I am glad to announce that Screaming Fury has been once again appointed Governor-General for another term, and that new Parliamentary elections will take place in Keldom in the coming weeks.
As to Ninnipar, I am less certain. The humanist/minority uprising is disturbing my Government a great deal, and I am quite worried about what will happen if I don't retaliate harshly. However, we must keep level heads about this, so I will call the another election in Ninnipar, which, unfortunately, will be the 10th in 8 months. However, I believe that this new Provincial Parliament should be united enough to organize a referendum for the South on secession and possibly integration with Ruolnik.
Thank you, and may the rodents be with you!

4 822 Hits

by **Republic of Libanon** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 4:59 pm

09.09.2025

SamirChamoun

ONLINE

Lebanon

President of Lebanon

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:#TertenBusters

#ThisIsLebanon
@GreatTerten

The Government of Lebanon is for now cutting off all ties with the Filipino Government until Terten and his party are out of officer.

We will no longer recognize the Terten regime, which betrayed us.

For Honor!
Ready!

Near Achrafieh, in the city of Beirut,
We stood, brothers, defending our homes.

There stand Lebanese next to the Lebanese, we're all brothers,
You won't get in Beirut while we are alive!

Fire your Uzi, Kalashnikov and Zastava
Throw grenade, chase the gang trough the spring!

Step forward, guns ready, let all of us sing the song:
"For our homes, brothers, for freedom we are fighting"

Listen you, band of Hezbollah volunteers,
Our revenge will get you even in Syria!

God's justice will get you, everyone knows that.
The soldiers from Beirut shall judge you!

Listen now the message of Saint Maroun:
"You won't get in Beirut as you couldn't enter it before!"

Oh, Lebanese, dear brothers from Beirut,
Lebanon won't ever forget you!

Nasrallah sent Hezbollah out to shoot the people down
He thought the Kataeb were dead in dear old Beirut town
he got a rude awakening with rifle and grenade
When he met the 1st Battalion of the Beirut Brigade

Chorus:
Glory, glory to old Lebanon, glory, glory to this nation
Glory to its Christian foundation and the men who fought and died
`No surrender` is the war cry of the Beirut Brigade

Hezbollah came from Sidon equipped with Syrian guns
men by the thousands, ammunition by the tons
But when they got to Beirut they were seriously waylaid
By the Fighting 1st Battalion of the Beirut Brigade

Chorus

We have few ammunition and no armoured cars to show
we`re ready to defend ourselves no matter where we go
We`re out for our Republic and to hell with your Commie state
`No surrender` is the war cry of the Beirut Brigade

Chorus

Come all ye Lebanese and join the Kataeb
To strike a blow for freedom when there comes our certain day
You know our countries history and the sacrifice it made
Come join the 1st Battalion of the Beirut Brigade

Chorus

7,190 Hits

by **Zanubiyala** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 6:33 pm

Islamic Jihad Front wrote:
(Image)
Sunday, 09/03

(Image)
Imam Abdul Quddus
ONLINE
Afghanistan
Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Religion

"Excepted are the men, women, and children who, being truly helpless, can devise nothing and can find no way. These God may well pardon, then, for God is indeed ever Pardoning, Much-Forgiving."

We must then become the embodiment of Allah's grace and strength. To the oppressed we shall come and the oppressor, shall only speak through us in the language of the sword. The hour is coming. The day of the greatest Jihad the world will ever see is coming.

Muslims around the world must be vigilant and must praise the coming war as a war of their liberation and their rise to see the Ummah.

777 Hits

Sunday, 09/03

Asma al-Zaman

ONLINE

Zanubiyala

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Religion

I think it should be noted that Imam Abdul Quddus is a liar, and obvious Asigna proxy.

My father Mohammed al-Zaman is wholly legit and not anyones puppet, and my older sister Rahaf was murdered by Asigna satanic thugs.

400 Hits

by **Fascist Republic Of Bermuda** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 8:12 pm

Friday, September 19th, 2014

That Guy on the Street

ONLINE

Fascist Republic of Bermuda

Bermudan Army Infantryman

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Politics and Society

Is feeling: Bored
Just a routine patrol day in Afghanistan. Why do the Americans get all the fun while we have to clean up?

259 Hits

by **Paddy O Fernature** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 10:10 pm

---------Sat, 09/20/14--------

The Jägerbomber

ONLINE

The Dominion

Spreading the Truth

Wrote a shout out to Islamic radicals everywhere just a while ago:

Category: #SilenceIKeelYou!

What's with all these Jihad blowhards who can't even successfully blow there own nose, let along blow anything else without outside help, trying to act like they are actually something to be feared? I mean seriously, it's sad when I'm a bigger threat then 3/4 of the hot air machines.

It's high past time that one takes a seriously long look at themselves and does a little self revaluation, if one finds themselves spending more time trying to talk big then actually acting big. Seriously Sleek Sheiks, how about you shut the fuck up and actually back up all the baseless threats that you keep spouting off on the airwaves at every turn? If not, people will start to wonder just how spineless you cowards really are.

Though in my opinion, the answer is blatantly obvious on that subject.

However, if any of you so called radicals wish to discuss the finer points of your views, I'm sure The Dominions Armed Forces will be more then willing to arrange a personal audience with Allah for you, no questions asked. Inquire within!

4,120,601 Hits

by **Nationalist Eminral Republic** » Fri Sep 19, 2014 10:50 pm

September 20, 2014

Eminral Broadcasting Corporation

ONLINE

Federation of Eminral Republic

Media

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:Politics

Today's Headlines:

-Christian Democratic-Nationalist Supporters starts to gather in front of the National Assembly building. Federal Police mobilizes to maintain peaceful demonstration. Huge conservative groups like Eminrallian Vanguards, Christian Alliance of Eminral, Eminrallians for A Better Federation and Strong Republic Alliance gathers. Supporters of Lebanese Christian Mandate shows up to support Christian mandate for Middle East.

- Eminral, Ganosian Governments negotiate military base lease deal. Reactivation of new borders underway as Eminrallian troops pull back from the 4 regions.

-President-elect Michael Mendoza releases sneak peek of government agenda on Punch. Momentum growing as the Grand Coalition's approval rate climbs to the highest point yet, 72%.

- Christian Democratic Caucus releases another bill, South Sudanese Christian Mandate, seeking to establish 2nd Eminrallian mandate for Christians along with Lebanon. Opposition questions feasibility of Lebanese mandate with the presence of Kataeb forces.

- Eminral backpedals on Southeast Asian offensive, hints military pivot to the Middle East.

-Government announces plan to eliminate reliance on Middle Eastern goods by 2025 as a part of protest against inaction of Middle Eastern countries on unequal treatment against minorities. Ganosian Iraq spared.

Full coverage of the swear-in ceremony of President-elect Michael Mendoza and the government speech starts on 10:00 AM Eminral Time. Please tune in to EBC for more updates.

994,501 Hits

by **Republic of Libanon** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 2:14 am

Nationalist Eminral Republic wrote:
(Image)
September 20, 2014

(Image)
Eminral Broadcasting Corporation
ONLINE
Federation of Eminral Republic
Media
Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:Politics

Today's Headlines:

-Christian Democratic-Nationalist Supporters starts to gather in front of the National Assembly building. Federal Police mobilizes to maintain peaceful demonstration. Huge conservative groups like Eminrallian Vanguards, Christian Alliance of Eminral, Eminrallians for A Better Federation and Strong Republic Alliance gathers. Supporters of Lebanese Christian Mandate shows up to support Christian mandate for Middle East.

- Eminral, Ganosian Governments negotiate military base lease deal. Reactivation of new borders underway as Eminrallian troops pull back from the 4 regions.

-President-elect Michael Mendoza releases sneak peek of government agenda on Punch. Momentum growing as the Grand Coalition's approval rate climbs to the highest point yet, 72%.

- Christian Democratic Caucus releases another bill, South Sudanese Christian Mandate, seeking to establish 2nd Eminrallian mandate for Christians along with Lebanon. Opposition questions feasibility of Lebanese mandate with the presence of Kataeb forces.

- Eminral backpedals on Southeast Asian offensive, hints military pivot to the Middle East.

-Government announces plan to eliminate reliance on Middle Eastern goods by 2025 as a part of protest against inaction of Middle Eastern countries on unequal treatment against minorities. Ganosian Iraq spared.

Full coverage of the swear-in ceremony of President-elect Michael Mendoza and the government speech starts on 10:00 AM Eminral Time. Please tune in to EBC for more updates.

994,501 Hits

September 20, 2014

Mariam Yasmine al-Khouri

ONLINE

Republic of Lebanon

Writer and host for Lebanese National Phalanges party Newspaper and television wing

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:Politics

This is truly a wonderful thing, many Christians of the Middle-East will become Lebanese citizens, not only that but this could also allow Lebanese diaspora to return to Lebanon, building up the Maronite Christian population of which I am apart to an even greater size.

Lebanon will become majority Christian country again!

It has my support!

However Eminral must keep Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses out of our country, Mormons and JWs are not Christians.

994,501 Hits

by **Zanubiyala** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 2:57 am

Sunday, 09/03

Lt. Juda al-Ammar

ONLINE

soldier in Zanubiyalan armed forces

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Religion, Politics, #WheresRahaf?

@GreatTerten so Where is Rahaf Aliya al-Hassan?

I haven't seen her on your faggot show, you claim she is fully alive.

So prove it, we do not trust you Terten!

77,000 Hits

by **Nationalist Eminral Republic** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 6:57 am

September 20, 2014

Eminral Broadcasting Corporation

ONLINE

Federation of Eminral Republic

Media

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category:Politics, Breaking News, #MandateWatch

Breaking News:
Government's plan on establishing a Christian State in Lebanon received support from Mariam Yasmine Khouri of the Lebanese National Phalanges Party. The brief statement was released on Punch. Christian Mandate Movement gets a huge boost. Former Minister of National Defense say the new Christian State, with Eminrallian guidance and help, will become the new regional power which can potentially rival Israel.

Meanwhile the leader of the Nationalist Party urges its Christian Democratic allies to speed up their decision on whether to proceed on South Sudan mandate. Party Leader Rep. Gilbert Talbot said deteriorating situation in the region might lead to difficulties with the plan. Labour-Socialists blasts the plan as wasteful.

794,311 Hits

by **Hatay** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 3:34 pm

Saturday 9/20/14

Luitenant General Ali Umahad

ONLINE

The Republic of Hatay

2nd in Command of Hatayan Army

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Burma

Is feeling: Appalled
#PeaceinBurma
That is my rallying call! I am appalled by the horrible conditions of displaced Burmese in the conflict. No home, no food, no money. Trapped in a crossfire between Filipinos and Cuscatlanis. Enough! I pray to god that Hatayan peacekeepers will change the loves of suffering Burmese people. Hatay does not affiliate with either side.

789 Hits

by **Hatay** » Sat Sep 20, 2014 3:54 pm

Saturday 9/20/14

Ali Golofad Hatay Pres

ONLINE

The Republic of Hatay

President of the Republic of Hatay

Wrote a shout out just a while ago:

Category: Entertainment

Is feeling: Relaxed
I would like to hold a vote on Punch to see what Punch thinks about these two Sean Connery films:
(Image)
Indiana Jones and the last Crusade-Plays Henry Jones Senior
Votes:

(Image)
The Hunt for Red October-Plays Captain Marco Ramius
Votes
Please # your votes. Ex: #The Last Crusade

4,357 Hits

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