(Proposal) Commend Christian Democrats

[The Rouge Christmas State]

Security Council,

Believing that commendations should recognize nations who have contributed to the improvement in all important areas of the diverse Nationstates community;

Wishing to officially recognize the nation of Christian Democrats for their outstanding contributions to Nationstates;

Applauding Christian Democrats assistance in the defense and return of the region Catholic to its rightful inhabitants with the passage of WA Security Council Resolution #82: Repeal "Liberate Catholic";

Noting Christian Democrats for their nine World Assembly resolutions:

• GAR #160 Forced Marriages Ban Act, which prohibits forced marriage in all member states and prevents member states from recognizing forced marriages performed in foreign countries.
• GAR #285: Assisted Suicide Act, which allows member states of the World Assembly to decide the legality of assisted suicide and euthanasia;
• GAR #175 Organ and Blood Donation Act
• GAR #200 Foreign Marriage Recognition
• GAR #213 Privacy Protection Act
• GAR #231 Marital RapeJustice Act
• GAR #249 Stopping Suicide Seeds
• GAR #253 Repeal "Freedom in Medical Research"
• GAR #285 Assisted Suicide Act
• GAR #310 Disabled Voters Act

Acknowledging the numerous regions in which Christian Democrats has made extensive and crucial contributions to, including:

• The Founderless Regions Alliance as Speaker of the Assembly, since 2015
• The Rejected Realms as the Officer of WA Affairs from 2014 to 2015 and currently the Citizenship Councilor
• Catholic as delegate in 2011, and Since 2014
• Right to Life, as the founder of the region and Supreme Commander of the Army
• Westphalia as Crown Prince and Regent, since 2012

Lauding Christian Democrats for their organization of an international archive dedicated to tracking national issues;

Further lauding Christian Democrats for their tremendous work towards recognizing two major national issues which the international community had previously not been aware of. Known now as:

• Electile Dysfunction, which deals with electoral reform, giving nations the choice to decide what form of government they wish to have, and
• Foetal Furore, addresses conflicts between police and pro-life activists outside abortion clinics.

Believing that Christian Democrats is worthy of being recognized for these achievements and the long-lasting impressions they have molded onto NationStates;

Hereby Commends Christian Democrats.

Co-authored by: Ovybia


Thoughts?
1st edit: changed wording
2nd edit: Listed all GAR's and changing wording
3rd edit: spelling changes and grammar
4th edit: removed real world reference
5th edit: added Security Council, and changed listing of issues written
6th edit: fixed "herby to hereby" and fixed alignment in Further clause
7th edit: Changed Further clause

[Tuvan ASSR]

Eh, he authored a few issues and WA proposals. Not much to commend for.

[United Massachusetts]

Eh, he authored a few issues and WA proposals. Not much to commend for.

CD is one of the most worthy nominees.
He's
-written issues
-authored proposals
-led Catholic and Right to Life
-served in the FRA and TRR

However, I have a few edits in bold or strike:

The Security Council,

BelievingNoting that commendations should cross political barriers and, in the interest of equality and fairness, recognize nations who have contributed to the improvement in all important areas of the diverse NS community;

We, the Security Council, do Wishing to officially recognize the nation of [nation=short]Christian Democrats[/nation] (known as CD) for their outstanding contributions to NS NationStates, many of which we could not list here but nevertheless give our appreciation for;

Complimenting CD's Christian Democrats assistance in the defense and return of the region Catholic to its rightful inhabitants with the passage of WA Security Council Resolution #82: Repeal "Liberate Catholic";

Applauding CD Christian Democrats for their nine World Assembly resolutions among which include:
GAR #285: Assisted Suicide Act, which allows member states of the World Assembly to decide the legality of assisted suicide and euthanasia;
GAR #160 Forced Marriages Ban Act,This resolution which prohibits forced marriage in all member states and prevents member states from recognizing forced marriages performed in foreign countries,
Acknowledging the numerous regions in which CD Christian Democrats has made extensive and crucial contributions to, including:
The Founderless Regions Alliance as Speaker of the Assembly, from 2015-present
The Rejected Realms as the Officer of WA Affairs from 2014 to 2015 and currently the Citizenship Councilor
Catholic as delegate in 2011, and 2014-presentsince 2014
[/Strike]Right to Life, as the founder of the region and Supreme Commander of the Army
Westphalia as Crown Prince and Regent, 2012-present since 2012
Lauding CD Christian Democrats for his organization of an international archive dedicated to tracking national issues;

Further lauding CD Christian Democrats for his tremendous work towards recognizing two major national issues which the international community had previously not been aware of . Namely, known now as:
Electile Dysfunction
Foetal Furore

Believing that CD Christian Democrats is worthy of being recognized for these achievements (and many more not listed in this resolution) and the long-lasting impressions he has molded onto the NationStates world;

Hereby Commends the nation ofChristian Democrats.

Co-authored by: Ovybia

[We Are Not the NSA]

Noting that commendations should cross political barriers and, in the interest of equality and fairness, recognize nations who have contributed to the improvement in all important areas of the diverse NS community;

I'd wrote out "NationStates" in full. Additionally, this clause creates the fairly easy counter argument of "so just because he holds a certain political opinion and has written some issues and resolutions he deserves a commendation?" Bringing up personal politics in proposals is never a good idea, because even with a clause about how people should accept all opinions, they won't. The resolution should focus solely on his achievements, not his political opinions.

We, the Security Council, do officially recognize the nation of [nation=short]Christian Democrats[/nation] (known as CD) for their outstanding contributions to NS, many of which we could not list here but nevertheless give our appreciation for;

I'm with UMass, sometimes nicknames or shorthand names are appropriate in resolutions, but this would be a case where writing out the full name is most appropriate. Additionally, the admission that a resolution does not provide a full list of events is never a good sign. Best to just leave out the unimportant stuff, and not address that you didn't mention it.

Complimenting CD's assistance in the defense and return of the region Catholic to its rightful inhabitants with the passage of WA Security Council Resolution #82: Repeal "Liberate Catholic";

Complimenting really isn't the best word choice here. I'd use "applauding" instead, and "Noting" in the next clause.

Applauding CD for their nine World Assembly resolutions among which include:

• GAR #285: Assisted Suicide Act, which allows member states of the World Assembly to decide the legality of assisted suicide and euthanasia;
  
• GAR #160 Forced Marriages Ban Act, This resolution prohibits forced marriage in all member states and prevents member states from recognizing forced marriages performed in foreign countries.

Even if you didn't explain each of them, I think at least listing the rest of the proposals would be helpful.

Acknowledging the numerous regions in which CD has made extensive and crucial contributions to, including:

• The Founderless Regions Alliance as Speaker of the Assembly, from 2015-present
• The Rejected Realms as the Officer of WA Affairs from 2014 to 2015 and currently the Citizenship Councilor
• Catholic as delegate in 2011, and 2014-present
• Right to Life, as the founder of the region and Supreme Commander of the Army
• Westphalia as Crown Prince and Regent, 2012-present

Meh. Holding lots of positions doesn't necessarily equate to doing a good job at them.

Lauding CD for his organization of an international archive dedicated to tracking national issues;

R4c violation in red.

Further lauding CD for his tremendous work towards recognizing two major national issues which the international community had previously not been aware of. Namely,
Electile Dysfunction
Foetal Furore

R4c violation in red. Also, I would prefer a description of the issue instead of its name, as I cannot remember which issues those are, or what the deal with.

Believing that CD is worthy of being recognized for these achievements and the long-lasting impressions he has molded onto the NationStates world;

R4c violation in red.

[Ovybia]

Believing that commendations should recognize nations who have contributed to the improvement in all important areas of the diverse Nationstates community;

Wishing to officially recognize the nation of Christian Democrats for their outstanding contributions to Nationstates;

Applauding Christian Democrats assistance in the defense and return of the region Catholic to its rightful inhabitants with the passage of WA Security Council Resolution #82: Repeal "Liberate Catholic";

Noting Christian Democrats for their nine World Assembly resolutions:

• GAR #160 Forced Marriages Ban Act, which prohibits forced marriage in all member states and prevents member states from recognizing forced marriages performed in foreign countries.
• GAR #285: Assisted Suicide Act, which allows member states of the World Assembly to decide the legality of assisted suicide and euthanasia;
• GAR #175 Organ and Blood Donation Act
• GAR #200 Foreign Marriage Recognition
• GAR #213 Privacy Protection Act
• GAR #231 Marital RapeJustice Act
• GAR #249 Stopping Suicide Seeds
• GAR #253 Repeal "Freedom in Medical Research"
• GAR #285 Assisted Suicide Act
• GAR #310 Disabled Voters Act

Acknowledging the numerous regions in which Christian Democrats has made extensive and crucial contributions to, including:

• The Founderless Regions Alliance as Speaker of the Assembly, since 2015
• The Rejected Realms as the Officer of WA Affairs from 2014 to 2015 and currently the Citizenship Councilor
• Catholic as delegate in 2011, and Since 2014
• Right to Life, as the founder of the region and Supreme Commander of the Army
• Westphalia as Crown Prince and Regent, since 2012

Lauding Christian Democrats for their organization of an international archive dedicated to tracking national issues;

Further lauding Christian Democrats for their tremendous work towards recognizing two major national issues which the international community had previously not been aware of. Known now as:
Electile Dysfunction, deals with electoral reform, giving nations the choice to decide what form of government they wish to have.
Foetal Furore, addresses conflicts between police and pro-life activists outside abortion clinics, inspired off of a real Supreme Court case.

Believing that Christian Democrats is worthy of being recognized for these achievements and the long-lasting impressions they have molded onto NationStates;

Herby Commends Christian Democrats.

Co-authored by: Ovybia

I made a few changes above, mostly grammar and spelling corrections.

Noting that commendations should cross political barriers and, in the interest of equality and fairness, recognize nations who have contributed to the improvement in all important areas of the diverse NS community;

I'd wrote out "NationStates" in full. Additionally, this clause creates the fairly easy counter argument of "so just because he holds a certain political opinion and has written some issues and resolutions he deserves a commendation?" Bringing up personal politics in proposals is never a good idea, because even with a clause about how people should accept all opinions, they won't. The resolution should focus solely on his achievements, not his political opinions.

What do you think of the paragraph now?

Meh. Holding lots of positions doesn't necessarily equate to doing a good job at them.

How would you suggest we change that? He certainly has done a good job by founding and running a region that is now in the top 100 of the world.

[The Rouge Christmas State]

Thanks for the help on this proposal.

[Ovybia]

Further lauding Christian Democrats for their tremendous work towards recognizing two major national issues which the international community had previously not been aware of. Known now as:
Electile Dysfunction, deals with electoral reform, giving nations the choice to decide what form of government they wish to have.
Foetal Furore, addresses conflicts between police and pro-life activists outside abortion clinics, inspired off of a real Supreme Court case.

Here's another correction I found. Unfortunately, that's a real world reference.

[John Turner]

Eh, he authored a few issues and WA proposals. Not much to commend for.

And The Red Fleet managed to take down ONE whole region by themselves. Didn't stop your crusade to make sure they were commended now did it?

[New Dukaine]

"As a former member of Westphalia, I fully support this proposal. Just...needs tweaking."

[Ovybia]

"As a former member of Westphalia, I fully support this proposal. Just...needs tweaking."

Thanks, what would you suggest to improve it?

[New Dukaine]

"As a former member of Westphalia, I fully support this proposal. Just...needs tweaking."

Thanks, what would you suggest to improve it?

At the beginning, add " The Security Council," then continue with the resolution

Clause 6 is a bit short

Clause 7 is too bloggy, and don't put known as, just put it in a sentence

Lemme show ya

Further lauding Christian Democrats for their tremendous work towards recognizing two major national issues and fixed them by starting the following
• Electile Dysfunction, which deals with electoral reform, giving nations the choice to decide what form of government they wish to have, and
•Foetal Furore, addresses conflicts between police and pro-life activists outside abortion clinics.

There. Also, I would prefer applauding over lauding

[Europe and Oceania]

Oppose.

[Consular]

This is very well written. I'm going to have to be personally opposed for ideological reasons, but I wish you luck.

[Consular]

Apologies for the double, editing posts on my phone is extremely difficult.

Clause 7 is too bloggy, and don't put known as, just put it in a sentence

You apparently like calling things bloggy, but I'm not convinced you have any idea what you're talking about. What does that even mean?

[New Dukaine]

Apologies for the double, editing posts on my phone is extremely difficult.

Clause 7 is too bloggy, and don't put known as, just put it in a sentence

You apparently like calling things bloggy, but I'm not convinced you have any idea what you're talking about. What does that even mean?

blog·gy
ˈbläɡē/
adjective informal
characteristic of a blog or blogs.


Or also known as long

[Drasnia]

Apologies for the double, editing posts on my phone is extremely difficult.

You apparently like calling things bloggy, but I'm not convinced you have any idea what you're talking about. What does that even mean?

blog·gy
ˈbläɡē/
adjective informal
characteristic of a blog or blogs.


Or also known as long

*sigh* just because something is long doesn't mean it's bloggy or bad. Generally in the SC, bloggy means filled with opinions or similar content.

[Ovybia]

RCS, I would keep the original wording for clause 7. The current one sounds stilted.

[Consular]

Apologies for the double, editing posts on my phone is extremely difficult.

You apparently like calling things bloggy, but I'm not convinced you have any idea what you're talking about. What does that even mean?

blog·gy
ˈbläɡē/
adjective informal
characteristic of a blog or blogs.


Or also known as long

"oh bloggy means something from a blog"

Wow, I never would have guessed. Thanks for stating the obvious in the most obnoxious way you possibly could.

I see you even made a post on the RMB of your region, celebrating that brilliant response. Must be pretty pleased with yourself.

Why didn't you just say too long in the first place? Didn't want to risk people understanding what you meant?

I don't know if you're new to NationStates or if this is just a new puppet nation of yours, but maybe you should think about if you really want to be one of /those/ people.

[Ovybia]

blog·gy
ˈbläɡē/
adjective informal
characteristic of a blog or blogs.


Or also known as long

"oh bloggy means something from a blog"

Wow, I never would have guessed. Thanks for stating the obvious in the most obnoxious way you possibly could.

I see you even made a post on the RMB of your region, celebrating that brilliant response. Must be pretty pleased with yourself.

Why didn't you just say too long in the first place? Didn't want to risk people understanding what you meant?

I don't know if you're new to NationStates or if this is just a new puppet nation of yours, but maybe you should think about if you really want to be one of /those/ people.

Let's try to keep this debate as constructive as possible. If you want to give New Dukaine advice, please do it by tg or at least in a different thread.

[New Dukaine]

"oh bloggy means something from a blog"

Wow, I never would have guessed. Thanks for stating the obvious in the most obnoxious way you possibly could.

I see you even made a post on the RMB of your region, celebrating that brilliant response. Must be pretty pleased with yourself.

Why didn't you just say too long in the first place? Didn't want to risk people understanding what you meant?

I don't know if you're new to NationStates or if this is just a new puppet nation of yours, but maybe you should think about if you really want to be one of /those/ people.

Let's try to keep this debate as constructive as possible. If you want to give New Dukaine advice, please do it by tg or at least in a different thread.

Umoja nods his head. This I have to agree with. I was just trying to give advice, as you can see consular, I am a bit snarky when debating, and we like making snarky comments on our region board. But please refrain from sending telegrams, as sometimes they can be quite annoying.

Umoja turns his head to Consular

Now, why can't you take in a bit of sarcasm? I'm not trying to be one of those people, I'm just trying to have a little fun! Just ignore me or even put me on my Foe list if you don't want to hear from me.

[John Turner]

Now, why can't you take in a bit of sarcasm? I'm not trying to be one of those people, I'm just trying to have a little fun! Just ignore me or even put me on my Foe list if you don't want to hear from me.

Being obnoxious and a dick is having fun? I can see how your career here is going to proceed.

[Drasnia]

Wait, you're saying we can behave badly and excuse it by telling people they can either add us to their foe list or shove it? Good to know. *makes note for future reference*

[We Are Not the NSA]

Apologies for the double, editing posts on my phone is extremely difficult.

You apparently like calling things bloggy, but I'm not convinced you have any idea what you're talking about. What does that even mean?

blog·gy
ˈbläɡē/
adjective informal
characteristic of a blog or blogs.


Or also known as long

"Bloggy" actually means that it is based on personal opinion without facts to back up the claims. It has nothing to do with length. Additionally, this is about average length for SC proposals, so I don't get where length even comes into this...

[Consular]

I am a bit snarky when debating

...but this wasn't even a debate. I simply asked you a question.

[Crazy girl]

Being obnoxious and a dick is having fun? I can see how your career here is going to proceed.

*** One week ban for flaming ***

That is taking into account your extensive history.