You're sort of close to realizing what the problem is here, but you're ignoring that what you call a couple thing, is you being a babysitter. If she can't just admit she has no idea either, or can't just say what she wants to do, then you shouldn't have to enable her to do it. You're sat there thinking of dozens of choices, when she often already has one in mind and just can't be fucked to tell you for some ridiculous reason. In my opinion, she's abdicating responsibility in case the choice she makes turns out to be shit. She wants you to make the decisions so she doesn't have to be blamed for the consequences. That they get angry when you don't play along with them actively abdicating responsibilities and such to you should be a huge wake up call to the ones who seem to think gender roles are just something men do to women, and not something women constantly demand men do in various ways. (And visa versa.) The reason just rejecting their bullshit pretending not to make a decision and making one yourself pisses them off, is because you're treating them like the inferior they are pretending to be when it's convenient for them. But men don't have much other choice other than put up with bullshit. I think when women pull this shit, we should immediately take them at their word and just decide they are temporarily a toddler until they snap out of these fits of abdicating adulthood, or at least start a good faith effort to curb the behavior. You wouldn't ask a toddler where it wants to go, not all the time, and even when you did you'd basically just be telling it because you know it wants to go there. Sometimes you'd just pick, and they'll be happy about it, or they're just something you kind of ignore the tantrum of and put up with.
I think previous generations of men would have just picked because the womans opinion isn't very relevant and he's expected to just pick, and women expect him to just pick. But now it's a really noticable thing because it's the fusion of womens liberation and traditionalism to benefit women. She gets to make the decision, without the responsibility for it.
I don't think men should play along with that dynamic. It's not good for either of us.
We've been detoxified of a lot, but not all, of our sexist bullshit. Noones been doing that for women. There are still loads of behaviors like this one they engage in. Men talk about this shit in private, but it doesn't seem to dawn on them the implications of these behaviors, they just chalk it up to women being weird. It's awkward in my opinion, because few men are willing to acknowledge it, partially out of lack of awareness which is fair, we should work to change that, but also partially because they are scared of womens disapproval, or their ego is so invested in their approval they gun for it without thinking. That's fucking pathetic. We're better than that. They need to be told this shit. For everyones good.
For womens good because... jesus christ... grow up and crucially, STAY grown up. For one thing it'd allow you to take direct control over your life instead of backseat fucking driving. Men will not view you as responsible if you're often doing things which you lack responsibility for. It just won't happen. The dissonance is getting more and more obvious.
For men it's good because we'd finally have an actual equal who didn't lapse into sudden bouts of nonsense.
I bet some are going to be pissed I just said they are acting childish, when the entire point of some gender roles is the infantilization of women. I dunno.
