[ABANDONED] Epic Rap Battles Of Misery!

[Eaischpnaeieacgkque Bhcieaghpodsttditf]

I'm sorry for those that don't like ERB, but I just had to make an issue about them.

Title: Epic Rap Battles Of Misery!

Validity: be a psychotic dictatorship.

Description: After just finding out that you were set up against the Maxtopian dictator, King Max the Insatiable, in the comedic internet site titled "Raps Against History's Greatest" (RAHG), you were honored. However, After realizing that the only reason you were placed with him because of your brutality and you ended up losing, your advisors have gathered around you to see what should be done.

Debate:
[option]"This is ridiculous!" screams @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Music. "This battle was set up to compare two savages against each other in a 'comedic' rap battle. They portrayed you as a violent and oppressive human being that showed no mercy for life what-so-ever. They made you lose against Max the Insatiable, a man convicted of genocide not once, not twice, but NINE times! You need to show the world that you are not as bad as that guy. Maybe a tax cut and letting people leave their homes once and a while will let the world know that you aren't a bad person."
[effect]@@LEADER@@ can commonly be seen kissing babies and helping out the needy in an attempt to regain their image.
[stats]compassion greatly increases, authoritarianism goes to 0, happiness greatly increases.

[option]"That's exactly why you lost!" exclaims your Chief of the Secret Police while torturing a baby. "You have been portrayed as weak and pathetic. You are a violent man that was recognized, so congratulations. However, the man who portrayed you made you seem like a kitten licking a lolly pop! Give us the green light and we will make everyone in @@REGION@@ know why you're called @@NAME@@ the Annihilator! Maybe then they will change their minds over who is more cruel."
[effect]@@NAME@@ has been condemned by the WA for its genocide of everyone not @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@.
[stats]authoritarianism greatly increases, defense force and police ratios greatly increase, death by disappearance increase slightly.

[option]"Yo Wow, don' take dis here seriously now you know das right!" states Epic Peter, the creator of RAHG and the actor who portrayed you. "Yo dis here iz all meant ta be uh little comedy fo' brothas. Ah never meant ta insult anyone by doin' dis here, but if you gots uh problem maybe you should watch mo' o' muh motha videos ta see dat it's all uh joke. While you at it, you should give me some funding so ah can create mo' phat videos. Don' make me come ova there homie..."
[effect]@@NAME@@ has been giving @@CURRENCY@@s to groups that insult their enemies.
[stats]IT +1, cuture increases slightly, compassion slightly increases.

[option]"Peter's right," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, you Minister of Things and Stuff, while listening to the battle. "This rap battle is hilarious! You should hear the stuff said about Max, it's all references about how he still lives in his mother's basement and sucks his thumb! The worst thing it says about you is 'You're the worst leader the world's ever seen / I'll drop you harder than you did to your GDP.' I mean seriously, we all need to calm down and get a grip on ourselves. Maybe if we tried to make @@NAME@@ have more rights and stuff and try to get a better economy, the world would see you as a good leader. Also, you need to take criticism better."
[effect]everyone in @@NAME@@ is suspicious after obtaining a ridiculous amount of freedoms over night.
[stats]civil rights and political freedoms +35 each, economy +18, compassion increases.

Description:
After the internet sensation Epic Rap Battles of All Time (ERBAT) made a video that put @@LEADER@@ up against the Maxtopian ruler, King Max the Insatiable, in a rap battle, your closest adivisors have gathered to demand something be done because you obviously lost the battle.

Debate:
[option]"This is ridiculous!" screams @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Music. "They portrayed you as a violent and oppressive human being that showed no mercy for life what-so-ever. They made you lose against Max the Insatiable, a man convicted of genocide not once, not twice, but NINE times! You need to show the world that you are not as bad as that guy. Maybe a tax cut and letting people leave their homes once and a while will let the world know that you aren't a bad person."
[effect]@@LEADER@@ can commonly be seen kissing babies and helping out the needy in an attempt to regain their image.
[stats]compassion greatly increases, authoritarianism goes to 0, happiness greatly increases.

[option]"That's exactly why you lost!" exclaims your Chief of the Secret Police while torturing a baby. "You have been portrayed as weak and pathetic. Give us the green light and we will make everyone in @@REGION@@ know why you're called @@NAME@@ the Annihilator! Maybe then they will change their minds over who is more cruel."
[effect]@@NAME@@ has been condemned by the WA for its genocide of everyone not @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@.
[stats]authoritarianism greatly increases, defense force and police ratios greatly increase, death by disappearance increase slightly.

[option]"There is another way," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of the Internet. "This video hasn't gone viral yet. All you need to do is to put the internet under government control and make the populous only watch what we say they can. Also, this insult won't go unnoticed. If you give the word, we can silence the creators so we won't have to deal with these insults anymore."
[effect]All internet activity for non-government regulated sites are outlawed.
[stats]authoritarianism slightly increases, IT +1, happiness -1.

Comments?
second draft made.

[Caracasus]

For the last one you could have it so your minister advises bringing in controls on the internet, so none of your citizens can access the website. That seems a bit more realistic to me. It'd have the same basic effect, though you'd need to change the flavor text.

[Golgothastan]

I'm sorry for those that don't like ERB, but I just had to make an issue about them.

Yeah, and then everyone who don't like - or haven't heard of - them will have to answer an issue about it.

[Eaischpnaeieacgkque Bhcieaghpodsttditf]

Changed option 3. Also, I'm a huge ERB fan and I've been thinking about making an issue about ERB for a while. I think that this would be a very interesting issue if put in place. Did anyone get the King Max reference?

[Golgothastan]

Also, I'm a huge ERB fan and I've been thinking about making an issue about ERB for a while.

I'm not sure you got my point. It's all very well to be a fan of something, but in most cases these things are niches that a majority of other players won't be fans of, either leaving the issues needing clunky exposition or rendering them incomprehensible. Pop culture references can work in an issue, but I'm less certain that an issue that takes pop culture as its entire premise is going to work.

And don't cite Harry Potter. Everyone's heard of Harry Bloody Potter.

[Trotterdam]

And don't cite Harry Potter. Everyone's heard of Harry Bloody Potter.

Also, that's one of the original Max Barry issues, which, frankly, aren't up to modern standards.

If you're set on making this issue, it would be better to use a NationStates-themed parody of this whatever-it-is-that-you're-such-a-fan-of (never heard of it, and with a name like Epic Rap Battles, I would expect it to be about rap artists competing to see who's better, not about comparing random celebrities against each other on vague criteria), rather than the real thing. Not that I'm sure that would be enough to make this a workable issue, but it's probably a minimum requirement. Make sure to keep the focus on public opinion which just happens to have become exposed through this one show, rather than making a big deal out of the rap specifically. Though, if you're going to be making an issue about rap, you should have at least one of the options actually be written in rap.

[Eaischpnaeieacgkque Bhcieaghpodsttditf]

I redid the issue.

[Sanctaria]

I appreciate the work you put into it, but it's not going to happen. It's waay too niche, and it pushes the "what would end up on your leader's desk" way past breaking point.

[Eaischpnaeieacgkque Bhcieaghpodsttditf]

I appreciate the work you put into it, but it's not going to happen. It's waay too niche, and it pushes the "what would end up on your leader's desk" way past breaking point.

dang, I thought I had something here. If that's what you think, it's probably for the best I abandon the issue. My main focus for a little while now was my issue about reversing digital currency. Thanks everyone for your comments, but it looks like this issue is done.