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[@DRAFT@] Tots in the job market?

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Toddsville
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[@DRAFT@] Tots in the job market?

Postby Toddsville » Sun Dec 18, 2011 12:38 pm

Okay I'll try one of these.
Validity: Valid for nations that have banned child labour.

Over a joke made in a press confrence to attempt to distract the public about issues in the nation the government has accidentally
sparked a heated debate over the legality of child labor.

[option]”Our children have the right to work,” rants @@RANDOMNAME@@, a talk radio host. “Who’s the government to say what I do with my kids. I say the government should just get out of child labor laws all together.”
[effect]More children call in ‘sick’ for school each
[stats]Child labor laws have been abolished, stupidity increases, economic freedoms increase, social welfare funding decreases, law and order funding decreases, youth rebelliousness increases,

[option]”Why not make ‘em work?” Argues @@RANDOMNAME@@, while shaking his fist at some rapscallions. “Kids these days are always out on the street disrespecting their elders with filthy words and large rocks. I’m spending a large amount of @@CURENCY@@ on window repair! Sending them to some labor camps would really crush their spirits, don’t you think?”
[effect]Nationwide ruffians are disappearing to work
[stats] Child labor laws have been abolished, civil rights decrease, happiness decreases, taxes increase, social welfare funding decreases, obesity decreases, rudeness decreases

[option]”Don’t let them take away my baby!” Screams concerned parent, @@RANDOMNAME@@, while intensely biting fingernails. “You just can’t! I need to send them to school, not work! We can’t do this to our children!”
[effect]Pro-child labor activists have been given a timeout
[stats]Education funding increases, intelligence increases, economic freedoms decrease, social welfare funding increases, taxes increase,

[option]"Okay, I got an idea to get everyone off your back," whispers @@RANDOMNAME@@, one of your senior advisors. "Just lower the minimum age for adulthood. That way kids could work but you won't have tots in coal mines."
[effect]The government has made a child labor compromise making everyone unhappy
[stats]economic freedoms increase, civil rights decrease mildly, crime decreases, stupidity increases, size of government increases a bit,

I whipped it up pretty quickly seeing the mods thread for more issues.
Last edited by Toddsville on Mon Dec 26, 2011 10:03 am, edited 5 times in total.

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Sedgistan
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Postby Sedgistan » Sun Dec 18, 2011 1:11 pm

Please check out Sirocco's sticky - the format needs editing. You don't have any effects/stats yet.

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Toddsville
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Postby Toddsville » Sun Dec 18, 2011 1:43 pm

Sedgistan wrote:Please check out Sirocco's sticky - the format needs editing. You don't have any effects/stats yet.

Added effects/stats. Anything else you need me to add?

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Frisbeeteria
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Postby Frisbeeteria » Sun Dec 18, 2011 1:53 pm

Toddsville wrote: Anything else you need me to add?

A little more time, a lot more thought. As Sedgistan said, no need to rush your entries.

Take a few days to revise and review, incorporate the opinions of others, and generally try to make this more readable. Also, look to the World Census for ideas on possible changes to your stats. There's much more to this game than the Three Freedoms.

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Bears Armed
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Postby Bears Armed » Mon Dec 19, 2011 9:31 am

Too much overlap?
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Sedgistan
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Postby Sedgistan » Mon Dec 19, 2011 12:54 pm

Bears Armed wrote:Too much overlap?

As per this thread, it's actually to deal with the consequences of choosing option 1 in that issue. Of course, while it's dealing with a similar topic, the approach should be different, and the options can't just be duplicates.

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Toddsville
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Postby Toddsville » Wed Dec 21, 2011 8:58 am

I kinda redid it. I gutted some options and added some options and added more stats. I took a different approach because I thought it was to much like 'Tykes with tools'.

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Frisbeeteria
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Postby Frisbeeteria » Wed Dec 21, 2011 9:33 am

This is a significant improvement over what I remember of the first one. I would suggest that you Spoiler your old versions rather than replacing them, so we can compare the revisions.

It's not clear to me which of these options actually eliminate child labor laws. "Child labor laws have been abolished" should be a stat for those that do, not an effect. As a rule, your [effects] should hint at the effect without ever actually spelling it out. The first [effect] needs to be completely rewritten. The second one sounds like it has possibilities, but the language doesn't work as written. The third is quite clever, but doesn't match the text of the [option], as child labor activists aren't even hinted at in the text. The fourth seems to indicate that child labor laws are both banned and not banned. Which is it?

Looking forward to your next revision.

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Fischistan
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Postby Fischistan » Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:34 pm

Change "mother" to "parent", you never know what the random selection might pick; it could be a boy.
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Sanctaria
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Postby Sanctaria » Fri Dec 23, 2011 9:45 am

Fischistan wrote:Change "mother" to "parent", you never know what the random selection might pick; it could be a boy.


If he wants to say mother, he can put in a female name. There is a list of names here you can use if you want to use common NS Issue names. You can also use humorous pun-like names too. Not too often though ;)
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Toddsville
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Postby Toddsville » Mon Dec 26, 2011 10:04 am

I worked on the effects and redid the description.


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