Cormac Tries to Coup Osiris and Changes His Name

by **The Prunes** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 8:12 pm

President Malashaan recently held a press conference to discuss a grand new threat to democracy.

"It would seem that the communists are trying to take over the Osiris delegacy and that without our aid they will surely fall. They are being led by former fascist, Wall Street banker, occupy Wall Street member, Pope and now devout Atheist Cormac. We will stop at nothing to defeat them and aid Osiris."

However, in the backrooms of Europeia there has been clear panic as they try to mobilize their puppet regions. The following logs were obtained from the Europeian Big Brother program:

Anumia: Muhahahaha, little does Unibot know how operation independence is going thus far...
Kraketopia: Yes...
Mysterious Figure: Ves... he nearly took avay TSPs "Independence" Day, but everyone thought he was crazy to suggest the link to our system of global oppression. How he must itch against the chains we set upon him! In vact, it worked better than we thought... we thought he would look ridiculous if he opposed it and we were right in thinking he vould!
Everyone: Muhahahahahahaha
Malashaan: Okay... anyway... we need to defend Osiris from Cormac right?
Mysterious Figure: But ov course.

It would seem that Cormac however has already claimed his first victory in the conflict. And he announced it at 9:48pm EST

“Hello world! I am Maccorm, the new leader of Osiran city of Jeblu and the rightful leader of Osiris. You might know me as Cormac, but as of this morning I decided to no longer go by my slave name given to me by the Imperialists. I will conquer Osiris and then I will spread libertarianism everywhere….. if only my government wasn't so fricken libertarian and could get things done.”

Will Cormac conquer Osiris? Or will the people stand up?

by **Ambrella** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 8:16 pm

Unsubscribe.

by **Consular** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 8:24 pm

What even is this

by **McMasterdonia** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 9:25 pm

i don't get it.

by **Yao** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 9:27 pm

Classic material.

by **Pauline Bonaparte** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 9:29 pm

A good start, but if I may offer some suggested changes:

1. Everything about this
2. More humor
3. Less non-humor

by **Joshua Ravenclaw** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 9:40 pm

*blinks*

by **The Sapientia** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 10:05 pm

Which part do I laugh at?

by **Tano** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 10:19 pm

Um...

by **The Mighty Warrior Horse** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 10:29 pm

I don't even write this bad

by **Applebania** » Thu Nov 27, 2014 11:53 pm

What?

by **Bhang Bhang Duc** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 1:59 am

I think someone's off his meds...

by **Ramaeus** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 2:12 am

Are you trying to say that Cormac switched sides again?

by **Rifty** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 2:59 am

Bhang Bhang Duc wrote:I think someone's off his meds...

Oh good it wasn't just me thinking this - what the hell is he on about? We all know Cormac would be out here bragging if this was the case.

by **Cormac Pendragon** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 3:23 am

1. Before anyone accuses me of having no sense of humor, I'm aware that this is satire. I'm also aware that the author uses "humor" to passive aggressively attack her political opponents.

2. I've been practically gone for almost a month and I'm just about a NationStates non-entity at this point, but it's good to see you still feel threatened by my existence.

3. If I had wanted to coup Osiris, I could have when I was Pharaoh. And Rifty is right, I would be gloating about it. I did write literally all of the incendiary, egomaniacal early OFO propaganda, after all.

4. If I was going to coup a Sinker, it would be yours. And it would be awesome.

5. I'm honored to join Unibot with a permanent residence in your head.

by **Klaus Devestatorie** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 5:46 am

I seem to recall opening various social media websites to try and find a gif that expresses my reaction to this news article using a facial expression. It's been 8 hours now, and I've settled on this.

Free at last, free at last, I thank God I'm free at last. :|

by **Solorni** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 7:00 am

Oh well, you win some and you lose some

by **Benevolent Thomas** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 9:03 am

Solorni wrote:Oh well, you win some and you lose some

This one was a moderate to sizable loss

We the people demand newer and more relevant targets! Also better settings than poopy sinkers. Better men than Unibot and Cormac deserve places in your head, I personally nominate Dyr Nasad and Rifty.

by **Solorni** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 10:44 am

I thought the slave name thing was fantastic and tried to build around it

Hmm, maybe

by **Rifty** » Fri Nov 28, 2014 7:56 pm

Benevolent Thomas wrote:
Solorni wrote:Oh well, you win some and you lose some

This one was a moderate to sizable loss We the people demand newer and more relevant targets! Also better settings than poopy sinkers. Better men than Unibot and Cormac deserve places in your head, I personally nominate Dyr Nasad and Rifty.

What about the Beast?

by **Anumia** » Sat Nov 29, 2014 8:26 am

Pauline Bonaparte wrote:A good start, but if I may offer some suggested changes:

1. Everything about this
2. More humor
3. Less non-humor

I think Rachel needs some sleep...

by **Common-Sense Politics** » Sat Nov 29, 2014 4:13 pm

I'd like to make sure there's a disclaimer somewhere letting everyone know that the average Europeian doesn't have a secret shrine to Unibot and his football shaped head in their closet.

by **Feux** » Sat Nov 29, 2014 4:32 pm

Common-Sense Politics wrote:I'd like to make sure there's a disclaimer somewhere letting everyone know that the average Europeian doesn't have a secret shrine to Unibot and his football shaped head in their closet.

>_>

<_<

Football shaped head you say.

by **Anumia** » Sun Nov 30, 2014 4:34 am

Feux wrote:
Common-Sense Politics wrote:I'd like to make sure there's a disclaimer somewhere letting everyone know that the average Europeian doesn't have a secret shrine to Unibot and his football shaped head in their closet.

>_>

<_<

Football shaped head you say.

Well-played.

by **Unibot III** » Sun Nov 30, 2014 2:55 pm

Common-Sense Politics wrote:I'd like to make sure there's a disclaimer somewhere letting everyone know that the average Europeian doesn't have a secret shrine to Unibot and his football shaped head in their closet.

You should get on that though.

Cormac Tries to Coup Osiris and Changes His Name

Cormac Tries to Coup Osiris and Changes His Name

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